There are only two needs that matter the most to men: the need to belong and the need for appreciation. This should come as no surprise. We are hardwired to be social and to naturally seek connections with others. This connection, however, because of the sheer premise of society comes to us without a struggle.
What happens is that we spend our teens and 20s naturally surrounded by others. School, work, family and other social groups all play their role. Our need to belong and feel appreciated is satisfied, at least to some extent, almost organically. We grow up in these social environments without being even slightly aware of the effect they have on us and the dependency they are imposing on our reality.
I lived the last two years of my life as a digital nomad. I didn’t work for anyone, I didn’t join any office or co-working space and I did most of my work from home. Needless to say that these have been the two most productive years of my life. I was constantly reading and absorbing new knowledge in order to refine my reality and I was constantly trying to find ways to optimize every aspect of my life.
I was becoming the übermensch that Nietzsche was preaching in his writings.
At the same time, however, I was going crazy. During these two years, I changed apartments almost 6 times. I lost many friends because most of them had to be brutally ghosted.
People from your past who don’t respect the new you and want to keep you there should be brutally ghosted.
You won’t regret it one bit.
— TheQuintessentialMan (@theQSLman) March 9, 2016
And finally, I struggled to make new friends because I was changing environments often and I couldn’t maintain rapport. While my personal growth soared, my social life slumped.
In 1889, at age 44, Nietzsche suffered a collapse and a complete loss of his mental faculties. He died one year later. Nietzsche wasn’t the most socially adept person. His aversion towards human nature led him to isolation. This isolation, in turn, led him to madness.
As I said before, we are not even slightly aware of the dependency social structures are imposing on our reality. You don’t really have to become a digital nomad to experience that. Most people, when they turn 30, realize that they have lost most of their friends, they struggle to meet new people and most of their relationships are empty and futile.
They experience a tremendous paradigm shift that they weren’t really prepared to handle.
The consequences of this shift are quite brutal. Most of them end up satisfying their need for belonging through toxic relationships they can’t escape from and their need for appreciation through an absurd addiction to social media where they try to expose their lavish, but in reality empty, lifestyles.
The need to belong
The need for humans to belong has always fascinated me. I remember when I was a kid I would go and watch a football game with my dad or my friends and I would feel extremely satisfied afterward.
Regardless of the result, I would really enjoy the fact that I could partake in such a collective event. I was appreciating the fact that a simple event like a football game would allow me to be around “my people” and experience such a rich spectrum of human emotions.
Later on and especially since I started being active on Twitter and different online forums, I saw how much of an impact Internet had in satisfying this incredibly strong need. I saw how thousands of people around the globe are craving to be part of a movement or a tribe and purposely creating what is commonly referred to in the psychology domain as in-group favoritism.
In-group favoritism or in-group bias is a psychological term that describes the tendency of group members to favor the ones that belong to their group over the ones that don’t. This works because we build our self-esteem through belonging, and the presence of someone from an in-group reminds us of that belonging.
I saw how people are exploiting this fundamental need and I also saw how the need to belong can spark revolutions and even lead to the most interesting presidential election the US has probably ever experienced.
Man is by nature a social animal; an individual who is unsocial naturally and not accidentally is either beneath our notice or more than human. Society is something that precedes the individual. Anyone who either cannot lead the common life or is so self-sufficient as not to need to, and therefore does not partake of society, is either a beast or a god.
Either a beast or a god…
Social exclusion and its consequences
The opposite of belonging is called social exclusion or ostracism. Ostracism (Greek: ὀστρακισμός, ostrakismos) was a procedure under the Athenian democracy in which any citizen could be expelled from the city-state of Athens for ten years. The name is derived from the ostraka, (singularostrakon , ὄστρακον), referring to the pottery shards that were used as voting tokens. Broken pottery, abundant and virtually free, served as a kind of scrap paper.
Back in 2007, a group of researchers from Florida and San Diego State University, published a study titled: “Thwarting the Need to Belong: Understanding the Interpersonal and Inner Effects of Social Exclusion.” This specific research coined three very interesting findings with regards to social exclusion:
1. Given the importance of social relationships for human survival, the social attachment system may have piggybacked onto the preexisting physical pain system (instead of creating a completely new neural architecture), using pain signals to alert people to the dangers of isolation and thus impel them to maintain social connections with each other in order to ensure survival.
2. Rejection led to a large decrease in intelligent thought, as measured by different IQ and reasoning tests. It was discovered that ostracism chiefly impaired complex, higher-order mental operations such as logical reasoning, more basic cognitive processing such as simple learning and memory tasks did not seem to be impaired.
3. Social exclusion can increase aggressive behavior. Rejected people even behaved aggressively toward neutral and innocent parties as well as toward large groups of people, emphasizing a potential link between rejection and mass violence. Indeed, an analysis of school shootings indicated that almost all adolescents who shot classmates had felt significantly excluded by them.
