5 Invaluable Red Pill Lessons I’ve Learned

My introduction to the “manosphere” and the various “red pill” principles was probably quite similar to yours.

I was frustrated with the lack of sex and women in my life so I read some “pick-up” books. Then after a bunch of shitty nights out, I finally made some progress.

After that point, I think, we all start to take our own paths. Some men get obsessed with their newfound validation and dive deeper and deeper into the art of seduction. Others give up and revert back to “beta bitch” mode. And some embrace a lifestyle of total self-improvement.

I’ve had many friends and comrades on this path that have filtered into each of these three paths. Personally I got obsessed with the “pick up” culture for a bit, before refocusing and integrating women as just one component of a new self-improvement driven lifestyle.

I don’t mean to preach, but I firmly believe that this is the “middle path” that all men must find for themselves. And it’s far from a narrow, well-defined path. In fact, I think this progression of “over-exposure” to a particular thing before retracting and applying it in moderation is an inevitable part of success.

I did it with women. I did it with fitness, too – developing a borderline eating and body image disorder in the process. And while that’s clearly not a good thing, it supports my theory that I personally need to go all in at something to get a good feel for it before I can integrate into my life in a healthy fashion.

Not to get off topic but I’ve done it with various habits like meditation and career jobs as well. But the lessons that I learned from my immersion into the manosphere are some of the most valuable I’ve ever learned. Here are the top five…

1. Most people are extremely insecure


The majority of men and women crave validation

This is probably the biggest realization I had while going out and trying to get better with women.

On one hand you start to see that the confidence of most women is extremely fragile. Why do they take so many goddamn selfies? To get “likes” that reinforce their longing to look good. And when you’re trying to attract more women into your life this realization alone will bring you success.

When you know that the girl you’re talking to is longing for your validation, despite any bullshit she might be saying, it gives you all the confidence you need to drive the interaction wherever you like.

On the other hand, when you swallow the red pill you’re faced with the brutal truth that your own confidence is also extremely fragile. After all, why are you going out so much and putting so much effort into trying to get laid? Because it brings you validation, of course.

On some level you don’t feel validated or manly if you’re not getting any ass. And it’s not until you’re able to take a step back, recognize this, and stop worrying so much about getting laid or having a girlfriend that this insecurity diminishes.

2. People only change when they want to

This is true for yourself and your friends.

You don’t get better with women until you admit you suck, learn what you need to do to get better, and then go do it. And this takes a lot of time and effort. You have to want it badly. The same goes for changing careers, starting your own business, or building muscle.

It can be very frustrating when your friends are content with their mediocre lives – working a shitty job, getting laid once a year, or remaining overweight – and this can wear down on you. It doesn’t matter how much you try to make them “see the light.” It doesn’t matter how easy it is to build muscle or get laid… They won’t even begin to change until they genuinely want to.

3. Women like sex too


The question is “will it be with you?”

Society grooms us to think that men are the ones that want to have sex. And it conditions us to feel guilty about this and “tiptoe” around the issue when dealing with women. But it’s all bullshit.

It wasn’t until I hooked up with and dated a handful of women until I was able to internalize this belief. But after you’ve hooked up with girls that are legitimate freaks, there’s no denying that women fucking love sex…

Probably more than you do.

Between the popularization of 50 Shades of Grey, the fact women can have multiple orgasims, and our shared desire for validation by the opposite sex – there’s no question that she probably is “that type of girl”.

4. Haters gonna hate

You can’t be friends with everyone. But it’s an undeniable trait of the “nice guy” to try to avoid hurting feelings, and then doing everything he can to make things right or convince other people to like him when he does.

Since I’ve branched out from the norm, publically published a lot of material on my views, and started to live my own life, I’ve had to deal with a lot of criticism and bullshit. Whether it’s from an uninitiated friend who questions my morals, angry commenters below this article, bad reviews on my books, or a butthurt blogger—“haters gonna hate.”

It’s part of life. People aren’t going to agree with you. People aren’t going to like you. It may be based on a fundamental difference in their beliefs, or it might be because of an underlying insecurity of theirs that you’re bringing to the surface. Or they might just be jealous.

Whatever the reason, you got to be comfortable living with the hate and not trying to make everyone your friend. Sacrificing your principles to appease others will only create incongruencies in your character – and make you seem weak to everyone else.

5. There’s no “right” way to live


There’s no proper way to build relationships or careers

When it comes to dating, you have guys who swear that you MUST NOT enter a LTR until you’re X years old in order to have a successful life…

When it comes to career, you have guys who swear that you MUST quit the corporate world in order to live a fulfilling life…

When it comes to fitness, you have guys who swear that you MUST get as big as you can in order to be a real man…

It’s all bullshit.

I’ve done the LTR. I’ve also done the dating many women at once. I’ve done the 9-5 job. I’ve also done the location-independent lifestyle. I’ve bulked up to near my genetic potential. I’ve also gotten in “fighter” lean shape.

There’s no right answer. You can be happy and successful doing any of them. Do whatever the fuck you feel like doing. Don’t follow some “guru” approach just because. Try out different things and see what works best for you.

