The 5 Most Decisive Moments In A Man’s Life

There are moments in a man’s life that fundamentally and forever change who he is.  Whether for the better or worse, that can be argued.  Of these, few are guaranteed to occur. Some of these opportunities you will seek out.  Some you will unquestionably avoid.  Others lay in the spectrum of in between.  They are primal experiences which touch upon the very basis of existence; firmly grounded in the bedrock of Maslow’s Hierarchy.  I cannot say these experiences make you a lesser or better man.  But you will never be the man you were before they happened.

1. Your first time


If you weren’t blindingly drunk, trust to the truth that you will not forget the first time a woman (or girl) agreed to have sex with you.  The fact that in only the past generation this act now lacks the likely chance of procreation is notwithstanding.  Instinctually you sense that sex leads to children and you have been proven worthy by the ultimate gatekeeper of fertility that your hereditary gifts are of value enough for her to invest the better part of 20 years.

Modern society and certainly birth control have cheapened the moment to a degree, but only in the intellectual sense.  The pleasurable aspect of what has been called a “sweet surrender” (long before Sarah MacLachlan used the phrase) is inexplicably tied to this ages old triumph of man.  Depending on circumstances, this act may have incurred not insignificant risk from a protective father or an inquisitive public entity. But you succeeded in your goal and forever will have the knowledge that you have the skillset required to meet the first and most important biological imperative—reproduction.

2. The birth of your first child


Traditionally, men were absent from this moment, and they were lesser men for it.  Perhaps it weakens the more aggressive spirit by tying you so closely to both your progeny and the woman who sacrificed (and will sacrifice much more in the future) to bring him into the world.  There are few more helpless moments for a man than to watch the woman he hopefully loves in pain and be powerless to ease her suffering.

There is a buildup of emotions as the pain increases the closer the birth comes.  And then there is the crescendo of emotions as the child is born, the woman largely released from her pain, and you gaze, for the first moment, upon your child.

A burden is placed immediately upon you (if you retain an ounce of honor) that will remain forever.  But with that burden (and what is a man’s life if completely devoid of duty?) comes the knowledge that a part of you will live on far past your own life.  Likewise, the woman whom you have supported has repaid you in full and in a way that remains uniquely the domain of the feminine.  And in that moment, as surely as the child has passed the birth canal, the man has changed permanently into a different version of himself.

3. Imprisonment


Captivity is, more so than death, arguably the greatest challenge for a man to face.  The knowledge that you are restricted in doing anything of value makes a man of intellect challenge his most basic assumptions and philosophies.  It is little surprise then that so many philosophers and writers have described imprisonment as the essential catalyst to their thought and writing. Nietzsche, Solzhenitsyn, Dostoyevsky, Stockdale and countless others have used prison to define who they are and what is truly important to them, their society and what it is to retain control of your spirit when all else is in the control of others.  Whether the imprisonment is deserved or not, the man who serves hard time is transformed.

As Nietzsche said upon his release from prison, “That which does not kill me makes me stronger.”  Some leave prison a broken shell, others leave determined to make up for the time lost forever and, like Nietzsche, stronger for it but, regardless the direction, a different man than before.

4. Close combat


Men are stronger than women.  We rejoice in sports, itself a surrogate for war, in a way the fairer sex does not.  We are naturally aggressive, competitive and challenging of others.  These traits exist because men, ultimately, exist to fight other men.  Either in an aggressive attempt to take that which belongs to others or to defend against the predation of other men.  As Hobbes correctly observed, primitive man lived a life nasty, brutish and short.  And if you wanted to live long enough to take part in some other, more pleasurable, activities a man had to not only be able to fight, but to win.

Today’s combat generally bears scant resemblance to the shoulder to shoulder slaughter that existed from pre-historic times to the end of the 19th century.  The history of combat until the advent of modern firearms ensured you saw your enemy.  Close enough to touch him in most instances.  Certainly within the distance to see “the whites of his eyes.”  Combat was a personal experience.  And the odds of victory were fairly even.  Your natural abilities, your training, your aggressive spirit and the men to your side were the difference between victory and death.