I can attest to all three of the findings and here is why:
1. The pain of rejection on a physical level is universally experienced and I guess that this is the major impediment when it comes to breaking up with a person.
2. When it comes to intelligence, the cognitive abilities of the individual and the motivation to pursue further intellect are strongly related to the motives imposed by his social environment.
3. In many cities well known for their effective urban planning strategies, it is purposely attempted to mingle people from different social classes in order to reduce criminality. When specific social groups are excluded from society, like it happens in Brazil for instance with the favelas, it is expected that in those cities criminality will soar.
The need for appreciation
A random google search for the term “why men cheat” reveals that the true reason behind men’s infidelity is emotional dissatisfaction, which in rough terms translates to lack of appreciation.
This need is strongly ingrained into the man’s psyche from a very young age. Not sure if this is a biological thing – the forager used to bring the food in the cave and he was appreciated for that – or if it is cultivated because of social conditioning and mother-son relationship – the man feels appreciated by his mother on an ongoing basis.
The point is that appreciation is a fact and is one of the primary forces behinds a man’s motivation to stay faithful and contribute to a relationship. Moreover, that need is not strictly confined to romantic relationships. The need for appreciation in the workplace, for instance, is today more prevalent than ever.
In an article titled “What Google learned from its quest to build the perfect team,” written by Charles Duhigg, it is explained that the ideal team is one that makes its people feel psychologically safe. That includes appreciation as well as sharing things that scare us without fear of recrimination.
Why do you think most millennials nowadays change work regularly and a pretty good percentage of them quit their job to either work as freelancers or start their own business? It’s not necessarily an ambition thing. It’s more like a combination of ambition and appreciation. When you are not appreciated in your work environment, there is no motivation for you to stay in that environment.
Unless you are that guy.
When you work for yourself, you envisage to obtain the appreciation you desperately crave for, either from your customers or from your potential employees. Personally, I was never a guy who wouldn’t want to stay committed to an honest, professional environment that makes me feel involved and appreciated. It’s just that those environments rarely exist.
In that respect, I would like to cite another interesting study titled “When inclusion costs and ostracism pays, ostracism still hurts.” Researchers van Beest and Williams conducted an experiment back in 2006 in which they had participants play a variant of the multi-player computer game Cyberball. The game is played in such a way that each throw cost the participant money. In other words, it was beneficial for participants to be excluded, since they would keep more of their money.
The subsequent statistical analysis revealed that the excluded subjects felt worse despite being rewarded with money. In contrast, subjects reported being much happier when included, even when that brought about a monetary loss.
In closing
The more you grow older, the more you exclude yourself from effective social environments and the more you forget to show appreciation towards people who deserve it. You unconsciously think that by interacting with people online and by staying in meh relationships you are fine.
No, you aren’t fine.
You have invested hours, days, months and years of your life in your personal growth. You know all the tricks required to optimize every aspect of your life. You most probably live in a city that offers you countless possibilities both in a personal and in a professional level. You are a man and you belong to a small group of people who know what this actually means. Act like it.
Read More: One Way To Defeat Your Social Anxiety
After college I took some time off for a break. In that time I found numerous red pill sites and podcasts which dramatically changed my point of view. Within six months most of my friends and/or family members could no longer relate with me on any level and I either ghosted them or they ghosted me.
From then to now I have suffered from social isolation and while I would not trade my red pill truths for anything, the lack of belonging has really gotten to me from time to time.
It’s even worse in the dating world and making new friends. Where once I was an evangelical Christian with a huge community I could go to at any time–now being a right wing non-believer with certain anarchist tendencies, my ability to connect with the average western woman has become almost non-existent.
Still using my mental metal detector in the hopes of finding an enlightened woman, whilst in the mean time banging dumb women with rainbow dyed hair and nose piercings.
I recommend you learn to almost entirely ignore religion in conversation. I’m a Christian, but it doesn’t really help me when talking with other Christians, either. When I basically gloss over the subject, though, I find I can connect rather deeply with Christians, Atheists, Hindus, Muslims, Agnostics…
Heck, it’s not like you believe in a God who punishes sin. You could lie about it, reconnect with your evangelical community, and seed your conversations with subversive thoughts that don’t directly relate to your godless ways. That’s what I have to do around college liberals, and it seems to work pretty well.
EDIT: Think of TRP as a religion, as well. Some famous bloke once said, “Preach at all times. When necessary, use words.” Living a better life will say more than your words ever could.
Oh hunny, don’t ostracize yourself (Equally don’t bang chicks with rainbow hair, they have probably got the HIV). The whole point of living the way you guys do is to be a ‘better self’ no? You don’t sound better…you sound a tad depressed. Enjoy life…tis short. 🙂
I’m not depressed. Since I’ve taken the red pill, I eat better, lift weights, juice, take supplements, read all sorts of good books, in many ways this is the best time of my life.That being said it could be better if had more like minded people in my circle.
