While much digital ink has been spilled warning men to stay away from narcissistic women, there isn’t a whole lot of literature on inverted narcissist women. Inverted narcissists (also known as inverts, covert narcissists or codependents) share many traits with overt (regular) narcissists, with the biggest difference being how they interact with others. Regular narcissists are vampires who seek to draw adulation (narcissistic supply) from other people, while inverted narcissists offer themselves as supply. In other words, regular narcissists are predators and inverted narcissists are prey.
The main reason why codependent women are so dangerous is because they outwardly possess many of the traits that neomasculine men want: they’re feminine, submissive and deferential. What separates an invert from a genuinely feminine woman is that the former doesn’t simply seek to submit to a strong man: she craves psychological (and in many cases, physical) abuse. Not only that, codependents will themselves abuse any man who isn’t narcissistic enough to satisfy their masochism.
I have extensive experience with inverted narcissist women because my personality attracts a lot of girls who lean towards codependency. Here’s how you can identify covert narcissist women and avoid them.
The Origins Of Inverted Narcissism
The term “inverted narcissism” was coined by Sam Vaknin in his book Malignant Self-Love: Narcissism Revisited. Vaknin defines the invert as someone who seeks to subsume her identity into that of a narcissist’s, a perfect fit as narcissists seek others to merge into them and provide narcissistic supply. In contrast to classic narcissists, inverts tend to be shy, emotionally sensitive, outwardly fragile, and self-deprecating.
Like classic narcissists, inverted narcissists have no self-esteem and lack a unique personality. However, while classic narcissists will construct a false reality and demand others acknowledge that reality, inverts seek to become part of a narcissist’s false reality. An invert’s existence revolves around attaching herself to a narcissist like a barnacle, constantly trying to please him and providing him with supply (which is her form of supply), until he gets bored and kicks her to the curb.
Vaknin identifies abusive, narcissistic parenting as one of the primary causes of codependency. Similarly, in her book Will I Ever Be Good Enough? Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers, Dr. Karyl McBride shows that narcissistic mothers often produce codependent daughters. Through their manipulations and antics (for example, McBride discusses one woman whose mother would seduce her boyfriends when she was a teenager), narcissistic mothers train their daughters to provide supply and sublimate their identities into theirs, preventing them from developing personalities of their own.
Inverted narcissists are incapable of sustaining relationships with non-narcissists, because they crave the drama and abuse that only a narcissist can provide. Indeed, codependent women will often act like classic narcissists when they’re in relationships with non-narcissist men, similar to how classic narcissists will take on codependent traits when their false realities are shattered. For example, Tucker Max, a self-admitted narcissist, had a nervous breakdown following the collapse of his media empire in 2008.
How To Identify Inverted Narcissist Women
Note that there are degrees of inverted narcissism, so not all inverts will display these traits in equal measure. Additionally, some of the traits of inverts overlap with other personality disorders, such as BPD.
1. They have no boundaries. Inverts love to manipulate men by being inappropriately sexual or telling them extremely private information about their personal lives. If a codependent woman gets you alone, you’ll probably be hearing TMI stories of her childhood while she tries to give you a back rub (even though you’re just friends) within ten minutes.
2. They constantly insult themselves. While overt narcissists love to talk themselves up, covert narcissists love to talk themselves down. An invert will often call herself “crazy,” “ugly,” “loser” and other put-downs, reflecting her lack of self-esteem.
3. They’re clingy to the point of becoming stalkers. An invert will never shut up about how she wants to be “married” or “meet a good man,” even as she stumbles from one failed relationship to the next. She’ll also use creepy terms that indicate her desire to subsume herself into a narcissist. Don’t be surprised if she says she wants to “give [herself] to you” or wants you to “keep [her] until [you] die,” or claims she’s suffering from “relationship withdrawal” after she gets dumped.
4. They never take responsibility for anything. Covert narcissists always blame their problems on everyone else and love inventing fantastical victim stories. When her boyfriend leaves her for another woman, it’s because he’s having a “mid-life crisis”; when she gets fired from her job, it’s because her boss is a jerk; when she cheats on her husband, it’s because she was “drunk” and “horny.” In her mind, nothing is ever her fault.
5. They’re emotionally labile and engage in splitting. Codependents don’t do nuance. One day, she’ll say you’re her “best friend” and the love of her life, and the next, she’ll say you’re an asshole who always treats her like shit. There’s no middle ground.
6. They mirror men they’re attracted to. Inverts often change their personalities and behavior to match the men they’re dating, though not to the degree that borderlines do. For example, if you drum your fingers when you’re bored or irritated, she’ll start doing it too.
7. They have high libidos and orgasm extremely easily. A disproportionate number of codependents are squirters and almost all of them orgasm easily from normal, vaginal sex. In some cases, they don’t even need or want foreplay: they’ll just get naked and sit on your cock. Much how they lack interpersonal boundaries, inverts lack sexual boundaries: you can treat them like rented mules in bed and a disproportionate number of them are bisexual.
8. They’re extremely promiscuous. Like overt narcissists, a covert narcissist will use sex as a weapon to get what she wants, whether she’s sleeping around on her boyfriend because “he won’t have sex with [her]” or blowing a drug dealer for a discount (because she’s not attractive enough to get a freebie). But it’s okay in her mind, because she’ll hang her head in shame and call herself a “giant whore” afterwards, hoping for your sympathy.
9. They lack empathy. An invert only cares about pleasing you so long as you’re narcissistically sucking her dry (and thus providing her with her form of supply). She’ll think nothing of stringing you along in a loveless relationship so long as she’s getting her jollies, and when you genuinely need her, she’ll skate off and tell you you had it coming.
10. They’re extremely passive-aggressive. If an invert is upset at you, she will almost never confront you directly. Instead, she’ll spread rumors around, bait you into getting angry at her, and publicly gaslight you. (Hilariously, she’ll accuse you of doing these same things to her.)
11. They constantly lie to themselves and others. Like borderlines, the invert has the ability to suppress and forget things that contradict her narcissistic narrative. This allows her to tell the most ridiculous lies with a straight face, an extreme version of George Costanza’s maxim, “It’s not a lie if you believe it.”
