There is a commenter named Mark Minter who is dropping anti-marriage bombs all over the manosphere. His first hall of fame comment comes via Donlak:
This is the most ridiculous logic I have heard. To call someone a pussy that counsels not to get married because of the risk is blowhard bullshit. You have a 1 in 1,000,000 chance of dying when you leave the house. You have 1 in 2 chance of divorce. 1 in 2. My opinion and observation of data is that your odds are higher if you marry someone attractive. Higher still if you were a player. So go to a roulette wheel and bet 40% of all of your future income on the red or the black. Same thing. It depends on your definition of Game. Some say Game is proactive and allows you to get the best out of life. I think it is somewhat reactive. I say it is defensive. Game enables you to avoid Oneitis and to make sane and rational decisions, to not be dragged, tricked, or manipulated into marriage.
You ever been married for 17 years? I have. I know what it is like. I know the boredom you will experience. I know what it is like to be chained to a career that is not your choosing because of the financial pressures placed on you. I am a expert at mid 19th Russian history because my fucking wife went to bed early for 10 years. Ask me how much mid 19th century Russian history I have read since divorce. None. I spent this weekend watching every college game on TV.
The odds are you probably will end up divorced. You don’t know how to be married. You think you do and you think that Game might help to avoid divorce. Fuck off. The only way you will stay married is if she has no better alternative to you. And if you have no balls. If you are a nice little handyman, if you stand around and hold her coat and let her direct the movie, then she might just let you keep on being her slave. All this talk about Game saving you from divorce is pretty recent and to me, mighty suspect with what I know about being married. My opinion is that if you are a lion, then you will be divorced. If you are a mouse then you might be divorced. You have to toe the line of what women think is the “good dad” and you will have to subordinate yourself to the woman’s definition of the “greater good”. Both me and my brother-in-law were faced with a situation where both of us had vetted wives based on the fact that they would work. “Sure. Sure. We love to work. We’re modern women”. Then when the kids came both wives quit or got fired. They were both faced with some tough situations at work and both sat down. “My baby needs me.” Fuck that. She didn’t work anymore and used the convenient justification. Both, my brother-in-law and I freaked out. Both women felt absolutely justified. “People change. When I said I would work, I didn’t know the reality of how much I would want to be with my child.” You can say same about a ton of things, where you live, how much money is acceptable, how big a house. Also, my wife was supposed to inherit about 7 million dollars from her dad and then the dad re-married, out of the blue, right before he died, and the new wife took a great chunk of that money when the will was changed. My ex-wife figured, hey a few million isn’t enough for two people to live on so it is in her advantage to ditch this guy before her dad died.
Fine, marriage might work out for you. It probably won’t and you will fuck yourself bad. It happens to 1 in 2 men. 1 in fucking 2.
This might be the first time I have read this blog and I don’t know man, but I certainly will filter anything you might write after this. This is pure hyper macho “Real alphas aren’t afraid to marry”. Fine, get a revolver, but 3 bullets in it, spin the chamber, and put it to your head. Same thing, buddy. 1 in 2 man.
The essence of modern divorce law is that it changes the classical trade of surplus labor for sex. Once anyone can receive the benefit from any deal without supplying their part then you can bet your ass that they will use the situation to their advantage. Dalrock wrote last week that the modern church preaches that it is the duty of the woman to withhold sex to coerce her husband into acting “right” as she defines “right” to be. Fairness never enters into it. “He won’t go to Home Depot with me because I want to change all the light switches in the house because I don’t like them and he wants to watch stupid football instead”. That’s justification enough for her to withhold sex. Or “I’m too tired. I have my job and the kids.” or any 100s of reasons that the hamster will use to justify it and you can do nothing to keep it from happening. So then when she has starved you out for 6 months and then you look at porn after hours and hours of being alone, then “Aha, he looks a porn and I am justified in divorcing him”. The law gives the woman undue advantage legally and you are hoping she will listen to her better angels and not take advantage.
