How “Being Nice” Creates Serious Problems For Men

As I’ve watched the US and European nations destroy themselves through idiotic policies, I’ve often wondered how we got into this predicament. After much thought, I am convinced that most of our ills are attributable the drive to be “nice.” Here are some examples of how niceness is destroying us.

Being nice poisons our relations with women

Being a nice guy is the kiss of death if you want to get and keep a woman. This may sound odd because every woman, when asked, says that she wants a nice guy. In truth, women despise nice guys. What they really want is a strong man—a man who will lead them. But it is impossible to lead while always being nice.

Niceness is what leads men to beta orbit women on social media and in real life. The manosphere has been out here for years but I still see men posting comments like, “You look really beautiful,” to mediocre-looking women on Instagram. What do these men gain from commenting on an attention-whoring photo? What do you think the chances are that the woman who posts these pics will choose to date one of the 50 thirsty men who commented on her photo?

Being nice is even more of a liability in marriage and long-term relationships. It may be nice to ignore your mission to please your spouse, but it will repel her over the long haul. This is because niceness is inherently beta and women do not want beta males. I know two cases of men who had their wives cheat on them. In each case, there was nothing that the man did wrong. Neither man cheated on his wife, gambled away the family fortune, or developed a heroin addiction. They were both outstanding providers and fathers.

Their only fault was they were too nice. Their marriages could’ve have been saved if they had been more willing to unapologetically take the lead in the relationship.

Niceness in religion

Christian teaching has been deeply affected by the “will to niceness.” I recently read a discussion on Twitter between three theology students, one male and two females, at the Dallas Theological Seminary. DTS was once a conservative Evangelical seminary. Now it seems it has succumbed to therapy culture. The discussion consisted of the man challenging feminist talking points, but then conceding the argument to the women because he was told that he ultimately “could never understand being a woman.”

Sacrificing truth at the altar of niceness is not just something done by Protestants. In the past 50 years the Catholic Church has also de-emphasized its more difficult moral doctrines in the hope that it would become more welcoming. It has gotten so bad that some are teaching that having nice manners necessitates that the Church drop certain moral teachings altogether.

Of course, niceness in religion has the exact opposite of its intended effect. Rather than removing impediments to faith, it waters down that faith to the point where it is so insipid that there is no reason to even bother.

Being nice is destroying the West

After the Barcelona terror attack

Pretty much everything that ails Western countries is the result of someone’s stupid attempt to be nice to one group or another. Girl power was built on the premise that girls might feel bad about themselves and that is why they chose not to go into disciplines that are dominated by men. Gay marriage is the law of the land because we bought into idea that the homosexual men were sad that they could not enter into lifetime monogamous commitments.

When a few Social Justice Warriors complain about Confederate statues (most blacks don’t seem to care), conservatives quickly agree to take them down because they value being popular more than sticking to their principles. Europe and the US’s immigration policy is similarly driven by niceness. These nations are willing to sacrifice the lives of their citizens rather that make people who live in Islamic countries feel bad.

In reality, it is not possible to govern a country without offending someone. Trying to do so can only lead to foolish decisions.

Being good is not the same as being nice

One of the most common misconceptions of being nice is that it is the same as being good. This misconception even affects many otherwise red-pilled men. The truth is that being nice is often the exact opposite of being good.

The reason for this is that the compulsion to be nice springs from an inordinate desire to be popular and loved. The conservatives at National Review capitulate on every major cultural issue because they want to remain members of progressive society. Christian leaders who water down doctrine do it because they have a greater desire for the acclaim of the crowd than they do the salvation of souls. And beta orbiters on social media prefer to get a “like” from an internet thot to improving themselves.

By contrast, being good means you will sometimes have to assume unpopular positions. This is especially true on modern society where good and evil have been completed inverted. If you share the same political opinions your grandfather held, you will be branded as a fire breathing racist. You may lose your job because of it. If you want to restore the patriarchy, you will be shunned as a troglodyte.

Although there is a cost to being good, it is important to remember that history is never made by “nice” men, but by those who dare to hold lofty ideals even when it goes against popular opinion.


We must wage a holy war against “being nice.” But this holy war is not targeted at any external enemy but at the “nice guy” who lives inside each of us. You must oppose him every time he wants to beta orbit a girl online or in real life. Slay him when he urges you to put your woman before your mission. Crush him if he suggests that you should tone down your political or moral views to avoid offending others. At all times choose to do what is right and good, not what is nice.

This is a battle that lasts a lifetime. We were all programmed to be nice guys. Getting over that programming is not easy, but the rewards are worth it: you’ll will experience true freedom when you end the tyranny of nice.

Read More: US Government Goes Full Retard And Backs War Draft For Women

236 thoughts on “How “Being Nice” Creates Serious Problems For Men”

  1. Being helpful and useful seem to be ingrained in men. It served a purpose in our ancestral past, but now that women have a helpful and useful daddy government to take care of them, allowing them to pursue tingles, it’s become quite an ineffective sexual/life strategy for men. The only problem is that filtering your natural niceness will lead to conflict. Either you will dislike yourself for wearing a mask or dislike the women who like you when you’re a jerk even though it’s not your natural state. The best outcome is to internalize being not nice after years of training, similar to how a fighter can punch out of instinct, even though he wasn’t born to do it.

    1. Depending on various factors such as your personality, social status, and what principles you stand for, being “nice” is not inherently wrong as long as you have principles and aren’t an over-agreeable doormat. You can generally get along with people, be charismatic, and wish the best for society, while succeeding at life and getting plenty of tail.
      However, you have to know when and how to handle conflict. If you feel like someone’s trying to push you around, you need to step your foot down, plain and simple. Women in particuar always need to know where your boundaries are, and they need to know that you’ll defend them. Generally speaking, there’s obviously various ways and degrees of handling conflict, ranging from being firm about your position to going to war with your opponent(s).
      The quote “Be polite, be professional, but have a plan to kill everybody you meet” comes to mind here.

