80 thoughts on “Why You Should Embrace Rejection”

1. If you can conquer your own fear of rejection and just keep approaching you will eventually realize that there is nothing to fear. It’s all a numbers game. I’ve approached and been rejected by 6’s in the club and 10 minutes later I’m getting a handjob on the dance floor from an 8. It’s not really YOU that a girl is rejecting its their impression of that particular approach you’ve made. Rejection doesn’t mean anything. In fact, these days I look forward to it. It’s just funny to me. Fine. You want to reject me whore? I’ll move onto the next vapid slut, and guess what she’ll probably be even better looking than you. The same girl on a different day under different circumstances (and with a different approach) may be more receptive to the same fucking guy she rejected.

   1. And keep a sense of humor about it all. As a friend of mine used to say upon getting rejected : “That’s OK, I had to take a shit anyway”.

      1. “That’s OK, I have to take a shit anyway” <- this is gold haha! I’m stealing this, it’s brilliant. Thanks!

      2. YES I am using this

      3. Agreed, Some days your the pigeon and others your the statue.
         Keeping my sense of humor in situations like rejection is the only validation I need…

   2. ‘whore…vapid slut’ You devalue your post when you insult without cause. Are the whores and vapid sluts because they did and didn’t fuck you, or just by virtue of being female?

      1. “Act as if all women are whores” = in a game context this is the state of mind you need, remember? and regardless it’s not an insult without merit. Are you living in the same society that I am? you’re white knighting isn’t appreciated here.

         1. Fuck are you talking about mate? All women are whores and vapid sluts? Including our mothers and daughters? You sond like the type of fella who has some serious mother issues, can’t get laid and cries after u toss yourself off. There are plenty of sluts and whores out there, but that’s not all women. You come across like someone who finds it very hard to get laid.

         2. mother issues – check
            weak/intimidated by da strong wimmenz – check
            can’t get laid- check
            You forgot about my small penis though bruh bruh.

         3. It’s ok bro don’t worry about it. I know you have your dead mother under your bed, and you wear her nighties to jackoff, screaming ‘why didn’t you love me?!!’ etc

         4. I like how they say “our mothers and daughters” as if every woman in the world is our mother, sister or daughter LOL.

      2. Not really. He devalues the women so rejection carries no weight. All girls are cum dumpsters. That is game.

      3. Umm…By virtue of being female. Why else would they be in a club? For attention whoring and validation purposes? Oh no, let me guess..they just wanted to relax and have a drink with their friends. Yeah right.

      4. If they are American females then it is a safe bet they are vapid sluts.

         1. Applies to plenty of foreign women too.

         2. I’ve traveled a lot and outside of British women, American women are the worst I have encountered.

         3. The rest are less so?

         4. Yes. And my sample is from 20+ Euro countries, 6 Asian countries, and 3 South American countries. You haven’t found a difference?

         5. Oh. No, not in most of the girls I know … but I hardly go out, so my assessment wouldn’t be too accurate.

   3. Thanks typical. In light of the same thing happening to me recently, I appreciate the perspective.

   4. Disagree, The sad fact is too many men are in denial not realizing women via your attraction initiate the game. Almost like the hunter being the hunted…
      While she is giving that BJ I doubt she is thinking “Wow this dude has killer game.” The fact that you just called a woman a whore shows that rejection still affects you but there is no shame in this because humans as social creatures fear rejection almost as much as death. You cannot conquer an emotion only control them, acceptance is almost always preferable to rejection.

2. Rejection is stimulating. Success doesn’t teach nearly as much as failure.

3. I’d do her.

4. My best rejection was my first day game approach. That was my biggest hurdle and made everything after so much easier. At best, rejection is crucial feedback to learn where you need to improve, at worst you realize that you couldn’t have done anything better, either: she had a bf/husband, was on her period, you got cockblocked by a fat friend, she already got hit on by 20 guys before you, she’s sick, she’s a feminist, she’s a lawyer, she’s a lesbian, she has indigestion, she stubbed her toe, or any other of million variables out of your control.
   The most successful players, businessmen, athletes, etc. are also people who’ve been “rejected” or “failed” more than anyone else.

