There is nothing greater than the feeling of completion – of having worked on a demanding project that is important to you for a long period, and then bringing it to a successful conclusion.
David Deida, in classic book The Way of the Superior Man, writes famously that for a man to be whole he should have a mission other than women – something he is passionate about from the core of his soul to dedicate his life to.
In my experience this is true. For me, the passion happens to be writing. For another man it might be sports, or art or carpentry – anything, so long as it requires focus and exertion. Ideally, whatever you choose should be something that you are inextricably drawn to, and it should involve you making something to put out into the world – whether that be a book, a video or a great golf swing.
Too many people are passive consumers, and no wonder: there’s a whole world of content out there to be read, watched, listened to, downloaded. There is too much information and it turns us into mindless consumers. A real man is a man who produces something, who gives to the world rather than merely receives. And the great thing is, it is through this act of giving that we are happiest.
But one difficulty is that, having taken on your project, you may find yourself floundering halfway through, intimidated by the enormity of it and unable to carry on. How much easier it would be simply to give up. To go back to playing Call of Duty or watching football instead.
Here’s a tip – don’t. Just don’t. The secret to completion is consistency of effort. The secret to consistency of effort is breaking every task down to its minimum components, and executing these on a daily basis.
Don’t think about the end goal – just think about what you need to do today, and do it to the best of your ability. If you’re tired and you can only manage half an hour’s writing then just do half an hour – it’s better than nothing, and it means you’re exercising the muscles necessary to get to the end of the task. Days add up to months, months add up to years, and before you know it your project is done, and you will feel a sense of satisfaction deeper than from anything else.
Seek progress, not perfection, every day. Break everything down into manageable chunks, do whatever you can in the given time you have and don’t be hard on yourself – you can always polish later. In time, you will have successfully completed your project: and when that happens you’ll realize that completion really is better than sex.
Want to learn more about how to apply these principles in your love life? Then click here
Read More: You Will Always Face Criticism
Yes. America was better off before smart phones, text messaging, and social media.
There’s nothing more annoying than having a great sense of direction just to constantly be undermined by people around you who don’t.
The lack of self-awareness among people today is astounding. Try walking down the streets of NY.
Agreed. The lack of situational awareness due to the phone is the most troubling part to me.
A few weeks ago in my city, a young girl was hit by a commuter train because her face was buried in her phone. Sadly, it was 100% her own fault.
Might sound cynical, but at least we know Natural selection still works. LOL
Yup. I forgot to say that it was 100% Darwinian natural selection. She just wasn’t right for this world.
Absolutely agree with you!
I’ve noticed something else too: they all look the same. It’s always some “trendymobile” type of car and it’s always some skinny aspergian looking type with his little trendy-beard. They drive like shit.
Well if American men appear to be aware of their surrounding they’ll be labeled rapists by women.
I’ve noticed the lack of situational awareness as well Arirang…my thought was, this must be the golden age for muggers. One could most likely get away with near anything in public, unless the surveillance was reviewed, because no one is looking up & around.
And women sitting in car in a parking lot or driveway texting away…at night. I wonder how many got robbed or carjacked that way.
I think it is worth noting that the increase in mass shooting coincided with the rise of the internet. People can be totally isolated, becoming emotionally unstable, and thinking in pathological ways with no one around them physically to observe their increasingly bizarre and violent transformation. To compound matters the isolated person can find and communicate with only other who feel like him (think PUA hate). All of this leads to people dehumanizing others, and feeling even more isolated, depressed, and angry. People need to connect in reality to people more often.Good article.
That plus the medications they put kids on.
I’m not disputing whether shootings are more or less common now but the prevalence of social media and msm to bring it up is certainly more prolific.
The point you missed is that thumb typing into a 5″ screen is the most inefficient and time consuming way to communicate… not only is it socially retarded it is something that was largely invented by techies so they could chat online…. it’s perfect for quick messages, sharing code, addresses etc. SMS was great for directions…”i’m running late’ and so forth, but now it’s taken over from the phone call….
i can sit on the phone with someone and still work on the computer, but a text chat is all consuming… it appears to save time and be convenient, but once that back and forth starts it can eat an entire day….
not long ago companies began to cease using email because it was taking up too much time at work…. next will be all text chat… especially live text chat its the devil….
Nothing makes me wish for a meteor strike more than trying to use that little screen AND then the autocorrect keeps editing out my cuss words. And usually there’s cuss words if I have to send a damned text message with these things.
Indeed. You can say in 5 seconds on a phone what it takes nearly 5 minutes to get out through texting. But tell a kid this and they look at you like you’re retarded.
Far better off.
I am happy I avoided all that.
I use less than 100 minutes a month on my phone. I frequently have a grand total of 0 text messages in a month. I have no Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, etc accounts. I didn’t even have MySpace back when that was big.
My only contribution to this is I do have LinkedIn account because it’s useful for professional reasons.
I have never felt I was missing out by not having all that crap in my life.
You didn’t miss a damn thing.
It has definitely had an enormous impact. I personally think for the worst and growing up isn’t easy so to protect a social media image would make it a lot harder. I deleted everything and have no social media at all. Every time I would open my news feed and see some retarded post or a post gym selfie Id end up wishing for a nuclear holocaust.
Before coming to Disqus, trolls proliferated on IRC. Nothing new here. Glad for the opportunity to read torrented books on the bus by simply looking at my phone.
Right, conversation is so tedious. Stare into the screen, it’s all right, it’s your friend. Really.
America was much better off. A couple of Christmas’s ago I recall seeing most of my family huddled over their iphones all playing angry birds. I wish I could look back and laugh, but, it still makes me sad.
