Ovid wrote the first PUA literature, around 3AD. (It was 1970 before the next book appeared, Eric Weber’s How To Pick Up Girls!) About two years later, Ovid wrote Love’s Remedy, about NEXTing the Roman way. This should work for exes, those soon to be, and all those ONEitis cases that frequently motivate guys to start learning game.
Distilled from flowery Latin verse full of mythological allusions (and my personal commentary added), here are the bare essentials of washing that broad right outta your hair.
Prevention
Think with the right head.
If you know it’s going to end badly, it’s best to put an end to it in the beginning. Love’s Remedy emphasized not letting the little head do the thinking. It’s a lot harder to break things off if your doomed crush takes root and turns into full-blown heartbreak.
I’ll add that when it’s uncertain if someone will take you seriously, know when to cut your losses. If you’re too optimistic (a frequent hazard for guys), you’ll waste your time and get hurt feelings. Giving up too easily is also bad; defeatist mentality is another Inner Game problem. Let good judgment be your guide in this balance. Further, if chasing someone gets you nowhere, quit chasing her. You might get better results, and if not, at least you’ve cut your losses.
Let things cool down
Get away from it all and catch some other sights.
If you’re already besotted, you might have to wait for a while and distract yourself. Until you’re ready to take off the rose-colored glasses, preoccupy yourself with work or some other constructive pursuit. Staying busy will keep you from grinding your mental gears.
Some of the examples Ovid throws out there include running for office, taking part in warlike exercises (martial arts or working out should do), or fighting the Parthians. (The Middle East is still a mess, two millennia later. A tour of duty in the sandbox—unless you’re opposed—certainly takes your mind off of anyone who won’t have the common courtesy to mail you a Dear John letter.) Ovid also recommends taking up farming; gardening should work if you can’t afford 40 acres and a tractor. He wrote longingly of the rustic lifestyle, much like Seneca, and also recommends hunting and fishing as other distracting pursuits. A long vacation does wonders.
All that’s difficult if you’re suffering heartbreak. Consider it like taking a bitter pill. Ovid recommends not bothering with magic spells; so no New Age stuff there. Just butch up.
She’s not perfect
Same chick!
Now remind yourself of her flaws:
Say to yourself, “She has filched from me this thing and that and, not content with larceny, her extravagance has compelled me to sell my patrimony. What vows she made, and how often has she broken them! How often has she left me lying before her door! To others she gives her love, to me only her disdain. A common broker enjoys with her the nights of love which she refuses me.” Let all these grievances embitter your feelings towards her. Recall them incessantly to your mind, and let them sow the seeds of hatred in it. And when you reproach her, may you wax eloquent; but if only you grieve enough, eloquent you will be without an effort.
Epic! I’ll also add that a slut is someone who sleeps with anyone, while a bitch is someone who sleeps with anyone except you. So if you’re a man of accomplishment, and someone who won’t consider you gives it up for losers with room temperature IQs, she’s a bitch with fleas.
Ovid recounts a personal anecdote, where he thought over how much he didn’t like the appearance of a “certain wench,” even though he had to use his imagination as he didn’t find anything objectively ugly about her. And then:
“What a lot of money she wants.” And that was, indeed, the main count in the indictment.
Ooh burn! He recommends exaggerating any traits of hers which really are bad. If she lacks sparkle in certain areas, have her demonstrate her lack of talent. If possible, have a good look at her some time without fancy clothes and makeup, or with a mudpack on her face. (If not possible, you can always imagine it.)
Find someone else
After unloading some ammo at his critics (we understand), Ovid recommends (in a roundabout way) getting some outside action before your hot date with Miss Wrong. Further, if she has a strange-looking cookie or “fish taco syndrome”, see above about “she’s not perfect”.
In any event, Ovid wasn’t a big believer in monogamy:
I would counsel you also to have two mistresses at a time. If you could have more, it would be still better.
That one’s going to be controversial. Still, on the plus side, that’s quite a way to achieve abundance mentality.
Keep it cool
Another good one:
…[W]hen your despairing heart is consumed with a passion fiercer than the fires of Aetna, act in such a manner that your mistress may deem you colder than ice. Pretend that you are cured, and if your heart still bleeds, never let her suspect it. Let laughter be upon your lips, though tears be in your heart.
We agree. One of the first game mistakes that recovering AFCs must unlearn is supplication. In this instance, holding frame keeps things graceful if you have to break up. I’ll add that it’s extremely helpful if you’re NEXTing someone who’s merely been toying with your affections.
Further, if someone stands you up for a planned hot date, act like it doesn’t bother you, so it doesn’t “push her pride to the point of disdain“. (Yes, flaking is as old as the Roman Empire!) If she wants you back after that, forget it; bang someone else next time.