It not a lack of courage. It is prudentiality. You examine the rewards and you consider the risk as well as the potential loss. And just because you have read four blogs that say game your wife and she won’t leave you is not enough to make me forget that millions of men are tossed out into the street every year. You can read all you want about trading in Forex and think you are just the shit on trading the JPY-EUR pair and then lose your ass. Prudentiality or prudence, however you want to look at it, will allow to know a bad risk when you see it. Courage has nothing to do with judgement.
Your kidding yourself if you think you can eliminate risk by looking at age, education, parental history, and a bunch of factors. The only safe way is to not marry. And it is not a coward’s way out. You will be happier in the end when you are 55, 60, 70. I have been alone for two years now at 57. The lack of stress, of not having a bitch, of no abuse, of no arguments, no Home Depot, no stupid female bullshit is tremendous. My dad never remarried after my mom died. They fought for years throughout the whole marriage and she slept alone in another room for about 5 years before she died. No one was more Alpha then him. He partied a bit and she was always on his ass about it. Once she accused him of having a girlfriend and he said “Evelyn, you may not have cured me of drinking, but you damn sure cured me of women.” And he meant it. After she died, he never even had a girlfriend.
We all thought “Gosh, he must be lonely” He fucking wasn’t. He had ample money to do as he pleased and he did exactly that. I didn’t really know how happy he was to not have 5 kids up his ass all wanting something from him and a bitch on his back all the time. Until I did it.
He had sort of been a role model for me. I surely wanted to wait to marry, to not have a lot of kids, because even as a boy I figured out he was getting the shit end of the stick. I should have paid even better attention and never married.
Sure, when your in your 30s and early 40s, people will think there is something fucked with you because they all think old school, if you were worth a shit then a woman would want you or you would “man up”.
You have to leave all that bullshit thinking behind. Like it or not, this is a new era in mankind. Marriage is and will continue to be the first casualty of PostModernism.
You know what. I am going exactly the other direction from you. You are a pussy if you do marry. You are a coward that is falling for conditioning, that you need the social validation of it, that you are afraid that you will be alone when you are old, that you need to follow what you are told to do and man-up and meet your responsibilities, that you are afraid to stick your nose out there and continue to struggle to get what you want from women and from the world and you want a bitch to tell you what to do, that you are such a fucking wimp that you need a woman so you can lay your head on her chest and seek your mother like you were a little baby infant (Coco Chanel’s word about men, not mine).
Pussy.
He dropped another one on Rational Male:
I was reading the Red Pill Blog (It’s a very good blog if you have never read it. I highly recommend his article on The Female Social Matrix. It is very long. Here is a link to it:http://theredpillroom.blogspot.com/2012/05/female-social-matrix-introduction.html ). The writer is another guy that has been married for 21 years. One of his articles says you can’t be alpha part of the time. His wife says “Foreplay begins in the morning when your feet hit the floor after you wake up” He begins this list of things you should do:
That means being the leader every day.
That means being decisive in your leadership every day.
That means soliciting her opinions before you make a decision about something important, every day.
That means ensuring the health, safety, and welfare for your family every day.
That means household maintenance every day.
That means working out in some way, every day.
That means making at least three good DHV Alpha moves every day.
That means intriguing her sense of curiosity or wonder every day.
That means making her come to you, not the other way around, every day.And this is just a fragment of his list and I started thinking after reading about a third of the way through it, “Fuck it”. It’s such a load of shit to go through just to be with a woman. You just can’t “be” with one. There is always going to be this tension that you are going to be put through in one form or another. You either are the perfect little beta with a side of alpha that is the best little handyman or you have to now go through this contrived alpha shit that Ian Ironwood lists above.
its such a lot of shit to go through just to have some regular pussy. That’s not really even regular and it gets real tired. It is far better to fuck new pussy then your old tired ass wife and look that crap you have to go through to even get that.
And none of it is guaranteed to work and most of this is just conjecture. A few married guys that a “her-i-cane” hasn’t made “landfall” into his life and his marriage are like people living in Orlando telling people in southern Alabama how best to avoid a hurricane. Just because a major hurricane hasn’t hit Orlando doesn’t mean one won’t ever hit there.