Yes, that’s true for us. Christmas and Thanksgiving is like an internet cafe now.
reset the wifi password. Make them use their data.
Same with us, first the kids are pacified with their devices, then the adults are. My nephew whose dad is gone 247 international business, is half ruined by my sister. She’s too soft, and he’s become a video game hermit. Namely Minecraft.
I would say it’s not the end of the world because of smart phones and social media, but I would have to agree that we are not better off.
The only thing that worked well was the cell phone, as it made communications from almost anywhere possible and it’s a good thing to have when you have a vehicle break down or some other need to “communicate in the field”. Yeah I know, Short Wave! But you practically have to become a radio tech. It’s like being the only Linux user. You want it to work, not have to get a second job of making it work.
That the smart phone is such an apex of technological development, that such things were only in science fiction even 20 years ago, and is the ONLY thing in science fiction that we got (the floating cars, warp drive, etc never happened) is amazing enough.
Therefore I must conclude that the problem is not smart phones and social media, it’s people, and a host of other factors. I’ve known plenty of aspietards who could not finish a sentence who did not do much social media and smart phone. We’ve so badly jacked up the millenial generation we can’t blame it on smart phones.
the technology molds the people to a large degree….. you can blame the people, but like einstein said, “science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.”
it’s not the individuals, it’s the cultural setting, the moral climate, the social standards and in large part the way the technology is implemented to be distracting and hyperactive… there was a time when sitting on a PC or using a cell phone was a focused business, now its all mind scatter.
Basically, we have Star Trek level computer technology. We have the ability to connect any human to any other human or piece of information that’s ever been digitized. The potential is staggering, but the main concern of cell phone companies is billing, particularly itemizing every function of the phone for separate billing.
If it was about the technology and it’s use for the betterment of mankind, things would be great, but it’s about extracting money from consumers so that’s all it does.
the funny thing is though that Steve Jobs showed that when a product is built consciously to be the best it can be, everyone goes crazy for it against all the odds…. you may not like what the iphone has become, but the concept was incredible…… it’s the narrow minded user that can’t save $600 to buy one, but wants it on a plan for free, it’s the narrow minded user that won’t pay for content and has to be spammed with advert links, it’s the narrow minded user that can’t cope with a large bill, but needs to be conned into paying the same amount of money dissected into 20 different line items….
I hate what these things are doing to this new generation; you can’t hit on a girl without being called a creep anymore because these girls can only meet men through the vetted safety of an iPhone.
Men can only approach women through Tinder. I have to use the expression “real life game” more and more when I give advice, and that, to me is what’s sad. I wish game automatically meant “real life game” and I’d have to specify “Internet game”.
At the same time I can’t fault the tech, it’s the people. A generation of kids with uninterested, absent or worked-to-the-bone-dual-income parents who don’t have time to teach their kids about the world. The kids develop an addiction to phones, instant validation, instant gratification and instantly updated content.
If used well, they are amazing devices. But they’re protein bars and protein shakes – aka, supplements. Bad lifters eat bars and shakes as their primary source of nutrition, while real lifters learn how to make real food. A phone is meant to be a social supplement, not a primary social life in and of itself.
So we can add social kills to the long list of skills that technology has made us divest (especially practical skills like building a deck or changing one’s own oil). Machines do everything for us, why not let them decide who our friends, one-night-stands and wives are too?
It’s even worse. 7 years ago I knew a woman who had a son and that boy ALWAYS had the game boy or whatever it was in front of him and his face planted in it. Yes a young aspergian in the making.
That kid is around 14-15 now and has probably lived his whole life like that since his mother, being a single mother, probably didn’t do jack about it. Heck I’m betting the reason why Dad was driven off was because he tried to be a dad and was “too aggressive” and not letting little Albert Aspie have his toy every waking moment of his life.
(the woman did strike me as the type)
Yeah, I can’t fault the tech. When I was young, we did have hand-held games. Not as good as what we have now of course – mostly simple LED games and only one game per device. If we sat there all day on them my parents would have dropped a hammer on that. Literally.
We’ve also made just about everything a kid could do a crime of some sort.
Exactly.
Even today if I go to a superbowl party or some other pleeb blue pill event, I see 20-30 year old men all checking their fantasy stats on their phones. No camaraderie.
At the gym everyone is in “Silent Tough Guy” mode, not talking and checking their phones constantly. Yet when you watch old school lifting movies, the gym is a joyous, exuberant place with lifters trash-talking each other playfully from one end to the other. When this 30 men in a gym become an anti-social setting? When those 30 men never developed the guts to look at each other eye to eye.
I can go on and on and on with examples. I honestly thing good parenting would have saved us from 50% of these issues, though some people just aren’t savable.
Remember when you were a kid and your parents would push you to talk to people, to be less shy, to ignore insults, and all that? That was actually important shit!!! I sometimes get the feeling parents are too distracted to do that anymore, and the tech is a surrogate parent.
you’d be surprised how desperate those gym heads are for human interaction though… i had a telephone meeting today with a client and all he wanted to do was chat about his recent travels….he wanted to socialize not do business… it must have been that nice to talk with another human being….
Yet when you watch old school lifting movies, the gym is a joyous, exuberant place with lifters trash-talking each other playfully from one end to the other. When does 30 men in a gym become an anti-social setting? When those 30 men never developed the guts to look at each other eye to eye.
Fantastic observation. Phones plugged into ears, staring into the distance or down at the floor or phone, no speaking, no hearing. Having went to gyms in the late 1980’s it was the exact opposite, sometimes it was even too social in a way (but looking back, that’s not so bad).