Calling it quits
In any case, you’d better be firm, or you’re sunk. If you haven’t had enough yet, hang out with her until you’re sick of her. A modern proverb goes that for every “perfect 10“, there’s a guy who’s tired of dealing with her crap.
Also, don’t be alone when you’re despairing; hang out with your friends instead. Until the crisis has passed, avoid the love-stricken like yourself, as well as happy couples. Keep away from the chick you’re trying to get over, her family, and her friends. Don’t ask about her. (These days, this means no lurking on social media.) Don’t even talk about how you’re over her; a gradual NEXTing is better.
When you’re ready, cultivate indifference rather than resentment; she’s now merely an acquaintance. No angry confrontations either. Still, it’s still okay to remind yourself what a flake she is. Ovid recommends getting rid of your love letters. (This advice is obsolete today. Saving those emails and text messages could save your ass.) Also, avoid places that will remind you of her.
Final notes
The following are somewhat modified from the original, though in the same spirit.
Don’t flaunt your wealth; instead, let her think you’re broke. Don’t get aggro with her past or present boyfriends; they know what a pain in the ass she is now anyway. Eat a moderate diet. You’re allowed to get shit-faced drunk. (I recommend only once—okay, fine, one week.) I’ll further add, go find ten other women.
Read More: Why “Nexting” Unsuitable Women Is Good For Your Sex Life
Anyone else grew up without a father to teach him all of this shit and finds it kind of funny, kind of sad that some faceless mentors on the internet are teaching him how to master these games women play with us?
At least you found out at some point. Think about all the beta males that’ll have to learn this the hard way.
A lot of them won’t learn.
Took the words out of my handsome mouth.
They would find themselves Lucky and be thankful to GOD that they at least have someone to Guide them & save their ass !!
Present.
I was 17. He was distant as shit anyway.
This shit is a bear to learn online.
Wish there was local neo-masculine community. Blue-pill everywhere you look. What a mess.
@cuckslayer, I think often about exactly what you wrote and what @teethgrinder replied. It amazes me what lines of utter bullshit we men are fed by popular culture. I appreciate that ROK and a few other websites that have opened my eyes to what I knew viscerally but could never have articulated.
I grew up with my dad, but he didn’t teach me anything about “all this shit” So I’m super grateful to all the “faceless” mentors, who really saved me.
I’d probably killed myself sooner or later here in this bluepill hellhole / cuckistan of Germany 😛 I’m currently removing the last bits of indoctrination but I still need an escape plan.
And still searching for any part of Europe which is not cucked (but has a good economy)
Cuckslayer, I agree with you completely. This website was great years ago but now I feel like every author is a “master of the obvious” or the articles are intended for college kids. We need actionable articles to bring us together rather than waste our time with things we already know. Maybe some articles can be designated by roosh for 20 and under readers. If a girl isn’t into you go find another one, simple as that.
Remember it’s only obvious to YOU due to your countless years in the manossphere..for many this is,incredible enough, news..
Yes, but… archives. No need to repeat. These days I only visit ROK to read comments by people who are red pilled. From spending the day in an office surrounded by betas I need that quick testosterone boost, or sanity check, and sites like this let me know that people like me still exist.
I used to come for innovative game tips to make game fun again, you know, shit to try out, like shaking her hand and not letting go until she does to test how hot for you she is (based on first impressions). Shit like that. I want more creativity here, hell, even games to try out, like ‘Recover from this opener: “..” and film it.’ I don’t need new venues, just new tactics, or tips, because the game’s always changing.
Well, it’s Roosh’s strategy to attract writters paid on $10 litcoins. Obviously, quantity over quality is not a good idea from readers perspective, but, the Iranian is happy, so….😀
I wrote this to bring forth some knowledge from the ancient world which is still of use today. If the advice is no good, you’ll have to talk to an acclaimed Roman poet about that one.
BTW, I wrote it for free; it’s just a gift to the community.
Thank you for writing this, I love characters from distant history, brothers from another time. We are still the same animals…
@Soy…
Do you really think the Writers are doing this for $10 litcoins !? And what’s wrong in having a “strategy” to attract Writers & Audience, with an intention to Inform, Share, Guide, Support, Build a Network, Earn livelihood etc. !?
And why you are so desperate to mention about Roosh’s nationality !?
Guess what, you moron; Nobody is interested in nationality of Roosh or anybody else. We are MEN first, anything else is either irrelevant or of little/no concern.
Soy’s comment was less about content and more about being able to be a dick attacking Roosh and the website. Its that pure liberal passive aggressive nonsense.
As others have said, the ‘common sense’ articles are to attract and introduce normies to the RP. If you’re after ‘advanced RP concepts’ check out some of this site’s author’s personal websites.