12. They’re often alcoholics or drug addicts. A codependent will often cope with the emptiness of her existence by self-medicating with booze, cigarettes or antidepressants. She may also try to get attention by making frequent suicide attempts.
Avoiding Inverted Narcissist Women
As a confident, masculine man, you’ll attract codependent women who will mistake your confidence for narcissism, and being with one is like getting hooked on a drug. What kind of man doesn’t want a girlfriend or wife who dotes on him constantly and thinks he’s the greatest guy in the world? The problem is that the kind of girl who worships the ground you walk on is also the kind of girl who will arbitrarily decide you’re the biggest piece of shit on Earth the minute your clown game isn’t perfectly on point.
While it’s possible to enthrall an inverted narcissist by adopting narcissistic traits yourself—as inverts are more like wind-up automatons than actual human beings—faking a personality disorder is untenable in the long run. A codependent woman treats her man like a nuclear reactor, inserting and removing control rods to get him to act the way she wants. Being with one is like being strapped to a roller coaster in which you’re constantly getting splattered with other peoples’ vomit.
At the end of the day, trying to heal an inverted narcissist woman is like trying to keep a skunk from smelling bad. Inverts inexorably crave narcissists; they’re incapable of dealing with men who aren’t trying to use them. If you meet one, run away from her and don’t look back.
Read More: Beware The Coming Breed of “Pro-Male” Women
Makes sense. I’ve met more than a few girls like this in my time, but I’m not nearly narcissistic enough (or desperate enough) to go for them.
Addendum: Some of these are almost ubiquitous traits of women. I’ve not met one who treats confidence as anything but narcissism, and we are all familiar with the commonality of lies and passive aggression. Most are going to be dependent on a strong man, and most are less empathetic than many are willing to believe.
When it rises to a high degree, and when all the traits are present, treat it as a serious red flag. Otherwise, you just have to go on your gut.
I took one on at one time. She clearly ticked all of the marks mentioned in the article at one point or another, and very quickly. I kinda sorta figured out very quickly that she had a screw loose, but she was sexy, thin and actually drove for 8 hours just to fuck me 20+ times over a weekend, so I figured I’d ride it out. Nothing was off limits and she liked things really rough and degrading. She also spilled a sad, sad history that couldn’t have been possible in breadth and depth unless she was like 70 years old, and many times she contradicted herself blatantly. Wasn’t too bright, but she was hot. After the end of the weekend she literally told me that she loved me. Dufuq?!? Girl didn’t even know my last name (and she never asked) I played it off with “whoa whoa whoa…too fast…I just got out of a very distressing relationship and can’t deal with love right now, please back off, give me space ‘to heal’ ” and then dropped contact. She tried to re-initiate a few weeks later and failing that, took up with another man, thankfully.
The dude she went to after me, told me later, unwittingly of course, that he basically got hit with all of the bad shit she had in store for the first man to fall for her spiel. He ended up dumping her hard. Said she even stalked him, heh.
First and last time. The things she pulled on him were pretty devious, I suspect he was the target of revenge for her stint with me not panning out. Shoot, I didn’t ask her to drive and meet me like she did, but I figured eh, I could use a fucktoy for the weekend so I went with the flow.
Amazing sex. Just amazing. Girl brought her own paddle for ass spanking, four “fantasy role play” outfits (business woman, Catholic school girl, etc) and was really into a whole mess of things and she didn’t care who saw her do it. Total sexbot.
I’ve seen a few men feel victim to these kind of women.The funny thing is that all these men have one thing in common: they are narcissistic themselves,have an illusion of grandeur. Most of the times,these women don’t intrinsically go for alpha,if the alpha guy is self-sufficient and has a good head on his shoulders.My beta friend,who is no stranger to crying and pleading attracted one of these women,because he is this weird mixture of that insecure dude that tries too hard and genuinely thinks he is the greatest and the funniest and the most handsome.He never mans up nor takes responsibility,but at the same time has this over-the -top confident persona that craves adoration.The girl in question was a nurse,shy,subservient and submissive nymphomaniac,fooled even me,I thought of her as a “great catch” ;until two months later when she threw a fit,smashed his living room and took his money out of the drawer.Red flags: quiet,obedient,likely into BDSM,needy and clingy just a tad bit too much. Long vetting is probably the safest bet,because for months at time they just seem feminine.
They have a skill for finding men with alot of confidence but some emotional wounds that make them vulnerable to manipulation. Narcissistic women can sniff them out. I had a 6 month entanglement with one in college. When I treated her well she got uncomfortable and when I dumped her, ignored her and banged other girls she was stalking me and claiming I was her soulmate. Push and pull. Im not a narcissist so I didn’t take advantage of her vulnerability but a guy could really make her his slave if he is sadistic enough. She literally throws herself at men constantly.
You need to be a Dark Triad man to own that kind of woman
Yes … and these are the types of men that these women deserve.
Really need to get our Hoe-Fax in order.
Good article Matt.
And I can say much for accuracy: I was once married to one of these women.
Sooner slam my dick in a door before doing that again.
Amen, Brother Jeep, testify!
Amen.
I wasted 3 years of my life in a long term relationship with one of these women. I was young, naive, and my life was a complete mess at that time….and I somehow ended as the formal boyfriend of such subject.
When I broke with her, she spent the following 2 years stalking me. I have to relocate because of work and she relocate as well to continue the stalking. I tried everything to stop the stalking: talking rationally, talking non rationally, sending her x rated photos of me with other women, legal measures, etc. She eventually stopped the stalking, I think she found some poor bastard to do the same again….
Now I know better, first death than another codependent girl.
My ex had a choice:
Stalk and harass me (and negate her victim status) while risking getting mistaken for an intruder and shot (the place I moved to was owned by a paranoid farmer with lots of guns)
Or
Go on mind drugs.
She chose the drugs.
They make her look 20 years older than she is.
I could say I hope she suffers, but she would like that.
Did you notice these red flags before or after you married her?
She had more red flags than a Mayday parade and like a good beta simp I ignored them all.