When you reach that moment and win, it is a primal moment.  It brings you instantly back to your vestigial cave man instincts.  The varnish of civilization is stripped away and the primordial man stands exposed to the elements.  It isn’t pretty.   But it is pure.   Yet again, a moment from which you emerge a different man.

5. Death


There can be no doubt that death changes a man.  And how a man faces the moment of his impending, unquestioned demise is the final, ultimate measurement of what kind of man he is.  He alone will stand judge at this moment.  For who else would matter?  Your reputation will live on.  Your children, your friends, your comrades will remember your triumph or failure at this ultimate moment but their opinion will remain withheld from you.

This is not meant, of course, to advocate the embrace of death.  Indeed, those who fight against their own death are honored.  But so too are those who accept it with dignity and, perhaps, a touch of humor.  Obviously a sudden death provides little opportunity for introspection.  But hand maiden to the aforementioned combat is the requirement to come to grips with, and accept, the possibility of your own demise.  You must know the possibility exists that your life will be forfeited to the requirements of the mission and to the lives of your comrades in arms and we, as a nation, rightfully laud those who do so.  It is, after all, this ultimate willingness to sacrifice yourself for the collective defense of your family, your community and your country that makes civilization possible.

There may be other moments in a man’s life that some feel transform him.  But I can think of no others that do so on such an elemental basis touching upon the very essence of our being.  There may be moments unique to each man that transform him.  Challenges perhaps unknown to others.  Recognize these moments.  Embrace them.  Reflect upon them.

And see every setback, no matter how onerous or painful, as an opportunity to become the better man we must desire to be.

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138 thoughts on “The 5 Most Decisive Moments In A Man’s Life”

  1. 1. Your first time
    Your first year together when you just “know” that the red pill is bullshit and that NAWALT.
    2. The birth of your first child
    The greatest biological trap God created.
    3. Imprisonment
    If you can’t enter private proprieties without other’s consent, does that make u imprisoned? Wait, whut?
    4. Close combat
    When u realise you’re just an animal
    5. Your Death
    That moment your family has been long expecting for, tired of seeing your old and decreped ass.

    1. Your father fell into a that ‘trap’ as did every other person in your lineage since, well, life sprang up on the planet. I’m not certain it’s a trap so much as “what life is supposed to do”.
      I my 20’s I used to shun the idea of children. That changes for the vast majority of men in time, some exceptions to the contrary notwithstanding.

        1. Your entire post was angst-y, there’s no way to read sarcasm on the interwebs short of a [/sarc] tag I’m afraid.

        2. Can’t blame you. I do operate on 2 systems. One that is more traditional, the other one is screw everything.

  2. 1. First time – Remember it like it was yesterday. Girl was blonde and totally smitten with me for whatever reason. I don’t know why honestly, I was another dorky teenaged boy, but apparently I rung her bells so, she rung mine. In the band practice back room where all of the school instruments and choir uniforms were stored, while everybody else was out on the field near the football playing area watching events (band contest I believe).
    2. Birth of first child – I’ll just add “Birth of all of your children”. Unless you’ve like 70 kids and cannot buy a condom for your tallywacker like a good Protestant can and are forced, unfortunately, to sell the lot of your children for scientific experiments.
    3. Imprisonment – No real experience, I’ve always been good at evasion (except on foot, where, due to lack of running abilities, I’d be fucked twice over if I had to escape a cop on the street).
    4. Close combat – sucks, but true.
    5. Death. No experience, but so much has been written about it that I suspect that it probably has some impact on a life, wot? Heh.

