The Most Important Trait That Leads To Male Success


Whether your aim is to get laid, get fit or start your own business, the single most important trait you should strive to develop is consistency. Not only is consistency the key to success in every area of your life, but it is also one of the core elements of masculinity.

First, let me set out precisely what I mean by consistency and what I don’t. The dictionary definition the word the way I’m using it is as follows:

A steadfast adherence to the same principles, course, form.

‘Principles, course, form’—results, you notice, are not mentioned. This is absolutely key. You need to be consistent in your actions. Results will follow, but in their own time. You can’t force them. Your focus should always be solely on putting in right action every day—that is, consistently carrying out the same actions in pursuit of a clearly defined end goal. What you shouldn’t do is try to jump straight to the goal itself. This is counterproductive, and any success you do happen to achieve will be short term and illusory, built on flimsy foundations.

When men come to ROK and other manosphere sites, it is often because they are unhappy with some element of their lives, frequently their success with women. Here they discover a community of guys who are interested in self-development and are actively working to improve themselves. Excited and inspired, the less consistent will join expensive gyms and hit them up for a month or so, or they go out and approach three or four women before giving up and returning to the comfort zone of their bedrooms. There, despondent, they will rationalize that game doesn’t work, or self-development doesn’t work or isn’t for them, before sinking into a depression even lower than before. This, of course, is fundamentally the wrong way to approach anything.


In part, this pattern is undoubtedly due to cultural influences. We are now inundated with articles on how the internet has an adverse effect on our concentration spans. Whether or not you buy this is up to you (I’m personally ambivalent), but coupled with an emphasis on quick and easy fame and ‘success’ through reality TV and cheap celebrity, it is undeniable that the message being sent out is that you don’t have to work hard or consistently to achieve your goals. This, of course, is entirely false. In fact, the formula for success in any endeavor is as follows:

Consistency + momentum = success

And the good news? Consistency itself creates momentum. But you need to put the work in.

Let’s take meeting women as an example. If your aim is to improve your sex life—perhaps to meet multiple women or to find a girlfriend—then take a minute to work out how many women you have approached this week. Many, some, or none? Perhaps you alternate between a high number of approaches on the weekend, and none during the week. Or perhaps you steeled yourself to make that one big daygame approach and it went badly, so then you retreated into yourself, afraid to try again.

If you want to get really good with women, and achieve a lasting skill set, then you should make your habits here consistent. Decide on a realistic number of girls you can hit on per day—Roosh has a great post here about making one approach a day—and sticking to it. Start a spreadsheet recording each girl’s name, the date of the approach, her contact details (if you get them), a description of her and a brief note on how the encounter went. Not only will this help you keep track of your various prospects, but it will also spur you on. Because every time you approach, regardless of how it goes, you know that you can fill in another row on your spreadsheet. Make that the goal, rather than pulling the girl. Why? Because the best way to achieve consistency is to learn to love the process and to let go of the result.


When you operate with this mindset you will find that slowly, over time, you will make incremental gains. Some of your approaches may be horrible—you might say something stupid, or not open strongly enough and have the girl ignore you. It doesn’t matter—log it on your spreadsheet anyway, and go on to the next one. You will start to feel great satisfaction in watching the sheet fill up and knowing that you are working hard to better yourself, regardless of  your results. This will strengthen your habit of consistency. Over time you will see your interactions improve exponentially. And time in the trenches is very important. Andrew Robinson, author of Sudden Genius? The Gradual Path to Creative Breakthroughs writes:  

Psychologist John Hayes in 1989 [discovered a rule] soon endorsed by other psychologists . . . that a person must persevere with learning and practicing a craft or discipline for about 10 years before he or she can make a breakthrough. Remarkably few breakthroughs have been achieved in less than this time.

Einstein’s first insights into relativity were in 1895, ten years before his Theory was published in 1905. Stravinsky’s The Rite of Spring was written in 1912, a decade after his apprenticeship to Rimsky-Korsakov in 1902. Picasso’s Les Demoiselles d’Avignon appeared in 1907, ten years after he began training as an artist in Barcelona. This is not to suggest that it will take you ten years to get laid with a cute girl — far from it. But genuine mastery in any discipline takes real time, effort and application.