Pretty funny observation. My gym is having a Christmas party and that thought went through my head. So I’m supposed to show up and spend an hour talking to the people I’ve consciously ignored for over a year now? I think we’re all in a selective psychosis together though. If anyone decided to “buck the trend” by being social at the gym, they will immediately be labeled “the gym creeper” or something similar. You will stand out like a sore thumb. Similar when Homer Simpson wore a pink shirt to work.
You want guys to bond, get rid of the women.
LOL.
Shit my dad was making the younger ladies blush right up until 2 weeks before he died. The geezer once said to me “fuck as long as you can while you can”. He had mistresses even.
Actually the biggest problem I have in the gym is the guy that won’t shut up when I’m trying to focus. Every gym has one.
My parents aren’t ideal but one thing I remember clearly which I resented then but really appreciate now (at 17) is my dad pushing me to do things.
I used to be a very shy kid, and when you’re like that the only solution is to break those barriers and force yourself out. He always forced me to do things that my natural shy nature would not have done.
Years later, I appreciate his actions and continue to work on being more outgoing, social, and having a great ass life.
There’s a big difference between a GameBoy and an Iphone with social media. A gameboy is simply something to pass the time, similar to a book. A gameboy is designed for a solitary existence. That boy just didn’t want to communicate with people. Iphones and social media govern our interpersonal communication. They turn our interpersonal relationships into streams of letters and photos.
When I was kid I built forts in the back yard with a hammer. I started practicing nailing into blocks of wood when I was 5-7. And was pretty proficient with a hammer by 8-9. I wonder how many kids can even swing a hammer anymore? Let alone conceive the basics of constructing a solid structure, read a tape measure quickly, or saw with a non-powered hand saw. Many don’t know how to operate a lawn mower either. And chores! Did chores in households disappear completely with the divided family? Even traditional families I see no wipe board with chores on it for the kids of the household to preform weekly. Hell, then the allowance one could earn taught them early on the direct relation to work and wealth. All that gone in the wake of technological advancements.
In-person game for the average, non-celebrity guy is rapidly becoming obsolete because of “easy-fuck” apps like Tinder. A lot of guys in the manosphere will disagree with me on this. They would be wrong.
Now for chicks, if you don’t meet the guy through trendy Tinder, he’s not worth it.
Internet game, you mean masturbation? All jokes on side, things have gotten pretty bad if you have to specify “real life game”.
This friend of mine, he is “dating” a chick that he never even met. Poor chump is even like:” she is saving herself for me!” Yeah sure she is. While he is stroking it in front of the PC, she is probably busy stroking some dude herself. The sad thing is, he actually believes he will be marrying her….
ha ha ha ha!
But machines don’t do everything for us. There’s a dearth of tool using young men in the Millenial generation precisely because of this. There WILL come a day, and by a day I mean ten years or less, when you’re going to be paying some GenX plumber $200.00 an hour to unclog your toilet.
I have a 6-figure career on an executive track with all the perks.
I know plumbers and I envy them.
I’m not great with electronics and mechanics but if this economy goes to shit I’ll happily wade in shit. With my business acumen I’d manage the shit out of the business (literally and figuratively).
Funny story.
Once my grandmother told me I should re-wire my mother’s light fixtures and learn other skills like my granddad. I said “well can granddad change a hard-drive or reinstall Windows?”
LOL! He didn’t know how to switch a computer on!
Always measuring your self worth by dick size.
There is nothing anyone can learn from your ego bob.
Yeeaaaaah that has nothing to do with what I said.
You have written a lot of bullshit here. I approach girls all the time without this issue. Maybe you are the problem.
All this technology serves to make us exactly what we have become; excellent consumers. With no idea how to establish meaningful social interactions people look for other means to fullfillment, and wouldn’t you know it; the corporations market the answer as MORE technology! “Stay connected! Follow your friends! Be cool and hip!” So many commercials of pretty young people laughing and smiling and having fun and always, always using their phones. Remember kids, don’t ever leave your home without your smartphone!
Now that I think of it, this puts me in mind of something from Revelations…
The sheeple think I’m weird because I no longer carry a cell phone around.
I do all my calling using VOIP for $3 a month. No WiFi? No calling. I also don’t go around checking useless garbage 24/7 and I’m not mentally masturbating myself with a device in public like the average lab rat out there.
The funny thing is I can’t receive text messages on my VOIP number and this drives my employer nuts because they actually have to call me. Illustrates how even the most basic human contact is avoided now, and everything we do has become transactional in nature.
Respect. I’m considering taking this option up and turning my cell phone into a wall phone.
Changes in technology and communications always carry with them positive and negatives. I agree that, with regard to social media, the net effect for most people has probably been more negative than positive. Most people rely on the technology to the detriment of their other skills and abilities.
On the other hand, it is easy to forget that some aspects of social media have literally been life-saving. I can communicate with girls around the world nearly instantly by using WhatsApp. I can develop contacts, practice language, pipeline ahead of foreign travel, and refresh old or forgotten social contacts from years ago. Viewed from this perspective, one could say that social media is a critical “escape hatch” for guys who are living in America but want access to women from around the world. This was very difficult in the old days.
The verdict is still out on social media. A compelling argument can be made that, properly used and applied, it can be a big enhancement to life, game, and learning.
You have a point there.
For example: I remember every other old codger back in the day talking about “the good old days” when “cops didn’t take crap from any hippies or punks”.
Now look how we see on social media that the cops “not taking crap” are murdering people left and right and getting away with it. The “good old days” were not really good because the truth was not known (my dad used to tell me the stories of the “good old days” when cops would outright kill people and would tell me never trust a cop).