  3. What about ruin? I would assume it is on the same level as imprisonment, but men out there who lose everything, their marriage their job their money and are left with nothing, some never recover, but some emerge a stronger animal, a merciless beast who stops at nothing to ascend the food chain once more and to do so with incredible desire.

    1. My father fell into the later category. My mother raked him over the coals in their divorce. The first Christmas after he was booted out of the house (because God forbid the woman have to leave) I bought him his only present for Christmas from anybody. My mother did a bang up job of alienating a lot of his and her family from him, so it was just me. A cast iron skillet, that’s what I bought him, with my allowance money.
      He still has it, today, 37 years later, coated with a thin layer of oil and hanging from his pan rack in the first spot. We haven’t spoken about that year at all since then, but I learned a huge lesson seeing how he recovered to not only get his family back, but also build a new life with a wonderful new wife and become far more successful than anybody could have guessed.
      Saw some other men go down in flames too. It’s exactly as you describe.
      EDIT: It’s kind of funny, they should have known never to get married in the first place, ol’ mum and da. Their families fought each other directly a couple of times in history, you’d think that they’d have taken the hint, heh.

        1. It was something I actually put thought into, although I didn’t know until later that nobody else got him a gift. He was always an excellent chef and can (and could) fry up some righteous grub. By late 1970’s measures, I spent a wad of money on it.

        2. Indeed, he still fries up breakfast in it when we visit.

        3. At the time I really didn’t think about any real messages, except “Hey, you cook really good, hows about I give you something to fry me some bacon in!” Heh.
          What he took from it was most likely entirely different.

        4. Hey it was a significant gesture from a son to a father. That was a gift born of feeling and caring, and no doubt your father saw it that way. Makes me happy just thinkin’ about it.

        5. That cast iron skillet! My father was a chef, and before he passed away in 2009, he handed down to me several of his “tools of the trade” – knives, pans, pasta rollers, etc. – Every Holiday, we clamp those rollers to the counters and crank out fresh pasta – these things really do have special meaning!

      1. GOJ I have a question for you.
        As I skim through Facebook and other MSM feeds, a claim I keep seeing is that Trump’s temporary ban of immigration from the five war-torn middle-Eastern countries is unconstitutional.
        Is this executive order actually unconstitutional, or is this just liberals being liberals?

        1. I guess it depends on how they’re worded. If they are instructions to federal agencies on regulatory enforcement, then they’re likely fully constitutional. If they’re writing new law, then they are not. I suspect that they’re the former, however, the Left is insistent that we forget our history where we banned almost all immigration from the 1920’s through the mid 1960’s, and pretend that we’ve always been full open borders and to say otherwise is “unconstitutional”.
          But I’d really have to see the wording of the EO’s he’s signed, which I’ll admit right up front, I have not.

        2. Thanks.
          I don’t see any nations specified (well, not by name, not Syria or anything), nor do I see Islam/Muslim mentioned. While I’m not qualified as a legal expert in these matters, I have to wonder what all the hubabaloo is about. That we put a 90 and 120 stop on a few known terrorist originating areas to get a handle on things? That we dare to prohibit people who served with terrorist organization? Oh, how terrible.

      2. Cast iron skillet. Those things can last more than a few lifetimes if well maintained. The culinary version of giving Excalibur to a chef. Maybe i’m just reading some powerful imagery from that but I like what you did.

    2. I don’t believe there is a greater positive catalyst for a man, than having his back against the wall. Only then will he find out what he’s truly made of…once a man escapes a life-or-death situation and rises from the ashes, he has the chance to become an unstoppable force and achieve everything to which he sets his mind. Ironic but true.

      1. Let’s not exagerate. Some do well, most end up on the streets asking you whether u want to hear his tragic life story in exchange for a couple of bucks.

        1. Everybody’s field of vision is different. And every man takes the limits of his own field of vision for the limits of the world.

      2. “Once a man escapes a life-or-death situation and rises from the ashes, he has the chance to become an unstoppable force and achieve everything to which he sets his mind.” – So True! Beautifully Stated Bob!