I am 57. I am divorced. I live without a woman. I was sad and mad for about four years after the divorce. But now, not a day fucking goes by that I am not actually thankful that I don’t have that woman in my life. I don’t mean just a little bit thankful. I mean I am fucking giddy about it. Being happy is fucking easy. All you have to do to be happy is not be unhappy. I can’t really tell you how to be happy but I can fucking tell you how to be unhappy. Have a 55 year old wife. That’s how.
There are 3 women in their late forties or fifties that all three live right next to each other, right by me. I look at them and I am so glad I don’t have one of these beasts in my bed. My mother died way before my father and he never went with another woman. It wasn’t any devotion to her. He hated her. He was sick of her. She harangued and henpecked him for 40 or years. And he was alpha as mother fucker and he had all those good beta qualities of regularity and dependability that a woman could want in a man. He was 6’3″ 220 pound Sergeant-Major in the military that was about the meanest looking mother fucker you would see every week. He had a command voice that would freeze children in their tracks. I would run into his young troopers on the base when I was a teenager and when they found out who I was they would say “Your dad is a mean fucking asshole”. I would reply “You’re telling me something I don’t know. I’m his fucking son. Try that on for a while.” But no matter what, how alpha you are or what good alpha/beta mix you are there is still going to be something that is going to put a burr in that woman’s saddle. He was a good man and a good husband and still they ended up sleeping in different rooms.
All this ink and writing about how to be some alpha with some beta in you or a beta with some alpha in you is a fucking waste of time. There is no solution to this. Women and men are too far apart and there is no reconciliation. They have opinions that are rationalized, solipsistic, false, or generalized. They have the advantageous position of having a pussy that you want more than they want your dick, and they have the law, religion, and the media on their side. The highest rate of divorce is among interracial marriages of white woman and black men. And you know those relationships are the best example of women wanting to marry alpha dick and that is the only reason that the woman married the man.
Get it through your head, Men are from mars; women are FUCKING IDIOTS.
Never marry. Duh. Plate Theory. Duh. Game. Duh. Pump them, dump them, next them. Duh. THAT IS THE ONLY WAY TO WIN. Duh!!!!!
You have no idea how young you are going to feel when you are 57 and how old those women will be when they are 57. You will not feel a lick of shit older or different when you are 57. Your dick will work, your body will work. You will still be viable sexually. And that women will be a broken down piece of shit with a dead vagina and a body that would disgust you to see her naked much less fuck her. My ex-wife would be 50 years old right now and I have no idea how I could actually bring myself to fuck her knowing how she probably looks without clothes right now. Women say old men are pervs for wanting to fuck young girls. Fuck I would think it is perverted to fuck old women. It is natural as a motherfucker to want to fuck young women. Duh.
You can’t fucking win at this game. Get a fucking PS3. Get DirectTV. Get a lot of guy friends. Go fishing. Get some kind of Game be it alpha game or beta game to make them think you will be their sucker provider and then run away after you get the trim.
Whatever, just never marry. I am starting to get bored with this theme, how to be a better husband by being more alpha.
It won’t work.
You cannot look at a 40 year old women today and say that today’s thirty year old will be just like that when she is 40. You can’t even look at a 30 year old today and say today’s 20 year old will be like her. You have no idea what any of them are going to be like when they get older. The only reason women stayed with men in the past was because they had to and now they don’t and they won’t. Maybe if you are in the top 10% of income and your wife doesn’t work then she might stay with you.
There was this piece in The Atlantic a few days ago called “The Weaker Sex”. It profiled 3 women as something the female writer called the DWP club, divorced women professionals. It profiled 4 women, three were already divorced and loving it. They had fucking weekends off from kids. The Ex husbands came and got the kids. So they had female nirvana, money, independence, nobody trying to fuck them, and someone else to raise the kids on the weekends. The fourth had a househusband, who she fucking abused, and the writer made him look like a nitwit idiot and hinted this woman was well on the way to getting a divorce. All made mid six figure incomes. Women will only stay with you if they have to and they don’t have to any fucking more. Get it through your head. They get just as sick of your dick as you will with their tired ass boring pussy.