      1. Yes. I lean towards a more optimal mixed position. Switch from beta niceness to alpha aggressiveness, sometimes periodically, sometimes daily. (The daily storm(er) in an hourglass.

    2. The concept of “mansplaining” made it a whole lot easier for nice guys to check out. No one wants to be put “on blast” because they tried to be helpful. The more little terms they come up with like that, the fewer nice guys they’ll find. They might think they don’t like nice guys, but they miss them when they have to walk home, buy their own drinks and dinners, and do their own handyMAN work. I’ve seen instances of this and thought “Well, that’s the breaks.”

    3. Niceness should be used as a strategy with women. Nothing more. Men just need to know how to balance it. Ever wonder why women stay with abusive men? Its because they are nice in flashes. And the woman always says “When we first met he seemed nice”. It all has to do with intermittent reward. Someone will sit at a slot machine all day long putting money in and more money in, winning nothing. Then they win a little something and that motivates them to keep feeding the machine in hopes, however far fetched, that they will win again, this time even bigger.
      Contrast that to a vending machine which gives a virtually guaranteed reward when you put your money in. No one ever gets addicted to vending machines.
      Its the same principle in niceness related to women. Constant, virtually guaranteed niceness isn’t the way to go. Dole out your niceness like a slot machine not a vending machine.

      1. For instance, when girls have sent me pics in the past, despite them truly looking beautiful in the picture, I’d say: “You look happy in that picture.”
        It’s nice, but not directly complimenting. It leaves the door open for their respect of you, and leadership in relations going forward.
        I leave the “you look good” for the rare occasion when they get done-up really well.

      2. I don’t know, a lot of the fat cows at my job seem to be pretty addicted to the vending machines here. In fact they become quite inconsolable when those aren’t functioning properly.

    4. No kidding – try explaining something to someone clueless and you’re more likely to get a “mainsplaining” smart alec response than a thank you.

    5. “or dislike the women who like you when you’re a jerk”
      Exactly. That’s ultimately why I married a traditional foreign girl. After I redpilled and started becoming more successful with women, I became even more disgusted by most of them for liking the person that I was pretending to be.

      1. Good friend of mine married a Bulgarian girl. He was totally nice and she ate it up and they fell in love and got married… 10 years so far all’s well. It wasn’t until abut 3-5 years into it when he had to be a dick now and then to keep her in check.
        With some foreign girls, it’s almost a reverse strategy.

    6. As you say, it’s all conditioning. I can be apathetic to others’ plight by and large and reserve my kindness, consideration and general decency for those who deserve it.

      1. I’ve had to recondition myself post red-pill to bring back my manners into the equation. I went so far into the DGAF column I lost some of my polished side.

        1. It happens to the best of us. I’Ve also been prone to that. It’s a skill like anything else-you hone it and know who is deserving and when.

    7. Science and technology made by men made women sit with all that and say men are useless. Part of R&D is being turned into a part of the niceness equation. Science and technology in part is making the physical prowess of a man look useless as well. When a crane can lift a truck what use is man’s strength is one example women see. That’s why the days of strongmen are falling behind and gyms are turning into ballet studios and women safe zones. Science and tech is a masculine endeavor yet it’s not awarded towards it’s makers when everyone uses it.

      1. When smart phone tech got notably better, I had many posts on here and RVF before ROK existed about men creating the very tech that made us irrelevant. I’d call smart phones “amplifiers of human nature,” and “personal validators.” In fact, the “personal validator” term opened a girl that I banged one night.

  2. Don’t be afraid to call people out on their shit either. Just 2 days ago some dumb bitch (hot and with 2 friends) cuts me up on a car park and missed me by about 2 feet.
    “Are you a idiot? I don’t care about your car but mine’s actually worth something” … I say matter of factly once we all approach the shop on foot a few seconds later.
    The shock on her face and meek, hesitant apology were priceless.
    For too long, people (women in particular) get a pass on their stupidity. It’s not fucking good and it’s not acceptable!

        1. Reminds me of time a girl pulled out and hit her. Her fault of course. When cop got there and was trying to get both stories I was going for # and the beta fuck cop separated us just as the convo got fresh. He then reduced her traffic offense to basically nothing.. just like a beta would do.

      1. r/nothingeverhappens
        By the way, most people who visit this site have never even heard of reddit. They have lives unlike you and me.

    1. I worked as a waiter once and was the only man who waited tables for a while where I worked. The games women played: shirking duties, stealing tables, etc. I was Jekyll and Hyde. I could be the ‘nice’ helpful guy, but I could also be a real dickhead. Somethings I’d let something slide once or twice to get a feel for someone’s character. Some things – like stealing my tables (especially if it was a regular customer who tipped well) – I would not let go. Let’s just say some of the patrons could hear me curse out some of my female co-workers in the kitchen worse than Gordon Ramsey. No one messes with my money. Period.

  3. “Nice guys finish last.” – Leo Durocher
    “Pound that pussy and call her a cab.” – Vinny Pringo
    “Treat her like shit and she’ll love you forever.” – Gandhi

      1. “Fuck her in the ass, wipe your dick off on her drapes, and get her sister’s phone number.” – Hugh Hefner

        1. ‘Drill her backside, her sister’s, her best friend’s, wipe your dick on her father’s face and then put your saddle on her and ride her home’-Vinny Pringo.

