As I mentioned earlier this week in one of my tweets, I started reading The Rational Male’s new book (which I am very much enjoying so far). Early on he describes the value and benefits of what he refers to as “competition anxiety” by females. Rollo states that it is one of the more powerful tools a man can have, and based on experience I fully agree.
In Theory
The book does a great job of breaking this down. Essentially, the idea is that if a girl believes another girl may “get” you in whatever sense that may be—sex, relationship, wife and so on—she will subconsciously be more attracted to you. We’ve all heard many variations of this. For example, how sometimes married men are deemed more desirable or how showing up with a girl at a bar makes it easier to attract more girls (girls attract girls). It is somewhat a form of irrational jealousy at its root—a girl wants what she doesn’t have simply because another girl has it.
In Practice
A few of my own life experiences clearly substantiate this theory:
The Roommate: Two years ago or so I had just came back from a long trip to Europe and needed a room to crash in until my next trip. Two girls I found online were looking for a third roommate. The place was big, the girls were cool, the location was prime and the price was right. I specifically recall actually turning on some game principles to make sure they wanted me in there as the roommate, and it worked.
The first night I was there I went out with some buddies and got drunk. I never made it home but slept on my buddy’s couch. The girls however thought I went home with a girl. When they asked me about it, I just smiled, didn’t answer and went in my room. The next night I had a date with a girl, as I did the following two nights with different girls. One I brought back.
Within the first week, one of the roommates essentially threw herself at me and we hooked up (bad idea on its own, but nonetheless proves this immediate point). The other one had a boyfriend and kept requesting to see my penis and asking me if I was some sort of sex god. I barely even spoke to these girls during that first week—it was all a result of their perception that other girls want me.
Ukraine: I alluded to this during Roosh’s interview with me about my Eastern Europe trip this past summer. In Ukraine and Russia, girls are highly competitive and jealous. Some of the stories are stated here so I won’t repeat them. But it happened frequently. The same virgin I mention in that story I parlayed into another bang when a girl who did not respond to my texts saw me out with her, and then literally waited until almost 5am until that one went home to jump in a cab with me. Other girls who blew me off would come back and talk to me after seeing me chat with other girls.
My iPhone: As terrible as this invention has been for dating culture, I’ve found a way to utilize it for some good. Last year a girl sent me a text during the date and I had accidentally left my phone out. My date saw the text and kept asking me who “Yulia” was and she got noticeably warmer towards me after that incident. My brain started working and realizing the effect this had, I started implementing a variation of this.
I don’t blatantly leave my phone out like that date but tweaked the strategy to be a bit more subtle. Contrary to popular opinion I usually try to show up to my dates earlier than the girl for a number of reasons. While waiting for her, I’ll take that time to send out numerous texts to people I owe responses to, to girls I need to follow up with, to coworkers, friends, etc.
I put my phone in my pocket and start the date. After about an hour or so, I will be talking about something that requires a photo to better understand the story. Naturally I will need my phone to show the photo, so I pull my phone out and almost every time I will have several texts waiting for me in response to the texts I sent out before she arrived. On the iPhone, these show up on the home screen and since most girls are text whores themselves they know what those green little icons mean.
A minor but calculated tactic, it leads to the predictable response from the girl of “oh Mr. Popular!” or something along those lines, which I ignore and proceed to the photo I was showing. The seed however has been planted and whether true or not, she now believes there are other people, and more importantly girls, trying to contact me.
In Conclusion
There are many, many tools in one’s game that leads to continued success. This is a small, yet very effective one. The key however is to be subtle and indirect. If you start bragging about how many dates you have lined up or girls you are banging, it will come across as blowhard and insecure. The less you speak and the more she sees, the better off you are.
Read Next: Give Her Tingles, Not Torture: Erica’s Story
All girls are attracted to pre-selection, nice article.
anyone who’s ever read up about game knows about social proof and its benefits. this article may interest some newbies, but other than that..meh.
you can do better Law Dog, your exposes on EE were the shit!
I have something in the works on the EE adventures. Stay tuned.
Very true. Something similar happened to me just this weekend. Me and a girl I never met in person (not yet anyway) exchanged a couple of vaguely flirtatious comments on farcebook. The girl I’m seeing regularly saw them and made some remarks about them, which I laughed off. The day after she shows up at my place dressed sexier than ever and gives me the lay of a lifetime. Her eagerness to please was amazing. Definitely something to learn how to use with subtlety and finesse..haha.
I always wondered why this doesn’t work the other way round (on men). would someone mind explaining?
My exie has a new boyfriend. Am I filled with jealousy and lust for her? No.
Instead, I feel pity…for him! 😀
An attractive woman can practically go on the street and find a guy who’d fuck her in 10 seconds. Why should men be impressed by that? On the other hand, a dude that gets lots of girls must at least seem high value, so the woman can guess that he is a good catch.