Pump them, dump them, next them.
If you do this, if you never marry, and they invent time machines in the next 30 years, your 57 year old self will fucking come back and thank you for doing it. If you don’t listen to me, then your 57 will come back and say “Listen to me you little idiot, when you meet a blond woman named Suzanne from Long Island, New York, RUN!!!!!”
He has been getting criticisms about being bitter…
I think he said some great red pill info, but he sounds so bitter.
Women can be wonderful creatures, as well as nightmares also, I spent such good moments with them, also non considering sex and romance, I can’t agree with all the things Mark Minter says.
Let’s not forget this, because enjoying women it’s part of a player and should be part of everyone’s life.
Bitter or not, I like his comments because he has been through the trenches. He speaks from experience and for that I think we should at least consider his warnings against marriage.
Mark Minter for President.
tl;dr
Murray Rothbard said it best in 1973:
“The women’s libs claim that men are the masters because they are doing most of the world’s work. But if we look back at the society of the slave South, who indeed did the work? It is always the slaves who do the work, while the masters live in relative idleness off the fruits of their labor. To the extent that husbands work and support the family, while wives enjoy a kept status, who then are the masters?
There is nothing new in this argument, but it is a point that has been forgotten amidst the current furor. It has been noted for years-and especially by Europeans and Asians – that too many American men live in a matriarchy, dominated first by Momism, then by female teachers, and then by their wives. Blondie and Dagwood have long symbolized for sociologists an all-too prevalent American matriarchy, a matriarchy that contrasts to the European scene where the women, though more idle than in the U.S., do not run the home. The henpecked American male has long been the butt of perceptive humor. And, finally, when the male dies, as he usually does, earlier than his spouse, she inherits the entire family assets, with the result that far more than 50% of the wealth of America is owned by women. Income – the index of hard and productive work – is less significant here than ownership of ultimate wealth. Here is another inconvenient fact which the female militants brusquely dismiss as of no consequence. And, finally, if the husband should seek a divorce, he is socked with the laws of alimony, which he is forced to pay and pay to support a female whom he no longer sees, and, if he fails to pay, faces the barbaric penalty of imprisonment – the only instance remaining in our legal structure of imprisonment for nonpayment of “debt.” Except, of course, that this is a “debt” which the man had never voluntarily incurred. Who, then, are the slaves?”
I highly recommend the full article here: http://www.lewrockwell.com/rothbard/rothbard4.html
Amazing post, Doug.
I actually took the time to read the entire article and, as always, Rothbard did not disappoint. His amazing ability to reason and synthesize those thoughts into words (in addition to his economic theories continuously being vindicated) are the reason why reading him never gets old.
Okay, so marriage is an outdated construct. Let’s say I master the game and can fuck all the women I want to. How will I have kids? I think that if I’m this financially independent player badass, I deserve to reproduce just as much as any poor / beta / dumbass husband.
Minter says his Dad’s marriage sucked, but at least there is a Mark Minter. If every guy into game abandons marriage, their genes won’t be spread on and socially trained beta genes will live on forever.
and yes I’m assuming women won’t just have your kid without a ring on their finger.
Some will, but then the child is a bastard.
Stupid assumption.
It’s easy to have a child without a mother in the picture to steal custody. Do in-vitro fertilization with your sperm and an egg donor mother, but with a separate surrogate mother.
That way, neither the surrogate nor the egg donor have parental rights.
Even IVF fees are a lot cheaper than the combination of:
1. alimony post-marriage,
2. community property or “equitable distribution”, handing over 50% of income during the marriage, and
3. excessive child support beyond actual upbringing costs (going toward the mother’s beauty treatments for her new lover, post-separation).
Here’s a
2008 article from a magazine about gay men bypassing women. Ignore the gay part and it still applies.
“Most gay men opt for an IVF procedure using an egg from a donor placed in the body of a different woman, who carries the embryo to term. This is called gestational surrogacy and is favored because in some states it gives the carrier no legal rights to the child she gives birth to.