Ignored, or didn’t know they were flags until after the fact? It’s easy to fall into this kind of trap if you don’t *know* that they’re red flags. I mean, hey, she loves sexy sex as much as I do and she’ll do anything I want in bed, plus she’s super sweet and submissive in public! To a young man with no experience to speak of, this sounds more like a dream come true than a set of red flags (when combined with other factors).
Someone needs to teach these things to the youngsters (probably from age 10 or so).
A good father.
Sometimes good fathers don’t know these things (because of all the BS indoctrination), someone needs to teach them, too.
I would say that the majority of father have no real clue.
They won’t listen or understand. It only comes from experience.
Then they aren’t good fathers.
One never knows until after the shit hit the fan.
Sometimes its not even being beta, rather its related to relationships you had growing up, where you expected to be abused, or such things. Those are the really hard things to change, when they are that deeply seated. Many of the richest men had narcissistic mother who always criticized them..which is why they can never get enough money or love. Warren Buffett is a good example of this.
I’d rather slam my dick in a door than marry a feminist too.
This isn’t just a woman thing, but explains much about the “victim mentality” in general. Good topic and better timing. Been observing a lot of this lately.
Jesus. By the time we label all the dysfunctions of the standard-issue western woman, there will be nothing left we’ll be able to call normal.
Now, are we here to improve game and smash more pussy, or are we looking for “relationships” with women, who all seem to be damaged to some degree. I am in the former camp and consequently limit my exposure to and damage from such women as the inverted-narcissist.
As long as a man understands that no westernized mentally questionable pussy is worth an inve
Wow, my last girlfriend satisfied many of the points here. She was very empathetic, though.
Was it real empathy or just a ‘technique’?
I honestly think she really cared.
Okay, so that disqualifies her from being a true shitbag. Just some hurt chick looking for someone to be nice to her.
Yes. She was grown on a household that did not care about her.
Sometimes if one can get a girl like that far enough away from them for long enough, she can end up being more than worth the effort.
It is very to difficult to find a woman who does not possess any narcissism. The days when a man could expect his special lady to cook him a nice good meal when he got home after a hard day at work, are no longer a reality for the vast majority of men. Instead, the only offer men will get in return for keeping a woman in his life, is the horrific shrieking of an insane and delusional woman, who only thinks about herself and what better way to convey all of that than in the form of social media. A woman need’s her smartphone the same way a human needs oxygen.
It is got to the point where any man who has any self respect and integrity left, must now carefully vet what kind of companion he must have in order to fulfill his happiness. Good luck trying to find that since the default option that most will find include the following characteristics- tattoos, no respect for a man or his parents, only focuses on her career, needs a man to look after her kids (aka the beta provider she craves for) and so on and so forth. Ever checked their dating profiles and the kind of statements they make? “Looking to settle down after having all my ‘fun’ “, “A friend put me onto this” “a man who can make me laugh” etc. Yeah, because it’s all about you in the long run? Whatever happened to the days where women were loyal and compassionate to her man?
Unfortunately, the modern dating environment and the kind of women on offer has become tso atrocious and declining in standards, that the prospects of a man finding a suitable companion to settle down with, has reduced that every man must now learn to reevaluate his options. The statistics don’t lie- the divorce rates are now beyond 50% and more women are now receiving the better end of the stick when it comes divorce settlements are getting jobs over their male counterparts. If any of these outcomes do not boost the narcissistic egos of the modern day women, then I don’t what else does. But keep in mind, that with what we are witnessing with today’s modern day women and their delusions of grandeur, it all comes with ultimate price to pay. Women are continuing to scream “where have all the good men gone” while more men are simply abandoning the social conventions and wisdoms of life since society has abandoned them.
Well done feminism. Well done.
This society has ruined all American women.
I would like to tell you that it is very difficult to meet a man who is a gentelman. When I read comments on this site I wonder what all those men expect from women if they are not better. More than that lot of men are angry and hate women. They will never meet a good woman (lady). Or even if they will meet one they will not able to hold her, because they don’t know what to do with a lady. Not all but a lot. According to what men write here all women are sluts. But who are all these men if most of articles are about dating apps, how to travel over the world in order to find sex or how to seduce young stupid girls? Do women travel over the world for sex?
They write how they date 3 girls every day and make sex with them. Ok if man is 20-27 y.o. I can understand it. But men who are almost 40 or more and some of them have children… No comments! What they can teach their children if they are too busy with hook ups ? Is it a worthy man’s behavior?They are persuaded they are very cool. Maybe they are. It is their choice.
Man’s conclusion: men who date a few women per day, fuck around, travel to Asia or other countries for sex, cheat on their gf, wives are not sluts. They are cool. But women are sluts. LOL ))
Seems some readers worship Roosh and Co what is ridiculous and i can’t understand how a mature person can even take their articles seriously, more than that ask for an advices.
If the main goal of life is just to fuck around than they are on the right way but from the other hand they are on the way in nowhere.
I understand if a person asks for an advice from successful man who is happy in relationship. But most of authors here are too far from it.
Every woman is somebody’s daughter. This is a man’s world. Men want women follow them. As a woman I would like to say that I follow a man with pleasure. But lot of men don’t want to make any efforts. To follow a man doesn’t mean to be his slave. In order to understand it man should have a high order of intelligence, respect women and to be ready not only to take but also to give. If woman refuses in sex , tells what she needs then she is a demanding bitch. If woman gives sex very fast- she is a slut. What do you want dear men?
If men want women follow them why not to act right and make actions in order women could trust, calm down. All will be happy. For lot of western men a big problem is even to pay for woman in the reastaurant, i don’t say about other care tokens. Thus men should not complain that western women are sluts or something like that. If there are sluts – thise is your work dear men. Work of parents.
If a man doesn’t know how to treat a woman this is mistake of his parents. Mather didn’t teach or father didnt treat his wife well. If woman is a slut – this is also mistake of both parents. Circle.
I asked one young man on this forum what he can offer to woman. His answer made me laugh. He said he can offer a hot dick and it is enough. Obviously this man doesn’t date worthy women. Maybe he thinks he is only one man in the world who has a dick and he is proud of it. LOL.