        1. Grazie, my friend. I guess the only way a guy would know this, is if he’s had his back against the wall and came away better for it. Otherwise, it sounds like Zen B.S. (heh)…

      3. ‘become an unstoppable force… achieve everything to which he sets his mind’. Sorry but this is totally blue pill thinking. If a man with very little mathematical ability decides to take up a math degree he is not going to get very far. It’s actually a major blue pill bugbear -you can do everything you want to do! No, you can achieve it IF you have the aptitude for it to begin with. Ambition without reality is useless.

    3. I thought I knew what being down was, like everyone thinks hard times are. But it wasn’t until I had lost nearly everything that I found the bottom. Ruin doesn’t happen overnight or have a sign when you arrive. It’s where you see clearly how the universe is built on cause and effect, and how there are absolutes. In successful times, it’s a luxury to not experience true need. Anyway I built myself back, from the ground up and I let both the down and the comeback change me for the better. I’m grateful now because I wouldn’t be who I am today without it and it will translate to even better accomplishments in the future than what I’ve already achieved. A lot of red pill men have similar stories and reactions I’m sure.

  4. The Five Most Pivotal Moments of My Life
    1) Realizing that women are the exact opposite of how they are portrayed in books, on TV and in movies (i.e., they have no self-control and they are totally at the mercy of whatever is in front of their faces at any given moment).
    2) Realizing that our friends and family members are behind us – but only to a point. So long as we don’t get too far ahead of them, they will root for us. Otherwise, they will actively work against us.
    3) Realizing the true meaning of the Golden Rule: “He who has the gold makes the rules.”
    4) Realizing that basically everything we have been taught since birth is a lie.
    5) Realizing that certain women exist, who can give blowjobs so expertly, they can make a man cum twice within a span of about three minutes.

      1. They are out there. I have had five of them. I don’t know if they have access to some secret blowjob manual, or what, but they exist. Once you get a BJ like that, all others seem tame. I moved in with the first one who did that to me. And I lived with two others who could do it, and had a serious thing with the final two. I’m always looking out for No. 6 – no luck so far, but I’ll find her. Oh yes. BwahahaHAHAHAHAHA (insane laughter).

        1. You can train them yourself.
          Something similar to projection or developing an association that your pleasure = her pleasure in her mind. There are even those who get off on the temporary “in-charge” facade during the act, you can play that up to get them even more into it.

        2. That’s a great idea. I tried to explain the process to a couple of girls, but they couldn’t get the job done. So I figure if I let enough women blow me, I’ll eventually find another one – probably the long way around the barn, agreed.

        3. Yeah, I’ve found it’s most successful with true subs (and most of the more high-power position ladies who are closet subs) but next time get a riding crop from that barn and take it along, works wonders.

        4. Wow. I’ve never gotten into the extreme side of this thing – but I think it’s really, really interesting (riding crop, etc.). To my way of thinking (and I could be totally wrong or only seeing part of the field of view, which is more likely), certain women have the proclivity and the talent to give this type of blowjob. And also, they really crave it and they really love it. I’ve tried to instruct/train a couple, and they just didn’t seem to have the ability. But with a riding crop as extra incentive…I might have to try that one out. Thanks for the tip.

        5. Totally true. When my exGF gave her first BJ to me it was her first BJ in general and she literally sucked at it.
          She was rubbing her teeth on my cock and when she was finished my dick was bleeding.
          But after about six month I trained that submissive cunt how to give the perfect BJ and she loved it when my cock was pulsating in her mouth while she got a rush from the fact that she ‘owned’ me during those BJ minutes.
          She then gave me hundreds of BJs over a two year period.
          Then she dumped me and took her blowjob abilities with her. *sniff*

      2. My kurdish exGF was such a beast. Damn, I hate that fucking SJW cunt raised by a single mother but my cock and I miss her mouth so much.
        *Oneitis reestablished*