   1. she had a bf/husband

      That’s why I gave up trying to find a girlfriend at my college. I couldn’t believe how many wedding bands on women as young as me there were.

5. This is sarcasm, right?

   1. Have you ever cold approached? The worst part is worrying about rejection which stops you from approaching (I’m not feeling it, she looks like a bitch, I bet that guy is her boyfriend, etc). If you condition yourself to not care about rejection, approaching becomes easy.

      1. .

6. Lol. And what happens if you keep getting rejected? Over and over and over and over and over again? What if you have maximized your looks but still get turned down by a lot of girls? Large amounts of rejection with minimal success is damaging. What this website fails to teach is that our level in the game is genetically determined. That means our looks determines our level in the game. Only large amounts of money and status can over turn this. Sure, we can hit the weights, dress well and approach, but girls that reject you within 2 seconds don’t like your face. That means 30 rejections in one day = 30 girls did not like your face and did not find you sexually attractive. Its not good enough for them. If your a 5, the best you’ll do is a 6 even if you are maxed out (unless you have a lot of money or status, which most men cannot acquire). You will never bang a 9 if you are a 6. Facial aesthetics = everything. All men who tag attractive girls are good looking.

   1. Or you can go overseas and be a rarity. If you’re into Asian girls and you’re a non-Black English-speaker, go to East Asia. You can be the ugliest PoS of all time and you’ll still be swimming in at least decent tang.
      Japan was like that too for Black guys back in 2006-08 to an extent. I went out there and scored on novelty alone, even though I was an anime dweeb that wasn’t making any gainz.

      1. What parts of Asia are you talking about? In Taiwan, I have seen the girls go for a certain type..blonde hair blue eyed and skinny. But other types of white guys don’t always do so well unless you are talking just 6 or 7’s.

         1. I’m talking all of Asia. I know that blonde/blue is the ultimate to the Asians, but from what I’ve seen and heard, any non-Black from an English-speaking country is going to get some in Korea, China, Taiwan, Japan, you name it. Black dudes used to do OK in Japan too, but those days are numbered.

         2. Alas! You can blame the entertainment industry for this, Admiral.
            Earlier in the twentieth-century, expatriate black Americans were considered exotic and sought after, albeit the game used WAS a tad different (“A tail, Mademoiselle? Absolutment pas! But if you’re curious let us go to my room and you can see for yourself…”) heh, heh.
            But now, after twenty years of exposure to Boyz’ n’ the Hood movies, gangsta rap and thug athletes the world at large has been conditioned to regard black Americans as subhuman monsters.

      2. Don’t tell me you were this guy:
         http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k1esrBKPRuo

   2. Are you a man or a mouse ? I’m a man and your comment disgusts me. Life is a battle between strong men for beautiful women. If a man needs to acquire money, status, a better physique, an impeccable social circle, fame, or anything else to access the women he TRULY desires he should get on with it without complaint and without delay. He should be striving in all aspects of his life for self improvement, every day working harder than ever before until victory is his. Has nobody ever told you that life is hard and then you die ? Embrace the struggle and get on with it !

      1. Who says I haven’t done all this stuff? lol. This is your typical blue-pilled response. “Try your hardest and you will succeed.” I am still in College. My personal resume is better then 99% of guys my age (4.0 gpa, 50K saved up while in college, 6 foot 3, 195 pounds with 10 percent body fat, Caucasian, style on point, condo coming my own way). HOWEVER, I still get rejected left and right within 2 seconds of approaching a girl. You know why? Its not because of my “lack of physique or success,” its because of my face. I am not the best looking guy. THIS IS THE ULTIMATE RED PILL. Genetics determine your game. My hard work and 100s of hours will only earn me a 6/10 girl while some bummed out model will slam 8-10s without every putting the effort needed. I can live with this because I plan on making a lot of money in my late 20s, but realize that this is the real red pill…Your game is determined by your genetics unless you can make millions of dollars or acquire the status of Zac Efron (which most cannot)

         1. I hear what you’re saying man but a few thoughts.
            1. Once you get out of college the dating market is different. Girls will size up your financial situation much more. In college most people are still being taken care of by mommy and daddy. Out in the real world your accomplishments will get you much further. Good on you for what you’ve accomplished so far.
            2. Definitely consider living aboad. My face is far from ideal. All sorts of incongruencies, not great teeth, bad hair..ugh…but I do well overseas. It’s better outside the US.
            3. Lastly, if it’s truly your face that is so bad, if you have the means you might consider some plastic surgery since you’re gearing up to be successful. Just don’t overdo it.