There are a lot of confused men on this site. I think a lot of them have been played by women. Or are just scared of women. They are trying to decode women’s thoughts and behaviour. This is an impossible endeavour because there is no ‘one size fits all’ solution. Every woman is different, just like every man is different.
Some of us are lucky in that we have found a partner who balances us perfectly. There is no battle for dominance of both parties know their roles and have each other’s back.
There will be no peace until this ‘us vs them’ mentality is eradicated.
Hi there. I guess you are a woman.
I agree with your comment.
I think also there are lot of men here who were played by women. This is life. Doesn’t mean all women in the world are bad. In fact that mostly men play with women but women still trust in love and don’t hate men.
We are humans. I am persuaded we should give love, kindness and never give up.
I am a woman?
I wouldn’t say mostly men play with women. I would say a 50:50 ratio is more realistic. I have seen examples of women who are out of this world. There is one lady in my acquaintance who loves abusive men. Can’t seem to help herself. The more sadistic the guy is, the closer she cleaves to him. The good guys? She has nothing but contempt for them.
There are also some real arseholes as well. One guy dropped his lady like a hot rock, took their baby and dissapeared for 16 years. All because she had to go and visit her dad in ICU for a week.
So are you man or woman?
I like your point of view.
I agree that there are crazy women also. This world is not perfect. I wanted to say that if even somebody offends us we should not become aggressive or hate the whole world. We should be strong enough.
If you are kind ,good , positive person bad people will not stay in your life.
I had problems with men in my past, I cried because of man’s betrayal etc. But it doesn’t mean I hate all men. I adore men. I respect men. Bastards who offended me are not in my life anymore and as I see anything has changed in their lifes or changed for worse.
In my life present people who love me, whom I love , who support me and will not betray. For all bad things we do we get payback .
I am a guy but my other half also uses this disqus profile. Good on you. Don’t let bad experiences ruin your outlook and rot your brain. Life is too short to be spent bitching about anyone who doesn’t share your pov
Thank you. According to what you write you are a good and kind person. Nobody is perfect but at least we can improve ouselves. Happiness to you ))))
Spot on, but reader beware, it is true that a lot of genuinely feminine submissive women will seem similar if you aren’t experienced, don’t mix up the two.
This is a good point. I have had both and while the difference is clear from a bit of distance they can be a lot alike in the beginning and close up.
But in my experience the ones to avoid can never keep their shit together for long, so if you don’t rush things they will foul up soon enough.
I think best test is just ignore her for a while and then deny her something she asks the next time you speak. Right off the bat. A genuinely submissive girl will either not ask for anything, brush aside the denial or at max be a bit dejected.
The invers narcissistic will blow up one way or the other. Either suicidal or massive rage…
What’s with that whole drunk suicidal garbage routine they do?
Shifting the focus and trying to get you to go “Nooo, don’t kill your self” and to try to make it better. It’s all about attention and focus.
They do the same if you confront them about stupid behavior etc.
“In some cases, they don’t even need or want foreplay: they’ll just get naked and sit on your cock”
And sometimes the cock need not even be hard. This happened to me a few times – it was weird; I might has well been passed out.
You were raped.
Nothing I’d find too weird in and of itself, though. Sexuality can be expressed in more ways than just through penetration.
Good pointers.
Also:
“she craves psychological (and in many cases, physical) abuse”
Over half the females I’ve ever known.
I see a lot of women deliberately provoke their husbands into reactions then immediately default to victim mode. So fucking blatent too.
This is gold. No matter how mad you get. Get out of there ASAP.
Or, for the pros, you can flip it back.
Bill Burr has a great bit about the time his girlfriend (now wife) slugged him in the face. He calmly told her she needed to go to work now, and she couldn’t find a way to make herself a victim. Beautiful, and it made for a funny story.
Myself, I have made a successful flip once or twice. It really relies on making a girl feel bad for what she said or did to you, without giving her ammunition to flip it on you again. The inner strength required for this kind of psychic judo is far too strenuous (to me) for constant use, so I only do it when the attack is too painful to allow it to be used again.
After 12 years I flipped it back better than the best. I’m a black belt in mind fucking, but I will not have her shove me and put her chin in my face screaming “hit me mother fucker”. That’s not being a pro hanging in there, that’s being stupid and naive.
I have never let a woman hit me since I found the Red Pill. The verbal attacks, though, can only be handled a couple of ways.
When I can, I endure it, but when the attack really hits hard I have to judo it.
HAHA! Judo that ass! 🙂
(sarc)Reply: “If I do you will never look the same and I’ll dump your ass for being that ugly.”(/sarc)
He married a violent woman? Flipping heck.
I slapped a girl who threw a drink in my face for little reason. I dont think there was a more proper response. Women need to know when they cross that line.
But in only lasts for a couple days. Eventually she behaves the same and makes traps again.
I’ve had shirts ripped completely off, bitch dragging across the floor holding onto my shirt, trying to get out……
Yep.
And they are masters at it.
Lived like that for 2 years, getting my buttons pushed, then made to be the villain. It was a nightmare.
The stronger your frame the less their tests even move the needle.
“she craves psychological (and in many cases physical) abuse”
Describes just about any woman who dates a professional athlete. Nicole Simpson did things purposefully to enrage and provoke OJ, and he reacted so violently she called the cops 9 times. The 10th time she couldn’t get to the phone before OJ went overboard. But she clearly was addicted to this drama and abuse, and enjoyed causing it.
Fucking right she was. Just so happened he was genuinely nuts and it all went fuck up
Or he was just totally fed up with that crap and couldn’t take it any more.
Women are very aware of their surroundings. Places they can trap you for a physical battle. Bathrooms and walk-in closets are their favorite because it’s tough to get out. If you engage, they love it, it’s like an orgasm if you hit them, they get to be the victim. Stay calm, move her out of the way and get the fuck out.
Its getting to the point where it would just be easier to build a robot woman.
They are working on it
Citations:
http://www.breitbart.com/big-government/2015/09/16/sexbots-why-women-should-panic/
Here’s the dumb cunt from the start:
http://theantifeminist.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/01/kathleen-richardson.jpg
dude…really?
Yeah! And after the sexbots come out, then the MGTOW’s will be asking for a built in function where your hot sexbot wife cucks you!