Again, I think the problem is the people. If cell phones had existed in the 1950s, you would not have seen so much crappy driving from phone usage nor laws needed to curtail it because people were not as self-centered back then. We have good technology coming at the worst time.
Hopefully the best of this stuff will survive and the rotten people do not.
You’re putting the cart before the horse. People in the 1950’s were not as narcissitic precisely because they did not have the wide array of tools to allow them to retreat to an electronic shell of solitude 24/7. Give them cell phones and texting and by 1960 they’d be in the same pickle we are now.
The police are a societal issue, and you’re right. iZombie tech is deeper than that, it’s basically clipping humanity from its base of social communication abilities.
Honestly, I don’t know. I think it heads for a chicken and egg question. Your points have merit. I’ll have to take note and consider them.
you think you need that junk, but in truth you don’t… i moved about the world just fine with no cell phone, never mind all the chitter chatter…. i kept in touch with girls by snail mail, rolled off long haul flights and navigated with a paper map, found old friends at stadium concerts with pure intuition…. technology is not an improvement… it’s like a guy in a wheel chair telling you how great life has been since he can wheel himself about….
I used to keep track of my tailgating buddies over facebook.
When I finally deleted mine, I would just show up to the game and find them. Nobody needs facebook. Just go to where people are and bring beer.
yeah… the blind man will feel incredible when he gets artificial vision, even if he has tunnel vision and can only read one letter at a time.
That’s true, and I used to believe that for the most part. The problem arises from the fact that when everyone else is using something, and you are not, you are going to look strange. And let’s face it…many, if not most, people are going to cut you out of the loop because of that alone. It shouldn’t be that way, but it is.
There is a value to be had in the immediacy of the communication.
Good luck trying to game girls without text messaging or instant messaging.
Then look strange. Great men don’t follow the herd and aren’t afraid of being different. As for text messaging girls I never do that before I’ve fucked them a few times. By conceding to text you are playing into her frame. When I call a girl and she picks up the phone, they are noticeably more submissive and open to any plans I make because I’ve forced them into my world.
The verdict is not still out. Everything C said is true. People have nearly lost the ability to communicate face to face, and it’s clear the moment you try to engage a Millenial for more than 30 seconds on a topic deeper than Jello pudding. Women are glued to these fucking devices and will NEVER put them down. I’ve read complaints from some men that their friggin’ ho beasts check FB *during sex*.
It’s great to have the Library of Congress at your fingertips, yes, but the price for that is Tinder, OKCupid, FB, constant texting and a near total breakdown of relevant and crucial social skills. If you ever wonder why, despite the fact that we are basically devolving into a tyranny, that nobody does anything, you need look no further than the idiots walking into sign posts on the sidewalk while staring into their iZombie.
I agree completely. The implications of what is happening are much more profound and severe than the “good points / bad points” argument can encompass. If present trends continue (and they rarely do), we are living through a transformation of what it means to be a human being as radical as that which took place from paganism to Christianity. Every social and cultural lunacy that has been implemented over the last decade owes its instrumental victory to the increased mediation between people.
Earlier this year some jackass where I live walked into an open manhole that had safety cones around it. Fell all the way down into the sewer, assuming 12-20’+ drop, broke his leg.. Also, the hearing damage done by 24/7 having damn headphones on listening to low talent level, high production quality music will slowly prevail, and reinforces the ignorance of a failing generation.
I agree pretty soon we’ll all be reduced to a bunch of grunts and clicks. Butt scratching apes will have better social skills ..
QC, I imagine you on your smart phone, thousands of feet in the air, reading Horace as your flight takes you to a rendezvous with a classy woman in a happier place than America in 2014. I think now about most people in this country today, and see that trifling Tinder “moments” and Facebook pics of this or that blockhead’s chef salad are the more likely uses to which the fancy gadgets are put.
Heheh…lol.
Yeah, you’ve got a point there, CC. This is not an easy subject to deal with. I basically agree with everything you say. I hate these gadgets as much as anyone, and I hate how they’ve insinuated themselves into our lives. But we’re stuck with them now and we have to deal with them.
The only problem is that, if guys like us completely banish them, it is going to curtain severely your social life. Texting and messaging has now become the norm. If you don’t do it, you’re putting yourself at a severe disadvantage.
You can’t give up that easily. These aren’t things that are mandated by law. They are largely female-centric devices which we have every option to dispose.
Deleting your social media accounts won’t fuck up your social life. If you don’t want to text, just ring up the phone. We all hate these things. Lets stop using them.
“Texting and messaging has now become the norm. If you don’t do it, you’re putting yourself at a severe disadvantage.”
Following the herd is more than a severe disadvantage – it is damaging to male identity. If a man cannot stand out from the crowd, what hope does he have?
I will start communicating by smoke signals, like native Americans once did. Maybe it catches up (lol) and if so, I will own the tribe.
I’ve been off on a day-long hike in some mountain in Asia (full wi-fi coverage still). Bring my kindle to read some Gary Snyder which goes so well with a day hike. Click on facebook, read a post from an old buddy I haven’t seen face to face in 20 years, scroll through the comments of other old buddies, enemies, people who saw me at my most awkard, whatever. Get ‘triggered’ back 20 years and spend my day in the Asian mountains, thinking about high school ‘could have beens’ How f’ing depressing is that? Pitiful. I’ve been realizing recently how all of that sentiment, right in that gadget in your pocket, gets you living life backwards. Any old song, image, trivia, realm, whatever. All in your pocket. It’s killing me and I’ve been cutting down too. I actually fantasize about the days pre-internet. It was so clean. You were living the day and moving forward, not lugging around a lifetime of sentiment accessed by a wallet sized magic box.