  5. I would replace 4 with “military service” as opposed to “Close combat”. Serving in the military used to be a rite of passage for men in the United States and Great Britain.
    Even if one does not deploy to a combat zone, the lessons of discipline, brotherhood and military education are valuable lessons for men, especially today.
    While I would have more respect for men who deployed during their service, I wouldn’t begrudge a man who didn’t deploy simply because the President or Prime Minister was too cowardly to destroy the enemies of the U.S. or Great Britain. The exception to this would be the cliched E-7 who was in from 2001-2011 and somehow never deployed (generally, because they were using rank to dodge deployments).

    1. Agreed.
      I learned more about the world seeing it firsthand bouncing between Asia, Europe and North America over the years than any book could teach.
      The fun part is when you have an E-8 who somehow dodged every deployment over a 20+ year career.

      1. A Top without combat was nothing more than a REMF NCO (No Chance Outside) who likely wouldn’t have ever made the rank of Janitor in real life.

        1. It showed during the deployment. He was such a walking cluster fuck the division CSM got involved and demanded his retirement paperwork.

        2. I had an E6 drill sergeant in basic training back in 2005 who actually bragged that he had never deployed, and became a drill sergeant specifically to avoid deploying.
          Thankfully, he wasn’t the drill sergeant for my platoon. Unfortunately, one of the drill sergeants for my platoon was killed in 2011.

        3. You can sniff those guys from a mile away. During field deployment (non hostile), they liked to clip shit on their web gear and pack that you know is wrong and would get tangled in the brush or combat, or make noise if you were trying for stealth. Fucking idiots with stripes.

        4. They are also the first guys to justify getting a CIB/CAB for being 1km away from where a mortar round hit on the FOB. They are known to inhabit battalion TOCs, Company CPs and Brigade or higher headquarters.

        5. “What did you do during Desert Storm?”

        6. You realize that Desert Storm was almost 30 years ago. Ask most of these guys and they would say, “I sucked on my mom’s titty”

        7. What sucks about the modern world is that my cultural references are gone at a much earlier stage in life than my parents and grandparents had to contend with. For example, Clark Gable, who was dead before I was born and whose movies showed in 0.0% of theaters when I was growing up, was still easily recognized by kids my age. Today I’d be lucky to find a kid who knows who Emminem or Kurt Cobain is any longer, let alone some crusty old jokes from even fifteen years ago.

        8. I hear of Emminem or Nirvana, and I think “modern” still. 500 years from now, I doubt anyone other than maybe Elvis and Mozart would be known.

        9. Heh, yeah, when somebody says “around 10 years ago” in a conversation, I still think “Oh, the 1990’s”.

        10. I knew a janitor at a university who was a retired CSM. I worked in the mailroom and found that rest of staff hated him.

        11. #6: That moment when it hits you that, by the end of this year, EVERY girl born in the 90’s is at LEAST 18….

        12. You could be right there. No idea who either of those guys are! 😀
          Know Clark Gable though… 😀

      1. Don’t have ’em all in one location yet. But when I get around to it, I will be sure to let people here know…

    1. I really don’t know if that is any worse than your typical NSA sex. So, you just gave her the money instead of buying dinner. A prostitute is more honest about her intentions and saves the hassle.

    2. Same here and very glad it was. I told her I was inexperienced and she didn’t believe me at first. My ignorance and nervousness convinced her it was true.
      She was kind to me and taught me a lot in that short meeting.
      It could have easily gone the other way and been a nightmare but I was fortunate.

    1. I was fulled with joy when my father died, he was a total a$$hole…but I loved him none the less…

      1. Worse still is a salesman. It’s so bad that there have been actual plays and musicals written about it. I shit you not.

  6. 7.) The joys of In-N-Out Burger…I am crushing two double-doubles and a side of fries as we speak. It’s my one semi-frequent culinary vice. (With a chocolate shake, of course.)