For a contemporary sporting example, look at the way Kobe Bryant trains. Kobe has won 5 NBA championships, 2 Olympic Gold Medals and he has a net worth of over $200 million. How did he attain this impressive level of success? Through consistent, focused practice. According to one trainer, he would begin conditioning work at 4:30am, run and sprint until 6am, lift weights from 6am – 7am and then make 800 jumps shots between 7am and 11am—all before official Team USA practice!

If this sound intimidating then that is entirely understandable, but realize at the same time that it is Kobe’s near-crazy work ethic and consistency that has put him where he is today. Don’t let stories about hard work put you off—if anything they should inspire you. Why? Because you can work hard too. Mark Cuban, billionaire owner of the Dallas Mavericks has this to say:

In sports, the only thing a player can truly control is effort. The same applies to business. The only thing any entrepreneur, salesperson or anyone in any position can control is their effort.

The same goes for meeting women, getting jacked in the gym, becoming a better writer or any other endeavor you can think of.  And the way to maximize the effort you make is to consistently put in the right action on a daily basis.

Last year I wrote a novel. Every morning I would get up at 5am before work and write for 90 minutes before showering, putting on my suit and heading off to into the corporate wasteland. I would also write in the evening and at weekends. Some writing sessions were terrible. My prose would sound cliched, stilted and lifeless. No matter—I just kept tapping away at the keyboard, filling up pages with words. My only aim was to get to the end. Finally I finished. I read it back—I had a novel that contained some terrible passages, some okay passages and a few that I as very happy with. A long period of editing and rewriting fixed the flaws and, while it’s still work in progress, I now have a book that I’m proud of. But it didn’t happen overnight—it was born out daily work which created incremental improvements over a long period of time.


Visualize whatever it is you want to achieve then work out how you’re going to get there. Break the process down into small chunks and then do something every day that will get you a little closer to your goal.  Don’t think too much about the endgame—simply congratulate yourself on taking action today. After a while you will find that you are building up momentum and that you are enjoying the process.

If you have a bad day—say you get rejected by everyone in the club — then so what? Don’t sweat it. You’re doing this every day. There will be natural peaks and troughs. Tomorrow may be better. Keep going no matter what. In time you will see your technique improve. Perhaps your conversations with girls will last longer or you will start getting make-outs, phone numbers or the occasional bang. These successes will spur you on and encourage you to take more action. You will enter a virtuous cycle. Most importantly, you will start to feel that true inner contentment and happiness that comes from working on getting good at something that is important to you, rather than the shallow, illusory happiness that is offered to us by modern culture.

You can find out more about how consistency will help you to attract beautiful women by clicking here.

 Read More: The Importance Of Cultivating A Killer Instinct

52 thoughts on “The Most Important Trait That Leads To Male Success”

  1. The best advice in the world. Let me tell you something I figured out at age 32.
    What I found out was that if I gave say 150 percent effort to some goal, the expectations of the results never meets reality. You can achieve 90 percent of your results, but still think you are at less than half that.
    But perseverance, even when you give less than 100 percent, will work EVERY time.
    In practice, this has worked well for me. I went from not being able to shoot a pistol to a wall full of trophies in 18 months, not by being a freak watching videos and shooting 1000s of rounds per month, just by showing up to monthly matches and paying attention, smooth and easy. I have restored rust-bucket cars in 1 fifth of the time it takes some married “never gets time for it” beta can, just because not matter how little time I had for the project, I still put time into it. Even if all I had was 30 minutes after work to go to the garage instead of find a couch, then that’s what I did.
    Since I was around 17 I made it a point to stay in shape and I’m over 40 now and can wear the same sized clothes I wore when I was 17. I don’t spend all afternoon in the gym every day. Heck less than an hour of simple stuff – I don’t even own weights. The things I do now are practically old lady stuff compared to what I used to do.
    There are scores of other things I apply this to, and it’s true: be consistent. Print this article out and put it up on your walls.

    1. One low-tech way I’ve found of making consistency a habit is creating a PDF calendar with my activity/goal at the top of the calendar (eg. lifting, running, etc.) and putting a check-mark in each day’s box when I do that activity. The goal then is to make sure every day has a check-mark in it. I put the calendar on my bedside where I’ll see it every morning. It keeps you accountable.

  2. Exactly, and this goes with everything. To be consistent you have to constantly challenge yourself, push through boundaries, and then eventually it all just becomes habit.
    If you have a goal to increase your long distance cardio, you have to set a strict plan to follow through, push through the bad days, and eventually it will become second nature to you.