“Was America Better Off Before Smart Phones, Text Messaging, And Social Media?”
I would say “hell yeah!”
There certainly no other technology that has ruined women faster. Once the smartphones come to a culture, watch for zombie bitches.
—
In the near future you won’t just break up with someone by text, you will actually be able to legally divorce. Hypergamy is accelerating.
new acronym…. GOYP Get Off Your Phone
If someone could figure out a way to surgically implant a smartphone on your hand you might get some takers. There are people who constantly have to look down at their smartphone all day long. For these people it has become a behavioral addiction, in other words a non-narcotic reward mechanism. So when they look down at their phone and see a notification of a new message they get a temporary high from it. Sounds crazy but I think it might be true.
When I’m out with friends or at a family event, if I notice several people are looking at their phones and the conversation is dwindling I will ask everyone to put down their phones so we can have a real interaction, Surprisingly people don’t get offended by that. It’s ok to check your phone on occasion, just don’t be glued to it.
Its altered the bar / club scene. People more interested in what’s on their phones than what’s around them.
have you noticed how hardly anyone dances anymore ?
i remember thrashing out at metaliica concerts in the 80s and going to acid house raves and dancing all night, coming home like i’d run a marathon….. now people just bob their heads…..
Haha. Just saw Slayer last night. Brutal. Made my friends ear bleed, literally. We hovered around the pit.. both of us near 40 yo. Show was badass.
Yea, there’s some great meme’s floating around about that. Like we all came here to hang out but stare down at a phone.. really really fucking dumb. Last year I watched the groupie of one of the greatest metal bands in history stare down at her phone for 75% of the show from mix position at the sound board. Smoking 22 yo blonde 8.5. With 3000 rowdy metal heads around her, and nothing better to do than be on her phone ignoring most of the show. Unreal.
That’s fucking depressing. Got to email her a dick pic.
Cell phones break down the barrier between private and public life. Bosses now expect every employee to be on-call 24-7. People used to have some pride about this- “I don’t have an answering machine” used to be “my time is my time”
Now, you come back after your day off: “Why didn’t you answer your phone yesterday?” “I was off…” “Bullshit! We needed you!” and you’re fucked.
Also, now “I sent you an email” is equivalent to “You agreed…”
Everybody assumes you have your email in your pocket and you read them all immediately, and immediately act on the information therein contained.
“We never discussed this,” isn’t an excuse. If you got an email, you’re obligated.
If you ask me it’s just another way to make every wage slave even more slavish.
Many moons ago my boss ask me to carried one of those 7kg phones to a rock and roll bar to do the “stand by” thing
I broke rule number one, I answered the phone while drunk. I have not used a mobile phone since
That’s your fault. Set boundaries. My employer knows that unless I say otherwise when I am off the clock, I am off the clock.
Boundaries are important. Set them from day one.
A good point, but the way they get around this now is by paying you a salary. You are never truly off the clock then, as hourly workers are.
If I finish work at 6 pm I finish work at 6 pm. Salary or wage makes no difference here.
When it comes to on-line dating, I wonder if men are as guilty for flaking as women are. Speaking personally, I know I’m just as guilty of it (if I don’t feel up to the date I text some lame excuse or don’t bother texting at all). This, though, is a product of how women have treated me, so I have no compunction about turning the tables.
Interestingly, I distinctly remember about 10 years ago I had but two dates with a women; and I actually picked up the phone and called her to tell her it wasn’t working out. Just two dates. I respected her as a human being. Now I can have 5, 6 dates with a woman and suddenly the texts stop… and that’s that.
I agree. It’s too easy to avoid any kind of ‘This isn’t working’ conversation face-to-face, by just never contacting them again. I’m in my 20s and any guy my age who says he’s never done this is lying.
Let it be that. If she’s an American woman, chances are she WANTS to be pumped and dumped.
And speaking in general, when it comes to romance, most women don’t really want to be happy; they want to be emotionally tortured (of course, dick and cash are also vital). Just consider how well cold and aloof men generally do as opposed to the nice guy who doesn’t play games.
Was “America” better? Guys, the entire fucking PLANET was better!
The technology is neutral. Whether technology has a positive or negative effect depends on how it is utilized. Overall it has been a negative for the United States. People are losing their social skills and ability to communicate in person. Don’t let that happen to you.
Just make sure you use the technology available to better yourself. Learn a language, download books, keep contact with people that you wouldn’t normally be able to, or anything else to further you growth and progression.
Also, calling someone has gone to Hell. Call someone now (especially a woman whose smartphone is never further than her extended arm) and they answer the phone all askance, like “Hellooooo?” with a deep suspicion and hesitation in their voice. Oh I’m sorry, did I interrupt you Snapchatting a salad to your schmuck army? Silly me!
I’ll be goddamned if the only eye contact I make with people anymore is actually “iContact”!
Very amusing that few women under 30 now can be bothered to talk on the phone. I often think to myself: “This bitch wants me to put my dick in her–to do which we must first talk in person–and yet she can’t talk on the phone like a fucking adult…”
Dude, stop interrupting her Instagramming herself in spandex in the gym’s bathroom after she just did a whopping five whole minutes on every type of cardio machine and saying “hashtag-healthyisthenewpretty”, okay? 😉
HA!
My gym has a no camera policy. But people still are hooked up to the phones for listening to music, even a couple of dildos who actually try to talk on the phone while using machine weights. I think some businesses like gyms and clubs and restaurants should use phone jamming technology inside. People can out to their cars in the parking lot if its that important to them.