Melissa Brisman, a New Jersey lawyer who specializes in reproductive law, says it can cost between $60,000 and $150,000 to create a baby through IVF. The parents pay the gestational carrier’s medical bills. The fee paid to the carrier is often around $20,000; for carrying twins it can be $3,000 to $5,000 higher. The egg donor typically gets around $8,000 (although it can be less).”
Mark Minter bringing it strong!
“Being happy is fucking easy. All you have to do to be happy is not be unhappy. I can’t really tell you how to be happy but I can fucking tell you how to be unhappy. Have a 55 year old wife. That’s how.”
Gold, gold, gold.
My grandmother taught me this valuable lesson many years ago. I still wonder how many extra years my grandfather would have lived if she hadn’t been around to nag him. It’s well established that people age faster when they are under constant stress (e.g. people caring for chronic invalids). They can actually measure it now by looking at telomere length. All that constant poisoning of the soul has to wear a man down physically as well. Everyone knows men die 5 years sooner than women, on average. How much of that it due to stress? How much of that stress is inflicted by their wives?
Women say you will die alone if you don’t get married. And they say it like it’s a bad thing.
When I’m a grumpy old man, the last thing I’m going to want is some nagging harpy hanging round disturbing my peace and quiet.
Suppose I retire at 60 and live to be 90. Do I want to spend the last third of my life saying “yes dear” to someone who doesn’t share any of my interests and hobbies?
Who wants to hang out with old women anyway? Do you find them fascinating now? Do you think they are going to get any better over the next couple of decades?
I think the only reason someone should get married is to have children, and even then, not in a western country (France is a maybe for this).
Amen. The first piece should be mandatory reading for 16 years old young men.
I certainly wish I´d come across the wisdom of Mark Minter before I got married.
He just sounds super butthurt
I don’t think young men should go into marriage blind (or possibly at all), but these rants simply aren’t representative of reality. There’s good stuff in there, but it’s really weighed down by the angry-curmudgeon-turned-up-to-11
I agree. Shouldn’t we hear from a couple that has been married for 25+ years and everything is working fine?
“Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.”
Mr. Minter and his defunct marriage is/was unhappy in their unique way.
It doesn’t sound like being but hurt to me. It sounds like the best advice he can give.
Why the hell should I marry some 28 to 35 year old single or divorced used up woman just because other feminists say so… I could think about it if I could stand the person. If you don’t have patience for butt hurt aging women that are annoying or will be totally ugly and fat in a few years, when you have the skills to get better you are getting a bad deal!
You should look at the comments of a blog called MarriedManSexLife.com, it is attempting to be “blue pill” but it’s filled with losers who have a huge challenge getting sex from a 35 to 55 year old woman that they are MARRIED TO! And chances are they are fat and ugly, while still acting stuck up! That blog is actually good for those guys, I was just shocked at how bad these situations can be!
Once you are married its very hard to “opt out” for the man without being financially ruined! Once the ring is on the finger you are changing the balance!
Cheaper and better to just hire a young pro.
Praise Mark Minter, fuck that dumbass Ian Ironwood.
Agree on Ian Ironwood. His blog is so full of shit its amazing. Great and engaging writer. But alot of the stuff he says doesn’t make sense to me and the stuff that does, he has gleaned from somewhere else.
i had read that first comment beforehand. i was impressed at that time. especially the ‘1 IN FUCKING 2’. because its blatantly true.
sure he sounds bitter, but not because the bitch left. he is mad at himself for staying married so long only to have his life taken by someone hes supposed to trust. hes mad he bought into it. and he isnt going to make the same mistake twice.
and he is telling you how not to do it. bitter or not, doesnt change the fact that its good advice.
using game to keep your wife in check is a rationalization for getting married. firstly, why get married at all if you got the game? counter productive isnt it? you could use that game to fuck more than one woman. you could even convince one to mother your children without getting married. if you can game a wife you can game a live in. and if you game her right she wont push the marriage thing.
the reason men say “use game to keep your wife” is because they been sold. they get married to shut the bitch up. and she wont shut up otherwise because they lost control of the relationship. and they rationalize it by saying “im using my game on my wife now”. its stupid. and its self deceit.