Well heck, robot chicks of the future look like good, clean fun. Ask Ms. Cherry here.
http://image.tmdb.org/t/p/original/dVVdYGDtMIhFN30mIXVXmOEP0H0.jpg
Just watched back to the future 2 again yesterday. The 80’s were so optimistic about what 2015 would look like.
The expectation: HOverboards
the reality: big red telling us about mansplaining
It looks like the show is saccharine levels of “optimistic” but that was a pretty standard outlook at the time. Meaning, a bright, happy future full of new technological innovations and freedom.
They didn’t realize that Liberals would be in charge of government.
I honestly think you’re right, that sounds absolutely right. After destroying the Dems after their total fuck up with the 1960’s and 1970’s the thought seemed to me to be “Well, thank God that’s over, now let’s go and show how wonderful America is to the world!”
Look at the Hoverboards according to the movie vs the falltraps we have now.
On the other hand, I’m glad we don’t have flying cars. Between having to figure out where FHA’s jurisdiction ends and where the FAA’s jurisdiction begins, horrible driving habits, drunk drivers, people texting and driving, etc., it would be raining cars and body parts from the sky.
Who would have thunk that somebody was going to slam planes into buildings and alter the course of history.
Apparently somebody thought of it ahead of time, the entire Homeland Security bill was pre-written and sitting on a shelf collecting dust for quite a while.
I wonder how many other bills are out there like that and Obamacare, just waiting for the right time to propose.
Plenty of them. I don’t buy much into conspiracies, but it seems to make sense for totalitarian types to have a large stack of contingency type bills waiting to be made into law whenever the appropriate disaster strikes.
Cherry 2000, loved that movie. Especially when Les told that girl Miranda that she needed to work on her personality before he blew her brains across the desert.
That was the translated copy of the German Fatherland Gestapo Act of thirty-something (seriously).
Didn’t she have an electrical shortcut soon after?
Yeah. But for incels and betas the “don’t go near water” injunction seems pretty easy to follow.
It was an amazingly red pill movie, way before it was “called for”.
Dont forget; none of those con critters read the bills they vote for
But its assault rifles fault
Tongue in cheek, my friend.
how long until the sexbots come with cucking software?
Perhaps this will be a resource:
https://www.realdoll.com/
a Stepford wife
I got clued into these type of women at an early age when one of them destroyed my friend’s car and stole a bunch of his cash after he harshly dumped her. After she did that, we all wrote her off (same circle of friends), and it was a very bitter falling out. Then one night she called my (captain-save-a-hoe) other friend/roommate and told him she was going to kill herself if he didn’t meet her at Waffle House (it was 3AM). So, knowing how fucking crazy this chick was, my roommate, unbeknownst to me, met her at Waffle House for fear that she would off herself, then brought her back to our place and let her sleep in his bed. Needless to say, I nearly shat myself when I walked out my bedroom door the next morning and saw that crazy bitch cooking breakfast with a bright smile on her face like we were still friends. I literally jumped backwards when she greeted me and gave me a hug. I seriously thought she might be there to kill me, so I retreated back to my room, locked the door, and texted my roommate and told him to kick that crazy cunt out. Once she was finally gone, I gave him a harsh lecture, and she never entered our place again. Beware of these women. That sweet-looking smile becomes maniacal once you realize what they are.
Kill herself? Problem, problem solved.
“What separates an invert from a genuinely feminine woman is that the former doesn’t simply seek to submit to a strong man: she craves psychological (and in many cases, physical) abuse.” Exactly. One of the ways that normal pick-up game will attract you the crazies while you wonder where the unicorns are.
This sounds like BPD. Which is basically fucking crazy.
It’s BPD-lite. But, it’s like the difference between drinking a bowl of sewer water, or drinking a bowl of soup that only has one or two rat turds in it. Choose neither.
Hasn’t this become typical behavior for american females?
Not all of them, but the rest are being encouraged to join in…
Imo ALL women have a few of the listed traits in the article. How a woman seems means nothing when determining what kind of person she really is. For instance, some of the freakiest women I’ve ever encountered were initially met at church. On the other hand, some of the most promiscuous acting, shit-talking women have had very little sexual experience, or turned out to be virgins.
A woman who conducts herself how she THINKS we want her to, more often than not is just after something. The issue is, in this pro-vaginal society, they can act however they want, and still have a legion of simps ready and willing to treat her like a “queen”. And after chewing up and spitting out a few of those guys, a woman realizes that she has nothing to get the man she wants, besides PUSSY, ie the same shit that every other woman has.
Point is, women have to be TOLD how to be women, by us. And by us, I mean strong, logical men. Not pussywhipped “yes” men. If you think women can make decisions for themselves, look at how many bitches are delusional enough to think that copious amounts of make-up, dying their hair with colors normally found on a rainbow (or in a box of crayons), shaving half of their hair off, destroying their bodies with hideous tattoos, or getting enough piercings to resemble Pinhead from Hellraiser, is SEXY. Lemme repeat that. They have convinced themselves that this type of shit is SEXY to men. And its the emasculated “men” who enable them to think this way. We have to band together against them (both women and their perpetually thirsty betas) to restore ORDER to society.
Promiscuous women turned out to be virgins? That’s a darn interesting combo, dude.
Damn. Forgot the word “acting” after promiscuous. Thanks for catching my fuckup.
My pleasure!
I feel like the type of woman who is the stereotypical “false rape acuser” … as in… going out, getting drunk/high , fucking the first man to give them attention and then later feeling even worse about themselves
Thanks for the response Matt.
What about a woman who loves her husband with all her heart, does everything for him. Cooks, cleans, takes care of children… But she has a bad temper and is very jealous and can’t control it
Sam Vaknin is a sketchy character, to put it mildly. He’s not a mental health professional and “inverted narcissism” is not a term that means anything outside his circles.
I think it would have been better just to discuss BPD, since that appears to be what this article is really about.
I agree about Sam. The guy blocked me on Facebook after giving him a mildly critical feedback…
But codependency is, although seemingly not in the DSM, a rather universally acknowledged thing.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Codependency
See books like “No More Mr. Nice Guy” which is basically about codependent men. Only that submissive men aren’t sexy, heh.
