I currently operate as a personal trainer on the side. In the training world it’s said that maintaining your business is harder than building it. And this seems backwards to most new trainers. Doesn’t acquiring new clients seems a lot harder than holding onto a group of existing clients?
This seemingly paradoxical statement is true because of the mindset that someone takes on once he’s established his business and reached his target number of clients per week. The natural tendency is to altogether stop approaching new prospects and pursuing potential leads. The result of this tendency is a complete cutoff in the new clientele pipeline.
When you combine this cutoff with the natural decline in your current clientele – people move, decide to stop training, etc. all the time – you’re left with a business that is bound to enter a steady decline. The business is destined to fail if the trainer isn’t pursuing a small amount of new leads as he conducts his daily business.
How to maintain a steady flow of clients indefinitely
Therefore, what separates a successful trainer from a poor one is his prospecting process. Rather than neglecting it completely when things are going well, he never fully takes his foot off the pedal. Sure, if his schedule is completely packed with clients, he won’t be spending significant amounts of time pursuing new leads, but he will do so here and there, just so he has someone ready to jump into a new slot the moment one of his regulars ditches him.
The X factor that makes this strategy necessary is the fact that when a trainer gets out of the swing of things – he stops his prospecting process completely – he will surely struggle to pick up new clients efficiently when the shit hits the fan and he needs to. By taking a break from the practice of generating inbound traffic, he essentially loses his game.
Dealing with women is no different
This reality struck me one day when a fellow trainer was bitching about, well, bitches. Attempting to offer instruction, I instinctively told him to treat the dating market like he treats his training business. Girls he finds attractive and wants to date are prospects, and girls he’s dating already are clients.
This trainer happened to be the top trainer at the gym. By far. He dominates his training business like no other. Of course, this analogy brought a smile to his face as he realized he could apply his successful training model to women.
The obvious lesson here is to never stop approaching. If you have a three girls rotation that you’re completely satisfied with, realize that one of these girls is going to fall off. She might push for commitment and bounce, she might meet another dude and lose interest, she might move, etc. By continuing to approach cute girls you notice, you’ll keep your pipeline full so that when one, or all, of your current clients dry up, you can move quickly to replace them.
One objection to this model is when you have a girlfriend. And this is a legitimate concern. Surely you shouldn’t prospect while in a monogamous relationship, right? In truth, it’s up to you. Just realize the dangers of ceasing to approach: when the relationship ends, you’ll likely have lost a lot of your game. I’m sure most of you can already attest to this.
Seeing game as a sales process also removes unwanted emotions
At the same time that this model reminds you of the importance of prospecting, this realization brought a further increase in success to my personal dating life. By thinking of dating as a sales job, I truly was able to realize that dating is a numbers game. This effectively removed most of the unwanted emotions I normally felt when a girl I really liked fell through the cracks.
When you view game as sales, you recognize that most prospects aren’t going to pan out. However, you don’t use this as ammo to be a bitch and cry yourself to sleep, but rather as ammo to get out there and approach even more women. After all, a solid prospecting process is the mark of a successful salesman.
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Read More: Don’t Let Women Rule Your Life
Fellow ROKers, I agree with the law of numbers regarding game. However, what is said on the approach is key. With what lines do you find most success?
Personally I find direct day game most effective. I approach a woman on the street, in a coffee shop or store and say “I just saw you and thought you were stunning. I was wondering if you’re friendly too?” This directness disarms them and their bitch shields are usually too confused to activate. And it shows confidence and fearlessness on your part — you have stated your intentions up front in a charming way, and such an approach is rare and very attractive to women used to being gamed with lines. Roosh has a very good book on Day Game. And I personally rely on Charlie Valentino’s books on direct game, available on Amazon. They are short and to the point — and most importantly, they work. Happy hunting.
Thanks, I like that line. I know chicks love it when you’re direct. They like guys who have guts, and that catches them off guard. I have approached girls with “I had to come over and tell you are gorgeous” many times, but with your added tongue-in-cheek I will use a variable and plunder!
They can’t say NO to that question.
It’s a positive invitation.
Yes of course I’m friendly!
Do you do this all the time?
The worst you’ll hear is this sort of thing:
Er what are you doing?
I would say, yes, but not to you.
Honey, this is a site for men. Why don’t you go play on some lesbian infested feminist site?
It’s also a good alpha bait-and-switch. At first you come off as beta due to complimenting her appearance, then bam! You make her qualify herself and show you she’s friendly.