Snapchatting a salad to a schmuck army. What an evil genius it must take to realize that this would actually be a fad and profit off it. Imagine yourself ten years younger hearing that you’d be “liking” photos of your friends food.
What’s so sad is when something actually cool is made, like a new song by a musician friend, etc.. and it’s pretty good, and it gets 3-4 likes, but a fuckin plate of food get’s 50 likes.
Good points and good article. It’s all about moderation.
I can live with or without it because I grew up without it (many years before smart phones, mobile phones, social media, etc…). The key is to turn off your phone (maybe take it with you and leave it in the car) or just leave it at home once in awhile. You’d be surprised…but the break from it is what people need, today.
People are plugged in all of the time, now. It used to be the PC (desktop) but now with the smartphone it’s all of the time.
Do yourself a favor and practice. Leave the phone off or at home a couple of times. It will work wonders for you in all areas of your life.
Technology is often perceived as a culprit to the breakdown of social human interaction, when in my experience it is more like the reverse – gradual breakdown of communities, groups, etc., coupled with these technological artifices we use to communicate nowadays developing exponentially, turns vast amounts of people inwardly. Hence arrogance, narcissism, self-indulgence. Which is better – interact with technology, which you can control (on the face of it) almost completely, or with a person, which is far less predictable and harder to control?
Some will say that the internet has made us free. I say, the internet (and other surrogates for real life human interaction) when incorrectly used, has the potential to make one a prisoner in his/her own mind.
It’s funny sometimes, like when my niece, just 10yrs younger than me, visited recently with her 6yr old kid, the kid sees my record player spinning and immediately that natural curiosity springs up – despite being completely immersed in iPad games before I play something out of my vinyl collection.
I felt proud of that moment.
When, due to the current trends, the natural curiosity that drives socialization gets reduced to almost nothing apart from “googling” and “networking”, moments such as above will be truly precious.
Internet site “They are gonna chip you! Mark of the Beast!”
No, they aren’t. You are walking around with a device that gives complete fucking access to your life and you are paying for it because it makes you hip and cool. Easier to monitor a willing customer than chip a person by force or a requirement.
Call history
Location
Browsing history
Address book
Remote activation
Microphone
Video Camera
A chip isn’t going to do that.
Well if one good thing came from all this crap it’s that we now have hard proof of the true nature of women, and that genie ain’t going back in the bottle.
I also credit blogging and YouTube for shaking the political establishment and neutering much of the MSM.
I hate smartphones. It allows people (especially women) an cop out of dealing with uncomfortable social situations instead of learning how deal with and overcome them. It also disconnects and limits real human interaction with real people. In short, it make people become more socially retarded overtime and replace actually social skills with technology.
I got two “Happy Thanksgiving” texts from my sisters. Nice. Just like they did it in the old country.
I (’88) miss the 90’s. After school, go play with the fellas, then we all go back to whoever’s house had a Sega.Then 1st yr of high school, everyone had that same Nokia brick phone, now where here..I think back then, those were better times for everyone.
yeah, America was better off a scant 8 or 9 years ago. Instant access to information/stuff doesnt mean you can instantly analyze something.
Thank you for writing this. If three babies ever needed to be aborted it was Zuck, Jobs, and that dude from Snapchat. Smartphones and social media have been crippling devastations to human culture.
Human interaction has become completely transactional. People are so easily dismissed through ignoring text messages. We (mostly females) now live on social media to impress strangers.
I’ve deleted all my social media accounts and decided my current smartphone will be my last. Back when I had a Facebook, 2% of my “friends” were people I cared about. When I had an Instagram, I used to get 40 different “likes” from people that haven’t interacted with me in years. Men need to mass-boycott this narcissistic matriarchal beast. Social media and smartphones are straight up designed for female narcissism and we’re playing directly into that flaky hand.
I’ve had some of my best friends ignore texts in slightly awkward situations, never to be heard from again. I’ve lost business deals through text message. We’ve all had the great radio silence after wasting time and money on a female. I’ve felt a distinct difference in human interaction coinciding with the birth of every social media fad. Facebook. Iphone. The “like”. Instagram. Snapchat “Stories.” Each of these have unleashed a predictable wave of narcissism from my female acquaintances and a not-so predictable wave of solipsism from my closest male comrades.
I’m very young but I still remember when my first relationship trial runs were tested over multiple telephone calls. I remember when you had to look someone in the eye and tell them that it wasn’t working out. I remember when you spoke words to your best friends when a great event happened in your life. I remember going out, drinking, dancing and living in the moment, for better or worse.
Technology supporters say it brings the world together and makes us more connected. I’ve never felt more alone and isolated. It seems ironic that I’m communicating this to you through a form of social media which has brought us all together but it makes sense. Our Discus profiles are a gigantic wall between us men who should be chopping it up, giving advice, and talking about this shit man-to-man.
Sorry guys, the Unabomber was right. If you haven’t read the manifesto then check it out. It’s a great piece of literature.
The wost is the google glass. I heard some guy got punched in the face for wearing that into a club in SF.
Technology supporters say it brings the world together and makes us more connected. I’ve never felt more alone and isolated.
That was an excellent line in an excellent post. Well said.
Ironically, one day after I made that post I check the instagram of the chick I’m seeing: a teddy bear from “the boy” I politely asked if she had a boyfriend. Radio silence. I then texted her in a slightly more confrontational matter saying that if she’s seeing someone else she could at least have the human decency to answer that question. She said she’s “talking” to him and I told her I wouldn’t play second fiddle and that was that.
Very strange how that all happened immediately after this article! I’m glad the red pill taught me not to emotionally invest in women-I would have gone apeshit had I given a fuck about females.