A lock that like to be fumbled with wants a key that has proven it’s effectiveness on other locks.
A key that likes fumbling with locks does not want to first dig in the grease of the previous keys.
And yea, the gatekeeper analogy. A bard opening many gates is a good bard, a gate opening to many bards, is a common passageway.
also would you like to dip your dick into another man’s pool of semen, like it’s designed to do.
Somethings cannot be controlled (ala Leykis), but willingly playing the cum spade is not in my best entertainment.
Maybe because physical attractiveness is basically all the proofing, and the only kind of proofing, a man needs and has ever needed? (I kid ..somewhat.)
I think it’s easy to demonstrate men are prone to influence to the same basic thing being highlighted here (having attraction to a person be positively impacted by how they’re coveted by one’s respective gender), but it just not showing in a directly identical way as it shows with women (because women’s process of sexual attraction tends to value things differently than a man’s; factoring more into that equation things like confidence, gregariousness, and less won over by physical appearance alone).
Men sometimes talk about enjoying the challenge of getting a
woman who is hard to get (as oppose to easy and loose), and we know men have trophy wives and girlfriends, and
brag about having sex with hot women.. why? How can it not be because men know these women are highly coveted by other men?
I don’t have the psychological studies at hand to back it up, but through life experience I would say men are prone to suggestion in regards to their level of attraction to a woman. If a man’s social circle all thinks a woman is attractive, he is prone to start regarding her higher than if not.
If there is an intense depression and suicide inducing level of fear towards not being attracted to what most men are attracted to (towards being gay), there then by the other side of the coin is an internal pressure and drive for men to want to associate themselves with what they see other men find acceptable to be sexually attracted to.
Switching things here a little: on OkCupid browsing profiles you can see the frequency a
woman responds to messages rated from “often” to “very selectively”, with women who are getting inundated with messages always having a “very selective” degree of response.
I’ve noticed overtime I’ve come to question and think less almost
unconsciously (albeit only a bit) of a woman who “replies often”, like
them perhaps being not as cool, something being slightly suspect, or
maybe more desperate. I’ve heard other men speak similar things to this.
Also, if we were to ask men “Would you rather date a woman who was insecure and had no friends
..versus one that had a rich social network and did things with people often?” I think we can easily say a majority would say the
latter.
Yo Law Dogger, you jealous of my ROK article cover pic?
Preselection game recognized.
Touché my fellow ROK’er. Touché .
Good Advice!
It is important to remember that when dealing with women, especially those sired in America, you are dealing with a simple creature than can barely handle more than the most basic Pavlovian response.
so true, a man’s biggest mistake towards women is to treat them like other men.
Hmmm, maybe I should hire a hot escort for a night, and if I don’t catch any skin that way, I can just fuck the slut I paid for. C&C seems to be the best game: Confidence and Ca$h.
Hear, hear.
Becoming more popular after females realize that they have to compete for a male’s attention is a well known phenomenon, known as mate choice copying, that occurs throughout the animal kingdom – it has been reported in mammals, birds, fish and even fruit flies. So it either evolved in parallel or it can be traced back to an early ancestor that is shared by insects and mammals. Either way, use this ancient force for your own benefit gentlemen.
this is so fucking true, i’ve seen it happen right in front of my eyes countless times
The first time this happened to me was in college. I magically transformed from a nobody to Mr. Dream Man in the eyes of some women in my dorm after I started dating a good looking woman who lived off campus. One of them basically threw herself at me one night. And since then, the power has been proven true countless times.
It’s also important to remember that it’s not only jealousy driving women, it is social proof. Women see that other women are willing to invest time and attention into you, so if she is then able to get your attention that makes her feel like she’s higher in girl status.
I know I’m preaching to the choir, but this is one of the main reasons why it’s so important to never put all your eggs in one basket with one girl. Even if you really like her, she needs to feel that you have other options or she will lose attraction. And if you’re not so thrilled with one girl you may be seeing, you can still use her attraction to you to parlay new prospects.
If this seems manipulative, it may be. But women are mercenaries at using social convention in their favor. Go and do likewise.
“Go and do likewise, gents. The pussy is out there, you take it it’s yours, you don’t I got no sympathy for you. You wanna go out there on those sits tonight and close .. CLOSE, it’s yours, not then you’ll be shining my shoes!” (with thanks to Mr Alec Baldwin).
great way to publicize more shitty e-books and products, good job
I like this ! THIS is game, unlike the drone mass approaching !
All too true. I have found out a version of this that is even more sad.
Cute checker at supermarket who never paid much attention to me asked the pro forma “how’s it going?” and I said,
“It would be fine if these women would just leave me alone some of the time.”
From then on, whenever I came in, she was all smiles and flirts and semi hypno staring at me.
Yes, that’s right, you can create social proof without any actual women around or pictures or texts on your iphone.