Is she a dog? “Is it friendly? Can I offer it?” What the eff is wrong with you?
Happy hunting? Fuck you, you pathetic loser.
Lesbian.
I had about 200 first dates between my first and second marriages. I was not looking to fill a rotation, I was looking for a worthy wife.
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The direct approach worked well for me as well. The dates could be a simple as having a cup of coffee. The important thing for the man to do is to LISTEN. They will almost always tell you that the are a psycho if you will just LISTEN for about 15 minutes.
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Out of those 200 or so first dates, there were only about 10 second dates. After my bitch-attorney-first-wife I had very little tolerance for self-absorbed psycho women. They will ALWAYS throw up major red flags regarding their weirdness and 90% or more of the time, they’ll do this within the first 15 minutes of encouraging them to talk about themselves.
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Ask them questions and encourage them to keep talking by asking more questions about the story they’re telling you. Most women cannot resist this kind of attention, and they will tell you everything you need to know about whether or not you should continue to pursue them. If it turns out you don’t like them, just end the conversation with, “Well it has been nice talking to you this (morning/evening/whatever).” and move on. She’ll probably smile the next time she sees you, and increase your status among anyone who sees her do it.
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Want a lot of dates? Don’t put too much value in them. It doesn’t have to be steak and tails followed by a ride I your Porsche to a concert by whatever brainless band she likes.
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See an attractive woman with no ring at Panera? Find something, anything you like about what she says or how she dresses, anything, and tell her you admire that thing about her.
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Don’t stop there and leave her hanging, you have to ask for the close. It is really simple.
“Would you mind if I join you for a cup of coffee?” (Pay for her damned coffee!)
“Could I meet you for a drink tonight at >>>>>>?”
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If she says no ,no harm done. You are selling yourself, and you have to be able to accept rejection with a smile and a kind voice. Too many men won’t pursue attractive women because of fear of rejection. The best way to defeat this fear is to simply experience several rejections. Trust me, the pain of rejection decreases dramatically with each successive one.
What?! You came across an attorney too?!? That’s wild!!
Also, that was some very sage advice. Rejection is the mother of success. Too many people choose not to accept this fact and opt to be stillborns instead.
Kind words and high praise.
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Thank you.
Direct game works better because most of you don’t really know how to use indirect. For example C&F and push-pull are DIRECT game. Indirect takes much more social awareness which takes most men years to develop and it’s just too hard for most men.
“Hi”.
Sounds like pass completion rate in Soccer. Back passes, side pass, forward pass, crosses… Except you can only expect 5% to be accurate instead of 75% or whatever.
Don’t you mean “football”?
It is no wonder the US has such high rates of depression, alcoholism, etc. our “dating” culture forces people to become sociopaths that view other human beings as a statistic. It isn’t very satisfying knowing the woman you are with is just waiting for the next guy to keep her entertained once the new wears off of you and she starts to see you as a real person. And women wonder why men objectify them and stay distant emotionally; there is no choice.
It is probably naturally this way no matter what but I have a feeling cultures that don’t promote so much promiscuity are probably healthier psychologically.
Good points. And where is love in all of this?
Is dating a market, a business? Oh dear America, what you’ve done.
This isn’t America, this is the freaks on this website.
“This isn’t America, this is the freaks on this website”
Wrong. It IS America. The ‘feaks’ here are simply telling it like it is.
I pity you.
While it may naturally be this way at the profound instinctive level, harsh reality and the need to make serious choices leading to severe consequences when done badly forced people in more “natural” environments to pair up and stick to it for the most part. The artificial kind of mousetopia that has been created in America (for the female mouse) has led to this severe imbalance and the resulting mess that we are now witnessing. Whatever happens, it will not end well if nature does not reassert itself. Or maybe Brazil is our destiny after all. Who knows?
Yep, the consequences of birth control and government welfare programs has basically resulted in the destruction of communities and families. Women used to be encouraged not to sleep around because the consequence was an unwanted pregnancy, now that is not a problem and the subsequent sleeping around makes them incapable of actually staying loyal to one man and raising children.
The difference in the older generations is remarkable, for example I have an aunt whose husband served in Vietnam and came back with severe PTSD and rarely leaves the house – she has been miserable for the last 40+years and she still would never divorce because in her mind her husband is family. Women today do not view a husband as family, he is more like a boyfriend that can be replaced whenever for whatever reason.
Sociopaths? A tad over-egged.
