Forget the movies that set aloof men against love-seeking women. It is men who are the hopeless romantics much, if not most of the time. And they express this extraordinary naivety by engaging in stupid behaviors that their fathers and other male role models should have beaten out of them. Though feminism, demographic trends, and socioeconomic realities encourage women to be entitled prima donnas, men add to the feedback loop by rewarding modern-day princesses.
Of course, there are sensible exceptions to avoiding the following behaviors. A time and a place, for example, can be found for defending a woman, most notably your mother or wife, from someone else’s verbal or physical attack. Likewise, sometimes emergencies or certain serious events mean you should put your priorities aside to help a high-quality woman who gives long-term value to your life. That said, in the vast majority of cases acting in this way is unnecessary, time-consuming, resource-draining, and plain self-destructive for a man.
So, here are the five things many men perversely and uselessly keep doing for women:
1. Fighting for them
I lost count long ago of the number of times I have seen a man step in to save a woman from either herself or a slight (usually deserved) against her. A girl will behave like a pork chop at a restaurant, club or elsewhere, picking a verbal or even physical argument with an employee or fellow patron. Along comes Captain-Save-a-Ho, who might not even know the girl, to protect her honor. The expectation of many women that men will do this for them is bad enough, let alone when a man does it of his own volition, without being requested.
In return for risking a physical or similar altercation with other people, the white knight invariably gets a smile, a few words, and perhaps a phone number. From this point onwards, though, the interaction between Mr. White Knight and the Entitled Damsel Who Causes Her Own Distress invariably fizzles out. And it is not just members of your typical white knight crowd who act this way. Men who are nominally good with women fall into this trap, too, confusing it with the opportunity to be “alpha” and dominate over another male. The most common outcome, sadly, is that a woman’s very poor behavior is condoned by a man falling over himself to be her medieval champion.
2. Fighting over them
This stupid behavior is only marginally better than fighting for women and the two activities consistently overlap. Whilst competition in life, including between men over women, should be largely encouraged, swathes of men are effectively scrapping over last Sunday’s leftovers on a Saturday, three days after the refrigerator stopped working.
Remember: a woman can be attractive but, because of her attitude and behavior, have very little long-term value for you. Countless men live with the illusion that if they toil hard enough to get the good-looking girl, it must be worth it. That’s simply not the case in modern times. To boot, a lot of sexually thirsty men nowadays are chasing physically low-yield women that their fathers and grandfathers would never have noticed.
At best, the majority of men who fight over women are dueling over the prospect of snaring a girl who one of them will probably fuck a few times, if at all. And if they do manage to secure the girl for a long-term relationship, the pairing usually implodes down the track. The man either realizes he wasted his time or suffers greatly in material terms, such as by being draped (divorce raped).
In the meantime, the girls being fought over have their egos stroked time and time again. Unattractive girls see themselves as attractive and attractive girls with foul, entitled princess personalities find themselves validated once more. Everything in these situations is predicated on the men fighting and proving themselves, rather than the women reaching an appropriate standard of physical and emotional femininity.
3. Paying for them
Unless you are completely sure you have claimed the world’s best girl for yourself (and even that belief is probably based on very false or temporary appearances), you should ideally be investing less financially in the relationship than she is. This may seem counterintuitive, especially when a man is sexually valued by women for his status, achievements, and resources. But we are not living in a time when almost every woman is marriageable. A man providing for a woman can only justify it if she is of high-quality and gives him something substantial back in return. On both these counts, most men are paying for dud deals.
In every long-term relationship I have had, I have put less into the relationship financially, proportionally-speaking. Almost always, even the girl’s gross investment has either approximated mine or surpassed it. For dates and during casual relationships, too, I pay for a woman’s time about as much as she pays for mine, if not less.
When relationships end, girls can and do play petty games over money or property you may be owed. What matters, however, is how you conduct yourself overall. Only when a woman has materially invested in you or invests in you should you invest in her. When patriarchy returns, the male-female dynamic will alter. Before that time, be sure she does her fair share financially.
4. Shifting or sacrificing their priorities for them
Unlike many other self-destructive behaviors concerning women, this one can be very incremental and hard to spot. It is very easy to procrastinate on your work, final exams, self-development goals, and the rest of your social life when what you feel is a high-quality woman comes along. In fact, nature has basically designed you to do that by throwing your biochemistry into a drug-like dependency at the beginning of a courtship. In addition to these problems early on, men are apt to continue the shelving of their other, more personal demands after the relationship is well established.
On a topic I will explore in more detail in another article, there should be certain hours in many days (or simply days in general) in which women do not even enter your mind. Contrast this with your average man, who will throw away opportunities to further himself to please his girl. And often she’s not his girl for much longer, as his neglect of himself becomes apparent in her less attracted mind. By devoting yourself to a ho, you become dispensable to a ho, not just psychologically, but physically, financially, and socially as well. Don’t let yourself rot.
Your body, finances, education, and other forms of self-improvement need to be your number one focus. After all, they are the only things you have (or don’t have) 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. Individual girls may come and go, but your obligations to yourself remain. Paradoxically, keeping these obligations to yourself is what attracts girls in the first place. A man who takes proper care of his money, career, body, and social life gets women.
5. Moving to them, for them
This is the one even my leftwing father warned me about. But it’s something a lot of guys are yet to learn. Like shifting or sacrificing one’s priorities, moving to a girl for a girl is conducive to throwing your own needs into utter disarray. Every time I moved to where a girl of mine lived, I did so mostly for myself. Whether to explore a new country for three months, or find a new, refreshing place to get my work done, the relocation benefited me. This is qualitatively far different from upending yourself to some new city for the mere chance to thrive and the overwhelming desire to please a girl.
Perhaps the saddest thing about the man who moves for his girl is that when he wants even a fraction of the favor he gave her, he’s often left in the lurch. Don’t make this mistake. Either she must move to you or you move to her for a lot of reasons that don’t revolve around her. If the relationship fails (and most of them do), you leave yourself in an equal or better position than the one you would otherwise have been in.
Don’t follow the crowd of thirsty males
Snap yourself out of these behaviors and help your friends shake them off, too. You may not indulge in them regularly, but the temptation to perform them at least sometimes is likely to be there. More broadly, we need to see a seismic shift in the way many men act. Become part of the solution.
So what’s just as bad as an entitled woman? A man who encourages her entitlement with obsequious validation.
Read More: 8 Things That Make A Girl Stupid And Useless