        2. I fucked her, her sister, Hugh Hefner’s mother, Vinny Pringo’s mom and sister, and Winston Churchill’s wife. At once. Then, they all paid for my uber because fuck cabs and the Indians driving them – Gandhi

        3. I’m sitting here in the Oceam Club Lounge, surrounded by little Asian snot rags unfortunately, laughing out loud. You guys rock

      1. I noticed the more of a douche I am in when I approach the better my chances of success with a woman.

        1. I know that I heard that saying when I was younger, but I never really understood it, or connected it to dating. I saw it more as nice guys getting walked all over at work, or being push-overs in social environments, but for some reason I never connected it to romantic or sexual pursuits.

        2. he managed the ny giants and dodgers back in the golden era of baseball, so either he was implying his players were all pansies, or the yankees were chock full of the biggest dicks on the planet

        3. Reflecting back on my adolescence, it’s evident which dudes father’s were teaching and leading them appropriately. Between religion and my lacking father, I was beta with an alpha core hidden waiting to break free. I was too afraid and lacked confidence

        4. I hear you. My explanation for that is simple: we were brought up with a set of values and attitudes (politeness, respect for authority, being civic-minded, etc) that were probably fine for a more civilized time (say, the fifties or even the sixties), but which are actually detrimental for you right now.
          Adapt or suffer dearly. There is no other way.

    1. From the movie “The Rock”
      Stanley Goodspeed: I’ll do my best.
      John Mason: Your “best”! Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen.

    2. I thought the mighty Vinny Pringo (Peace. pussy, power and prestige upon his golden, glorious, name) said ‘Pound that pussy and have her call a cab’-she’s got to earn it after all; no room for being nice.

        1. He is the Church. As far as reading materials we will have to consult with other members to obtain the Codex Pringus Vinnius,

    3. You can get away with being nice if you have a real muscular presence. Remember 80% of how we communicate is through body language! Most western heterosexual men have weak feminine (gay) body language!
      I prefer to be respectful (semi nice) where if you cross that line with me, you will know about it with me in your face!

  4. “One of the most common misconceptions of being nice is that it is the same as being good. This misconception even affects many otherwise red-pilled men. The truth is that being nice is often the exact opposite of being good.”
    I agree, largely. I recall that I read an article by the political scientist Thomas Pangle – specialized on Aristotle’s The Politics – for a couple of years ago, and he stressed that the truly good man/citizen is always kind of a dissident. To have values and character is not what those above wish for. They want docile people who always say yes.

  5. because they value being popular more than sticking to their principles So virtue signalling is ensuring that niceness is seen by third parties.. Just as in the South Park episode “Safe Space”, a character called “Reality” turned up and crashed the party, there will be a nasty shock one day for all these attempts to deny the realities of the world such as a return to fascism in some form.

  6. It’s helpful to look at the origin of the word “nice” (from
    1250-1300; Middle English: foolish, stupid < Old French: silly, simple < Latin nescius ignorant, incapable, equivalent to ne- negative prefix + sci- (stem of scīre to know; see science ) + -us adj. suffix
    When women call you a “nice guy”, they are subconsciously using the original meaning, i.e. someone who is foolish, stupid, and ignorant.

  7. I had a girlfriend who used to hate the expression “he is a nice guy…”. She would say that meant he was lame or a creeper. She would roll her eyes anytime she heard another woman describe a man as nice. And she was right.
    If you ever hear anyone describe you, as a man, as being nice then you need to do a better job of defining your personality. It is better to be described as a good guy then a nice guy. Nice guy means you bend over and take it from whoever comes around next. Good guy means you help out people when they need it but don’t take shit for doing it. But it is probably best to be described as an asshole because that means you say what needs to be said at times when it must be said.

    1. One time my cousin was describing me to some chics.
      “No, he’s not nice; charming, but definitely not nice”
      In the past several years Ive been labelled a “know-it-all dickhead” separately by several people, who consequently were all a bunch of moronic weaklings.

  8. Since you brought up Christianity. Christ was pretty clear in noting that being nice wasn’t gonna cut it– that if you held to His teachings you weren’t gonna be popular. He pissed off those in power, the Jewish clergy, vice being nice.
    Matthew: 5: 11-12
    “Blessed are you when they insult you and persecute you and utter every kind of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward will be great in heaven. Thus they persecuted the prophets who were before you.”
    Mathew 10: 34-
    “Do not think that I have come to bring peace upon the earth. I have come to bring not peace but the sword. For I have come to set a man ‘against his father, a daughter against her mother,
    and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law; and one’s enemies will be those of his household.’ ”
    Being liked doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll be respected. Act like a doormat, and you’ll get walked on. Nobody respects a doormat.
    Always liked this quote:
    “It is a general rule of human nature that people despise those who treat them well, and look up to those who make no concessions.” ― Thucydides

    1. The thing about Christianity and the modern interpretation of it is that Jesus was definitely not a nice man. He was actually sort of a bad ass given the day and age. Driving the money changers out of the Temple is the modern day equivalent of driving the Democrats out of the House with a whip of all things.

    2. Even though I’m not Christian I do know clearly what Christianity is about and I get annoyed when I hear people saying shit like “God loves you no matter what.” or “Hate the sin not the sinner!”
      I mean why are these homosexuals making up what God and Jesus says and does? God and Jesus is not your servant, that’s the message I want to get across these fools and they do not adhere to your comments.

    3. Jesus wasn’t nice to the Jews levying taxes. He rather made a public mockery of them, a sure turning point that led to his crucifixion. Humiliation and torment has its place and purpose.

  9. Any suggestions of how to teach this to my 13 year old boy? He is being raised by his single mom in Tornonto. Thanks!

    1. Do everything in your power to prevent that!
      My evil witch of a mother did everything in her power to ensure I would become a bullied victim (by bullying and victimizing me) when I started school.
      My Ultra-alpha father let it happen because he did not give a damn — and they were married!
      It is a fathers most important job to train his son to become a real man. More important than anything else, including his career. Do whatever it takes to train your son. Please. Don’t let him end up like me.