I recommend Libertas’ https://masculineepic.com/
Imagine how she will look at 40, and remember the older you get the easier it gets, the power balance shifts. It is propaganda that your twenties is a man’s prime, men peak later whereas your average female is physically in her prime in her teens and in the danger zone if she isn’t wed by her thirties. If you are in decent shape in your thirties, forties or fifties and have a little to show for yourself the pool is wider. If you don’t, go abroad or use prostitutes.
Must agree. I was a fat kid my entire adolescence. Lost weight, switched to veganism( so many wrong myths, can’t recommend it enough), and now, in my late 30s, I’m killing it.
3 to 4 scale femmes appreciate your “killing it” attentions too….
I may not kill it on RoK, but I guess not speaking English as your mother language has its drawbacks, despite that I’m actually quite honest, so I’m fine with any criticism.
Great post, much needed for dealing with a manipulative ex at the moment.
No matter what problem you might have just go out and have a walk for a few hours. Preferably 5 to 6 hours. It has a very calming effect.
Once you’ve reached half of your planned journey have a 10 minutes break at a coffee shop.
Now it’s time to return home, but on a different road.
After 6 hours of marathon you are finally home. Your brain is more relaxed and your problem is almost gone.
Now, its time for a beer, a nice Italian pasta, and some country music.
At this point you are a patriot again.
PS. I’ve tried this recipe many times and I can assure you that it works marvelously.
It doesnt calm me because of women glued to their iphone pretending the world (and me) doesnt exists for no other reason than to feel above everyone else.
The gym has the same problem but at least I know I’m doing something that will prepare me for the final exodus.
Exactly ! and these women aren’t even grateful to the MEN who made IT possible (Smartphone !) !!
@Johnny Cash
Amen to that, brother, this song always cheers me up after a good old walk across the hills and valleys.
Its that smart redirect that keeps a cooler smarter head our of the local clink and clank jail. Great positive helpful post.
The best way to get over a chick is to get yourself under another chick.
Preferably a nice hot Polish one!!!
And especially when she smiles sweetly and says “Nuzhnem kielbasa!”
“Kurwa”… Zgadzam się!!! 😉
Not for everyone, but when my first wife left me I was still young and she had been my first, I was gutted and in the army. One of the lads showed up with a few beers and offered to help me clean up my quarters for hand over, three beers in he said ‘Fuck it,lets go to Hannover.’ We drove down and he took me to a whore house and paid for the best whore in the place. Man, I’ve never been heart broken since.
Marvelous spot-on article for everyone. Being able to next people in your life is difficult, whether it be a family member or an annoying friend who is a dragger and will not get out of their own way. I’ll tell you something once, if you choose to ignore my advice and continue on your stupid ass way, I never will mention it again.
Law 10: INFECTION: AVOID THE UNHAPPY AND UNLUCKY. You can die from someone else’s misery—emotional states are as infectious as diseases. You may feel you are helping the drowning man but you are only precipitating your own disaster. The unfortunate sometimes draw misfortune on themselves; they will also draw it on you.
Your happiness should not solely depend on another person. Be the master of your soul. Stay calm, be rational. If you are broken-hearted, fine, let that pain flow through you and out. Then be done with it and move on. Girls don’t like needy boys, ever. Sometimes a girl will break up with her boyfriend just to see if he will fight for their relationship. She is mightily surprised when he doesn’t! Then she thinks he’s a jerk but secretly regrets letting him go. So, how do you achieve this state of mind and heart, where other people can’t ruin your inner peace? You must have other pillars that support your life. A job you like. Hobbies, sports, outings in nature. Good friends who are not linked to your girlfriend. That way, if you lose a piece of your heart, enough of it remains that you can go on, alone, until it heals. Good luck.
Well nothing. Ew under the sun, we may sum it as a pump&dump mindset, since awalt and law biased against men. And remember there arent free rides either, you are going to pay women in a way or another, so better rent a d enjoy your life since words commitment and serious relationship are already lost in almost any womens vocabulary
Woman’s Constancy
BY JOHN DONNE
Now thou has loved me one whole day,
Tomorrow when you leav’st, what wilt thou say?
Wilt thou then antedate some new-made vow?
Or say that now
We are not just those persons which we were?
Or, that oaths made in reverential fear
Of Love, and his wrath, any may forswear?
Or, as true deaths true marriages untie,
So lovers’ contracts, images of those,
Bind but till sleep, death’s image, them unloose?
Or, your own end to justify,
For having purposed change and falsehood, you
Can have no way but falsehood to be true?
Vain lunatic, against these ‘scapes I could
Dispute and conquer, if I would,
Which I abstain to do,
For by tomorrow, I may think so too.