Are you kidding me? That’s what you got from this? This article is literally about you barely pubescent losers doing that women, not the other way around. You have a seriously warped world view.
blue piller
Sadly after I separated from a wife of 20+ years I waded into the dating pool and the article is spot on. From barely 21 year olds to 40 old professional players, they are all the same. Vapid, shallow, cunning, deceiving, cunts who will spend least amount of effort for the most amount of gain. Caught one scheduling a new date while she was out with me. Even the older women in my community shake their heads at what things have become. When you see Woodstock party girls get disgusted at things, you know its hitting rock bottom. They are all testers, not an investor in the bunch. Play, have fun, love em and leave em. If you find one that’s a keeper, proceed with extreme caution. They whine for a real man but what they really want is the human version of a punching bag or a tampon, easy sex, shiny shoes and a warm bed for the moment until they find someone new to play with.
Of course, not even the fittest of inner-gamers can indefinitely maintain interest to be constantly (and vainly) kicking life into 100% passive, non-responsive dragarounds… if he is doomed to live in a country riddled with women in whom the moribund traits are even more dominant (lol) than elsewhere in the world.
I am out of the “dating game” far too long to give any sound advice, but the economic advice in this article is flawed:
To summarize:
(1) you need a constant flow of new clients, as you never know when they leave
Well, true, but as I do have an one-time business, you need to decide if you are a one-time player. I leave all my clients satisfied, but I know they will never come back (due to the one-time need I fulfil). This is not a game situation.
(2) “what separates a successful trainer from a poor one is his prospecting process”
No. It’s good business in an economic sense, but it will never be in any other sense. As said, I have one-time clients and I like all of them to leave willing to come for more, but just have no need for it. Some do develop new needs and do come back, and this is what the gaming advice should be: Whatever your “client” wants, give them what you have to give. If you are as good as you think, they will come back for more. But “more” will be more as they wanted earlier – this is good business.
The advice in the article reads as if “you’re selling shit anyway, so be on the look for new customers because your present customers will realize you for the shit you are sooner or later”.
So, business-based advice from the guy who won’t answer any responses because he’ll fly to his yacht tomorrow:
If you sell shirts, and she wants a shirt, sell the shirt yu think it’s best, make sure she loves the shirt, but keep in mind to also tell her that you do have more expensive, even better shirts to sell _after_ you made sure the shirt you sold was the best they ever had. _This_ is real business.
Economics is comparable to game, but not to relationships: If you want to fuck women, offer what you have and try to sell it. If you – with this strategy – want to really “have” a woman, youl’l always need to have more to “sell”. Which you, at one point, will not have, so this is a bad strategy.
This is why I hate people comparing economics to social relations.
But yes, for dating game economics are great: Make her want it, she’ll buy it. But, if your business is just promises and no real backing, she’ll be gone as fast as she came. Just as clients will if you don’t fulfil their needs.
Good article Jefe. Even when you have a steady supply of sex, constantly hitting on new girls accomplishes 2 things: 1) keeps you in practice in case your pool dries up 2) your main bitch(es) sense that you are always on the hunt, reminding them that they are replaceable.
Wise words. I’ve taken a similar approach and its given me great success.
Yes people, this is the article that is ruining America. This one right here. We no longer stand a chance.
That’s right, an internet article giving advice to men on how to deal with today’s dating prospects is going to be the death blow to America.
Yes, definitely, an article like this will cause panic in the streets, men going crazy, women will be brutalized, called rude names, and no more men buying them free drinks.
Oh, the humanity!
It’s disgusting. It shows no value to a woman or relationship, and that’s why you people are pathetic and alone and on some blog talking about “game.”
Listen Honey…
I think you fail to realize that when you attack the men on this forum with your rhetorical cries and exclamations, that you are talking to men who have long done away with the need to react or respond to a women’s attempt to create shame and guilt. When you decide to talk to us with logic and reason, then we will be open to discussion.
She sounds like an angry lesbian.
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Nice reply (and accurate).
When I have a girlfriend is when I wind up with the largest number of prospects. A wonderful problem to have.
… You’ve had a girlfriend? Poor girl what was going on in her head?
Same way but then I get a jackpot on slot machines, and on next morning , there no girlfriend and no money. After that **** I reveal poker to myself. Nowadays no sloth machines, only poker http://www.let-poker.com/
Nice article from a sensible author with some valuable bits, as always.
Honestly, you abdicate your right to complain about women’s behavior with this scheme.
get back your ex http://bit.ly/1l2A7rc