         2. Amen.
            There’s a reason why a man’s sexual market value peaks 10-15 years later, it gives him time to create, accumulate and maximize his resources. A 9/10 aesthetics guy who is homeless in his 30s is not pulling quality women.
            A chick peaks in value at 18-21, as their value is entirely based on genetics.

   3. Spend 1500 USD on a ticket to Thailand and sleep with that 9 that you want so much. And I am not suggesting even to pay, maybe she will be a Swedish goddess slightly drunk on the middle of the Full Moon Party.

   4. “All men who tag attractive girls are good looking.”
      Nonsense. Plenty of average looking guys pickup good looking girls routinely. I consider myself average looking and I don’t have the best game in the world but I can pull 7’s with good regularity.

      1. Highly doubt it. Unless they have some sort of large status or money, you are probably overrating the girl or underrating the male. Also yes, social circles will provide access for these males BUT it is mostly on a relationship term basis. I do not know any average looking guy who pulls decent women consistently. I am sure if you take all of the ROK writers and ask them to post pictures of themselves, it will be easy to tell who tags the hottest girls based on looks alone. Beauty is not arbitrary. Good looking men get attention everywhere they go. Out of all the guys I know and have ever met, the best looking ones were the ones were the ones fucking the most girls. Especially true in college where most guys are social stars (only the good looking athletes tag girls).

         1. I have a friend who gamed n closed a rich hot girl while he’s jobless, with no looks. He’s even got a bit of a beer belly. Now she’s lavishing him with everything he wants. Your words are utterly noisy and worthless like ice cubes on a hot stove.

         2. And I know hundreds of average men who take care of themselves and are still single and I see dozens of guys get blown out every night. Whats your point? Better yet, I see hundreds of single guys every day walking without a women. Your telling me none of these guys have “game abilities?” Because your missing the idea. For every guy you know that is “gaming” some hot bitch, there are hundreds of guys single even with the effort put in. Its not coincidence that out of the hundreds of males I have ever met in my life, the most attractive were the ones tagging the most girls and the highest quality. I am sure EVERY single poster on this forum has it the same way. They know 1-2 very attractive guys (model tier) that fuck the most girls. The game has leagues. Your league is set. deal with it.

         3. >The game has leagues. Your league is set. deal with it.
            It’s mostly true but people are uncomfortable acknowledging it because it dampers the “you can get every girl” circlejerk.

         4. But you’re not the one who decides what is attractive or not attractive to women, women do. A fat feminist can screech and believe as much as she wants that men want a reaaaaaaal (read – really big) woman, but that does not change what men find attractive.
            Do looks matter? Yes, a little bit. It’s an extra push, but in no way it is some sort of a game changer.
            “(4.0 gpa, 50K saved up while in college, 6 foot 3, 195 pounds with 10
            percent body fat, Caucasian, style on point, condo coming my own way).
            HOWEVER, I still get rejected left and right within 2 seconds of
            approaching a girl. You know why? Its not because of my “lack of
            physique or success,” its because of my face. I am not the best looking
            guy. THIS IS THE ULTIMATE RED PILL.”
            Sorry man, but it just sounds like you’ve got a chip on your shoulder, which in itself is a reason that you cannot get women. It sounds as if you convey your “I AM NOT GOOD LOOKING ENOUGH FOR YOU, THEREFORE, I AM BELOW YOU” to every girl you approach.
            Get rid of your insecurities, and stop bitching like a woman.