  3. The most important thing is trying and trying and trying and laughing at failure.
    If you have the humility to find your own failures quite the comedy, even if it’s in danger of making you homeless then you have a platform to work from.
    Then of course you have to look at what is causing the failures and begin to change those errors – that is the hard part.

  4. This has been known for thousands of years. It’s one of the Four Cardinal Virtues: Courage, Confidence, Persistence, Not Giving Up.

  5. Great post! This applies to everything in life; from dating, marriage, work and friendship.

    1. Not true:
      “Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan Press On! has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race.”
      ― Calvin Coolidge

  6. the 4 rules
    1) patience
    2)knowledge of the game
    3) sense of urgency/ timing
    4)Willingness to make sacrifices
    Those are the 4 noble truths of chess^ and winning in any strategy in life , the practicing mind is a good book to read as well, as it goes into momentum based motivational theories,

  7. is revolutionizing my life. It’s always good reading good blogs archives

  8. Troy Francis, I look forward to reading more of your work. This article is golden.

  9. Good article and something I need to work on. I waste away too much time on the computer. While reading and learning a lot is good, it does not really get me anywhere.

  10. Fuck yea, love reading these articles that talk about ways to be successful. On the grind myself, and it’s always a little help. Just remember though, those who read can also be the laziest since you end up just reading and reading and not taking any action on your goals.

  11. I’m consistently working towards becoming the best Hearthstone player in the world!

  12. ‘Being consistant and having a breakthrough may take 10 years’ IS TRUE. I reminisce back to ’84, my first go at clubbing. Standing by the women’s bathroom door greeting everyone with ”Hi, my name’s Jim . . JUNGLE JIM . . wanna swing?” I must have tried that line 50 times that night. Hey I was only 20 ok! Having had crappy social in high school I had plenty available memory space to fill with pua and the term ‘red pill’ didn’t exist. ‘Where there’s wool, there’s a way” I’d tell myself. (pussies were all hairy back then). No ROK, no internet, no coach, just me and sometimes a buddy. I’d get tanked the first hour in club, then it was on. Openings got better and way better but couldn’t close. Six months later first kosher lay from club to my parents garage. TRUE it was a good 10 years later before a steady who was pregnant and a fair place of our own. Then two and three. Roll foreward another 10 years and we’re under attack, betrayed by a trusted logal mangina clergy, a high IQ gobbler of PC shit who rose to federal prominence as a legal ‘scholar’ and pusher and preacher of blue pill. If red pill were force fed in academia like blue, the masses of shit gobblers and retainers and unthinking bubble test geniuses would skew the curve, making at best only facism of only the worst of red. Red must truly mature from one’s own journey, self taught. My first ‘awakening’ in ’80 I simply screamed an eternal ‘nooooo’ at the bull, the brainwashing, the unlevel playing field with bitches, but it was a good year before I could put it into convincing words for others. A self declaration and self journey gives one the KEY to the idea’s origin, thus making you an instant TEACHER of what you discover. If that’s what red pill is, when I cried ‘no’ to the pink slime being forced into my brain in public school, it sure made me a thinker and philosopher and able to articulate. I sense that extra senses are activated and unused parts of the brain open up when you throw out the SHIT ! !

    1. Actually this is a perfect example of what NOT to do.
      You wasted TEN years of your life, probably more.
      Again, if the end game was enjoying women.
      There’s a blogger who interviews the top PUA’s and other assorted ‘men’s lifestyle/cool guy” gurus on his podcast.
      As you might guess, most of the PUA’s are full of it.
      But, one time he had on a male stripper who actually DID get girls….ALL the time.
      Yeah, there’s SOME issues with that paradigm, and his methods are not necessarily dispositive. Nonetheless, this guy was not talking theory but substantive reality.
      He said that, when it came to getting with girls. 90% of the guys scramble for the CRUMBS that the other 10% of guys get.
      All you were doing was practicing and getting consistent at being part of the 90%.
      You could have started on Day one practicing and getting consistent at being part of the 10%.
      I don’t mean to be reductive, but that’s why JUST preaching flat land “consistently” is a fail from the jump.
      Well, at least 90% of the time.