    1. Still family owned, yes? I gotta respect the fact they never sold out and are still a regional business

      1. Hey, keep your chin up and your taste buds ready…there will probably be one there someday.

    2. Yes, a thousand times yes. I try really hard not to go more than once every two weeks. Back in college when my metabolism didn’t give a shit, I would hit that place up once or twice a week. Best bang for your buck and healthiest compared to the rest. Oh… and it always tastes amazing.

  7. ” But so too are those who accept it with dignity ”
    What about a rationale suicide? Would that count?

  8. As a man in his 40’s, it hit me lately that I am probably closer to the end of my life than the beginning. Of course you can always get hit by a bus, but there is something about the inevitability to it. My days of doing this or that adventure are limited. Probably by summer, my son (12) will be able to outpace me in a foot race.
    I’m not ready to take up the rocking chair yet, but sometime between 30 and 40, you realize how short life is.

    1. Man ain’t that the truth. I can think back 15 years in the past when I was relatively “young” and it was like just yesterday, then I think that in 15 years I’ll be what everybody calls “old” and it really bothers me how much I haven’t done and how much I wanted to do and how little time I have left to do it in. I intend to stay very healthy until the end, but that doesn’t mean that I stop aging. It’s rather sobering.

      1. It really pays to do what you can when you can. I talk to many betas at church who really haven’t done much other than get out of high school, serve a mission, co to college, marry and have kids. They spend their days at work and eventually get old. One more reason to throw away the TV.

        1. Absolutely. I’m only 25 and I realize how fleeting it all is. If I’m not out in the Rockies enjoying the mountains I love and my youth, I’m not having a good day and feel like I’m missing out. My dad is 55. Still climbing mountains, still rafting class five rivers. I hope I can keep it up as long as he has.

        2. With that profile, 99% chance you will be keeping it going. There’s this old Russian guy in my neighborhood, he kicks everyone’s ass at tennis, it’s insane how difficult he is to beat and I’m pretty good. I already told him that’s how I want to be when I get into my 60s (20 years from now).
          No oversleeping throughout your 20s is a good thing. Carpe diem, carpe noctem at that age man…

        3. I got in the habit of getting up early to go snowboarding, so if I sleep past 7 am I feel like I’m missing out!!! It’s so beautiful here in Denver 99% of the time if i’m not outside I’m having a bad day. It’s a mind boggler to be in waist deep snow and freezing your ass off and then drive back down to the city and go ride your bike in 70 degree sunshine. Like that Russian guy, there are old dudes on the mountain that are 80+ and still SMOKING it on a pair of skis. Gotta stay at it.

    2. The tragedy of being in your 40s is having the wisdom in life you wish you had in your 20s.
      If I could go back in time and visit with my younger self I would slap some sense into me.

      1. With that wisdom you can make sure your future 60-year-old self won’t feel the same way about your 40s…
        “No ra-grets”

      2. I couldn’t agree more…I’m in my ̶e̶a̶r̶l̶y̶ ̶5̶0̶’̶s̶ mid 50’s. If I could go back I’d beat the shit out of myself for being such a dumbass.

    3. My first child was born at the end of last year and I’m already entering my late 30’s. When I heard his first cry as he entered the world I swore to myself that I would live until he enters manhood.

      1. I had my first in my late 20’s, #6 came 5 months ago. Not sure if we will have any more. Progeny is a double sided coin, it ties you down, but it gives you a reals sense of purpose and accomplishment. Not one in a thousand people have any lasting impact outside their family.

      2. I’m in the same boat, a few years from 40, and my firstborn son was born in November. It does indeed change ones perspective quite a lot.
        I notice that I am a lot more careful than before, I feel obliged to do what I can to ensure I will be around to teach, support and guide him for as long as possible.