“tl;dr”
So nice to know that a half page article is now considered too long for the average American Idiot.
“My ex-wife would be 50 years old right now and I have no idea how I could actually bring myself to fuck her knowing how she probably looks without clothes right now. Women say old men are pervs for wanting to fuck young girls. Fuck I would think it is perverted to fuck old women.”
OMG, that’s some serious funny shit. He should start a blog. Only an older guy robbed of all life’s illusions could write something so true and so ugly.
OTOH, fuck this Minter blue/red/whatever pill. I met a nice girl, if we stay together and things move like they have been, I marry. Fuck all possible consequences and risks. So what if she’ll turn monster some day. I don’t want to eat alone for most days, not raise kids and all other bachelor stuff that can be cool and nice but will make me feel alone most of the time. If that’s beta, fine, I’ll live with it.
If we’d stay on course, I wish my future me would go back in time and tell my 16 yo self not to watch out for women, but tell me I shouldn’t have wasted my 20s with college and worrying about stuff that didn’t matter to my personal happiness. Just go out and party! Drink, sleep around, have fun, try stuff, move around, start a business, push the enveloppe until you fail and try again. Who cares?! Even ultimate players like Jack Nicholson, Kennedy and Brad Pitt got married (a few times) — and they had a lot more to lose than the average guy ever will.
Those stars, they didn’t have more to lose after marriage– they were wealthy; even 1/2 of the money left after their ex-wives divorce-raped them was enough to live like a king.
There is something to be said for marriage. I want to clarify that I would NOT get married in a Feminist state like America unless I was so wealthy I could lose half–twice– and still be wealthy. Minter is right that 1/2 chance of failure is too high when you are going to lose 1/2 of everything if you divorce.
I’m over 50 and never married, even though quite nice women asked me. I’m not hideous, or ugly. I wanted a hotter chick; was the plain truth.
But I suffered many, many times from deep loneliness– I think I forgot what it was like to feel wanted, cared about, they way I did when growing up in my calm, loving, two-parent household.
My father , who was alpha as fuck, on the beach at the invasion of Iwo Jima and manning a machine gun on the ship, said about marriage “It’s wonderful if you find the right woman.” My Mom was his second wife, the first was a bitch.
Of course, the brittle, angry, tough guy American male can’t admit these feelings of needing companionship. He may be in denial of it. He has his fishing rod, his PS3, he’s happy, and fuck you if you don’t believe he’s HAPPY DAMN IT. It sounds as convincing as women who say they’re happy with their cats.
I don’t buy it at all that this guy is happy now. I think he’s still stewing. Does he seriously sound happy to you, with his rabid cursing? Do you think his personality might have contributed to the unhappiness of his marriage? Do you believe he’s detached and content, and just emphatically wanring you?
I believe his insight is limited, but he telling you what he thinks honestly. But he also sounds like he’s still depressed and/or paranoid.
I do NOT plan on getting married in America. But my parents were really pretty happy.
For a lot of people, all those hundreds of evenings alone, cooking for yourself, or sitting in a restaurant alone, where is the simple everyday joy of sharing? Telling someone “The lady in the DMV barked at me and looked like a frog” and then laughing together. Do you really want people to believe you’re some caricature of a Marine, always alone, tough as nails and ready for battle?
Thousands, and thousands of hours, sitting alone. Your friends will be gone. Who will you spend time with ? Your “buds”. You’re still in your 20’s if you believe that “your buds” are going to be around much. True, you may be one of the people who can enjoy spending a lot of time alone. Then you can take a different path and be happy.
Minter’s argument that most of the time marriage shortens a man’s life is simply wrong. Married men live longer and are healthier.
http://www.health.harvard.edu/press_releases/marriage-leads-to-better-health-for-men
It’s simply against nature for most people to be alone all the time. Just like it’s unnatural for a woman to tell a man what to do. No matter how smart you think you are, unless you have one of those naturally solitary personalities, or are rather paranoid and prefer to stay away from potential victimizers, you need to have people around. It’s biology and destiny. It doesn’t matter if you like it, just like it doesn’t matter if you like hypergamy. It’s the law.