I never liked cell phones. I used to really hate them. Now I am starting to see how impossible it is to live without one these days. How do you contact people and make plans without texting? Some people literally dont answer phone calls.
This article, however, reinvigorated my feelings not to get one. Live in the moment and seize the day.
Yes.
In addition to the article these mediums you speak of are also a detriment in analyzing current events. For example, if you hear of a murder happening 500 miles away in any favorite app that can provide that news instantly (twitter, for instance) you may think there is an epidemic of murders nearby. The same happens with rape, school shootings, murder-suicides….we localize what is happening even thousands of miles away. Paranoia sets in. Anyone can create a lie on facebook/twitter/instagram, etc. and spread it instantly to a million people who will believe the lie.
Social media, smartphones, and the MSM have turned me away from libertarianism. A dictator or monarchy which valued its citizens true interests would ban smartphones and heavily regulate social media.
The necessity to mediate human interaction with a machine means that the current generation is sexually stunted – they are not good lovers. How could they be? People are losing their tactile skills, of which sex is the most obvious. A girl and boy who have reduced their consciousness and their tactile experience to a 5 inch flat screen cannot possible know how to caress, how to touch, how to arouse except in the most obvious and vulgar manner – thus, pseudo-porn is now the norm. To my eye and experience, they are completely lacking in all Sensuality. American Millennial girls have the sensual touch, warmth, playfulness and feel of a camp guard. A good woman used to be able to express more sexuality and desire, coupled with pregnant ambiguity, with a tilt of her, with a certain gesture, with a look, than modern girls can totally naked in your bed, with their shaved pussies, their tattoo and their fucking iPhone.
Read the opening chapter to Milan Kundera’s Immortality. Yes, that really existed.
The cons do out-weight the pros by quite a damn lot. The only major positive that I can make of them is the ability to say anonymously online something that you couldn’t say in person. But it is perhaps this that has turned our society inward among a myriad of other factors.
And lets not even begin discussing their effect on women, half of us probably wouldn’t be here just because of that. American women have had their men by the balls for a few decades with the help of the draconian family court laws and general pervasive culture arrayed against the hard-working provider male. Now with the help of Mr. Zuckerberg’s “printing press of the 21st century” and Co. as he had the indecency to call it – are relishing their day in the sun at giving them a good hard squeeze too.
The proliferation of technology has indeed happened so fast that few have really stopped to contemplate it. This is a timely article because I’ve become most aware of it during holidays. For whatever reason — nostalgia, tradition, or media mass marketing we still maintain the trappings of a bygone era during these times. We are going through the motions, yet no one really cares. Thanksgiving dinners, picnics, parades, fireworks have not only become boring to us, they’ve become drudgeries. This is because it takes people away from their favourite activity — screen time. Yes, the size of the screen does not matter. Whether its Netflix on a 50″ screen or Twitter on a 3″ inch screen or a freshly downloaded book on a 10″ screen, people now want their screen time. Any forced deviation from their slavish devotion to a screen of some kind is a real chore. Yet society still is living in denial, so we are still bothering with 20th century stuff like pardoning a Thanksgiving turkey, lighting a Christmas tree, or movies in the park. I don’t expect this denial to last much longer and it will become more and more commonplace for people to reject doing any activities in favour of staying put on the couch with the beloved touch screen.
Back in the early 90s I used to call up girls on their home phone, asking the father to talk to the daughter, and then overhear the muffled (hand on receiver) conversation as they explained who I was and why I was calling. Then you go to pick them up, and you have to go to the door, because honking is for barbarians, and of course they were never ready so you had to make small talk with the dad or the mom was asking you if you wanted some leftover dinner or fruit or a drink or whatever.
I never got any threats, but I would say it slowed down my advances regardless because you at least got a sense there was more to the girl than what was keeping your soldier at attention.
I imagine now you don’t even see the parents. Just text and play some angry birds or whatever while you wait for them to come out.
Pretty much. Plus if your semi-beefed up and in high school the pussy ass dad just watches as you take his daughter, basically signaling to him you will be fucking her wild, while he just nods away like the little slouched drone that he is. Or in most cases, its the single mom who wishes you would fuck her instead of her younger prettier version. Yeah right haha bitch get out the way!
I’m currently in mediation with my ex over child support and custody. One of her arguing points, that went on so long we had to reschedule the lengthy mediation for a later date, was her not being able to contact me at any given moment she deemed suitable. I had to argue, to 3 lawyers, that there is no way in hell you can expect to have 247 digital access to someone, as they as lawyers could not operate their lives in a similar manner.
We literally set, which will be written into court ordered guidelines, reasonable response times for texts, phone calls, emails, emergencies, and the definition of these all. As well as, the exact time windows each type of communication is appropriate and acceptable. The technology has made life a pain in the ass cluster fuck. And in the hands of women,10x that confusion prevails every time. A logical device in the hands of an illogical, emotionally driven monster like Woman 2.0 USA edition, is an amplifier for all her senselessness, and should be taken away.
As a non-practicing lawyer, my thoughts go out to you, genuinely. Best of luck. If there is no Heaven, there is no Hell, only an endless Purgatory of small print…
No matter how many articles have been written about this on ROK, it’s still great to read and it doesn’t get old. The sad part is that there is nothing we can do to stop this zombification of humans due to excessive tech and it’s only bound to get worse and worse. I guess the huge upside is being able to meet people romantically, socially or otherwise, that we would never be able to or have a reason to meet otherwise. Whether the price we pay is too high – the time will show.
It’s a brave new world my son, a brave new world..
my suggestion, take a few feelies and thank the Ford you weren’t created a lower epsilon male.