      1. Well, I am far from ultra-alpha but I am fairly masculine. I try to tell him things I wish somebody WOULD HAVE told me when I was his age. Can you list 3 concrete things to do, 3 concrete actions that are specific? I try to tell him women are highly emotional and probably should not even vote, that homosexuality is a mental illness, that society has gone crazy and that if he truly wants to be counter-cultural become Catholic like me, get married young and have a bunch of children.

        1. Yes, I can give 3 suggestions.
          1) Ensure that he is good with his hands. Both in a fight and with fixing things (cars, carpentry, etc..). Nothing wrong with outsourcing this training if you are too busy or not knowledgeable in these areas.
          2) Monitor his progress. This does not mean being one of those idiotic helicopter parents, but it does mean you take notice of his actions. Is he on sports teams (doesn’t have to be the star player, but on some teams is important)? Does he hang out with a good group of guys? When a teen (by 14 or 15) does he have a pretty girlfriend who truly seems to value his company? Or does he just mope around the house, staying in his room and watching TV. If something is wrong in his life, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! Most boys will not ask for help.
          If being bullied in school, they will either be too embarrassed to say anything and think that “taking it like a man” is the right thing to do.
          3) Impart your knowledge on him. Especially when he is in his late teens early 20s. Teach him about running a business, buying and selling real estate, being a landlord, how to meet quality females, how to invest wisely, etc.. If you are your son’s life mentor, he will succeed in life and eventually surpass you, the way Alexander and Charlemagne surpassed their fathers. It should be every father’s greatest dream to see his son surpass him.
          My father did absolutely none of the things above. Except telling me to get a BSCS degree. Which at least gave a career that earns well. So he gets to look down from the afterlife (if there is one) to watch his son blow his cash on expensive whores and rot his intestines out on cheap booze. I wonder if he is happy?

    2. Just make sure you’re in his life as much as possible and that you encourage him to participate in masculine activities. Probably too late to keep him away from smartphones, but try to get him out in nature.

    3. At 13, the best thing you can do is get him to start spending less time around his mom. Sign him up for martial arts, he’s at the perfect age.
      That will get him developing a work ethic, that effects the thought process, I’m not sure if you’ve noticed, lazy people are poor thinkers.
      Once his brain is active he’ll be more apt to be open to your ideas, and influence, then you can lead by example.
      Just my 2¢ .

    4. Depends on which stage he is in. If you do any outdoor activities, get him into any of it. Don’t drop the bomb too suddenly, got to ease him into it. At 13 though his hormones are raging high so he might adhere to the “getting pussy by being the nice guy” very easily. See how he interacts with girls as well and assess the situation. If he doesn’t try and act like a pet he’s got a chance, if he simps around then you got to give him a talk in any outdoors activities. Also understand where he sets his morals of what is good and evil quickly or if he even has a good and evil moral compass to begin with if he doesn’t have one… even better.
      Also never look like a pussy or back down when you’re with your son against anyone you interact with around him. Don’t be a nice guy around women either. Sons act according to example.

    5. Right now, your son thinks that either his mom (and the females she talks to) is crazy, or that he is crazy.
      Remind him, every day, that he is not the one who is crazy. Tell him he’s not. He is experiencing and witnessing things that make him feel insane (if he says it or not), and he is compromising his judgement in an effort to keep the peace under her roof. Multiply that x10 if your ex has a very close relationship with her own mother. Make him trust his own instincts and his judgement, even if he has to keep his true feelings to himself. Preventing him from developing his own masculine instincts is the single mom MO.

        1. Thanks for saying so. The most important thing we can tell boys under the primary influence of women is that they are not crazy.

        1. I don’t think so. Maybe there was a ban hammer spree to keep ROK from going the way of “The Daily Stormer” (eradicated from the internet). If so I’m surprised bob smith is still kicking around…

        2. I am so glad I just happened to see this. It felt like my favorite bar was running out of my regular drinking buddies and I didn’t know why. I can’t believe so many of the people that .Ade the comments fun have been banned

  10. This idea that a man can never comment on a woman’s photo without wanting to sleep with her is pure nonsense. I’ve commented on a picture of a female friend on Facebook, the following comment: “Beauty itself” I wrote, because she is a beautiful girl. I do not fancy her. I do not want to go out with her. I do not want to sleep with her. Nevertheless, she is a really lovely girl and I’m allowed to point it out. There is nothing wrong with that. It’s just an honest reaction to a nice photo of a nice girl who I like. I genuinely have no other designs on her.

    1. There is something wrong with it, in that inflates her no doubt already overinflated opinion of herself.
      Though I don’t expect you to understand why, given the fact that you have a FB account in the first place.

      1. No, because I am not handsome. But she is genuinely a nice person and I like her. I am not interested in being in a relationship with her, nor do I want anything from her. That relationship between men and women is actually possible, you know.

        1. Now a days that is little hindrance to getting a little on the side. I don’t do it because I don’t want to, not worth my time, but those that do say that married women are the easiest to have a first night lay, with engaged being a close second.

        2. Dude she’s 30, she’s engaged to some guy, she lives in a different country than you. She’s not going to sleep with you, honestly.

  11. They call it the “hard right” versus the “easy wrong” for a reason – many times it’s hard to take the right road versus the wrong one.

  12. Boys don’t connect with girls who have no shame, and girls don’t connect with boys who have plenty of it. Each needs to partly see their own nature in the other, to form a complimentary team.