    4. hahaha – I divorced my bitch wife in 2000, when I was 45. My daughter was 10 and I thought we had a great relationship. I took her whitewater rafting in the Grand Canyon, visited Las Vegas, Boston, Chicago, Supercamp in NC, France, Spain, etc. Even supported her financially from 18-21 after the child support expired. But once I stopped paying her, she immediately stopped visiting and speaking to me. It’s been 6 years now. She is 27 now. 2 years ago she broke her silence to falsely accuse me of sexually molesting her at 14.
      I am 61 now. Have lived alone ever since the divorce. I don’t trust women and know the laws are stacked against men. I tried making new friends and foolishly invested my money in a variety of start up business and Ponzi schemes. So now I am poor. It’s tough. Every risk you take can (and usually does) go bad. My advice – for what it’s worth – is be careful and prudent. Don’t trust anybody.

  9. Nietzsche “upon his release from prison”?? Read a lot of and about Nietzsche. Never heard of him going to prison. Link?

    1. The prison…….of the mind, maaaaaan.
      Dude, get your hippy on, yo!

      1. He’s probably thinking Doestoevsky. He was imprisoned, and while there, the Tsar played a prank on him with a mock execution. Talk about a decisive moment!

    2. You are absolutely correct. I had in mind G. Gordon Liddy’s quoting Nietzsche when he was released from Prison (which he quoted in the original German) and meant to say Liddy quoting Nietzsche and I just forgot. A total screw up on my part. Thank you for the editorial work, I hope it didn’t detract too much from the piece.

  10. Ambrose in De Iacob et vita beata II, 12:
    The words of the holy woman return to our minds, who said to her sons: “I gave birth to you, and poured out my milk for you: do not lose your nobility.” Other mothers are accustomed to pull their children away from martyrdom, not to exhort them to martyrdom. But she thought that maternal love consisted in this, in persuading her sons to gain for themselves an eternal life rather than an earthly life.
    And thus the pius mother watched the torment of her sons … But her sons were
    not inferior to such a mother: they urged each other on, speaking with one
    single desire and, I would say, like an unfurling of their souls in a battle line.

  11. I would add to this list, “Getting fired/laid-off and watching your job go to India.”

    1. I actually thought of giving a perfect reply, but then realized that there is no point in consoling losers & whiners.

      1. Knowledge and skill in the use of toilet paper is required for clever retorts. Perhaps, your next incarnation will correct that deficiency.

  12. I disagree with #1. Although it might be because I didn’t fuck the first girl I knew I could’ve slept with, and neither did I fuck the first girl who touched my dick or wrapped her lips around it.
    So when I did have sex for the first time, it didn’t feel like some life changing experience so much as taking one step deeper into the water because I’d already experienced most everything else up to that point.
    The idea that your first time is “when you become a man” is a load of bullshit as well. There are plenty of non-virgins who are complete beta’s.
    I’d argue that a bigger turning point isn’t the first time you have sex, but the first time you realise you WANT sex. I still remember, being no more than 4 years old, seeing certain women with their pretty faces and long hair and knowing I wanted something from them….but of course I didn’t have a clue what that was!
    And as Bob Smith mentioned, waking up to the true nature of women and how much it differs from what we’re told in mainstream TV and movies, is a far more life- changing moment.

    1. I would agree. First sex was just one more step. I would say more importantly is realizing that women are not the pinnacle of creation. Crazy thing is, once you figure that out, your success with women goes up 10 fold.