I would recommend going somewhere where there isn’t an aberration like American feminism to persecute you for following your natural impulses however.
I think some people here miss the point about using game on your wife. Sure, if you aren’t yet married, then listen to Mark Minter and don’t get married. It is a sucker bet. Take it from me – a “happily” married man for 14 years. The info on gaming your wife is for people who are already married.
For those who find reading a chore: Don’t get married. If you do so despite all evidence to the contrary, then plan on gaming your wife. What follows is for people who would like to know why I wrote the above.
My wife and I have been as happily married for the past 14 years as I could imagine. Everyone says that we have a great marriage. We have two kids, 6 and 3 y.o. I have been the husband that women say they want. I earn >$200k per year in a job that allows me the flexibility to be very involved in raising my kids. I take care of my family financially, emotionally, etc.
Despite (or because) of all this, about 5 months ago my wife uttered the word divorce during an argument (a very rare argument). I had forgotten something that was written on the calendar and she started bitching about it. I asked what she was really upset about because her anger was so out of proportion to my “offense.” I told her my only dissatisfaction with my life is that she seems unhappy. Then she said maybe we should get a divorce. I do not exaggerate when I say that it was like a bomb went off in that it shook my foundation.
I’ve spent a lot of time reading various game blogs the past 5 months. I found them when I googled “how to tell if your wife is cheating.” I am trying to use game to maintain what I thought was a happy marriage. So far it seems to be working. I am making time to exercise more. I am going to upgrade my wardrobe on my upcoming 40th birthday after I’ve reached some fitness goals (and btw for the game-haters – I was far from fat to start with). I have been skillfully using dread game. Why am I doing all of this? My two kids. My parents divorced. It sucks for the kids. Don’t lie to yourself that it doesn’t. And, yes, I do know that those kids are mine.
The bottom line is that if my seemingly perfect marriage almost blew-up, then there is a very good chance that yours will. Mark is right about that. We have everything going for our marriage if you look at the stats: we are both white, highly educated, high income and I met her young (18) so she didn’t have time to ride the carousel. She is the most logical woman I know – her hamster rarely wakes up, let alone gets much of a work out.
We won’t get divorced because I won’t let it happen. I’m not going to be a whipping boy or her slave. I am going to up my value to the point where even if my wife had a turbo powered hamster it would recognize that she can’t do better. Part of that is I am doing more things for me and pulling back form her a little. This is win/win. I get to enjoy more time for myself and she places more value on the things I do for her and the kids (because it can’t be assumed any more). It reinforces the dread game.
Maybe I’m wrong, but you are probably fucked. The kids are getting more independent, you are at peak income, and the culture is pushing her. She might not have been hardened by the carousel, but the carousel music is playing a cute song called “You married too young”. Divorce may very well be logical, and if she just says one word to a divorce vulture, the machinery moves quickly.
I wish you luck, but if I were in your position I’d be securing assets and looking for a job overseas.
The key point in your excellent post is this: when she said divorce you thought a bomb went off. You started to change things, improve yourself. But what has she done thats different? Nothing.
You recognize that divorce is a credible threat that would not go in your favor should she decide to go through with it. So you are doing everything you can to protect yourself and your children. But you see she doesn’t care about that. Thoughts of her children, her flesh and blood that she literally grew inside her for 9 months do not even enter the picture. Such is the solipsism of women.
I have been through it already, and I would not wish it on anyone. And mine was not even that contentious, although it involved children. Start preparing because once the virus is verbalized its hard to cure the infection. How can man live with the sword of Damocles held above his head ? Who is the master and who is the slave?
I could have written your post word for word. My experience exactly.