  13. I can attest to this. Take that good manly, loving, helping do good for the world energy and refocus it on helping yourself and your family. Western women have plenty of help from their new sugar daddy, big government.
    Feminists will screw you over, they hate men, I repeat, do not help these bitches. They are like a poisonous viper, you can help them, and they will still bite you out of instinct. It’s all they know, hating men.

    1. I actually encountered a guy who was foolish enough to help an outspoken feminist (loud-mouthed(even for a feminazi), blue-haired, womyn’s studies major). She was trying to lug a large box across campus and this guy asked if she needed help, which she handed over the box and thanked him.I immediately expressed my “shock and dismay” at her not only failing to recognize his patronizing her by implying she was incapable of handling the load herself, but that she had acquiesced to his “obvious condescension” by allowing him to take the load and thanking him for the privilege of “calling her out as inferior”. She immediately turned on the guy, cussing him out and snatched back the obviously too large burden and struggled to lug it herself, leaving the poor bastard scratching his head about what he had done “wrong”.
      This event vastly brightened my day as the entertainment value of turning these morons against themselves and their self-interests, is the only value they will ever achieve.

  14. I think we are talking about a matter of degrees here. It’s okay to be “nice” to the high quality people you love or value highly, and most importantly truly have respect and love for you. I don’t really like the word “nice.” I prefer words like “kind,” ‘loving,” “respectful” etc. “Nice” has a wimpy quality.
    Call it what you will – “nice” or whatever – but treating people “nicely” for lack of a better word, should be reserved for people in your life who TRULY deserve it – people who have earned it. Don’t waste it on the random individual who should be treated with generic civility.
    Not all, but many women will, for the most part use and abuse a “nice” man – use him up and throw him out like yesterdays newspaper.

    1. “I think we are talking about a matter of degrees here. It’s okay to be
      “nice” to the high quality people you love or value highly”
      Agree 100%. In fact, the Christian paradigm of “turn the other cheek” can ONLY be applied as you have described. Turn the other cheek on a savage and you will get a knife in your back while turning. Kindness, forgiveness and mercy can only be applied to those who have earned it.
      BTW, say hello to “Uncle Arthur” for me…

    1. I agree with you, but violence should be abandoned in the future. A real man can make a decent woman feel secure enough that she never needs to be scolded. If she can trust him, she will follow/obey him. Unless she’s a worthless, spoiled, bored, horny bimbo (in which case, why bother even boning a chlamydia cunt?). A woman worthy enough to attract you should never fall into your violence meter.

  15. the strange thing though is that while this is probably true of both men and women, I would say women are more inclined to confuse what is nice for what is good (iris murdoch being the exception). I would say this relates to two things, firstly the fact that female judgement prioritises feeling / sensation (i.e. how did he make me feel as opposed to, objectively do his actions accord with some objective standard of the good [said no chick in the history of the world ….except iris murdoch) and secondly because they tend to have difficulty distinguishing social from (absolute/abstract) moral judgements (unless they are contrarian in nature).
    The irony then is that men being nice towards them doesn’t really satisfy either of those two quasi moral standards – niceness gets you very little in the way of social cache (whereas badness may or may not..being feared certainly may) and of course it doesn’t make them feel nice either. From the male point of view someone who tries to be good, may perhaps come across not as good but as nice (for instance such a man may seek to be respectful and ‘do right’ by a woman).
    Well that’s the red pill, but it doesn’t augur well for the future of humanity

    1. I have Bruno’s Web and a few other novels on my kindle. What is it about Iris Murdoch and her novels? Should I drop Tolstoy and be in a rush to read her novels?

      1. no, not really. I’ve only read one of her works from cover to cover, and I can’t remember the title off hand although it was about a philosopher in Bath. She did write a novel call the nice and the good, and spent a lot of time thinking about moral philosophy in her academic career. She wrote a famous treatise called the Sovereignty of the Good. Ethics wise it’s not what you would call regular chick lit

    2. This! Excellent analysis. I’ve always thought women often conflate niceness and goodness. Glad others can identify this as well. I think with these two being conflated, it causes significant problems as far as interaction between men and women is concerned. Perhaps a guy isn’t a beta wuss, but a woman perceives him to be that way because he was being good.

      1. thanks. I’m glad others can perceive it the same way. Sometimes being nice may be just weakness, but a lot of the time its more principled than that. Of course it can be both too, but I’m not sure women – in particular – can often distinguish the one from the other

      1. I mean the superficial niceness that we all project in daily life. When you don’t where your next meal is coming from you stop giving a shit what anything thinks.

        1. “When you don’t know where your next meal is coming from…”
          Next meal. Next slug of booze. Next piece of p*ssy.
          Lot’s of things things make you stop giving a sh*t.
          I suppose my use of asterisks mean some small part of me still gives a shit.

  16. Every time I see a guy holding a “I need feminism because…..” placard, I just want to scream. How about you hold up a placard stating, “Lost, my balls, if found please return to…….”.

      1. Yeah. Was listening to an old Tom Leykis show yesterday. A guy said exactly that. Act like you care, feed into their insecurities and tell them that other guy was not worthy of their time or attention.

    1. “Lost, my balls, if found please crush them on the curb…TWICE. Thank you.”..
      There fixed it.
      Feminist men should just go and get them cut off, the useless cucks. Gods mean spirited joke on man. Never let it be said that God wasn’t serious about making man pay for listening to Eve. People ignore that part of course, and man continues to this day to keep making that same mistake. God made woman to remind man what the price is for failing to BE a Man in all senses Mind spirit and body, as he intended. Eve was God’s shit test, he hasn’t stopped laughing since then.

      1. It’s all a metaphor. The apple (ripe, cherry red, delicious) is Eve’s cooch and the snake is Adam’s member. I like the shit test analogy you give.