    2. Nothing personal, but this is a perfect example of what NOT to do.
      You wasted TEN years of your life, probably more.
      Again, if the end game was enjoying women.
      There’s a blogger who interviews the top PUA’s and other assorted ‘men’s lifestyle/cool guy” gurus on his podcast.
      As you might guess, most of the PUA’s are full of it.
      But, one time he had on a male stripper who actually DID get girls….ALL the time.
      Yeah, there’s SOME issues with that paradigm, and his methods are not necessarily dispositive. Nonetheless, this guy was not talking theory, but substantive reality.
      One thing he said that bears repeating – When it came to getting girls, 10% of guys get hot ones easily and consistently, while the other 90% scramble for the CRUMBS that the 10% leave behind.
      All you were doing was getting consistent at being part of the 90%.
      You could have started on Day One practicing and getting consistent at being part of the 10%. But, you must first start with a revelation.
      I don’t mean to sound reductive, but that’s why JUST preaching flat land “consistency” is a fail from the jump.
      Well, at least 90% of the time.

      1. There’s a lot of talk lately of ‘awakening’ or ‘waking up’ and ‘red pill’. I liken it to the phenomenon of ‘born again’. A supressed mind purging self defeating constructs fallacies and programming. My main point at the end I believe higher brainwave states or senses attuning occurs when I hear people say they ‘take’ this red pill. My old pua antics I’ll never forget ,though.I just had to tell that one.

        1. ‘born again’ – A supressed mind purging self defeating constructs fallacies and programming.”
          That’s not what being born again is about.
          But, anyway…
          People can talk all day long about taking the right COLORED pill, but what COLORS most of the posts I’ve read in here is a distinct sense of SCHADENFREUDE over women who used to be hot but can no longer get the guys they used to because they’re older.
          That is a sign of a BUTT HURT guy. And ROK is full of them.
          If you are stewing in self-satisfaction because girls who once rejected you are now being rejected, then you just don’t get it, son. You just don’t get it…
          God Girls Gold
          And yes, I nailed the spelling of SCHADENFREUDE without first having to look it up. But, I did look it up just to make sure. haha

      2. ‘When it came to getting girls, 10% of guys get hot ones easily and consistently, while the other 90% scramble for the CRUMBS that the 10% leave behind.’
        Hmmm. I suspect these figures were plucked out of the air. Where’s his evidence?

        1. Evidence?
          Obviously, it’s just a guess.
          Now, let me guess.
          Unless you have ‘science’ to back it up, you won’t believe it.
          Right? haha

        2. No of course not. But this theory is bandied about a lot on the internet. It came from a study on a college campus with about 50 students, I believe.
          In the real world you see all kinds of guys with cute girls – ugly guys, poor guys, skinny guys, nerdy guys – not just this mythical 10%.
          Anyway, even if it were true, what qualifies a guy as ‘top 10%’? And how do you define a ‘hot’ girl, given guys have diverse tastes.
          It’s just a bit woolly and meaningless for me.

        3. True, you SEE them with cute girls.
          But, how they got there is a another story.
          Plus, what YOU think is an ugly guy is not necessarily an ugly guy in the eyes of girls.
          That may be the BIGGEST misconception men that can’t get chicks have…

        4. I’m not arguing with you about the efficacy of game. We’re on the same side as far as that’s concerned. I buy what you’re saying, but I don’t buy the figures – they’re plucked out the air.
          I personally know guys who have no game and aren’t particularly good-looking etc. who have cute girlfriends. When you step away from manosphere sites this stuff is pretty common.
          My point is this ‘10% of guys’ thing is basically made up and distorts reality. Granted, game helps you get laid with more hot chicks than you would otherwise, but it doesn’t follow that hot chicks only hook up with those who know game. That is a logical fallacy.

        5. Yes, if you are willing to do certain things, almost anyone can get a cute girl….especially if you get them to believe you are a good long term catch. There are so many cute girls these days, there’s plenty to go around.
          And yes, the 10% number is pulled out of someone’s butt.
          But it was the butt of a hot ba that happened to be the FOURTH girl he got with that weekend! haha
          Don’t know if it’s a logical fallacy or not, but it doesn’t matter as I don’t assert that only guys with game get hot girls. We ALL know better.
          So, what have we learned….
          You DON’T need to be good looking (by almost ANY standard) to get a hot babe
          You DON’T need to have game to get a hot babe.
          You CERTAINLY DON’T need money to get a hot babe.
          Having said that, it’s better to be a good (enough) looking guy with lots of money and tons of game.
          Now… I’ve dropped a lot of wisdom on you.
          So, please have the courtesy of Liking out FB page – God! Girls!! Gold!