Apparently, there is some disagreement about whether codependency is actually a disorder or simply an extreme form of a beneficial personality trait. Hardly surprising with all the “altruism” bullshit going around in our culture.
Everything he has said about narcissism is spot on though. I’ve watched many of his videos and he speaks the truth. BPD and NPD aren’t exactly the same, there are some major differences between the two which is why they complement each other so well (dysfunctionally well).
Covert and overt narcissist is the proper term in the psychiatric profession, instead of invert and extrovert used in the online community.
This sounds like my stupid bitch of a mother.
Forney is right. Inverted narcissist women belong to us Dark Triad men–we naturally enslave them and use them up. You neomasculine types need to keep looking for mythical unicorns and stay out of our end of the pool.
Just a mild version of a crazy bitch. Say what you will, but none of us who’ve had one can deny that these broads have some of the wildest pussy.
There is also a great article on Narcissism over at the Illimitable Men blog.
https://illimitablemen.com/2016/02/25/understanding-narcissism/
also on the nature of women…
https://illimitablemen.com/2015/06/30/the-nature-of-women/
in fact the whole blog has a heap of excellent articles worth reading and studying.
The real problem with inverted narcissists is that they’re so much fun in the sack…..
Gentlemen, I have found the motherload: http://www.stepfordwives.org/
Someone mentioned in a comment on my “Robot women” thread that we need Stepford Wives, well believe it or not they apparently exist!
Too complicated.
Coming up with these labels is no different than coming up with GBLTxyz and all that nonsense.
There’s simply crazy women and less crazy women. In fact all you need to do is work out how crazy one is on a scale of 3-10 and then act accordingly. As everyone knows, 1-3 on the crazy scale doesn’t exist…
Nice article.
I also recommend reading “Emotional Vampires,” the section about histrionics has a lot of info about most women.
BPD girls will MESS any guy up. It is really unbelievable unless you have lived it, the sex flows freely and endlessly, she swallows, begs for the d etc etc, then the games begin of withholding sex, affection, and soon you are wondering why you are still alive. Serious.
The only place for these inverts is in a tightly kept harem. No functioning man could retain only one of these loose spinning rocket engines. If a man takes only one solo invert along for his LTR ride, he’ll crash or get burned in the face. But if the invert girl is kept pegged into a rotating susan alongside an extrovert and a domestic diplomat, they all stay happily busy, the hamster dynamic and chemistry keeps the engine idling and stable but always warm and ready for dicko daddyo to jump onto an ass that’s saddled up. The ranch stays saddle ready.
Inverts exist for a reason, the same reason alphas exist which is the formation of a harem structure. A beta could expend every ounce of his time and energy trying to get his invert cupcake to hold her station and function at a basic level but the beta’s personal acomplishments are taxed of his time and energy and he achieves nothing more than getting the rag doll invert to stand straight once in a while.
Sam Vaknin invented the term narcissistic supply. He has alot of good videos on youtube. Surprisingly narcissists can be created by too much loving or too much criticism.
Been following Sams work for 6 years now. Check out his website and blog! His writting on why we love games is fantastic!
This is scary shit. And these types of women exist in non-trivial numbers. While there are certainly a couple of types of bad men to avoid (losers, weak unmasculine men, and those abusing drugs or alcohol) the vast number and type of female mental cases boggles the mind. It is almost unsafe to even date in America in 2016.
Holy shit that’s exactly my experience! I was friends with this girl, had a crush on her but she was with someone, so moved on, dated another girl for a few months and broke up with her cos it wasn’t working. Then this girl resurfaced, talked about how I was the only one who understands her and so on and how I am her best friend (yeah I was a beta then, never gonna make that mistake of making a girl your best friend), mind you she was still with her boyfriend yet she would hung out with me frequently. She ticked all the boxes, clingy, alcoholic, self hating, single mother childhood. I was alone after a break up so hung with her too.
Then one day she has a fight with her boyfriend, comes crying to me, telling me how she noticed I tell her she is beautiful and that she has feelings for me, she told me she loved me, as I was very beta then, I was feeling like a king! Finally the girl I liked is liking me back, then the very next day, I kid you not, she told me her bf apologized, it was a mistake to tell me about her feelings and she is going away from me. Imagine that, from feeling on top of the world to feeling like garbage, all within a 24 hour span, I think that was the last straw, I decided to just move on for good, then some months later, got to know about ROK from that mad max fury road controversy article, once I started reading the Articles around the site, it felt so relatable and feels like I have been missing something like this from my life, since then, a regular reader of the site and no more a beta male thank God.
Wow. That describes a relationship I just extracted myself from perfectly. One minute I’m walking on air, the next I’m an asshole. No middle ground in anything. Threw herself at me, threw her legs open, cummed instantly and often. Severe mommy issues and the stories she told, her mother was a classic narcissist. Always trying to help, never willing to accept help. No self esteem at all. Masochistic as fuck, the eternal victim. Jesus … that’s fucking eerie. Whelp. At least now I know what was broken in her head. Live and learn, I guess….
Narcissistic women are formerly abused self haters. This is their relationship blueprint;
-reel a guy in with love bombing, “you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, you have the biggest dick, I’ve never felt this way with another guy before, you’re amazing.” You’ll hear these compliments daily.
-Talks about her ex to the point of nausia. “He was such an asshole, you wouldn’t believe the things he did to me…” (All of her stories are lies), she’ll claim he beat the shit out of her ect. To see if she can manipulate a cage match between you and the other dude (probably a good dude).
-she’s extremely promiscuous, she’ll lay stiff as a board when you fuck her the first time acting like a virgin, “it’s been so long since I’ve had sex.” But she won’t ask you to use a condom.
-Play mind games- she will shower you with praise 24/7 then ignore your for a day or two or three to see how you’ll react. If you show the slightest bit of concern she’ll say, “God, you’re so sensitive.”
-they claim they hate drama yet there is more drama surrounding them than anyone you’ve ever known.
-they’ll flirt with their ex and when you question them they’ll say “you’re over analyzing .”