         5. Another comment suggesting that its my “personality” or “deamonor.” Sorry, but when you step to a girl, she knows nothing about your demeanour. She bases you strictly off looks. I carry myself with confidence and know the reality of the game. And its funny how people on here are attacking me for a lack of confidence when I know way insulted my own character except for objectively acknowledging the fact that I am not classically handsome. Read my success above before you attack me

         6. Is that you Alek Novy?

         7. “And I know hundreds of average men who take care of themselves and are still single and I see dozens of guys get blown out every night.”
            That’s not enough though and you know it. Taking care of yourself such as fitness and finances is a min requirement.
            The reason that these men fail is yes because they are average. However, you focus solely on looks. You can only be successful if you are great looking. That’s just one avenue. How about being awesome at music, acting, art, or writing etc? Those are ways to differentiate yourself and attract hot groupies. Every single activity has good looking groupies. It’s simply micro fame which isn’t impossible to achieve.
            But what do you Miscer? You focus on the one fucking thing you don’t have, facial aesthetics because you are a boring man, which is woman repellant. What do you like to do? Drink at the bar, go to the gym and watch/play? Join the countless number of American men. Way to swim in the mainstream where only the very best in a large pool get noticed. The reason that facial aesthetics are king in your circle is because you people are boring so it’s the one thing that is allowed to determine the winner.
            Do you do anything artistic? No. Why? Because it’s for phags right? Writing? Nah, brah, for phags. Acting? Nah broseph, for phags. The hottest chicks are into novelty,girls with artistic hobbies who flock to the men that excel at them. Hot women know dozens of hot guys hitting on them and they are bored by it. While alternative culture might attract some of the worst looking women I would argue it also attracts the very best bar none. Look at the film actresses, almost everyone is eccentric and weird in their personality and brain chemistry. Many girls into theatre and music were shunned socially yet objectively from a symmetry and body standpoint were way hotter than the sorority types.
            Unless you are a model then relying on looks is beyond dumb and even more retarded is sitting there wishing that God would rewrite your genetic code to make you Brad Pitt and thinking that looks are everything. We are talking about guys here. Looks are everything for MEN. WTF?????

         8. Did you read my posts earlier? I have a lot going for myself. I am probably going to have my own business by 30 in sports medicine. I have over 50K saved up at age 22 and am already investing my money. But you seem to miss the point that a girl doesn’t give a fuck about any of that if you don’t MEET HER LOOKS THRESHOLD.
            Don’t know what planet you live on, but hot guys are perceived as interesting right off the bat and will continue to be so without every doing anything. Meanwhile, I can be the most interesting fuck in the world but girls will not care because I don’t meet there threshold. And who says I am boring? Do you know anything about me personally? No. Just because I am posting the importance of looks, everyone seems to think I have some sort of problem. Like I said, I am already very accomplished at age 22 but girls from 18-24 don’t give a fuck about that. They want to have fun with hot studs. Also, read the literature. Women want looks as much as men. so many studies prove this

   5. Bullshit, Karl. A man’s “looks” includes his face, but also about 100 other factors, some of which are so tiny they get overlooked very easily. Hair, clothes, posture, physique, mannerisms, VOICE (a hugely important factor), diction, timing, mood, habits, etc.
      We give off hundreds or thousands of these little micro-signals every minute.
      I’d rather have an average face and be 6’3″. I have pulled some great pussy, and gone through some long dry spells, all because of my behavior. My face never changed over that period. My attitude did.
      Your frustration arises from your bad attitude and your age. As your target women exit college, they’ll change instantly, and care about behavior more than looks.

      1. I am aware of this. But face is the most important. Studies show this. I have all those in check. Who says I am frustrated? I am aware of the reality. Most guys in college think they can pull any ass they want…but they always fail. I am content knowing that I am awaken to the reality of the game and I am not delusional about it. People on this site seem to be though.

         1. I don’t believe you dude. You’re just too young and probably take girls’ token rejections too seriously. If the girls are not rejecting you by saying “you’re an ugly mofo”, then you’re not trying hard enough or you’re doing something else very wrong. I’ve seen too many hot chicks sleeping with ugly faced dudes to believe you.

         2. What don’t you believe? I never said I was ugly. I’m just not attractive, which is what women desire. Highly doubt you see “ugly dudes” pull super hot chicks. A male 4 has never pulled a female 8-9 without any money or fame compensation. Sorry, but nothing is done wrong on my end. Approaching is the easiest thing in the world the girl has given you the eyes (eye contact of 2 seconds at a club/bar/street). “Hey how’s it going?” No witty bull shit is needed. It’s basic shit from there. The real players know this. They look for eye contact and the rest is history. Thats how I run my game, but not being attractive means I’m scouting the averages.
            I don’t see what my age has to do with this lol. You can’t build attraction through “trying harder.” Its either there or not…and it comes from looks. This is science…

         3. I really think that if everything you are saying about yourself is true them it must be something about your approach. You must be saying or doing something that creeps the ladies out. It’s too damn bad nobody on this forum can see clips of you in action. I’m willing to bet there’s something you’re doing that would leap right out at an observer.

   6. Height has as much or more to do with it than facial looks.

      1. Only if you are not good looking. One of my best friends literally looks like a GQ male model. He is 5.8 and has slammed over 100 girls. Yes, if you are average and short, it is worse then being tall and average. But if you are good looking (I mean objectively good looking), height will not matter a huge deal

   7. I’m a totally average looking guy, baby faced, can’t grow facial hair, with serious approach anxiety but all my GFs have been 7-8s. Admittedly I don’t pull them at bars or do a traditional PUA approach, but it’s TOTALLY possible to be average or below and have sex with hot girls.

      1. You look pretty good to me in that photo

7. Sad to admit, this is what stopped me from going out this weekend. Solid, non-stop, blowing up in my face, rejections for the past 2 weeks straight. I figured, if it’s going to happen anyways, I might as well stay home and at least save some money…

   1. Don’t waste money on booze. Go to bars with no cover or clubs with minimal cover. Also, hate to say it, but if your getting rejected non-stop it is probably due to your looks mate. We all have a level we operate it. We cannot go above it by more then 1 unless we have some sort of status or money. This is the ultimate red pill…and no one on this site has ever mentioned it…

8. >Because without failure, success would not be meaningful. If you went through life, and never failed at anything – how boring would life be?
   >If you took home every girl you approached – that would be awesome, right? No, that would suck and you would find no gratification whatsoever in the process.
   You’re way off the mark.

9. How do you not get any bites when you approach 10-20 girls?? I just don’t get it.
   Anyway, some of the funnest (and most educational) nights out have been those with spectacular blowouts and rejections. I remember one night my wing and I played “persistence” and one girl I persisted on literally screamed at me “Fuck Off!!” so loud that my buddy at the other end of the bar heard it. It was fantastic.
   This fear of rejection really is irrational. Almost all the approaches I feared doing (which was almost all of them) either resulted in success or an “easy” rejection. I remember when I saw Vitaly’s “Put your number in my phone” video on Youtube that someone posted here on ROK, and thought “that can’t possible work.” So I decided to try it that night and three of the four girls I did it on gave their number. I realized that night that I had a lot to learn and that rejection was not going to be as bad as this big monster I had built up in my head.

   1. Speaking of funny and amazing games – when I was younger, me and my friends used to play the “See who will get rejected the most throughout the night” when out in town.
      Game rules:
      Players:- works best between 3-6 males that went out as a group.
      Rules: Once in a large venue, break apart and approach girls with the intention to get rejected – spew awful lines, make fun of them, come on to them wayyyy to strong or pretend to be very socially awkward – anything goes, as long as they say “No/Ew, Go Away/Fuck Off”.
      If there is no more fresh girls, go find some new ones in another venue.
      The sheer confidence when your goal IS to get rejected would cause you to have an amazing attitude, which ends up attracting girls (sometimes leading to girls who get the hang of what you are doing to approach you themselves). Not sure how this would work in US, but this would definitely get a lot of laughs and stories in the worst case scenario, with the most predictable outcome being an ONS.