Smart well said
CALLING MARK MINTER — You are 57? Then you remember 1972 very very well; you were perhaps a junior in high school. That was the year Esther Vilar published the anti-feminist classic “The Manipulated Man.” You have to read, or re-read this book Mark; you’ve lived through it all, and Vilar knew it all and predicted it all. Check out a couple of examples from her ‘Dictionary’:
[Women’s] CODE: Of course I would give up my career if my husband asked me.
DECODED: Once he is earning enough money, I am never going to work again.
CODE: The only thing I want in life is to make him happy.
DECODED: I will do everything in my power to stop him from knowing how much I exploit him.
CODE: In future I shall devote my life to my family.
DECODED: I’m not going to lift another finger for the rest of my life. It’s his turn now.
CODE: I’m so bad at doing things like that.
DECODED: That’s a job he will have to do. What’s he there for, anyway?
There is much, much more. One thing Vilar agrees (in her updated introduction to a 2009 re-issue of the book) has changed is that nowadays, there are many more women working; but she believes that this has not changed their basic nature. I think this is true; but women’s basic nature EXPRESSES itself somewhat differently when they have well-paying jobs — but just as ignobly, as we can all see now.
Anyway Mark I hope you will read Vilar and give some comments on it. I’ve put together a better-formatted and corrected PDF version of the 2009 edition (with its new introduction) than the one floating around — here’s mine:
http://www.2shared.com/document/G5zf-rlF/Esther_Vilar_-_The_Manipulated.html
You need a larger font, Roosh.
What browser are you using? Can you upload a screenshot to imgur.com ?
I dunno. Sounds like this guy had a bad experience, but is it so for all marriage? I nearly married a japanese girl a few years back who was almost like a slave. she cooked (amazing food) and cleaned, and didn’t seem to mind when i “went out with the guys” or flirted with her sister. She said nothing when pictures of me at clubs with girls were posted on facebook. I dumped her in part b/c she was older than me and her biological clock was running out and kids were not what I wanted at the time. However, it was nearly the perfect relationship. I could do pretty much whatever I wanted and be taken care of. Single life has higher highs, but lower lows. When I get busy and stressed out with work, it becomes too hard to maintain my harem. If I can find a version of my ex who is 10-15 years younger, I’d probably go for a long-term relationship as a test for marriage…
This should be Mark Minter’s theme song: I will survive
I agree with the *no marriage* policy.. hence I’m not married.. however, just a question for the experienced brothers out there who have already been through the wars:
What if I want to have kids? What are my options?
My personal answer so far: have kids utilizing an egg donor + gestational surrogate (crazy, yes or no?)
“After she died, he never even had a girlfriend.”
Is that a productive thing to idolize? I’m sure I could avoid having a girlfriend by exclusively dating men — but I really don’t want to have sex with men so…?
To me this doesn’t read as an anti-marriage rant, it reads as an anti-hetero rant.
So by your definition, Roosh has no girlfriend so he’s anti hetero?
Oh teh poor menz. Life is so hard.
This should be spread to every poor bastard engaged friend that we have! Too bad they won’t listen.
Reply to Anonymous
November 3, 2012 at 10:54 pm.
Marriage doesn’t make you healthier,woman don’t marry sick unhealthy men duh,they make poor servants and providers .
The problem with Mark Minter is that while all of his advice is soundly Red Pill, and he knows fully and completely the reality of female nature, he never came to terms with it. He never put himself in accord with the new found knowledge of female nature, and most importantly, never figured out how to subjugate it in order to enrich his life.
He has all the knowledge and wisdom of a Red Pill Master, but no application. He comes off as one of many men who swallowed the Red Pill begrudgingly, because a woman forced it down his throat. But he never mastered the new reality it presented him with, he never became the Neo we must all become.
This is what RPB (Red Pill Bitterness) can do, it will either set you free or ruin you. Often times, when the Red Pill is forced on us, the result is the latter. And that is the real tragedy, because that part is completely up to us.
And now he is getting married, again? Manospphere, wtf?
And today we learn he is getting remarried.
He’s not bitter. He knows what the fuck he’s talking about and all the little white knight cucks criticizing him are simply too young, dumb, and inexperienced to know it. That’s ok. Life is the best teacher. 😈😆