-they will intentionally say things to provoke you and if they’re able to get under your skin they’ll say, “you misunderstood me.” You can sort of see a gas lighting theme here. Their goal is to make you doubt yourself, slowly crushing you into a self doubting paranoid lunatic until they can finally say, “ha! Gotcha! You ARE crazy.”
-When you’ve had enough of the games and you dump them first, they will twist it around and make it look like they are the ones dumping you.
-She’ll mirror you; she will adopt all of your beliefs no matter how crazy they are, she’ll agree with everything you say. “No one understands me the way you do.”
-gas lighting; master manipulator with years of practice since her daddy left her when she was a little girl, they’re on a war path, when you call them out on their manipulation they will become filled with rage, angrier than you’ve ever seen them before since this is their primary objective.
-They have a crippling thirst for attention. You may feel like you’re filling a void for them and making them feel special and the two of you have a special connection. You will eventually realize anyone with a beating pulse can replace you. No one is ever good enough for a daddy issues narcissist.
-Jealousy games; Facebook bullshit with their ex’s, other guys, flirting with other guys, probably fucking them too. (They’ll claim they are the most faithful woman you’ll ever meet). They will tell the guys they ARENT fucking that you’re suspicious that she’s cheating on you with them in an attempt to make you look crazy and humiliate you.
-When the time comes, they will line up another dude and put him through the same cycle. Each cycle with an overlap at the beginning and the end. (Previous guy, current guy, next guy (love triangle)). Each has a critical role to keep this insane bitch afloat.
-They have a carefully assembled, well groomed team of enablers and white knights (of which they will openly hate until it comes time to take YOU down, they’ll believe her, not you, she’s already multiple steps ahead in her manipulation strategy, you have no idea what she’s already told them, anything you say at this point will be looked at as “see, see how crazy and paranoid he is, see what I mean?”
-Always late- she’ll agree to come over to your place but show up late, hoping you’ll chase her down with calls and texts and eventually make you go crazy.
-Crazy hot matrix on YouTube, this is the “bunny in the pot.”
Recap (This is a timeline),
Stage 1. Love bombing “you’re the best, biggest dick ect.” Ex boyfriend was a psycho, “he beat the shit out of me” (Hoping for cage match, she’ll probably introduce you to him). Mirroring “It’s like we’re the same person, we’re soul mates.” Agrees with everything you say.
Stage 2. Game playing- jealousy games, flirting with other guys and ex’s. Crazy making. Gaslighting. Will start bringing up things from the past that “you did.” Make you question yourself in hopes to erode your identity and lose confidence in yourself. You’ll still be getting unlimited face pounding, throat fucking, pig tail blowjobs in this stage.
Stage 3. Cheating in hopes of getting caught. Comes home late with no explanation but she’ll accuse you of cheating on her when you went to the hardware store in the middle of the day. Fights start getting physical hoping you’ll hit her back so she can pull the victim card. She’ll push all of your buttons she so strategically learned over the months or years. She wants you to hit her, she wants it so bad, it’s better than an orgasm for her to make you dance like a puppet and lose your fucking mind and she is crowned Queen Victim of domestic abuse. You can see all the attention she’s getting from every direction, friends family, you, work associates, everyone. If only dad stuck around.
Stage 4. The breakup. She’s got another guy lined up and guess who YOU are? You’re now the crazy ex who “beat the shit out of her.” (Even if you never laid a finger on her, it doesn’t matter, that one time you pushed her off you because she was ripping, scratching and clawing you counts as you beating the shit out of her). She’ll say SHE is the one who is breaking up with you even if it’s the other way around. She’ll try her best to devalue the relationship by saying something like, “I need to wrap this thing up.”
They’ll do their best to try to trick you into thinking they are confident and secure. Every day for them is like living in a house with a weak wooden floor built over a bottomless pit.
Oh my… Return of Kings, thank you so much once again. This is me and I had no idea.
great article, thank you!
Avoid marrying any western women. Or you can lose your house, your savings, everything through their scam-divorce.
very well written. but remember this is written by a malignant narcissist. so, take it with a pinch of salt.
everybody has some kind of feature of all imaginable diagnosis that exists in this World. there is no such thing as 100% normal or 100% victim or 100% correct.
as a rule: if the relationship doesn’t work for you, or if you don’t feel balanced or safe, you leave. period – – unapologetically
Codependents are destroyers. Everything good that they come into contact with turns to shit. They are also so completely delusional that they think their brilliant opinions and “suggestions” are absolutely essential to your survival. Once they have their claws in you it becomes a life and death struggle to get them to leave you alone.
I think there are too many generalizations going on. For the most part, the list is correct. However, we do have personalities and we do have empathy (although perhaps selective empathy).
One new piece of information that you shared was the idea that an inverted or co-dependent narcissist acts like a classic narcissist with a non-narcissist. This information helped with my total confusion. It is so true. That is exactly what happens. I am a classic with my husband and was an inverted with the “one.” The one is/was a classic. I don’t know if I will talk to him again. As an “invert,” I have no problem going no contact FOREVER with the classic who betrayed/left/injured me.
I disagree with No. 12 as well. I have no alcohol or drug issues. As far as No. 8, maybe that depends on cerebral or somatic. I can go a decade without.
I am a person. I have emotions. And I hurt deeply. My life is complex and I am complex, and yes, I play elaborate games on levels that other people can’t fathom. The classic narc (the one) shocked me when he left. But then, I did not know as much about narcissism at the time. Now I understand he goes through cycles of idealization and later discard before hoovering back. Fortunately, I became educated just before he started his hoovering back. He got the shock of his life, then, when he found that I’m like the dead people floating in the water after Titanic sunk …and they waited too long to go back to rescue them. You don’t get a response from a dead person floating in the ocean! Thanks again for your great article and great site. And, yes, I’m a female.
