How To Meet Girls If You Don’t Have Any Friends

As a man grows older, he will likely lose a significant number of friends and valuable acquaintances, naturally leading to smaller social circles.

While that is not entirely negative, since you won’t have that much in common with blue pill men and annoying females, and perhaps want to focus more on a few important people rather than sheer quantity, it is nevertheless the case that social circles may matter quite significantly for fun, business contacts, and dating opportunities.

A man who is 25 or more can counter eventual shortages with the help from what I regard as fleeting social circles. While such transient groups will likely evaporate as soon as they are dissolved by the surrounding circumstances that enabled them to come into existence in the first place, they are still appropriate for a variety of joyful ends and pastimes. In fact, some of them can create pretty long-lasting memories that transcend any time spent with boring betas or PC female friends.

Language groups

If we exclude online courses, official language studies are typically taught either at a university as a regular course or other educational institutes. I have realized that in at least certain parts of Europe, manifold universities or colleges offer free language courses, or rather “cafés” in the evening, which even make it possible to join if you’re a non-student.

Such language groups will likely include younger women and men that you can hang out with afterwards at bars, restaurants, or home parties. If you are only there for the women, you could at least show up once or twice and see what such groups offer in that regard.

For example, at a university in Europe where I was studying Korean, there were plenty of young Korean and Swedish women at such a language group that was organized once every week. When I, as a single guy, realized that most of them unfortunately were dull or ugly I stopped going there, but still I exchanged contact information with a few 5s and 6s that I didn’t sleep with but met again a couple of times in platonic and friendly contexts.

Evening courses

Another option is various kinds of courses that are taught in the evening, like cooking, dancing, or fighting.

Typically, cooking classes include more older people, dancing younger (if it’s street or hip hop rather than salsa), and fighting more men, but each to his own goal and purpose. Meeting women could for some be considered a mere side effect, rather than the primary reason for going there.

University groups

If you have some form of link to a university or college, you could take advantage of fraternities, mini organizations, and work opportunities that are connected to student environments. It might seem a bit silly to be part of a literary group or work at a campus club or bar when you have passed 25, but if it helps you meet young women then that may be a wise choice.

When I was attending a university in Scandinavia, I acted as a DJ a couple of times and got plenty of contact with the opposite sex just by playing music. I have also heard a close friend saying that to be at the top of a student organization that throws dinners and parties can give you plenty of easy lays.

If you are a bit younger I would advice to seek out such environments and be involved for a limited period of time, but in some contexts a somewhat older male could be included as well.


For the sole traveler it is of major importance to seek out hostels. Even if you are 30-40 and could pass as a younger type, you could occasionally do it without feeling more than slightly misplaced.

The benefits from hostels are that you could hit on girls who stay there, go out together in larger groups (which also enable you to cold approach girls outside the group), and meet male companions.

Such fleeting male groups will lead to a beneficial situation for everyone, since every guy gets social proof, which is often required when you go to bars and clubs. Girls will often think that you are a weirdo if you don’t have any friends nearby.

Further, it will likely be more fun to go out together. In 2016, four other guys and I threw a birthday party in my honor and served as wingmen to each other. I had met them only the day before.

Night clubs

For the more experienced and socially skilled guy, fleeting social circles could be formed inside clubs, which might be harder if you are completely alone but still very much possible. If you are part of a group you should try to stand out positively: act confident, look good, and make everyone around them have fun.

If you are alone you could try to cold approach a couple of girls until at least one is hooked, be vague when your main target asks you about where your friends are, and then join the new group for the rest of the evening. More people may be included as the evening proceeds.

One time I ended up being offered numerous drinks from guys who were after my target’s sister and their female friends.

Fleeting social groups may be an important tool that could be used for a variety of reasons, but often with the purpose of meeting females. Such could be formed at universities, evening courses, hostels, or night clubs, to name a few examples.

Read More: What No One Tells You About Approaching Girls Inside Your Social Circle

58 thoughts on “How To Meet Girls If You Don’t Have Any Friends”

  1. Being a Swedish guy in America is great. This is because American women are more into daygame than the cold Swedish women, and because American men are often fat and badly dressed (European men have better fashion than American).