        1. Actually no, the apple is not her cooch. the “apple” was always knowledge of the Gods and when ingested gave the consumer that knowledge. And, the snake was never Adams appendage, it was always Eve self indulgence as it ONLY spoke to Eve, and CUCKED Adam by getting Eve to take of the fruit that she then gave to Adam. Eve of course motivated even before consuming the fruit by the self indulgence being manipulated by the snake, Eve already was self indulgent or else she wouldn’t have been interested in the forbidden fruit. Adam was oblivious to the fruit, to start with.

    1. I hope you used your Christian Bale throat cancer Batman voice. This typically drives the point even more.

    2. I always though Bats was more neutral good. He does operate outside the law.
      Oops, the nerdy roots are showing.

  17. Nah, it’s all BS. No such thing. Females are hypergameous. They are attracted to status in the form of financial wealth, social popularity, and outrageous good looks. If a guy is lacking in all 3 of those departments, the female will say hes “too nice”. A guy that is severely lacking in all 3 of those departments is more than likely going to always find themselves on the beggars side of things, which in turn has them develop a “i gotta be nice and friendly” attitude with everyone so I can survive.
    Take any guy that has been rejected by every female for being “too nice”, put a few million dollars in his pocket, and all the sudden females will love him because…..”he’s such a nice guy!!”.

    1. She may let him bang her (most likely wearing the bag), but she will NEVER love him. She’ll bang the rich “nice guy” for his money, but she’ll love the a-hole coke dealer who beats her and treats her like dog doo-doo.

      1. Holy crap, the first 20 seconds makes you want o punch him out to put him out of his misery..He rehearsed this video, I can tell, and he still can’t get his own script right. Crippled by lack of MALE role model with XY genes…Watch his interview and you see a man who has no clue about raising a MALE child. Dude is clueless and so detached…well damn, you ignore your kid and this is what you get..clueless dad, dangerous kids…

    2. Yeah but they won’t respect him. They will want the lifestyle. But he will be beta bux while others are alpha fux

  18. Definitely agree with you about being nice . Now we have the Fukin hate Police at our door for calling a Homosexual ahem a Homosexual. Not a Poofter not a Fudgepacker not a Shirtlifter call them this and the Kunts want you Hung Drawn and Quartered. O for the day when if one of these Reprobates approached you,
    you Just Booted them right in The Balls . Now that’s really being nice.

  19. There’ nothing wrong with being nice, but there is something wrong with being taken advantage of.
    Know the difference, and you’ll be alright.

  20. “The reason for this is that the compulsion to be nice springs from an inordinate desire to be popular and loved.” << voila

  21. Being nice stems from a desire to kiss someone else’s ass or at the least not hurt their feelings. Being an asshole doesn’t help either but being firm and determined in the face of opposition makes you a man. Harry Truman was that kind of guy, he was unpopular during his Presidency but he managed two terms and history redeemed the man, he’s always listed among the greats. He was one of the most decisive men to ever lead the United States.

  22. Some of this does seem peculiar to clueless and mentally diseased western women. The whole fascination with neck tattooed violent criminals thing hasn’t hit the traditional parts of east asia yet. Though I do think being a pushover is frowned upon by humans everywhere, men and women.

  23. Always love a good piece against “niceness” which can be a counterfeit form of charity or agape. Probably in the deluded minds of some women they think their innate disposition to be “nice” is Christian love, much like how “I feel” has replaced “I think” in common discourse, probably due to the dominant social influence of women.

  24. That “nice guy” inside. Yeah, that one. I needed a sacrifice at the gates of hell, so the simp got tossed in. I don’t miss him. Life has been so much better since then, with that useless phucker being gone.

  25. Gods mean spirited joke on man. Never let it be said that God wasn’t serious about making man pay for listening to Eve. People ignore that part of course, and man continues to this day to keep making that same mistake. God made woman to remind man what the price is for failing to BE a Man in all senses Mind spirit and body, as he intended. Eve was God’s shit test, he hasn’t stopped laughing since then. REAL men learned that lesson, and you can see it in how they live right now. The rest of Men simply have not. You know what makes my skin crawl? The fact I didn’t learn that lesson until half my life was over.

  26. You should also keep Nice People very far, far away from anything you value and hold dear. You might not win a popularity contest for being nice all the time, but people will know exactly where they stand with you, you don’t have to be nice, just polite. Above it all never show anger the surest way to discredit yourself in any situation.

  27. Every Mr. Nice is really a submissive woman inside, the wretched product of an unmanly (or absent) father and an uncorrected mother. This kind of man uses female ways to retrieve the command of his lost manhood. What typically emerges, of course, is a more submissive woman in a man’s body. How can he become a real man using sly, seductive methods, surrendering in order to take charge? Will he not either strengthen his wife’s role of powerful tyrant or, at best, become that power, become a tyrant himself?
    Mr. Nice is never wrong in his own eyes. If he lets you be the boss, it’s only because he is a born loser anyway. Too gutless to win respect by asserting himself, he gives in to you to get support for his failing and to convert failing into virtue. When things go wrong, he gets another ego boost by sitting on his perch, puffed up with pride, smiling in delirious judgment.
    A woman deeply desires to respect her husband—so much so, that the frustration of living with a sweet but characterless animal can bring out the witch in her and drive her to drink and to other men. Unfortunately, most women are drawn to weak men—to a Mr. Meek and Mild, the Friendly Fiend.
    Good, in its purest sense, is what every woman, like it or not, needs. Fairness and firmness are the only authorities to guile. By patiently jousting with her spirit, the husband possessed of such authority can rescue his wife from the agony of pride. But agreeable Mr. Nice, by virtue of his guileful support (a sort of false love), serves instead only to frustrate and corrupt her.