      1. “More importantly is realising that women are not the pinnacle of creation”.
        Bang on. And the rest of your comment is why I have a BIG problem with large sections of the modern-day church, telling the young men in their congregations and youth groups that “woman are the pinnacle of God’s creation”.
        Is it any wonder so many of these “men of God”- the ones who stick around- turn into such emasculated pussy worshippers? And everybody loses. The men lose. The women lose. The Kingdom of God loses.
        Fucks’ sake, Christian men SHOULD be amongst the most “red pill” out there but instead there’s virtually nothing about them that would make an impressionable, adolescent male think “I want to be like that guy”.
        So instead they idolise rock stars, sports stars and various other celebs, and the church loses them in the process. I kid you not, if we got the men right in church, people would flock to be involved- even the non-believers…

        1. I see it in my church as well from time to time. Woman was made out of man as a help-meet, not man being created for the woman. Decades of cuckoldry taught to the masses is a difficult ship to turn around, even in the churches.
          Yes, we should be taught to treat our wives with dignity, but little is taught about how we are to lead the family. (Gives me an idea for what to teach Sunday school this coming week, thanks)

    2. Spot on, I had similar experiences and to me my first time didn’t matter nor was it memorable, and no I wasn’t drunk. I think perhaps the first time with my wife was a bigger deal, since it was the first time with someone I didn’t have a bunch of reservations about and trusted.
      I could never get my grove on with prior girls because I didn’t trust them, would not have wanted children with them, and I knew they were temporary.
      The others I’d agree on.

  13. Back in the 1980’s —Getting fired or lay’d off 7 jobs in a row. Remembered that last one. You learn;
    -people can be asssholes; the nicer they come across the worse they usually are. Not everyone comes to work to make the company better etc. Some of these folks only goal is to find a dim bulb in a 1000 points of light and baiting you with a dimmer switch. Whether the place burns down or not is irrelevant. Its about them and taking you down and making themselves have power over you. If you get a good boss; 1 out of 10…consider yourself lucky.
    … and no matter how long or how hard you work for a company- the day you leave is the day your forgot. I don’t care if they make a monument to you; the next day some guy will come along with a bulldozer and a lot of nasty sarcasm on how bad you did your work. Id like to say that is sarcasm but I actually seen the bulldozer do the work.

  14. “…you have been proven worthy by the ultimate gatekeeper of fertility that your hereditary gifts are of value enough for her to invest the better part of 20 years”
    I hear what you’re sayin’ man – but I think those days are no longer. Many men would really enjoy having a family but have opted out full well knowing that today’s females are shit, and the system is shit.

    1. The system has always been shit, and females have always been the same.
      People have procreated through wars, through slavery (as slaves), through famine, pestilence and plague. Now we’re supposed to give it all up because a few feminists sneer at us and have a few legal advantages in court?

      1. Agreed, however you have to do it intelligently. Falling in love with a typical aging bar hag or knocking her up and hoping she won’t come after you isn’t the brightest idea. A 55% success rate of marriage, with 70% of divorces initiated by women is not anything to brag about.

      2. “Now we’re supposed to give it all up because a few feminists sneer at us and have a few legal advantages in court?”
        Valid point.

  15. Hate to be pedantic, especially since I enjoyed the article, but *was* Nietzsche ever in Jail?
    He was certainly a professor of classical philology at the University of Basel in Switzerland, which I imagine would be similar…. and he was certainly institutionalised in his final years after he want mad… but prison?
    Someone with deeper Nietzsche knowledge (Lolknee?) might be able to answer definitely, but I don’t recall ever reading that he was ever a prisoner…

    1. You are not the first to catch that. I was thinking of G Gordon Liddy quoting Nietzsche and screwed up on writing it. Completely a mistake on my part and poor editing by myself.

      1. It’s really no big deal and doesn’t detract from the fact that this was a really great article, and I enjoyed it. Thank you, Sylvan, for writing it.

  16. Overcoming your addiction would be another moment. A moment I still might need to reach but have felt certain parts of before. A little taste. The feeling that you no longer need this thing which has prevented you from reaching your fullest.

  17. Done them all but death obviously, and I would add salvation to that list. It provides perspective on the rest.

  18. I don’t give a shit about your stupid family, your work, your daddy, your brothers, your sisters or your mommy.
    Only a sucker will sacrifice himself for a bitch.

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