      1. ” non-American scum” LOL So “non-American” equals “scum”. I bet you’re the kind who believed Iraq had “WMDs,” and that Iran “wants nuclear weapons”. Sounds like your level.
        You say this on a site that glorifies going to other countries to date women. A site owned by a guy who WRITES BOOKS on that subject. But if someone is dating women in YOUR country, then he is “scum”. What an idiot you are.
        And yes, it’s true that pretty much any Europeans will look better and dress better than Americans. Americans are obese or at least fat – this is the vast majority. And Americans dress like shit. What’s with the ugly cargo pants? At universities in Europe, the Americans are often easy to spot. Some will even go to the school cafeteria wearing flip-flops.
        Americans had one thing going for them in history: having an almost empty continent to take over. Lucky. But then they handed over their media and TV industry to (((the Tribe))) in the name of “Freedom!”, and we see the results. Unfortunately this affects the rest of the world too, since you need a large country to draw potential actors from in order to have a successful movie industry. But I digress. Body fat, meet cargo pants. Yeah, not a winning combo.

        1. and European men are easy to spot on American campuses: they’re usually walking hand in hand with another man

      1. “fag alert” for caring about one’s looks. Yep, sounds like an American all right. Now go back to eating your Doritos and drinking your diet coke. Oh, but with ice cubes in the glass, so it’s not all sugar!

        1. Why do European men have such skinny feet? I’ve seen European dress shoes and they look like they’re made for elves. They’re just missing the bells at the ends.
          You know what a REAL man’s foot looks like? EEEE. Extra Wide. Looks like someone poured Bisquick in a pan that just kinda spreads out. Moon boots.

        2. A fat Asian guy will pull better looking girls than you ever will no matter how tall or fit you are Whitey. White pig go home!!!

      2. “FAG ALERT!!!” LOL! Pretty much. Alpha males do not care about clothes, fashion, bling bling and other BS. I understand that most guys visiting this website are omegas trying to rise up the hierarcy to beta male status but Red pill means sticking to facts. Looking good depends on genes and taking care of your body, it has nothing to do with clothes, style, fashion, etc.
        If anyone wants to argue this, ask yourself, if Roseanne Barr had on the most elegant and beautiful party gown would you now think she is gorgeous?
        We all know the answer is a resounding – hell no!
        Back in the cave man days females didn’t sit around judging and selecting guys by what type of bear skin/ pelt jacket they were wearing.

        1. If Ugg the caveman is wearing the skin of the saber-toothed tiger that’s been stalking the tribe for years Uggina would pay attention.
          You gotta have the attitude to go with the look or you’re just half-assed.

        2. “Looking good depends on genes and taking care of your body”
          of course. But if you dress like shit (like wearing a t shirt with some superhero or cartoon character on it or a jean full dirt stains), it conveys the message you have shitty taste and/or no self-monitoring.
          Being styled and clean has nothing to do with peacocking or other pua’s bs.

        3. *Ethan Allan
          Actually no it wouldn’t matter what Ugg was wearing if he isn’t the Alpha male of the tribe. Even if Ugg was the best hunter in the tribe and had most of the ‘resources’ he might be able to barter with Uggina for some sex but in the end the true alpha of the tribe would just take anything he wanted from Ugg and all the females know this. Uggina would still want to be impregnated by the true alpha male of the tribe.
          Clothing was invented for protection from the elements not to be a status symbol or fashion statement. Only the social conditioning and engineering has made it important today through brainwashing. In any society were the majority rules, the majority are going to be the omegas and betas and naturally things will sway to what the majority wants. This is why abstract crap is what women are going for and why GAME works. Women have been socially conditioned and brainwashed to choose men based on Clothing, bling bling and other man made things and concepts like fashion, style, swagger and carisma. These are beta male strategies and things betas and omegas can provide or at least fake the funk. While good genetics are something they don’t have. Women today are not going for good genetics as they would in nature. Hence the dysgenic trend in western societies.

        4. Yeah, so I guess dressing to impress means showing up with jeans four sizes too big (only if you can’t find your idiotic “cargo shorts” first), idiot T shirt with sports logo and some other dude’s name on the back, flip flops, ball cap and of course, the goatee to cover up that double chin. Yep – those hotties will be throwing themselves after you, Mr. Alpha.