      3. ^Nothing personal, but you are a fucking retard.
        Your incomprehensible comments have led me to this revelation.
        why not just tl:dr them to: “I’m a whiny confused bitch”

        1. bahaha This guy was anally raw, BEFORE he read my post.
          It’s even worse now.
          The difference? The former case was literal.
          The latter? Figurative.
          PS Don’t worry, he won’t find this comment any more “comprehensible” than the last one!
          Be sure to check out my FB page – God! Girls!! Gold!

        2. lol FB is for losers like you. And your comments are still incomprehensible bullshit. Other than the anal reference, which shows what you really are thinking about, don’t it?

  13. “If you have a bad day—say you get rejected by everyone in the club – then so what? Don’t sweat it. ”
    Therein lies the conceit of this argument. You shouldn’t be going to clubs in the first place. And you shouldn’t be randomly approaching either. Not from Day one. Never. Not if you want to enjoy women, which is presumably the end game in this example.
    Consistency MINUS revelation can find you as the best pants folder at The Gap for years and years.
    It’s deeper than that, bro.
    God Girls Gold
    We have a lot more to say on this topic. Find us on Facebook at God! Girls!! Gold!

  14. Never give up! But also try to learn something. Learn from people who are better at it. Don’t do 3000 approaches with zero lays without reaching out to someone, because that learning curve is too slow.

  15. Thanks for the article. It is good, solid advice for anyone needing a little something that is ‘missing’ in their life.
    Be it a hobby, working out, etc….be consistent.

  16. “Nothing in this world can take the place
    of persistence. Talent will not: nothing is more common than
    unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is
    almost a proverb. Education will not: the world is full of educated
    derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent.”
    ~ Calvin Coolidg

  17. Kind of goes without saying. But, being able to control your desire and not let it control you is the #1 (underrated) trait to success, I have found.
    Not getting sidetracked by pussy or other distractions.
    Which I guess ties into the consistency thing…

  18. Since I enjoy throwing wrenches into various machines, I’ll do that here as well.
    “Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”
    – Albert Einstein

  19. I’m at a gym where the staff is trying to gradually take control of my workouts and trying to dominate me, and it is very uncomfortable and annoying; I also realize that they do not have my best interests in mind. It is a negative focus. They are trying to correct things which do not need correcting. They are intrusive. If a plate hits the bottom plate when I am done working out on a machine, one of the worthless pricks will rush over to instruct me not to do that again. The name of their game, besides trying to dominate and control, is an underlying game of: You will respect this gym! The reason behind this is the fact that the gym is a fat farm for the majority of it’s members. They leave the fat people to themselves. But they are maintaining a big focus and a lot of attention on my activity, trying to tell me the angle I should set a bench at, or trying to determine for me at what height I should set the chairs. And to remember to wipe the machines with a towel. Basically, they are ignorant and feel inferior, and there are other members in the gym who are jealous, envious and resentful. One man complained very loudly that he hates me to a bunch of guys who were working out around him. A woman had given an earlier bunch of guys a startled and urgent look, which pretty much said, “You guys are starting to look bad! You had better not let him get too far ahead of you!” These people cannot mind their own damn business and when someone came over and began a conversation, in no time at all I realized that he is just trying to pick up some clues, and any answer I provided, he took a condescending attitude towards. So, basically, there is a group that is forming to oppose me. At the same time, there are guys who look at me as if to say, “Do not listen to them! You know more than they do! Don’t let them fuck up your workout!” So, I need to tell the staff to go find some other project. They notice women checking me out. They notice looks being exchanged between the fit and attractive female gym members and the female staff. Obviously, there are guys in the gym and on the staff who see me as the guy they need to get rid of. It’s that plain and simple. I realize that I need to form some genuine friendships and soon, because in no time the haters will be gossiping about me to anyone and everyone, as a pre-emptive cock blocking measure. I have to start feeding them the same shit they are trying to dish out to me.

    1. Dont care what they say, let that fuel you to push harder or join a different/more hardocre gym!

  20. Thank you for the article Troy, very inspiring. You’re certainly a gem in ROK as your writing is spot on with practical advice.
    If i may humble suggest the formula be so:
    (consistency + effort) x time ÷ analysis = success
    the only reason i surmise this is because at a certain point, analysis will be needed to see if the desired destination (success) is on target or a course correction is needed. corollarly, time is needed before analysis so as to not 2nd guess decisions on the on-set.
    i shall be applying this to my approaches. thank you.

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