Greetings, fellow dong-wielders of the Manosphere. As part of my efforts to be more involved in this space of ours, I thought I would first muse on a subject very close to my heart: music and the art of playing it.
Confucius said that “music produces a kind of pleasure which human nature cannot do without,” which I thought was a pretty non-gay way of summing up humanity’s relationship with the auditory arts. When it comes to playing, there are a lot of different types and styles of musical instruments. While some are less popular and mainstream than others, most folks know someone who plays guitar, piano, or sings.
I’ve been pondering on how studying the discipline of playing music is a worthwhile endeavor with several benefits. Most of my data comes from personal experience: I’ve been playing guitar for fifteen years and have been teaching myself how to play drums for about two. I’m no John Mayer, but I have developed enough competence through time and practice to play a few complex numbers and craft original songs of my own.
That said, science itself lends a lot of credence to the claim that learning how to play a musical instrument is a very healthy skill for the body and mind.
It Makes You Smarter
These days, the norm seems to be letting your brain atrophy via over-consumption of (anti)social media, television, and video games. Bucking the trends and engaging in a skill that actually makes use of your brain as well as your body can make you more intelligent.
Some of you reading probably understand that tickling the ivories or throwing down a polyrhythmic drum beat takes mental focus as well as careful coordination, but you probably didn’t realize that learning how to play music could boost one’s smarts.
The American Psychology Association acknowledged that in a study from 2006, an experimental group that was “given a year of voice or piano lessons saw a significantly larger increase in IQ than a control group that waited a year for musical instruction.” The study mentions that six years of lessons could be associated with an increase in IQ of 7.5 points!
In the highly competitive world that we live in, even a small increase like that could give someone more of an edge against the competition. But while correlation doesn’t imply causation, I guarantee that being able to bust out even a simple song will always get a girl more soaked than your sick baseball card collection.
Persistence In Learning A New Skill
“If I don’t learn this Mozart piece by dinner, my family will be greatly dishonored…”
I’d assume most men who have made it anywhere in life would probably tell you that they didn’t waltz down Easy Street to get there. They’d probably mention how their beginnings were rife with failure, or how badly they sucked when they first started their current gig. I think persistence is a key trait that is crucial in the game of life, and that it can be developed like a muscle.
Starting any new skill can be vexing as you struggle to learn the ropes and get through the learning curve. For most people just starting out on guitar, their fingers will act like a bunch of possessed worms all over the neck of the instrument, and to add insult to injury, your fingertips will be sore and throbbing from pushing down on the strings. With drums, it’s flailing limbs and blisters.
But if one can stick it out and Not Be a Fucking Pussy, then with time and diligent practice, the calluses and coordination will develop and the frustration will turn into fun. Enjoy the process and before you know it, you’ll dropping panties left and right with a simple strum (results may vary).
It’s A Healthy Use Of Time…And It’s Fun
Still easier to figure out than the female brain…
In our modern era, it’s unfortunately too easy to throw away precious time by scrolling through manufactured media and vapid TV shows. Let me be real for a second: a lot of hobbies are absolutely worthless, but I truly believe that learning how to play an instrument is as fulfilling as it is useful. Crafting sounds into a pattern that is pleasurable to the listener is almost a sacred act of creation.
Have you ever listened to a piece of music that made your hairs stand up and really moved you? Another human being manipulated vibrations in the air to stir that emotion. It’s almost legitimate magic.
As a hobby, playing music has serious longevity. Playing sports in high school might land you high on the social ladder, but once you graduate, the utility dries up if you’re not one of the small minority taking it to the next level. Many treat music as a life-long pursuit and it’s not uncommon to see a few old-timers absolutely slaying it on stage.
It’s also a lot of fun once you start to gain a little bit of competence. The more you play, the better you get, so it’s a guilt-free way to spend a few hours as opposed to the brainless timesinks of modern entertainment.
Chicks Dig It
“Hey fella, why dontcha show me what else you can do with those fingers…”
I probably didn’t have to include this one because everyone knows that musicians fuck. Perhaps being serenaded pushes some sort of emotional buttons in the feminine hindbrain, or maybe it’s the fact that women are attracted to high status males that are excellent at their chosen craft. Either way, it seems that bandbros and rockstars never want for pussy.
Not trying to brag, but I’ve experienced this firsthand, and I can’t stress how crucial my musical skills have been in getting me laid. One of the hottest girls I ever plugged told me that one of the main reasons she met up with me for a date was because she was impressed by a video she saw on my Instagram. I also once sealed the deal with what became a very solid plate by offering to give her a quick lesson. She brought her guitar over to my place, but the “lesson” didn’t actually happen.
It goes without saying that doing anything just to impress a woman is putting pussy on the pedestal, and if that’s your goal, then you’re probably better off buying a sweet sports car. However, if you want to potentially make yourself a little smarter, test your patience and persistence, and pick up a skill that could possibly help get your dick wet, I highly recommend finding an instrument that suits you and giving it a try. At the very least, you might gain a lot of personal enjoyment and creative fulfillment out of it.
Read More: 60 Myths On Memory, Learning, Sleep, And Creativity
Yeah, that is definitely great advice!
Can you speak a little to what instruments and musical genres are more difficult and which are less difficult to master? Just some examples would be great
The ukulele and bongos are probably the easiest for adults to learn, along with the harmonica. I play uke and harmonica and I like them both for their low entry cost and ease of portability. Lots of tutorials online can help you out.
As someone mentioned below, without investing a ton of time you could learn some easy four chord pop songs on the guitar or ukulele. It’s usually a hit, especially if you can sing. Harmonica, bongos, and cajons are pretty popular and don’t require as much of an investment in time and effort such as piano and advanced guitar. I think the learning curve for drums is way shorter than guitar and it’s probably the most fun instrument, although logistically inconvenient. Thanks for reading.
Nothing wrong with learning music. The title of the article is hyperbolic, sensationalist and incorrect though, possibly leading impressionable youths into self-doubt and futile pursuits sort of like the articles on why “you must do MMA”.
We all have distinct talents and interests and living according to our talents and interests tends to make us the happiest. In some cases our interests and talents do not match completely but having one or another factor going for you is necessary; if you don’t have interest nor talent, you’re frustrating yourself to fit someone else’s narrative. You need to have an underlying dream in the end of the tunnel; a vision of what you want to do with your realistically acquirable skill. If you cannot visualize that fantasy image, then perhaps it’s not your thing.
The comparison between music and high school sports is off too; you may not become a NFL player but it’s just as likely that you won’t become the next Elvis. If you start bodybuilding, judo, boxing, hip hop dancing etc. in high school and are still keeping at it at 30, you’ll have some serious skill in that sport and the chances are you have competed in local tournaments and are a qualified teacher in your club. That does not sound like a failure to me any more than playing in some neighbourhood pub is; both are respectable achievements open to the average guy who’s so inclined.
I once took a singing course in an evening college; it was not much but it was more music exposure than most adults get. I have no natural affinity for music and I could have spent that money and time on improving my core skills like languages. I think it’s good to figure out what your foundational core skills are and concentrate most of your effort there. You can also have small side interests that you devote a little bit of time and effort into but you should not sweat them. Every now and then when I have extra time, energy and money I’ll dabble in something I suck at or don’t care about that much (like cooking) just to challenge myself, be a better conversationalist and slightly more cultured but that’s that.
I agree 100%. It was not my choice for the title. Thanks for reading.
I totally agree. Even though all I play is a harmonica (not sexy) and ukulele (also not sexy) I think it is important.
Once at a climbing festival I was the only guy at the campfire with an instrument (uke) and it helped me land a cute 20-something for the night.
My daughter plays guitar and earns extra money playing at the public market.
If you got that surfer, ska, carefree kind-hearted chad vibe, you can score some tail with an uke.
The Sword Arm was the last word in authority for thousands of years. Playing an instrument is often a display in mental acuity, arm strength, and lower-arm/ hand dexterity. It’s absolute dread game, in the female human hindbrain, a full display of a man’s potential for power. A man will play an instrument, a woman will dance.
I took a guitar class in the fifth grade. I could learn the mechanics but never had the passion for it. My Dad could strum a guitar and play an accordion by hear pretty well and he did it for fun sometimes. But I did not get the music gene.
Dabbled in piano a bit. It does make your fingers more limber. I do respect people who have a natural aptitude for music. It takes time and much practice to do it better.
At Someone,
The passion thing is definitely important. You have to ask yourself if it’s your fantasy to see yourself playing for a big audience or not. Everyone would probably like to be able to do that among other skills if they could magically skip all the hard work but only a select few people will have the spark go off inside them and make them say “hell yeah! this is my thing!” and work hard on making that fantasy a reality. The rest of the people cannot see the attraction in that; it does not speak to them strongly enough and they could never be brought to envy the greatest musicians because of what they can do and what they receive praise for; they may appreciate the fame and girls that come with it but that applies to any craft on a very high level.
Mandolin is pretty easy, just four courses with symmetrical tuning all in 5ths (GDAE, just like a violin.) The reentrant tuning on a uke always gives me trouble for some reason. Mando is also easier than guitar for most people unless you have large hands. They can get expensive though, but you can get a cheapo for a few hundred that’ll probably do the trick.
“I probably would have had a bit more passion for the technicalities of music if there had been a piano in the house, because I don’t think music falls into place properly until you’ve conquered the keyboard… And so I didn’t start to actually understand the fundamentals of music until I started playing the piano and I didn’t start playing the piano until I was 22.” ~ Pete Townshend
“I’ve experienced this firsthand, and I can’t stress how crucial my musical skills have been in getting me laid.”
Yeah, but getting good enough to play well enough to get laid, that takes considerable time. You’ve played for 15 years. When did it get you laid? Year 2? 5? 10?
There are groupies for everything and everyone. Some girls love musicians, others love meatheads, pretentious intellectuals, poets, fine artists, martial arts guys, worldly guys, trashy guys and so forth.
The few music people I know have dated and married or are set to marry fellow musicians and music teachers probably because they run into their kind constantly or because they have a common interest. One of them is a young relative of mine (male) and as far as I know he’s been banging the same girl since 2011. He never looked like a girl like some of those rock guys and was a quiet, burly scandinavian man instead who does not scream rock and roll and he was never super popular with girls as far as I know.
Pop music only requires four chords. So you can be impressing bitches in six months.
Musicians who play the most difficult music rarely get noticed because its not popular. It requires more thinking to appreciate and is mostly only valued by intellectuals AKA not hot young babes.
I play 4 instruments but it only helps with girls if youre playing pop songs. My jazz arpeggio practice gathers hither no bitches indeed.
Mostly in the last five years. Mostly because I’ve gotten more confident in my abilities, in the past I would never showcase it. Thanks for reading
Since the ukulele is so easy, I got laid after I’d only played it for 2 or 3 months
Chip, maybe on your bio you should add “embracing” the curvature of a beautiful female body…
Good post, been a musican (pianist) for 15 odd years and yes, it’s always a good string to your bow if you will excuse the pun. Just remember that to play like the guys on the record will take time and patience, so when your fingers are hurting and your head aching push on and don’t quit, you will get there! As an aside, you can use music to pick up chicks, but as ever, confidence is key. The OP got a bang from a video where he was showing off (if you are going to be a sucessful musician you have to be an unshamed show off), so make sure that you run your usual game. Never be afraid of showing what you can do.
Beating an bitching girlfriend with a musical instrument would help a lot to start a good day…
Opinions are like assholes…
Hey, every man should at least try out for the Navy SEALs, fought at least one cage fight, read the entire canyon of Western literature, bench press 200 lbs, eat only organic food, drink fluoride free water, have slept with at least ten women, and earn at least 100k a year while wearing a tailored Hugo Boss suit.
But some of us have other shit to do, like jobs and responsibilities…
Bench 200? Do you even lift bro?
Nah, but as an ex-gymnast I can still manage an iron cross on the rings–something I’m far more proud of than benching some arbitrary number up and down in one single predictable dimension.
I also dabbled in Judo on the side during this time and let me guarantee you this: lifting weights does fuck all for your grappling skills. It gives you only a very limited and predictable type of stiffened strength that is easily circumvented by changing the angle of attack or just simply persisting until those big muscles fatigue and gas out, as they always do after 60 seconds.
Lifting weights is the only thing that gives any reliable strength gains at all. Nobody claims that is improves grappling skills; it simply amplifies the power of all your movements. There is no such thing as “stiffened strength” and many judo players do bodybuilding style training.
When you introduce odd environments, objects and injuries, that’s when big muscles really start to shine. Once an emaciated black belt loses one arm, he will be done. The bodybuilder can still wield heavy weapons, throw knockout punches or shove someone against a wall with one intact arm. He can also use that large arm to protect his neck and head from blows better than a twig arm would, because the surface area is bigger. It’s better to take the hit or stab in a massive shoulder or arm than one’s heart or face.
Judo is also very heavy on gripping combined with twisting and pulling. The only reliable way to increase grip strength over time is to lift weights incorporating special exercises that work the grip and forearm strength. This kind of strength is developed to the max in the sport of arm wrestling where they concentrate almost exclusively on arm and hand strength. That means they do tons of different curls, pull-ups and other exercises to build the muscles. Arm wrestling is also a technical sport where you can change the angle of your ‘attack’ or simply persist but that’s not gonna save you if you don’t lift hard and intelligently.
I don’t think you’ve done martial arts if you think grapplers are big weight trainers.
But don’t let that stop you from claiming to be a black belt BJJ champion who trains Navy SEALs in his spare time.
Stiff strength means precisely that; stiffened, limited movements due to conditioning your muscles to behave that way under heavy weights in single dimensions. Not gonna help you much in your ground game.
@ Conan I agree, there’s so many hobbies and skills out there; the main only reason I stuck with music is because I developed a passion for it and it was fun for me. Thanks for reading
This is so true. If I had stuck with the trumpet from back in the day, who knows how awesome I would be at it by now. It almost hurts to think about it really.
You would be dead from a brain aneurism like all great trumpet players.
After my youngest took a huge interest in marching band and various band activities in her school. I find that I am better off being a consumer of their concerts rather than trying to learn how to play anything. I get to travel for competition, I volunteer to help “pit” band equipment, so I get a workout, I get to spend additional father daughter time with her at her events, and the past couple exclusive concert events had original music with original conductors. I love my prodigy child, so lacking learning a skill at music, I will get the benefits of being involved in her band activities.
You’re a good father.
May God bless your family
eehhh, I am just Dad who doesn’t have any musical ability. But I am an involved Dad with my kids. The other band members in her high school, less than 20 percent of so do ANYTHING with their kids, much less take time to come out for an hour to just see an at home concert… No wonder kids are so fucked up. Parents oF ALL AGES do very little to support their kids.. Shit many of them don’t even show up to pick them up from school events practices and concerts, and seldom show up for marching band away events. I have personally seen involved parents be 200 times more supportive of other families color guard and band members..its sickening. But on the other hand, those kids that do not get any support at home from self indulgent “parents”, are HUGELY grateful when other parents extend a helping supportive hands. Our future is in the toilet for sure, so many abandoned kids so any abandoned teens. No wonder they turn fag and crazy in school.
Good subject matter, bad article.
Professional musicians do indeed get laid with the used up whores who frequent the music clubs, as well as the dancers and other ‘acts’ who appear on stage- but its only after years of honing their skill.
Now it can be a cool hobby, but to suggest to the younger RP neophytes who frequent this site whom just want to get laid, that you pick up a guitar an hour a night and will instantly be in poosy paradise is irresponsible. You’ve gotta want to master the instrument for you and love the endless practising. Otherwise it’s a tiring, time consuming hobby with little ROI, you could spend that time researching niches in the market to exploit and it would be far more profitable use of your efforts.
Saying that learning to play something will remap your neural pathways and definitely increase your brainpower… if you weren’t attempting to master anything else in the first place.
I fuck around with a grand piano at work for about 30 minutes a few times a week. I’m not interested in learning to read music so I just use a program called ‘synthesia’.
After my first hour I returned at my desk and felt the urge to draw, something I’ve always been terrible at. Imagine my surprise that after only an hour playing keys I can create beautiful drawings and lines straighter than a ruler to this day.
Perhaps you missed the last paragraph. The “sex appeal,” however it may be perceived, of playing music is just a bonus in my eyes. Thanks for your feedback
Even if you aren’t a European-American, Native Ground Books & Music has some interesting stuff.
https://nativeground.com/free-stuff/video-lessons/
Esther
“Every man should learn how to play a musical instrument.”
And if I refuse?
If you refuse? Then some self-important faggot who believes himself qualified to set the bench mark of masculinity will wag his self-righteous finger at you and call you a, wait for it…, Beta Male!
I once read a post from a self-described incel who was a professional drummer for a rock band. He’d been a professional drummer for over 20 years. And he was a virgin. Couldn’t get laid no matter what.
He didn’t give any reason why. Didn’t indicate that he had any deformities or other unusual problems. Just that he was no good with women. So apparently, being a musician is no guarantee. Though until I read his post, I would have thought otherwise.
Maybe when women started talking to him, they sensed something Beta or Gamma about his personality?
It’s not the ability per se to play the instrument that draws the female attention. It’s social proof. You are entertaining people by doing something not every man can do. You have perceived importance and status.
When my wife met me a long time ago, I was a lead guitarist in a local band. I don’t think we ever had more than 15 0r 20 people come to our shows. But my wife brought her friends along and her status went up in the group. I also “had something going on’ which kept me occupied and made me interesting to her. Could have just as well been a triathlete or starting a business. You have to have something cool going on.
Long story short, still married many years later. Anytime I break out the guitar-at a campfire, with a bunch of old friends or even in front of kids– I get that look from her again.
Lost me at “Every Man Should” …. ;-(
Howzabout
Every Man Should Have Ten Million Dollars
Every Man Should Look Like Apollo
Every Man Should Fuck Like Rocco Siffredi
Every Man Should Be Able to Suffer a Woman’s Endless Bullshit
Every Man Should Spend 24 Hours a Day Giving Chicks Free Stuff and Attention
Every Man Should Give His Assets Over to Animal Immigrants
Every Man Should Destroy His Health in Military Service
Every Man Should Give Away All His Wealth to Taxes
Gee…
See how easy it is to be a ROK Writer!