        5. “Dressing to impress” is beta male strategy.
          Of course today in most western nations you have to follow the rules of GAME to be successful because GAME works by exploiting what women have been socially engineered to go for. By wearing a watch and nice shoes you are not tapping into some evolutionary psychological faculty of women. (as some pick up artists would have you believe)

      3. A colleague from Europe once asked me,
        “Why do American men men smell?”
        “Because we bathe,” I answered.

    1. You sure are a feminized Swedish man. The manosphere is not a place to come on and boast about your success with women and also try to insult and rub it into the men of the country you are visiting. No wonder, the Muslims coming into your country have the same attitude and raping your women as you are getting you silly kicks over here, on this forum for manly brotherhood.

      1. You sure are a feminized Swedish man. The manosphere is not a place to come on and boast about your success with women and insult and try to rub it into the men of the country you are visiting. No wonder, (or is it because of?) the Muslims coming to your country have the same attitude and raping your women as you are getting you silly kicks over here, on this forum devoted to manly brotherhood.

      1. Hey JD, what’s the cheapest booze they sell at that 7-11? I can get Jinro Soju for 1500 won ($1.50) in Seoul.

    2. I was 30 when i started taking spanish classes at night at a community college. I quit my job and went with the class on a month long trip to guatemala. Ended up shacking up with a 20 year old girl from the class and exploring the country with her.
      Ive been on a rampage ever since. Anything is possible!

    3. Its funny how men of almost every country say the women at home suck. When I was in Britain, I found the women there lovely: well dressed, attractive, sweet, etc. British men hate them and prefer American women. I of course hate the latter. I guess the exotica even between two Anglo countries means so much.

  2. It’s just hard in general making or maintaining a lot of friends past age 28. Priorities kind of switch to family formation, stacking papers, or more introspective pursuits.

    1. Yeah. Solo trips and a few local things can counter limited social circles when you are single guy around 28-38 (exact age doesn’t matter). I like to travel with friends too but I would not allow myself to be limited by that.
      Ambiverts with decent confidence do perhaps benefit the most from this approach, since they can enjoy both company and solitude.

  3. the more i get old, the more i am misanthropic.
    the more i am red pilled, the more i loose friends.
    well, friends.. i meant blue pill and leftards.

  4. Great topic for an article. When you get redpilled relatively late and didn’t spend your younger years building up a circle of friends, you really do feel stuck on your own in your late 20s. Definitely something the average normie just doesn’t understand.
    I’ve usually been scoffed at when I mention going out to bars or clubs solo on the weekend, but I’ve had some great nights and met some great girls that way, even if they’re not long-lasting. Much better than sitting alone in your own thoughts at home.

    1. If you travel, you’ll find american expats were red pilled long before it was cool. If you’re local, pretty much any guy over 40 who drinks whisky is red pilled.
      Im 34 and live a secret red pill life in southern california. Beta friends privately admire that i prefer freedom to being some girls bitch. They see me occasionaly make some magic happen. Theyre jealous.
      We just have to remember that we’re pioneers. Most men we know will get married to an ugly, bossy, alpha female. She’ll make him buy a house he cant afford while she gains weight and gets bored with him. If Im alone 360 days out of the year, but I have five awesome stories with girls 14 years younger than me, and my freedom, thats a great life right there.

        1. Beards are OK until you start getting gray hair. I shaved mine off at 45. Then I shaved my head. I look at least 15 years younger.

  5. Another reason guys can’t find new friends is because of where they live. An apartment or house in a average U.S. neighborhood tends to attract folks that ignore each other. In a high-rise City apartment it’s almost impossible to friendless. You constantly run in to and socialize with neighbors at the elevators, the laundry room, even going outside for a smoke. I highly recommend High-rise living in a fun neighborhood. It’s not cheap, but it’s worth it.

    1. how are you going to recognize the thousands of people who live in a typical 10-20+ story high rise apartment building?

    2. Good point and a problem I’ve noticed myself. I live in a building with tons of young, hot 20-something girls but there is no way to ensure that after meeting them once, I will see them again in the next week.
      The next apartment I move to will have a billiards room or some other community feature where I can expect to see them again soon.

      1. The best time to meet women in my building is is around 7pm in the Lobby while they’re waiting for their Taxi/Uber rides. It’s better than a nightclub. No ones drunk and there’s the absence of loud music. It’s really easy.