   2. It works cause your being dominate! The whole asking for her number rarely works (beta). I usually give her my phone and tell her to put her number in (alpha). Works 80%+ of the time from my experience!

10. It took me quite a time to really embrace rejection and to see it as a positive thing, which it absolutely is. But for me embracing rejection goes way beyond the area of seducing women or game. In life in general, in relationships, in business, in studies… you should learn to accept and to embrace rejection and failure in all those parts of your life.
    Take a successful business man as an example. No successful person I have ever met said to me: “Yeah, I just started this thing, I didn’t make any mistakes and I haven’t failed one time.” No! The all say more something like this: “I started my business and I failed a hell of a lot, I made many mistakes and I got rejected a lot but I learned from my mistakes and I learned to deal with rejection and to accept it as a part of success. Eventually I figured things out in the end and became successful.”
    This was actually something a successful person told me when I asked him to describe his journey. That’s why I am willing to fail a lot, get rejected a lot and try again and again…

11. Any good salesman will tell you that every sale, even the tremendously successful ones, should end with a ‘no’.

12. The problem with game, if it relies on some sort of semi spam approaching..(im not a game denialist, just pointing out an obvious problem)
    Lets says everyone learns it and do it.
    1 At this time a girls entitlement and princess complex, lets call it X, is at 1
    2 Everyone approaches every girl 30*X times a night.
    3 Every girl gets approached 100 * X times a night.
    4) Her expectation of any man is now his game_skills*how_handsome_he_is*his_social_status*X
    4 After two week of this..X=X+1
    5 Go to 2

13. The exact same philosophy works in entrepreneurship!

    1. True, unless it breaks your bank.

14. In my blue pill days, I didn’t comprehend how wonderful rejection is.
    I would make a clumsy approach, get shot down and feel shitty afterwards.
    But now I know something: the girl wasn’t attracted to me, isn’t attracted to me, and will never be so.
    This means that the girl has no power over me anymore. No matter how hot she is, how flirty, how provacative she is in the future, she is nothing but trouble for me.
    I wolnt have a problem telling her to fuck off.
    By eliminating the women who aren’t for me, I can ignore them and find the girls who are right for me. Filtering out girls is one of the most important steps you can take in game.

15. Rejection isn’t so bad if there’s a success now and then. But it’s rough when it’s nothing but rejection. It’s hard to keep up the slog, it starts to seem really pointless after a while.

16. Why is everything in the manosphere about women?

17. Rejection is great. One of the best ways to learn.
    Just make sure you build a big enough purse (real friends, outside interests that require sacrifice and build self esteem, real career, etc…) so that you can afford the blows to your ego that it causes. Without that, it will start to have bad effects.
    Also, pick your battlefield wisely. Rejection in Toronto or Copenhagen will grind you down pretty quickly. Rejection in more favorable cities won’t

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19. It’s not just about your face bro. Voice tonality has a huge impact. Use down tone when talking to chicks. It makes a huge difference. Most likely you are speaking in up tone.

    1. Body language is about 70%, tone 20% and what u say 10%. Move/walk with confidence even if u dont have yet!

20. If a chick rejects you demolish her ego chances are it is overinflated

    1. If she rejects u, reject her back ‘that’s cool, u aren’t my type anyhow.’ girls take rejection more personally where it leads to making u look more attractive! Walk away and move onto the next girl and have a good time… She will watch u and might even try to get into your path so u will talk to her again! My old game was this if I was getting the cold treatment “I thought u were my type when I saw u across the room but your’re not, have a good night! *smile and than walk away. * I reckon about 50% of the time she made an effort to talk to me afterwards due to it turning the game around!

21. The reason why we feel pain from rejection is primal. If u were living with your tribe and they rejected u, it would greatly improve your chances of death if u were in the wild by yourself without support of your tribe! Today we have no need for it… After a while u end up getting use to it and it doesn’t hurt anymore!

22. I accept rejection but I will never embrace it.
    Lust rejects what love embraces….
    A couple of my quotes on rejection. Why quotes because women are more right brained then men despite what people here might think. The women crave the masculine alpha male because he allows them to be comfortable with their own repressed femininity…

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