      1. the twitter feed header from the twitter feed I was reading tittle “Just fuck her you homo”…Was Glorious..

        1. He can’t, he has to wait on all the male and trannie teens in the local school to go first…He is an embarrassment to the Y chromosome.

    1. the main purpose of getting married is to raise a family together. If a woman does not want to have children, then then that relationship should end immediately. why get married to a woman that does not want kids??

      1. Yeah, this is the thing that you sort out prior to even asking her to get married.
        WTF. If she said yes then, and no now- divorce.

    2. omg this guy has been crucified on Social Media.. Gone intergalactic viral everywhere. Just look at his pussy face. Haunting.. Was reading a twitter feed and even the women were repulsed by this [email protected]

    3. Visual ipecac…disgusting the level of simping this is. As a White male, I am highly offended. The Cuck should have jumped from a high building, imagine the prize that his wife must be.

  28. Saying what you mean in my book is the best thing, even if what you say is not nice, at least you are being honest with the other person. Its the best way I determine who to trust. Being diplomatic and saying what other people want to hear may make you more friends, but you really don’t want friends who cannot handle truth.

  29. “The truth about women is that you can do almost anything to them…except bore them” -Reiner, The Counselor
    “It is our faintness of heart that has driven us to the edge of ruin” -Malkina, The Counselor

  30. “Pathologic Altruism” is the term and there’s been legit science and articles about this and how’s destroying everything…

  31. So… serious question here (I’m new here): How exactly do I become less nice? Or even know if I’ve been too nice?
    Because no I’m not going to become some douche-bag who starts fights to prove he’s tough or seek endless one-night stands with women. On the other-hand I’m not some meek beta-orbiter who’s afraid to disagree/argue with a women (or anyone for that matter), nor does my girlfriend take control of life/activities.
    My GF calls me nice, yet she is clearly satisfied with me and vice-versa (including in bed :P) Does that mean I have a problem according to the OP? Not offended, just curious about your views.

  32. As a Black man the whole issue about the Confederate Statues isn’t racial but a matter of historical censorship. The radical Liberals are subtly paving the way for fascism to creep into American culture using the guise of “race” to advance their underlying agendas. Warping reality to suit their shortsighted narratives.

    1. I agree with you. To some extent there are some statues that could be moved, from areas like courthouses, but in other areas such as public parks they should remain and since it is part of the public discourse, then add context such as a plaque that there was an element ( or just the entire purpose) of using such structures as objects of intimidation at the time of their erection. But trying to delete such things, will only lead to further dissolution of the culture.

      1. Even moving the controversial statues into a contemporary museum of colonial art would be more sensible than destroying the nation’s relics.
        They should be preserved that future generations could develop a better understanding of the country’s past so as to learn from it’s mistakes and avoid them. The way things are progressing seems as if the US democratic experiment regressing into a covert socialist state to the point where historical monuments are being targeted for no good reason.

  33. Don’t be nice. Be kind, and respectful instead. I learnt it the hard way. The more I tried to be nice to people, the more they treated me like a dog shit.
    Niceness is a trait of an ass-kisser.
    Don’t be nice.
    Don’t be an ass-kisser.
    Nobody respects an ass-kisser.

  34. I think feminism was a way to make men more irrelevant and the bankers’ wars of last century left silly liberal academics, like President Wilson, and globalist socialists, like FDR, in charge of America and other nations. Sure, a little martial arts and shooting training would not be bad for a house mom to acquire, should a creep break in, but men need to be protectors of the women and children. I think this dimunization if solid men and manhood has made us liberal snowflakes, who vote upon “niceness” over reason, or worthless wife beaters or rapists.

    1. Our enemies analysed our strengths (the Patriarchy and the Nuclear Family) and realised the only way to defeat us was via destruction of these two institutions – the bedrock of western civilization.
      Our Enemies used Sun Tzu – but perhaps you know their motto better as “by way of deception, thou shalt do war”

      1. I agree. I was thinking of this Quantum Leap episode, where the bad guy is a sniveling type that got out of war, but was not a conscientous objector, or conscientious about anything, but some opportunist who was macking on the leaper’s host body’s girlfriend. Unfortunately, it seems not many returning vets fought off the perversions of the Masonic-led neo-cons and “New Left”. Yeah, they didn’t have time to get a fancy university education paid for by Mummy and Daddy, God bless ’em, but they did amazing things with an 8th grade education. Some saw the horrors of war and wanted the peace of the hippies, but the hippies were just one stage in what is now this anarchy going on by rioters in recent decade, funded by Soros or the CIA, and, of course, Antifa. They have been breaking down Christian civilization since even maybe the 50s, with its brain drain machines with two antenna, though really the 60s and on.

  35. We were programmed to be “nice guys” by the order of man (the elites). We were destined to be “leaders” by the law of God

  36. Women have two modes – Follicular and Luteal – depending on her cycle she will be in either Alpha attraction mode or Beta attraction mode.

  37. I want a man who is nice TO ME but strong in times of crisis. There is something to be said for a man who can be gentle behind closed doors and treat his wife well. Who wants a brute who has no soft inner qualities at all? For example, Poldark is the show of the moment in the UK. Women are falling all over themselves for Ross Poldark. Why is that? He is tough, brutal, even, when need be, but treats his wife tenderly. She brings out the soft side in him. That is what women mean by wanting a ‘nice’ guy.

    1. I dont buy it. Women do not mean anything when they say they want a “nice guy”, its just what they are raised to believe they want. All that matters in the scenario here is that the guy is a brute. If he wasn’t a brute, the soft qualities that you say he has would kill him when it comes to women.
      Most women believe that niceness should be an inherent quality in all human beings. This is the reason why women detest men who get upset when their nice behavior doesn’t result in dates and perhaps even sex. People shouldn’t be rewarded for qualities that are allegedly inherent. I get that.
      The problem is and I think a user here might have said it in this comment thread, is when women conflate “good” and “nice”. If I am good to people that deserve it, it means I am an inherently good person and do not act that way expecting people to reciprocate. If that behavior is confused with niceness, then most men are in deep trouble.