  6. Oh Christ! It’s easy. It’s soooo very easy. It goes like this:
    Just say “Hi.” Just relax and be yourself, and smile. And if you get a “Go” signal, then pursue.
    That’s it.
    There’s always a book: How To Pick Up Girls! by Eric Weber. Must be over 40 years old by now, and worth the read if you’re wondering what to do.
    Thumbnail: Just be yourself and relax. Smile and say “Hi.” And if she gives you a “Go” signal, then pursue. And if not, then move on to the next one.
    (The perceptive reader will recognize the above paragraph is pretty much the same as the second. That’s how basic and sound the advice is.)
    So just go out there and do it.
    (And remember Boys, the hotter they are, usually the more insecure they are. And they’re usually wondering why guy don’t ask them out. So always head straight to the 9’s and 10’s.)
    Hope this helps.
    Just a thought.

    1. To say ‘hi’ is the necessary first step but the important thing is to be determined and confident enough to continue with the conversation. Plus day game doesn’t always lead to much IMO. Personally I see it more as a confidence booster. If a pretty girl looks at me and we may even exchange contact information then it is fine but I don’t expect much.
      The good thing with more serious social circles are that you could easily scan for potential partners, while fleeting social circles, Internet, and night game are good for faster sex and (brief) romances. But we should not let ourselves be specialists in this age, but generalists.

  7. I travel a lot for work, so I routinely will go to a bar or restaurant for dinner by myself and hang out for a few after dinner cocktails. I’ve slayed more girls rolling solo than I have going out with groups of friends, by quite a large margin.

        1. Don’t you have to deal with the girl’s friend? I know they’re not there alone.
          Do you just get her number and leave or are you trying to separate her from the friend?

        2. ROBO
          I find separating a girl can only work in large groups who are either;
          A. Been charmed by you or
          B. So drunk and high that they wouldn’t notice the girl’s absence.
          Try walking up to a mixed group giving only the girl attention and see how far you get- nowhere.
          However if you befriend the whole group and talk and joke with all of them, try to remember their names then they won’t mind if you want to borrow their friend for 5 minutes because you’re such a cool guy! “Hey, I’m totally ignoring your friend here, could I steal her for a few minutes and then bring her back? Come with me.”
          I’ve had groups of 4 guys downright offer their only girl to me, And gotten some free drinks, made some decent friends and temporary acquaintances while I’m at it.
          Smaller groups I prefer to just get the number as small groups can get bored and lonely without one of their members.
          Sounds like you have trouble with groups. Are you perhaps just focusing on gaming the target? You need to give the whole group attention.
          Thing about jazz is it kinda weeds out the vacant bitches. Bros don’t go to a jazz bar to neck pints of beer, and hen parties who just want to get fucked stay in clubs.
          So you’re left with girls who are (or want to think they’re) cultured.
          You have a common interest in the jazz, it’s relaxing, there to be listened to and enjoyed over conversation. I typically get her contact details and take her to an intimate coffee shop in 2 or 3 days. Kinda hard to stick your tongue down her throat in front of her friend.
          One last thing, I wouldn’t hop between tables like you’re at a club, get the number and stay with them for at least a while while you enjoy the music.

  8. If you can get in with a good social circle the lays come easy. I started hanging out with a group of slightly younger guys through a guy I worked with, they always had attractive girls around and I copped two sick bangs just by cooling it with them.

  9. Thanks for this article.
    In terms of night courses, while learning a new language is a good thing, the homework and practice and expressing yourself at the level of a native toddler gets annoying. A night course in cooking or drama has a more relaxed vibe to it – attendees just show up and “do” and there’s no tests. And usually more laughter.

  10. I began posting my account of successfully gaming an entire hostel of women, but it quickly became a 1200 word essay/ social commentary and erotic (non) fiction.
    I haven’t been impressed with foreign students at universities. Altogether very boring people.

  11. I know Roosh mentioned in a recent livestream that there was going to be more advice for women in 2018. I figure I might as well make good on the offer: do you have any tips for women who are in the same predicament who want to go out and have fun and meet people? Women actually use preselection really heavily on other women, so it’s even harder for girls on their own. The only think I can think of is moving to another city, honestly.

  12. Colleges are fucking great to find women. I started going to club meetings at a local uni and its almost like no one knows Im not a student. Hell, for a few years you can probably pose as a student until your mid 30s depending on looks. What was even funnier was when I went with some girls to a campus event with food and stuff paid for with student fees and I helped myself gratuitously.

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