Read More: What I Learned From A Weekend Of Forgetting The Red Pill

144 thoughts on “5 Invaluable Red Pill Lessons I’ve Learned”

  1. “Why do they take so many goddamn selfies? To get “likes” that reinforce their longing to look good.”
    Facebook “likes” are a G-rated version of bukkake. Each “like” is a cum-shot in the mouth of validation for a woman swarmed with admiring (and beta) men all too eager to oblige. An imperfect metaphor perhaps, but you get the idea.

    1. Social proof and status are EXTREMELY IMPORTANT to women. It’s the equivalent of the board room political power game for men. Suzi getting 100 likes reinforces her social position over Tracey, who only gets 65. Increased number of people in Suzi’s orbit (including betas, suitors, friends etc.) gives her tremendous social power; she can leverage this to dictate where her social circle hangs out, who they hang out with, who gets let into the social circle; she can also ‘transfer’ off unsuitable suitors to her lower value friends and she gets currency from being in the match making position to do it.

    2. I just quit Facebook altogether half a year ago, never looked back. It’s like dragging yourself out of the gutter, feels so good.

  2. Reminder that red pill should not be limited only to women and sex issues, because this gives equalists too much ideological footing in other aspects of life.
    Apply the red pill to all things, until the word “red pill” is once again reabsorbed into the public consciousness as just truth.

    1. This is true, ” red pill” isn’t just picking up women like some people think, it’s seeing the unvarnished truth in how the world is.

    2. I didn’t really understand the red pill till I read Gustav Le Bon’s 1895 book, The Crowd, and worked out for myself how it applies to the modern world. http://whyarethingsthisway.com/2014/03/22/why-are-the-pediatricians-so-confused-about-the-actual-state-of-the-scientific-literature/
      In fact, I was delusional about many fundamental aspects of the world, just as almost everybody is, trapped in a crowd think matrix and propaganda.
      In the real world, the true realization when you digest the red pill is very nearly as overwhelming as in the movie.

  3. If the term “red pill” isn’t cringe-worthy enough, we now have “manosphere. ” Jesus Christ people, just live your lives. Any man who worries so much about what labels he can apply to himself is obviously more interested in living his life to suit others than he is about making his own choices. That’s not very many at all.

      1. Okay I did, and they were confused because they had never heard of a red pill outside of the Matrix. Having a cause is admirable. But constantly inventing words and terms is what liberals do. Look at words like heteronormative and cisprivilege. It’s embarrassing. Manosphere sounds like a gay pride club. Let’s not stoop to their level.

        1. I think I disagree. You need SOME labels so you can talk and get across your point. We should keep our nomenclature tight and lean and of few words. Unlike the liberal weirdos like “cis gendered , bi curious , other kin” or similar madness. I wanna hear Rush Limbaugh or a big time news presenter use “red pill” “the matrix” “the manosphere” . We want the word out

        2. And making trains run on time is what Nazis do. What does this have to do with anything? Language should be clear, direct, and precise. It is a tool for communicating ideas. What ideas do you have to offer, other than “you guys should discuss your ideas differently”?

    1. would you preserve ‘paleoconservative’ or ‘neoreactionary’?
      Red pill is easier to remember, and it makes it completely clear where you stand.

  4. This is not directly related.
    Do you guys ever get frustrated when you feel obligated to go to a social function? I promised a good buddy of mine I’d head downtown to go see his concert, and its not that I don’t want to go out and support him, but I’d much rather stay home tonight and focus on work and projects.
    I’m not anti-social, but I honestly just don’t give a fuck anymore to go to bars and spend stupid amounts of money to get wasted. I enjoy meeting new people and catching up with friends, but the expressed sentiment of the night is “lets go get so fucked up”.
    Can any of you relate to getting to a point in your mid-late 20s where you’d rather save your energy for your own ambitions than go out specifically to get drunk? Or am I just being snobby?

    1. I am right there with you. Maybe I am selfish and like socializing only on my terms, but going out to bars or clubs seems like such a waste of time to me.

    2. I was fortunate enough to have a grandfather who was a veteran of world war two, a pillar of masculinity, and it was to him that I posed this exact same question when I noticed a similar feeling that you have.
      According to him, what you’re feeling is manhood. The original Red Pill. There comes a time when a man realizes that his time, his energy, and his resources are not infinite, and that his actions have consequences. In hard times, that point can come early, while in our soft, woman-dominated times that point comes later and later. Eventually, he comes to find he gains more joy from completing his own tasks than by amusing others. The only downside (if it can be called that) is that your friends who have not hit that point will likely be left behind.
      No one said the Red Pill would be easy, or that you would like what you’ve learned.

      1. “No one said the Red Pill would be easy, or that you would like what you’ve learned.”
        You got that right.

      2. My great grandfather was in WWI. He was a linesman. He climbed telegraph poles while Germans shot at him.
        My grandfather was merchant marine.
        My great uncle was a tanker who was shot out of 5 vehicles.
        I don’t tell these tales to piss on other men; I say this to honour men that we don’t have any more. Where have they gone, brothers?

        1. Though the saying has been used many times, those men were forged in the fires of war. War is a funny thing, though it brings horror and death, though it scars a generation, those scars become a common bond shared by all who have them, a unifying force that unites a people in a way no speech, no education, no politician can.
          But they are gone, because we have had peace for so long. It takes a total war, something that mobilizes us as a nation. The American war for Independence did that. The American Civil War did that. The two world wars united a generation on a global scale that hasn’t been matched since. But the first world war started over 100 years ago now, and the centennial of the second is fast approaching.
          We are losing those men of shared scars due to time, and sadly, it will take another war on that scale to unite us once again. To give us all a set of scars we can share.

    3. I can relate. One thing I have learned over time is to carefully tune in to what your body is telling you. It’s a crucial part of recognising the key transition points in your life AS THEY HAPPEN and not being stuck doing things long past their used-by-date in terms of relevancy to your life.
      I did post-graduate studies in my late 20s; I lived in an apartment complex of approximately 250 students ages ranging 18 to 37. Good times, but I no longer went out carousing 3 nights a week. It’s hard to explain, but something INTERNALLY had changed, a feeling, the key was I recognised it. I was thinking and planning 2-2.5 years down the track and my mind was on that. I just didn’t feel the need anymore to go out, drink and chase ass. My idea of a good time then was 10-12 people sitting in the lobby of the apartment complex with drinks and some music playing in the background.
      My hormones were no longer driving me in quite the way before. A lot of the younger people I knew couldn’t relate and didn’t understand, but they were still under the grip of their hormones.

      1. That does describe where I’m at.
        I’d much rather discuss politics or learn something than play video games and smoke weed. I used to do things more for a sense of belongingness and now I hardly care what other people think. Everyone is on their own trip, whether to their own benefit or not.
        And it’s true I need to be at least partially inspired by a woman now to be interested in her. A woman has to have some femininity, or class, or intellect, or bubbliness, or just fucking something…
        Fucking trash-bin bitches doesn’t cut it anymore like it did when I was 22. Don’t get the wrong idea I have not exclusively dated “trash-bin bitches” lol.

        1. Yeah this is another sign.
          I’ve been called outright rude and arrogant for refusing to talk to girls on their level.
          Thing is, unless she’s especially clever, classy, or lacking in western ego, then I don’t give a fuck and have literally zero interest in their lives. I’m far too intelligent to talk to the average girl about what interests them. Is that arrogance? Yes! Do I give a fuck? No!
          I don’t want to patronise by offering advice, but it sounds like I’m about a decade older than you and I went through exactly the same feelings.
          Ultimately my only advice is clichéd in the extreme – do NOT give a fuck what the driftwood that passes for many many people think of you, or what they say, or anything they do. In 10 years you’ll be kicking life’s ass while they’re queuing up to kiss yours

        2. It happens. When you start looking at women that way, no longer automatically thinking how “speshul” they are, looking beyond the outer exterior, the facade, becoming more discerning, you have changed. I do not think I am Don Juan, but I am no longer at the point where I go ga-ga over visuals. It gets tiresome when they try to play the ‘you should be dribbling over me Im so hawt’ game. Then they realise they’re aren’t getting the expected response. you are unflinching and don’t care one way or the other….so they try again. It’s like when a DVD isn’t playing properly, so they slam the DVD player again, assuming it will work second time around. Then it doesn’t, so they get worried and panic. Its beautiful for you when it comes off; they get scared because of the unfamiliar power dynamic, they are not used to it.

    4. Clark,
      I am in the same boat: Reno/ Vegas trips, Bachelor Parties,& the like are just not my speed. How do I coldly break it too my buddies. Its easy for outsiders telling you to say “Fuck them”, however, your boys that have helped through thick and think. Tough situation.

      1. I am in the same boat about parties Vegas trips bachelor parties etc. I just let all my friends know that this party thing isn’t me anymore and dont go. Also begrudgingly I cut those sort of “party” friends out of my life, well not completely but socially for sure. It is a tough situation indeed but in the end they all know that I am there for them when they need a friend.

        1. Yeah. It’s the three bachelor parties, three weddings with gifts and three times listening to the sob break-up stories.

      2. Take ’em hunting. Tell them that killing things and drinking beer and hanging out in the great outdoors is your new speed.

      3. I took the other poster’s advice. I went and I left early.
        Noteworthy though is that a gaggle of troops followed me out after I said my goodnights.
        Seems I was not the only one who didn’t actually care to be there.
        I went because it was my buddy of 10 years playing in a tribute band and he’s been telling me about it for over a month.
        For a party to catch my interest I’d have to know that the music will be awesome, or the girls will be attractive, or it can help my career in some way to meet some people.
        Going to a bar just to drink is a waste of time when I’m excited about what I’m going to be up to tomorrow.

    5. I think you are just getting older and wiser. I as well, started to realize that “getting fucked up” just left me feeling empty and unfulfilled in my late 20’s. Now in my mid 30’s I find no joy in hitting the bar/club/pick up joint getting drunk and hitting on less than average women that think their shit dont stink. Being hungover is the most unproductive guilt ridden thing I can do to my self. I believe we may be in the same city (T Dot) so this city already gives me less incentive to spend money on a night out. There is no value in it. No ROI. If I go out now its also to catch up have a few pops and a few laughs and now Im never disappointed when I do head out with this attitude. Also when I do feel like going out to pick up I find I have a better time by myself, I pick a pub a concert some gala or show hang out at the bar drink at my own pace and now Im sort of forced to meet new people and hit on women in a less “aggressive” environment. I found that I dont need validation as I know im a good man and that there are far more important things than getting fucked up and getting laid. I now focus on my self, self improvement etc. and live a life that makes me happy.

      1. Right on man.
        Yeah I’m in TDot and I agree with the ROI mentality. I know guys that are financially and psychologically unstable because they spend so much money trying to impress women and do what they think they are supposed to be doing in this city.
        I’m not talking about omega losers, I’m talking about cool dudes that are actually fucking themselves over career-wise because they need the constant validation of women.
        And yeah I also prefer meeting women on my own. I have practically zero-clown game so I prefer starting conversations with women during the day. I’m more sly and silly than I am loud and colourful. I find it more relaxed when me and a girl can actually hear each other speak, the club scene is too much for me unless I know the party will be good.
        Another Torontonian on ROK… I literally know about 5 guys on here from TDot now. Coincidence? NaIdunthinxo.

        1. I know, what is it about Toronto guys…I find them all pathetic and they are more the problem then the women…”hey look at me everybody I work in an office building on bay street and my company just gave me platinum seats to an ACC event and I wear a suite to work…I’m important, love me…remember in Seinfeld when that land lord starts burning Jerry because of his fur coat and calls him a fancy boy….basically that’s what i think every time i see clueless Toronto males! But on the flip side its actually better for guys like us in the long run. Girls get tired of dealing with these wimpy fake phony males so in reality it makes it much easier to pick up when a woman is looking for a man! Ya I know the day time pick up has become a large part of my game lately. Works well…the night scene in Toronto is dead. I hope the red pill will makes its way to Toronto one day..we have the potential to be a great city. And also its no surprise that there are about only 5 Torontonians on ROK out of a city of about what 3 million(?)..SJW capitol of the world!

        2. One way you know this is happening? You start noticing / caring how loud venues are just like your parents would.
          I meet a rotating group of friends at a coffee shop on Saturdays. It’s fun, always one or 2 new people there each week. But last week I was so frustrated at the loud ambiance, echoey walls, and shitty music that was being played to the point it was difficult to hear conversation unless you were sitting right next to the person. It has concrete floors, big brick walls, an open kitchen area, and nothing to mute the sound. So we are moving next week. I also really enjoy a good tapas bar for light food and conversation, but only go there early because it gets too noisy and I’m mainly there to talk and listen to others.

        3. When I think of a Toronto male I think of a skinny fat hipster that lives in perma-debt in the Annex sleeping with feminist-5s that cannot even pretend to imagine having his children.
          The problem in that area is that the guys have to force themselves into mediocrity for fear that their feminist pussy-dealers will cut him off for growing a spine.
          And for every one of those guys is 20 other betas who follow them around praying for the day that this girl will dump the guy and magically land on their flaccid penis.
          Yes… I have contempt for Toronto males…

    6. Tom Leykis always said “do whatever you want to, but also don’t do whatever you don’t want to do”. Meaning if your friend, wife, girlfriend, etc invites you to an event that you really don’t want to go to, then don’t go. It’s as simple as that. Don’t go to places that you don’t feel like going to because others want you there. Go to places because you want to be there. If you’d rather stay home, just stay home. You’ll be much happier doing what you want to do.

    7. Hi, I can relate and I’ll relay : My favourite romanian music band ,,Subcarpati” came to the town I currently live in for a concert. The band sings about our folcloric heritage and history ( extreme romanian red pillers ) in hip-hop beats and sounds. So here I was between choosing to stay at home and read, or to go to this club and support the guys > I went, I payed, I applauded, me and leader noded in salut, I expressed my encouragements non-verbally. And I went home. There were people younger and older than me around, smoking weed and acting like a bunch a fucking meaningless animals – but hey that’s clubbing for ya’.
      Anyway, I had to accept those motherfuckers’ presents in my proximity for only 2 hours in order for me to express gratitute to one of my favourite bands because I knew that oportunities to see them again in my town wouldn’t be – price has been payed.
      It’s better to stay at home and eat, sleep, recover rest, read, work out, work on yourself, your game, your strategies in your life etc etc etc. fuck clubbing.
      I feel ya’ bro’.
      Develop your style with ease.

    8. I can totally relate to that, the painful realization that you’ve grown out of your social circle, out-matured them, so to speak.

    9. Yes I can.
      Thing is, there will always be people who think you’re a snob/pussy/whatever for leaving that particular game.
      But these people’s lives are empty or outright train wrecks and they can’t stomach seeing people do anything constructive with their existences.
      If you already realise this in your mid 20s you’re doing ok. I also was about 25 or 26 when I cut my group of friends ruthlessly

    10. Nope i’m the same, was going out like crazy last year but now I honestly can’t bothered. I’m not anti-social as I have lots friends an do things but I’d rather stay home an do something I enjoy or not go out so I can get up early next morning to go to the gym or go for a walk on a trail. Getting fucked up for no reason, waking up with a hangover an spending a massive amount of money just doesn’t apeal to me anymore. I can understand if your running night game on girls but even that doesn’t seem worth it to me now days.

    11. I usually try and get out of most social events that involve driving more than about 15 minutes.

    12. I do this all the time. Really I have no compunction saying “no” to something if I don’t want to go. I just remind myself of the consequences…if it’s important to a close friend or family member that I be there, will I feel better about going? Will I feel worse (“guilty”) if I don’t? Whatever I’m willing to put up with after the fact helps guide the decision.

    13. I moved to the bar scene area of my town out of coincidence last year. I can literally crawl down my driveway and across the street and I’d be at the front door of my favorite old pub. If I walk down the street, I’d pass at least 10 bars/clubs/lounges, even more if I continued the walk. Needless to say, I’ve probably gone out to bars for drinks maybe 5 times in the past 15 months I’ve been there. It’s just not for me anymore, there are better things to do even if that means doing nothing. Just last week I went to order some food at a local peruvian joint that is right next to a pub. I went outside to wait for my order to be cooked, I started looking in to the bar from the sidewalk. From the outside looking in, it looked like a rubber room full of retards. There were 2 guys at the bar that were full on wasted; laughing with their mouths wide open, one guy wrapping his arm around the others shoulder, spitting on each others faces as they ‘talked’ to each other. At the corner of the bar were maybe 4-5 guys all huddled around the 2 girls that were having drinks, basically trying to impress them with whatever bullshit they were spewing. The hammered bros playing darts and giving high fives. I was happy I wasn’t apart of that bullshit anymore. Drunk and stupid is no way to go through life.

    14. Let me guess, you’ve partied last year and the years before and now you’re all grown up? I think you’ve done too much drinking and want to experience more things, wine and cheese parties in your case. Chances are that you’re bored of the same ol same.

    15. I had a similar experience last Friday. Got home after softball practice and this chick I’ve been talking to asked me to meet up with her at a restaurant that turned into a “club” after 10pm. Mind you, I was a bit beat after a 10 hour shift at the office and it had been a very long time since I played softball so i was feeling the affects of it. I entertained the idea for a bit but then quickly thought about the clown article Roosh wrote a while back. Although I do want to score with this chick, her thought was solely on me entertaining her (and probably in front of her friends too); she wanted to show me off like a shiny new toy.
      I shot back a text telling her I was not up for it, of course, she gave me the sad face and told me I would have to make it up to her (bitch, please). I didn’t even bother responding back. I went to sleep like a baby that night. Point is, my time (whatever i choose to do with it) is much more important than anything or anyone. Getting my rest for the next day was much more important than entertaining some chick and her friends.

    16. I go to bars maybe once a month, so the friends who are into that lifestyle have just stopped calling me and inviting me. I also always “give up” alcohol for lent (I barely drink it anyway) but this is a more socially acceptable excuse to avoid bars.
      I would rather do just about anything than go to a bar, so if someone suggests it, I either politely turn it down, or suggest an alternative venue.
      I did recently have to turn down a former close friend’s wedding invitation. I simply could not bring myself to be part of this charade. The guy is late 30s and marrying his 3rd wife. I suppose I should suck it up and be happy for him, but I did that the last 2 times and they ended up being huge expensive mistakes.

      1. I had the same situation with a friend. His second wife, wanted to do the whole bullshit charade again of stags, parties, showers etc. Told him I gave you all the money you need with your first wife and you’re not getting anymore from so do everybody a favor and get married at city hall. Also I told him hes an adult and makes enough money where I dont need to support his mistakes in life.

        1. Do you mean you paid you friends first wedding?!?!?! o_O
          A co-worker of mine was married for 4 times, and has 11 kids.
          He only works to pay alimony.

        2. No no, I mean the money I gave him during the stags, showers, jack and jill etc. plus the wedding gift of cash. I helped pay for the first wedding as did everybody else who chipped in that way. So for his second wedding i was not giving him a cent. Back in the day when people needed help when getting married the community would help I get that. But now its just a cash grab, a way for greedy people to profit off their friends. I find it disgusting and that opened my eyes to the scam. All other friends who get married who do not need the financial help just get a minimal contribution from me now.
          Poor guy, 4 marriages wow… marriage just ruins a mans life. Should have learned from his first mistake though

        3. I know what you mean.
          Sometimes you think you only got invited to someones wedding to bring the gifts and the cash.
          He did learn of it. He got a vasectomy, and divorced right after that.
          Thank god I didn’t put any children on this sick world.

      2. fyi I got those citizenship papers together, you gave me the kick in the ass I needed. Will be going to the consulate this week to see if they are good enough for what they wanted.

      3. You should be giving him your condolences instead. Looks like he never learned from his mistakes. Going for number 3? Geez.

    17. Can 100% relate to this and I’m now known as the guy who appears without notice, has a good time, catches up and then disappears again till the next time, whenever that may be. Nobody demands anything and I don’t demand anything from anybody. You do need to stay in the loop however in terms of whats going on around town/socially because you will never be asked/pressured to do anything, the initiative is all yours.

    18. I am a former lawyer so I guess I respect such social functions.
      Sorry brother but this bullshit will persist well into your 40s.
      However, don’t get drunk. I do not always follow my own advice.
      If you want women and if you want to do business you cannot get drunk.

    19. are you sure that concert wasn’t a leafs game clark? those are brutal!
      btw, had a social-function back in february that i had my suspicions was going to be awful and boy oh boy… it was awful. i decided afterwards that i was done with any and all functions that didn’t directly contribute to MY personal happiness/satisfaction.

    1. Yeah, I have to question the article’s contention that the corporate lifestyle can be “good” for anyone. If you want to do it short term, make some bank, save up a ton of money, fine, but that is a soul sucking life path. Working in the confines of a cubicle or dreary office in a large, soulless concrete building, surrounded by “office space” or “Matrix” types, not to mention dealing with the corporate PC lifestyle and language restrictions, and the feminist HR department, is no place for a man to spend his time.

  5. ” After all, why are you going out so much and putting so much effort into trying to get laid? Because it brings you validation, of course.”
    this is the only thing I’d disagree with. We want sex due to a biological drive for it, first and foremost. If we’re not getting, yes, it can be a downer and make us question our self worth (primarily our ability to meet our biologically based desires). OTOH, women need validation as a biological driver.

  6. The selfies… Oh dear God, the selfies!
    Men don’t take selfies. Unless you’re in front of a monument and there are no strangers around to hand your phone to, don’t take any selfies! Save this sad, pathetic, laughable and desperate act for young women who think a bazillion Likes and thirst-based Comments from Beta Schmucktown are a validation for a rather weak and miserable existence that only nosedives off of a cliff once 40 hits!

    1. “Unless you’re in front of a monument and there are no strangers around to hand your phone to . . .”
      I don’t coupon hunt monument photos either. I’ve been there, done that, strictly for the personal experience. You can take my word for the north face of the Eiger in winter, or not. Makes no never mind to me, so I don’t have a photo filed away to prove it.
      I really just don’t understand trophy photos.
      I did mark the Jungfrau with vomit though. Anyone who wants to can DNA test the glacier I suppose.

      1. Well my brother took a selfie in front of statue of Churchill in London. He was there for work, didn’t exactly go across the pond just to take that photo for Instagram, or “trophy hunt” (shall I say “You’re one ugly motherfucker!”, “What The Hell are you?” and “WHAAAAT THEEEE HELLLLLLLLL ARRRRE YOUUUU?” as well?) as you aptly put it. It turned out a decent selfie for once ever, better than decked out in spandex in the gym with a bunch of idiotic impromptu hashtags to try and legitimize how “hard” you work out (since January).

      2. “I really just don’t understand trophy photos.”
        ditto. but people do it for social status. i thought it stopped in your 20s, but no, people keep up this shit all their life.
        you’re not an INTJ by any chance?

        1. I’ve never felt inclined to take the test, so I haven’t a clue. Having a look at the type descriptions I would be a fair fit for any of the analysts, although a bit weak in the “strong leader” department, and not too bad for the explorers either.
          Maybe it depends on the day of the week and the phase of the moon.

        1. The Eiger and Jungfrau? Switzerland, although I’ve “done” the Garmisch-Partenkirchen/Innsbruck Olympic ski run tour. That was back in the day when American dollar bills were, literally, worth their weight in gold when out of the country and Europe was just about getting out from under the war.
          My family would do a month in Europe because we couldn’t afford a weekend in Disneyland.

        2. Oh, shame on me, I guess. I’m a native Bavarian but I don’t know shit about the Alps and where all the mountaintops are… for me it’s just a place I need to drive through to get to Italy 😉
          My grandfather was a lot into serious hiking, though, he loved Austria.
          Where are you in the US? I’ve been to a lot of your National Parks, I really loved Grand Tetons, it was majestic and also Glacier and Yosemite, of course.

  7. Some men get obsessed with their newfound validation and dive deeper and deeper into the art of seduction.

    Yeah, this can be a problem and unhealthy, too. I guess it can be good for one’s mental health if you’re feeling insecure and need an ego boost, but, honestly, after you’ve convinced yourself that you are capable with having sex with women and being able to satisfy them, it really becomes shallow and depraved.
    I know this sounds cheesy, but what most guys really want is to (romantically) love a woman and be (romantically) loved in return. If you can find a good, level-headed girl, who respects you and your masculinity and doesn’t fashion it into a weapon to be used against you, I think this is the ultimate, and, yes, within the context of self-improvement I agree, would be a good way to look at it to keep a level head about it.
    Problem is, these days, so many women (AND MEN!) put up mental barriers to prevent this from happening because love is scary, and the stakes are raised 100-fold from the typical pedestrian dating/fucking. I know I’m guilty. If I’m really honest with myself, though, this is what I ultimately want. Sex is so much better when you love a woman. It just sucks when you find out you’re getting used.

        1. They are Kindle DRM protected files.
          And come on…they must cost $15 for the pair on Kindle.
          Drop Rollo Tomassi a line and ask him for free copies yourself.

  8. “3. Women like sex too”
    But not nearly to the extent that men want sex. Esther Vilar from Manipulated Man writes: “A woman will certainly feel happy when she has an orgasm – but it is not the most intense pleasure she knows. A cocktail party, or buying a new pair of aubergine-colored patent-leather boots, rates far higher.”
    And therein lies the difference. For any man who wants sex regardless of looks or wealth he has to put in the work. For any woman who wants sex, she need only be remotely nice and she will easily and quickly get an eager and willing cock.
    Use common sense here: How many attractive or semi attractive women do you know who send out for a male prostitute? Vilar says that the media over states the female sex maniac. I find this to be true, especially for anyone who has read (back in the day) any of the “stories” in Penthouse forums and likewise in Playboy. These are examples of complete works of fiction, and today’s media continues to feed us the same bullshit.
    Overall though, this is a good article.

    1. Agree. It’s contextual, time and situation dependent. At that time of the month, at the yearly music festival, with studly stud mcstud muffin in his tight singlet and muscles protruding eyeing her up from the bar, yeah, she’ll be extremely sexual. or with the star football player out on the town, yeah, same thing. but there is no way someone with 17 times less testosterone than a man will have the same constant ongoing sex drive day in day out.

      1. ” with studly stud mcstud muffin in his tight singlet and muscles protruding eyeing her up from the bar, yeah, she’ll be extremely sexual. ”
        I have seen many fit good looking and confident guys crash and burn only to see the chicks they went after reject them for the sickly, sunken eye meth addict who had a gram of coke and was willing to share it with her. And I’m talking young and hot chicks, not goth chicks or haggis ugle crack whores. Whereas men get off by popping a load of cum from their balls in / on a chick, women get off on psychological highs: drugs, alcohol, money, social media validation and shopping. The trick is to find out what a particular female wants. Hint: it’s not a cock, nor a man.

    2. Women don’t like sex as much as men because they can get it whenever they want. And I know a lot of you idiots think there are 5s and 9s but really a 5 is a woman without make up and sexy clothing on a 9 is a woman with make up and sexy clothing on. A fatty is a permanent 4 and below

      1. Hehe, depending on circumstances, the binary approach of either “would bang” or “would not bang” is far more efficient (in terms of rating bangability). The 1-10 scale really does only come into play if you’re looking for more out of a relationship and you’re quite right that makeup/dress adds or subtracts some points in terms of physical appearance.

      2. You’re right, and it’s amazing what they can do with makeup. Google ‘makeup transformations’ and it’s astounding what comes up.

  9. Everyone wants validation. Channeling it positively is what matters. Going out there and being something versus taking a selfie

  10. I suffer from nice guy syndrome and just discovered this site. I’ve been rejected by so many girls. I’ve got no game. I’m a 28 yo Indian guy and can’t seem to score even on dating websites with Indian girls. I need some motivation and much help much greatly.

      1. Thanks RHA, I appreciate the support. However, I read too much and act too little. I’ll take your advice and get off the website, but how else can I get women?

        1. Be proactive with the books I recommended. Particularly with Models. It is a life improvement book disguised as a how to get women.
          You can get women the old fashion way, meet them in person. Outside of that, you are net loss. You’re current level of neediness needs to be overcome. Your best bet is to embrace rejection and talk to women you like 3x a day. Do it immediately and make sure you LEARN from each encounter. If it was successful why was it successful. If it failed why did it fail. With all this, read the books recommended. It will boost your learning curve immensely.

        2. Yeah, my current plan is not doing anything for me apart from causing me major depression, so I think yes I should at least try to increase my wisdom, so I’ll read the book (of course not following blindly). However, the second part of getting rejected by women makes me feel physically sick (that’s why like the on line stuff). How can I boost my confidence without being drunk? or at least minimise my anxiety without drinking ? I need wing man to teach me this shit.

        3. You’ve got it all backwards. You NEED someone to get you out of this. Nothing will happen until YOU do something. And the first thing you must do is be happy alone. You don’t need anybody, woman or wing man or whatever. You only need YOU.

        4. You’re afraid to move forward because you know you lack something and you lack something because you are afraid to move forward. A real bind. If you can find someone to listen while you go through the process that may be helpful. Still move forward, and accept your fear is keeping your results as they are. Hand holding is what got you to be so fearful in this arena. Trade secret, all men know fear well. Those who gain much success feel the fear and move towards what they want regardless.

        5. Yeah, this is good guest, I appreciate this dude. Ok, so basically I got to be fucking Tony Montana about this shit and approach Elvira and forget about Lopez.

        6. That resolves much of the immediate dependency on outcomes and outcome independence is the major component to facing the unknown. There is so much information now on women that it is hard not to be able to get laid within a year’s time with effort and focus on yourself. The only problem now is with information at our fingertips, the layman looks to delay when he resolves his problem because he can find a solution quickly.

        7. In one of my hardest times of my life, I did exactly the opposite… Cut everyone out of my life.. I did a lot of introspection, sat there on a chair hours at a time and think. Nobody can help you even if they want to. It’s all a very personal journey. Very difficult decisions must be made, and each decision will alter a good chunk of my life and therefore I have to make them alone. It’s how it is. If one doesn’t do these things (from one of my previous experiences), one will get involved with the wrong woman make another string of mistakes and be back to where he started. Yes, I did that.. But not this time..

        8. Many focus on the woman. It’s much better to focus on your ability to get the woman. The ability to make money, the ability to get out from a tough bind. The ability is what matters, not the result… Once you know you can do all these things, only then you are free.

        9. RHA, Thanks dude. FEAR = False Evidence Appearing Real. Assume a Null Hypothesis and go into the event to learn the truth. I need to forget if I get laughed at or rejected in the worst possible way (I once got throttled by a girl on the dance floor!!)

        10. I once was told by a 20 year old woman, “I’m too good for you.” I was 15 at the time. I later saw said woman working as a sales associate at Macy’s. So too good for a minor but not too good for minimum wage. Go figure. When you look back, rejection makes for some entertaining stories!

        11. I know that feeling. I’m currently assessing myself and what I wish to do as a career, what ways to improve my goals with women, what ways to improve my quality of life, and equally must say, no one can help you. Maybe another more successful man, but at the end of the day you must decide all your own. Dated a fairly successful woman who attempted to help but her advice was towards the wrong person. Internally the decision was made not to accept her advice and this was the correct move as her advice was built for her life, not mine.

        12. First and foremost is improve yourself and gain confidence and self esteem. Once you do that, you could give 2 fucks what anybody else thinks about you. Get your validation from other men of high self esteem, not from women.

        13. JH you’re right dude. It’s just women are so fucking lovely as soon as I see a 10, I’m like fuck everything else. How the fuck can I play it cool? I mean the coolest mo fo I would like to emulate is Robert Downey Jr, a relatively average guy who is charming to the point women cream their panties at the sight of him.

        14. You’re under the testosterone spell, almost like under hypnosis. The best way is to see right through that disguise and picture her as a blood sucking parasite that she is. That helps break that spell.

        15. Yeah, sort of like the loaded cannon theory made popular in the film there’s something about Mary. Fucking hell dude, it’s great to talk, that’s a fucking brilliant idea…..Unload the canon before battle, it’s so counter-intuitive, I need to be completely drained.

        16. Yes. When you see a hottie, train yourself to see a parasite until she proves she’s not. If she asks you for a favor, it’s a shit test and she’s trying to use you (taking your time). Think parasite. The hotter she is, the bigger the parasite.
          This may sound unfair to judge them like that especially if you don’t even know her, but women have been taught to think all men just want her for sex automatically. So it’s all fair.

        17. Cheers JH good wisdom, I appreciate it. I don’t know about the parasite aspect because I think at times women are the sweetest creatures on earth (some times) but I think what I’ve learnt is that I can never be lulled into a false sense of security. However, recognise the moments when she is genuinely lovely and enjoy it.

        18. Acting sweet and lovely is the bait to lure you in so you would put that ring on her finger in holy matrimony. After that, she shows her true colors. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

        19. Thanks dude, I appreciate the support but I think because I don’t have that much experience with women I probably going to have to learn the hard way so it’s tangible and sticks in my mind.

  11. The best source of information is from a 40+ male who’s lived it, not someone in the process of discovering something or trying to do sideways personal promotions.
    Sorry, but this “Cosmo” list shit and ego stroking isn’t interesting.

  12. numbers 2 and 5 really resonate. I’ve seen some guys from high school lately, one of them is an alky and two of them have kids that they never see with slutty ass women. It doesn’t matter what you tell these guys sometimes, there is no saving them. Fuck ’em.

  13. Perhaps this is heretical but I do not embrace the Red Pill ideology. I think that men should be men and women should be women. Let us see how this plays out:

  14. The moral of the story is that your life will never make sense until you realize that jews must disappear.

  15. Many fair points here. Certainly re-looking at only the headings, these points should be agreed by all. The comments section also seems particularly high quality, This seems like a good place for my question,
    In an interest of eliminating this behavior in all people …

    11 Signs You’re Being A Wuss

    and agreeing with the initial premise of red-pillism of self improvement and being better makes for a better life, and removing all forms of oppressive b-s, but not agreeing with the haters;
    What would be an example of a red-pill acceptable woman?
    I’m aware of the stay at home and make babies option, but please remember that is not an option for all, and its quite clear some women are not very good wives and may have uses elsewhere.
    Is there a variety of woman who may assist you in achieving your equality in exchange for theirs? A version where we all self-improve and live our own lives, where everyone finds their appropriate place in society and it works better?
    Also, can a woman take the pill and game men, would this be fun for a man or an abhorrence, I haven’t sussed that out yet?
    This is genuinely not sarcastic, no feminist ploy, not troll baiting, no wussy ‘cant we all get along’, What with the big dose of testosterone Ive had being on here, I’m actually rather primed to agree there are different types of people, different levels of ability and skills, and some people are not destined to be winners, you have to improve to keep your relative position and we cant all be equal, some parts of life require hierarchies where people need to follow and not question, and in others we should be flocking as one. But all emergent group behaviors have some seriously dark downsides we ought to be vigilant of, knowing the actual plan and finding an agreeable place in it is key.
    If I get some real hate-free answers, I will not only respect them, but do my part to see it done by setting a better example to young people of all varieties in order to remove the stupidity.

  16. You take the blue pill, the story ends. You wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill, you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes.
    The term “Red pile” term come from this quote right? So…when you take the red pile, your journey it’s much about exploring how deep the rabbit hole goes and yes, it is absolutely not limited to picking up women.
    Great post.

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