Hey! I know a man and when I first saw him I was like: he is perfect and he basically IS very attractive: alpha male, highly intelligent and every woman seems to love him. And he has a good side to him. But then a bad side but ill come back to this later. He is married to someone noone probably has ever seen and from what I have “felt” is that she is very very timid and he is always afraid of losing her. Yeah. Also i thought to myself: he must love her so much! He gives everything to her and their children (which is of course good). A perfect man i thought when i was still disillusioned. Eventually i realized that he gets all his energy from his job. He gets attention from women, he talks to audiences (thats his job) and yet he seems to bring all of it home to his wife. He also seems like he has lost the ground beneath his feet and only the company at work keeps him alive. Also he is very hard working(!). Yet on the other hand he kinda is unfair to some people. Like thinking he can do anything because he is attractive (like maybe a little arrogant). Yet overall I must assume he is a nice dude. I came to meet him as a student. And i don’t know but I kind of made him open up a little towards me. And I realized he was kind of just there and wanted to be seen by someone. Of course it doesnt mean his wife must be lacking something because keeping up in a relationship with such a man (who is also very visionary by nature) could probably be an uneasy “task”. But I was also thinking that she must give him probably not so much or rather demanding… also i had this feeling he wanted me to take care of his children. Also i kind of feel that he is a embarassed of his wife
. And he sometimes thinks himself as not attractive at all (like which would be the exact opposite to what you initially think of him and he makes you see him). i know this sounds much like speculation but on the other hand I feel like the description to his wife being an inverted narcissist could be fitting. He is like the melania trump in this relationship. Could there be a hint towards such a constellation in what I write here? Especially would I like to know if such women are drawn to these type of guys, very male, very independent and seemingly on the top of the food chain ;)) Thanks for an answer! 🙂
Dated one of these, “almost” married her. 5’2″, 105 lbs, blond, gray eyes. What a mind-fu*k… Yes I’m a narcissist. But her narcissistic power eventually eroded mine own. She told me the next guy proposed to her after 2.5 months dating… She said he wouldn’t tolerate her bitching… And she ‘fixed’ herself… Yeah don’t know about that.
Funny… You know why you met exactly a woman who is more narcissist than you are?
We attract same people as we are. Maybe it is a sign for you to think what you should change in your own personality. Maybe you should think about how many women you have offended with your narcissism and attitude?
Everything happens for some reason.
All alpha males are at least somewhat narcissistic if not extremely so. Not all narcissists are “always” alpha.
As far as offending women, why should I care? They can take it or leave it.
“As far as offending women, why should I care? They can take it or leave it.” – with such thoughts you should not complain. You met excatly same woman as you are.
Narcissism is not one of definition of alpha male. First of all it is kind of insecure.
Alpha males do not insult women because they are secure enough, more than to be alpha male means to do actions.
All people are more or less narcissictic but should be limits. If you offend other people, if you insult women do not complain that women treat you bad. You will meet exactly same women as you are or even worse. If you meet a good woman maybe you will be not able to see her nice sould and will be not able to hold her, then again you will get the bad one….
I don’t know you … It is your life, you live it as you like.
Wait wait wait… A male narcissist does not insult other people. He only cares about himself and people and things he personally cares about. I do not insult women, even when they bitch at me. I just laugh at it or flip it back around.
I only insult people if they get really aggressive with me. If a woman acts like a bitvh towards me, typically I just blow them off.
Ok, it is your life. If you like to take care only of yourself …. what can I say. Maybe you dont need anybody who could give you love, take care of you , to whom you could give love. Not your fault.
See once again you are mistaken. We care about people who are important to us. I cared about my introverted narcissist girlfriend more than I cared for myself. That’s why it failed.
You did it because she is more narcissist than you. LOL))))
If you care of other people maybe you are not too much narcissist… not hopeless :))) I am sure you will find another good girl 🙂
That’s the dilemma, is it because I actually loved her or because I loved myself that it hurt me when we broke up?
Hard thing to understand. I had strong feelings for her but she didn’t treat me as well as some other girls, but still I was highly drawn to her beauty and intellect. So I was good to her, even when she was a bitch to me.
When I should have just walked away.
Did you try to talk to her about your feeling and that she hurts you?
If she loved you, you would find a compromise.
If she did not love you, why to be with her?
If person is into you he/she will prioritize you.
Anyway it doesn’t mean that all women are bad.
Yes but the thing is, some women, especially these types mistake fear of abandonment as love. That’s exactly what happened. A narcissistic woman needs to feel fear of loss to feel like she is in love. Because only then can she love the other person more than she loves herself. If she loves herself more than the other person she will continue looking for a new person, that makes her feel like she is submissive. Because they are insecure they desire to lack on to a more secure overt narcissist/alpha male.
These things are inherent to behavior to some extent. The only difference being how bitchy the female is.
I disagree.What for to play games who is stronger.?
You speak as an offended person.
If two persons want to be togehter, if they really love each other they will try first of all to listen each other, try not to hurt each other, do all the best for each other.
In normal relationship partners dont play games who is submissive or who is stronger. Partners respect each other.
Woman and man a priori have different functions. Unfortunately now women become more masculine.I don’t understand for which rights fight western women if they have all rights, they can do whatever they want. They don’t allow men to be men. Thus men should not make too much efforts.
From another hand men in the west hate feminism but from what i saw lot of men act like feminists. Confusing…
But it is a long story..))
I see what you are saying and I agree… But that’s in an ideal world. Women in the west especially want to gain power. They want the situation to be what it is in their mind alone. They want someone but they also want what they want. It’s very difficult to deal with.
I don’t think you are narcissist too much ))
Wish you happiness and love with a good girl!!
We all want what we want.. men in the west also are very different … Seems like men want feminine women but they act sometimes like feminists ))) total mess :))
My poit is just to find the right person and to try to do the best 🙂
Definitely this is not the precise descriptions; a lot of statements are arguable. The true is that an inverted will never be interested in a Normal man, not narcissist. And narcissist seeks for an inverted. Thus normal man will be out of the interest of inverted.
She always has problems, but will gaslight you into thinking you’re the pathetic one, and only she knows what’s best for you. She will try to control what you eat, what you wear, what time you go to bed and even what expression you have on your face. She wants to MAKE you happy, whether you like it or not. It’s all about domination, under the guise of sickly sweet “good intentions,” because she could never win her daddy’s approval and has no self-esteem, so you’re going to provide all that by letting her plug into your life. If you’re wise you will see the mind fuckery. Don’t try to educate her on it, just leave.