Now let’s all take our daily soma ( or Facebook, twitter, whatever), have casual sex with out equivalents and reject independent thought.
Ford forbid it!
I’m retired and only turn on my cell phone when it’s useful. My landline has caller ID and I never answer or return calls unless completely identified and then only if I want to. I may not have as much time left as many but most of that times is MINE.
This is a timely article. Just yesterday I was thinking how great smartphones are and wondering how we got along without them. Where before I could only get hold of someone when they were at home or at work now I can reach them anywhere. When before getting a message to someone required the chore of calling them, now I can send them an instant message free of charge and get on with my day. I can contact people anywhere in the World instantly and for free. What’s not to love?
I think you are confusing the inability of making conversation with being young. Young people frequently suck at conversation because of their lack of understanding or confidence. Smartphones have nothing to do with it.
I think you are practicing that age old need of humans to “complain about something”. There are things to complain about but smartphones are not it. Hell, they make reading and contributing to this site really easy!
You know, the West did cool things like build industrial empires, go to the moon, and win World Wars without these silly little things.
Please don’t make stupid comments.
What does that have to do with a smartphone or social media? You can send texts and contact anyone at anytime with a basic flip phone. Smartphones just implanted social media into the hands of American females.
I refer to my last line about reading and contributing to this site. Consider that in the context of your argument. Also I frequently contact people using social media. That’s what makes it free.
Also, yesterday I ordered a speed rope using my smartphone. And groceries.
I think you need to understand that a smartphone is a tool much like a hammer or a gun. What someone does with a smartphone says more about the person than the tool. Am I a murderer because I own a gun?
What have smartphones actually done to advance civilization? They gave inferior games, GPS, cameras, flashlights which we already had. They have hardly any utilitarian purpose.
I’d also outlaw guns if more than half of society was homicidal maniacs.
Smartphones are portable social media.
Social media is probably the least of what I use a smartphone for. Sounds like you are under-utilising yours.
What do you mean by “civilisation”? I can only speak for myself when I say that smartphones have greatly improved my life.
Tell me how to utilize my smartphone to greatly improve my life. Do you work for Apple? I knowingly under utilize my smartphone. I have tried different social media apps and couldn’t stand the constant degeneracy.
When is refer to civilization: what have they done for us besides compacting different devices and utilizing it for extreme short term gain?
What I can tell you is that my productivity and free time have increased as a result of smartphones. I can order groceries and respond to your comments while sitting on the train. Brilliant.
Anyone keeping tabs on Stephen Hawkings latest robotic utterance? Our first steps into the Matrix?
http://www.bbc.com/news/technology-30290540
A few weeks ago I had a business trip to LA and visited my alma mater – USC, for the first time in 20 years. I have fond memories of walking the campus and seeing beautiful women everywhere – talking in groups, playing frisbee, walking to class, etc…
Instead I saw a swarm of zombies walking around with their heads down looking at phones.
I have a few bars that I frequent in my village. On more than a few occasions people have literally been amazed that I don’t take my phone into the bar. I had to tell a buddy who’s like a chick with his phone that I left my house to, you know, talk to other people and enjoy human interaction. Big light bulb went off for him. Another time I was chatting up a girl (I’m a widower) and she had to write her number on a napkin…she told me it was a big turn on.
If you disconnect you become exotic.
Smooth style my friend. I do carry my phone into bars, etc… but rarely ever take it out if i’m already there with people and talking. Although this has become such a part of the norm, people(specifically women) get pissed if you don’t answer right away. I’ve heard many women bitch about this and they always get agreeable nods. Brave new world
Cell phones make the hamster go crazy. All that attention that makes a cunt feel so special
It’s really that simple. Men want sex, women want attention. Women used to have to utilize romantic relationships with men in order to gain attention. Now unlimited attention is being delivered to their Iphones with very little sexual benefit to men.
I was just talking to a friend about this exact topic yesterday. How the internet ruined human interaction, the art of seduction, spontaneity, and life in general. Must every women be listening to her head phones, is her music is that great and important to her that she cant go 30 minutes without hearing it. Its amazing how many time you cant say hi or hello or even good evening to a woman because she has those dam ear buds in. Especially at a bar/night club (and I’m sure this is a no brainier to all) the women are too busy with their faces buried in there phones seeing which guy from tinder they are going to hook up with that night rather than trying to be seduced or swept off their feet by an actual person! I never go out any more due to this reason. Waste of money and time. I wish I grew up in the 70’s, the stories I hear about those times seem like the timeI would have loved to have been in my prime.
According to Marxists, the world was better off without automobiles too.
Just like Big Brother in 1984, thought too many words in the dictionary were confusing people. So they took most of them out. Same for books. Too many. And too many websites spewing nonsense. But, I feel we don’t need a law against them. But Marxists and feminists do. On the other hand, you should know, I did not read past the headline.
Read the Unabomber Manifesto, he was talking about this some 20+ years ago.
The worst invention EVER.
Great article No one has said anything about how smartphones have made driving or being on the road a deadly endeavor. Texting and driving is just as dangerous as drunk driving and half of drivers do it. I ride my bike most of the time and I can see when I roll up on them that they’re texting.
Cell phones have ruined social interaction and how people should converse. I could go on and on but we need to start making this a movement of shunning smartphones and start ball busting on friends that cant live 5 minutes without checking in. Tell them that constant validation on social media and texting is a bitch chick thing to do. We need a new name for these types of self obsessed cunts male and female. N.S.A’s.. narcissistic smartphone addicts. Shun and shame these insecure constant validation blue pill pussies.