  38. Here is the the thing when women tell you they want a guy to be “nice” to them. Its their social conditioning of living in Western society telling you this, but their biology wants a strong man, which is what they really want but won’t say out loud because of their social conditioning. Biology will win out over whatever she was taught to believe was her ideal mate. A strong man is likely to have a higher odds of helping her produce kids, also have kids that have the traits most likely to survive in a hard world. So when they see the nice guy, they assume they are mating with a deer that will in turn produce deer like children. When they see a strong bad boy, they see the guy that will help them produce strong children. Nature and biology will always win.
    Why you think most women want a man who is always taller than they? Also one who has steady income and the ability to make sure she has a roof on her head. Most women will see the strong guy is likely to provide those things as well over the passive nice guy.
    This is also the reason why men want women who are passive, because to them they are more likely to be nurturing mothers to their offspring, their children. Its also a sign they are more fertile and able to bear children.

    1. “Here is the the thing when women tell you they want a guy to be “nice” to them”.
      Overt manipulation and coercion to get into, and stay into your resources and labor so she will have to do nothing but feed her self entitlement, for the absolute least amount of work. She MIGHT pay you in sex ( because the only currency she has is her vagina, and it is her ATM PIN code into your wallet. But to her THAT will be her CHORE not her desire. Her desire will be cucking you with some other dick while bad mouthing you when you are out of earshot.

  39. Be nice to those who deserve to be treated that way. There’s no sense in being some mega-assertive asshole to everyone. If you do that, be prepared to eat shit.

  40. Be nice is the easy way.
    Who is nice sees himself as a worthless weakling.
    Women can sense this and THATS why nice guys finish last.
    To be rude and an asshole requires a lot more.

  41. You had me until the Confederate statues bit.
    Why do the pro-Confederate people think only they have the right to be angry?
    If African-Americans *say* they don’t care about the statues, it’s because they are afraid of being killed.
    For the last time: the Confederates were murderers and traitors, who committed war crimes. The ex-Confederates and neo-Confederates were terrorists.
    At the very least, treat them the way you would treat ISIS.
    I would tear them limb from limb, just as they would have done to me.

    1. As an American black man, I really don’t care about statues, nor am I worried about being killed. Anyone who tries to kill me will end up dead. That has always been my attitude on both of those subjects. On the other hand, I am a cranky old man.

      1. Then your age explains it. African-Americans under age, say, 50 typically are scared of their own shadows when it comes to confronting real racism.
        Historically, the whites who attacked African-Americans have not wound up dead. The only example I can think of in a century is the cop who tried to kill Huey P. Newton. So your attitude is certainly not common.

        1. Thank God I haven’t had to deal with “real racism” very much in my life. I have been on the receiving end of more crap from black people than from anyone else. I have been racking my brain, trying to remember any racism aimed in my direction, and I cannot think of any instances, except for the time I failed to get a job interview because the black woman on the other end of the line thought that I was white. I guess I’m not supposed to speak proper English…

        1. I am outraged that people are trying to destroy history. The truth of our nation must remain. The good and the bad and the ugly. That is what is important. Anyone who wants to pull down statues should go join ISIS!

  42. James Martin does not represent Christianity or Catholicism. The Church of Nice is a passé religion in its death throes.

  43. For many of us, decades of having “nice” pounded into us by our parents means it is too late to change. But, we can support those who can. Time for another donation to the site.

    1. It’s never too late. I’m 50+ and finally woke up. Now whenever someone says I’m a nice guy, I firmly correct them. I am not a nice guy, I’m a good guy. A nice guy gets walked on. A good guy treats people with due respect, sets boundaries and does not get walked on.

      1. I accept your point. I have always tried to be a good human, but I never connected that with any relationship to women that was not deferential. Now I know.

      2. “Demons run when a good man goes to war
        Night will fall and drown the sun
        When a good man goes to war
        Friendship dies and true love lies
        Night will fall and the dark will rise
        When a good man goes to war
        Demons run, but count the cost
        The battle’s won, but the child is lost” – Steve Moffat

  44. being straight forward and clear spoken about your thoughts isn’t being an asshole, it’s being honest…..sucking up to a beautiful woman is the biggest fraud you can perpetrate on yourself, and she sees through it immediately……grow a pair and make her earn your attention

  45. Wait, what? Of course women like nice guys. “Could you help me move a fridge? Loan me money for shoes? Set me up with your work colleague with the tats and motorcycle? Pleeeeeeeease??? Oh you’re such a GREAT friend!”
    Women absolutely LOVE nice guys.. after all, their friendzones are full of them.

  46. I learned this long ago. You have to find the balance between being nice and being alpha. Find the right mix and women won’t have the ability to walk away from you.

  47. Online Etymology Dictionary:
    late 13c., “foolish, stupid, senseless,” from Old French nice (12c.) “careless, clumsy; weak; poor, needy; simple, stupid, silly, foolish,” from Latin nescius “ignorant, unaware,” literally “not-knowing,” from ne- “not” (from PIE root *ne- “not”) + stem of scire “to know” (see science). “The sense development has been extraordinary, even for an adj.” [Weekley] — from “timid” (pre-1300); to “fussy, fastidious” (late 14c.); to “dainty, delicate” (c. 1400); to “precise, careful” (1500s, preserved in such terms as a nice distinction and nice and early); to “agreeable, delightful” (1769); to “kind, thoughtful” (1830).

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *