A lot of men who start out reading about game will end up in a complacent cycle of mental masturbation. There are so many different theories and philosophies out there that it becomes more of a hobby to learn new concepts than it is to actually go out and game.

A lot of it has to do with lack of contemplation in one’s life. The inner-framework of one’s mind should be thoroughly inspected, so the fear’s in the individual’s life can be understood and eventually be alleviated. Meditation is one of the quickest ways to erase the walls of social conditioning that have held most of us back from the many years that they’ve been built. It’s a tool that will help you understand the essence of your “ego.” The deeper you go with it, the more you will understand that the identity you think you are isn’t actually who you are.

The little voice in your head who claims to be “I” will becomes obnoxious and redundant the more you realize that you’re “its” master than the other way around. That might or might not click with some of you right away, but I can assure you that the more you contemplate “who you are” through the lens of meditation, your overall life and game will improve dramatically.

A lot of the common issues that most men face starting out with game will become irrelevant once one has become familiar with the state of “meditation.” For example:

1. Approach anxiety

Meditation has been shown to reduce anxiety by 40-55% in the beginning stages of practice. The better you get, the less anxiety you will obviously have. The only thing that rejection can affect is your “ego.” Meditation will help to unfold your “ego” for what it truly is and put you inside of a relaxed trance. It will help to allay your approach anxiety almost completely.

2. You will naturally be able to produce good emotions

We’ve all had times in our lives where our emotional state was low. This is especially true for guys who are new to the game. The negative emotions (usually coming from a place of neediness) will act like a haystack in a desert. As they roll, they will grow. You will most likely try to drown your fears with external substances in hopes that your confidence will come back to a steady state. Sometimes it works, a lot of times it doesn’t. Meditation will bring out the good emotions (or confidence) inside of you naturally. Even if you’re having a really “off” night, at the least you will be able to pull yourself together in neutral state.

3. Attraction will rise in females

That claim might be bold, but it’s true. Most of the men in our Western society are trapped inside of their heads. It’s very rare to sit down and have a conversation with someone who doesn’t have a thousand things on their minds. Everyone’s only listening to bits and pieces of what you’re saying, and thinking of what they’re going to say next. By being clear minded, not only will your dialogue be more creative, but you will be a much more enjoyable person to be around. Jokes will be funnier, vaginas will be wetter. When you’re in a state of presence (meditation), you will be an outlier compared to the average man. Good emotions, presence, plus dominance is the main foundation for all you really need to bag the women of your liking.

What kind of meditation will benefit you the most?

There are a variety of meditations to choose from (e.g., mindfulness, tummo, yoga, TM, etc.), so it might be confusing to pick one for those of you who are just starting out. All of them are to be respected, but I have found TM (transcendental meditation) to have the most compelling effects. It is extremely simple to learn, and very effective for trying to get in your “zone.”

A brief guide on how to practice TM

A. Find a place where you can sit in silence. It’s very rare that you’re going to meditate in a place that’s 100% quiet, and that’s perfectly fine.

B. Posture is irrelevant. The classic lotus position is uncomfortable after a while. Do what makes you comfortable—stand up, lay down, sit in a chair—all of these things are fine.

C. Pick a mantra for yourself. A mantra is a word, or phrase that will help you guide your thoughts back to “center.” Personally, I am a fan of the classic “So” and “Hum” mantra. But you can use any word(s) to your liking. (If you’re a Christian, or Catholic you might find it necessary to use the word “Amen,” or “Hallelujah.”)  As you inhale (slowly), string out the word “So”—or whatever word(s) you have chosen—in your mind, until you get to a point where you need to exhale. As you exhale slowly, string out the word “Hum” in your mind until your body feels it necessary to inhale again, and then repeat your mantra throughout the rest of your meditation session. Keep in mind that you’re saying your mantra inside of your head. It’s optional to exhale your mantra out loud if you wish (think of monks humming), but it really won’t make too much of a difference.

D. Understand that it’s quite normal for us to drift off into random tangents of thought. Your stomach might start growling, which will lead you to think about food. You could be thinking about work, bills, or whatever repetitive bore your mind wants to entertain. Those thoughts are going to help you in the long run. After awhile of fluctuating between the two (thoughts and the state of meditation), you will find it easier to differentiate between the two—meaning you will know how to access the “present moment” much quicker.

E.  A lot of people say that you should do meditation for 20 minutes a day, and 20 minutes a night. That’s a nice start, but if you’re able to put more time into your meditation practice, then I say do as much as you can.

F. This is only a basic outline to help get you started on your meditation journey. You’re most likely not going to become a Zen master your first meditation session, and that’s okay. The process shouldn’t be based on wanting immediate results, or be viewed as a chore. It should be viewed as something that is fun. It’s a subtle paradox in meditation that when you aren’t hungry for instant gratification you’re fed instant gratification.

Further Reading 

The Power Of Now by Eckhart Tolle. Though Tolle doesn’t focus on TM meditation specifically, you will find that the “present moment” is the exact same thing as the “transcendental” state.  Tolle does a wonderful job of putting into words a thing that cannot actually be put into words. The book was written in a way for the masses to easily comprehend, so this is a great guide for beginners to start on their meditation journey.

Conclusion

As you start learning more and more about Eastern philosophy or meditation, you might end up wanting to make it a goal to remove the “ego” within yourself completely. That’s not really necessary at all. As a matter of fact, I read somewhere a long time ago that there were Hindu “prophets” who focused so hard on repressing their thoughts to the point where eventually their personalities were identical to a “stone.” If that’s what enlightenment entails, then it doesn’t really seem like something that’s worth pursuing.

Instead, keep a steady balance with your meditation practices and your thoughts. The goal is to understand the fears in your heart, rather than to run from them. To let go of all of your beliefs for a trial of time to see that not even hell can burn you with your shield of peace and felicity. The women you come in contact with will have no other option, but to think that you’re a god.

Read More: How Buddhism Can Help Your Game