You can use words alone, and if you say it like it is true, she will believe it. I was waiting for her to say, “Yeah right.” but I must have said it with conviction because she bought it.
Lazy man’s version.
Too true.
I have a friend who plugged his own phone number into his iPhone under a girl’s name. He’ll text himself something illicit, like, “What’re you doing later tonght? :)”, excuse himself, and leave the phone on the table. The text comes up about a minute after he sets it down. The girl he’s with, always curious, always looks, always gets jealous, always assumes value.
Yeah, it’s manipulative, but like the post says…women are more manipulative than you could ever hope to be.
Good ol’ preselection. Works like gangbusters.
Sexy Son Hypothesis in action is in my experience the BEST tool a guy can utilize. Time and time again, I have noticed that this is the single most effective way to attract women. It’s gotta be the most predominant hardwiring girls have when it comes to attraction, and this makes sense from an evolutionary perspective.
Snake in the grass move:
Change a few best mate’s name to a girls name, fill him in on the plan and shoot him a couple of texts while you’re out with a girl.
I’ve never been the sort of man to “force” preselects on (except when a girl starts talking to another guy, I one-up the bitch), but if I did, this is what I would do.
Very true. One tactic that can be particularly effective is the use of wingwomen.
Can we have your e-mail, Law Dogger?
treat girls like public library books…
peruse the library for a book you fancy, checkout the book from the library, read the book on the beach, take the book out on a trip, share the story with a friend.
once you are done reading the book, return her to the public library for another man to take out that book.
now if all men did that we can have a round table and discuss past books with our eskimo brothers..
Definitely one of the most reliable game principles. Good post!
yes this does work on loads of occasions its just women’s natural instinct lol a 8 years back I was having a rough patch(see beta as fuck) n being financially good at the time would meet agency chicks lol, now the 1st I met blew my mind she was nice sexy and good in bed but like most girls in that profession had issues so would be hot and cold. I would see her maybe once every two months and we got on well she would let me stay over for free(no extra sex)(well unless we went out and drunk and I flirted with another girl) would take me out for drinks and pay but obviously this was after I booked her
never out of the blue.
anyway she started to act more and more like a gf with more talking and bitching and less sex(even after I payed) so I gradually decided this wasn’t the life I wanted. the next time I was In need I asked the agency to see another girl who lived the same town as this one. I get there this girl refuses to see me as I look young(more then likely cos im Asian) and intimidating(like I said I was beta so I doubt it). still horny the agency try to rectify the situation they phone the nearest girl ie my original agency girl,
I turn up she’s looks slightly put out I wonder what the agency lady told her then she comes out with “why would you wanna see another girl”????????? looking pissed I stutter that I was told you were busy she says nothing looks at me and says men are never satisfied , I ask if she’s jealous and she says “not jealous just erm”(it written all over her face) before pushing me onto the bed and sexed me like my wife does now after we have make up sex lol. she asked me to stay over that night and I think between 9pm and 9am I slept 2 hours bere in mind ive only payed for 1 hour
she gone back to her country now and retired we still speak now and then via email but we both have families now
Wimmen want a man other wimmen want…
One word distinguishes modern women from the classical (i.e. ideal) model of what a woman should be: Ambition. Simply put, these bitches play for first place with absolutely no regard for cost or consequences because they have no intentions on losing.
Envy is nature’s strongest aphrodisiac and @Law_Dogger:disqus’s post is a great introduction to using Hegelian Dialectic as a method for scoring women. It goes as follows:
Create a problem.
Allow a conflict to happen.
Administer your predetermined resolution.
For clarity and context, a more practical example would be:
Step 1. Introduce ‘Girl B’ as an antagonist (Your manufactured threat to ‘Girl A’)
Step 2. This will elicit the desired reaction from ‘Girl A’ (Envy)
Step 3. Grant ‘Girl A’ an opportunity to recapture your affections (i.e. Fuck your brains out)
« Fin »
I stumbled across this technique in college when a girl I was seeing (Girl A) stopped returning my calls. How did I respond? By taking a leggy, blonde (Girl B aka the Problem) with big, soft Triple D’s you could bury your face in on a date to a restaurant I knew she frequented. Thus creating my conflict.
Girl A’s reaction?
Making out with me at my corner table when the blonde went to the bathroom.
I nailed Girl B that night, Girl A called me the next morning to throw me the cat that afternoon. I kept them both on my roster for the duration of the summer but let Girl A play on the B Team for forcing me behave in a less than gentlemanly manner.
I reserve this method for women who have a tendency to be flaky, fickle or particularly apathetic and it works best if you’ve already created a physical rapport.
This was another good one RoK. You took me back to my ‘Cruel to be Kind’ years. I’m surprised no one has done a post on the D.E.N.N.I.S. System from ‘It’s Always Sunny’ The two usually work pretty well in tandem.
“The less you speak and the more she sees, the better off you are.” Solid advice in many areas of life…