Same goes for me. I am a 23 year old white german male and found the Redpill 13 month ago. Since then I blocked over a hundred ‘friends’ from facebook and deleted their phone number because they were just too much social justice warriors/too liberal to communicate with.
The fact that I am studying environmental engineering isn’t helping matters because this course is full of cultural marxists that rant about climate change and the socialist benefits for environment (they refer to countries like Bhutan or Bolivia – third world shitholes..).
I am now more alone than I have ever been. But I am not depressed, instead I am happy about the fact that I am wide awake and that I got so many opportunities.
Also since I found the redpill I stopped having sex. I just cant justify using my resources (time and money) for communicating with degenerated western women just for the purpose of having a chance of sticking my dick into a wet hole. I live in a small town that is filled with turks that came in the sixties and somalis and eritreans that came last year. Of course all of the muslim women are taboo and pussy worshipping sides like tinder and lovoo are flooded with so called refugees searching for sex therefore the german women are only using it for male attention. While online game is dead in general, it is deader than dead in this town. Of course because it is a small town Daygame is anything but common. Actually I have never seen a guy hitting on a woman in public. The only way to get a bang is social circle (which is pretty much dead for me now) and the numbers of clubs can be counted on the fingers of one hand. I don’t want to visit the same club every second night. Like I said: the benefits are way too small for the enormous effort.
I just keep working on my dreams, reading and writing novels, painting. lifting and having a good time when I take a walk through the mountains during rainy weather.
In early 2017 I will move to east asia for 2 month fucking the shit out of those beautiful women (yes, I have yellow fever) then I will come back, move to a big city and just keep working on my dreams.
Maybe I will emigrate because like we all know germany is turning into a caliphate and nobody will stand up against it.
You can call me a MGTOW with jungle fever.
I don’t mind.
IDGAF about those stupid labels.
Call me a xenophobe, a racist, a sexist, a misogynist, an antisemite, a MGTOW, a freak, a pervert.
Acta, non verba.
Hi dude
Instead of stop having sex why don’t you use some money to pay for it? In Germany it’s legal.
Also well done on following your dreams & passions. If I may ask where you going in east asia? I suggest Thailand or Philippines, many beautiful ladies who will make you very happy even in the sense of starting a real relationship.
Good luck 🙂
Why I don’t go to a brothel is easily explained: there is a brothel in my town and everytime I drive by at the flophouse I see somalis and eritreans sneak in there and I just think ‘Oh my god, I don’t want to stick my dick in a pussy that got filled with the cum of a thousand african migrants..’ (Yeah, I know they use condoms but it’s still disgusting.)
I will go to Bangkok or Da Nang. Probably Bangkok. I think Thailand is the best mix of cheap living costs, safety and openness.
How many times have you been to south east asia and which country is your favorite option?
When it comes to SE Asia, Thailand is pretty hard to beat.
Try the south? Still some traditional women down here. They will still shit test ya to see what kind of man they have in their presence but don’t they all.
I found southern women want you to be the man, northern women are too busy competing with ya. In general.
Still using my mental metal detector in the hopes of finding an
enlightened woman, whilst in the mean time banging dumb women with
rainbow dyed hair and nose piercings.
If that’s what you’re banging, then my guess is you’ll never find your woman. You can’t shake a whore tree and expect an angle to fall out of it.
Good point. Plus, that could poke your eye out!
I’m of the opinion that the only way to meet, or even have a slight chance of meeting, a decent woman now is through social circles. That’s how I met my wife, way back in the 1980’s. I’m not saying that the rules are the same, they aren’t, but I know that hitting bars and clubs and even churches (these days, excluding Orthodox) is just basically shaking that ol’ whore tree.
The question is: has ever worked, in the past, meeting (decent) women in clubs?
Yes but I think you still missed my point… the angles. No one wants angles flying at their face. Very dangerous stuff.
I agree with you. I am working the local stores that I go to, getting to know the women that work there and learning just what they are made of before asking them out!
This has dual benefits as they get to know you, find out you’re not just a pretty face and get comfortable with you. “Comfort” as we know, is very important to women.
Angles are the key method of taking down your enemy. Work the angles by making triangular steps (rather than lateral movement) to confuse your foe and simultaneously strike from angles he cannot anticipate.
And remember “Don’t think….”
Whatevs Bruce.
My strategy was to use Catholic/Orthodox sites and screen only for women who answered “yes” to the profile questions about whether you agree with the church bans on contraception and premarital sex.
Worked for me.
Then you end up marrying a women who give you sex once a month & that’s if your lucky. Still not a good choice because I rather be single & fuck a lot of bitches, since nowadays having a good women don’t make sense at all.
Keep on telling yourself that. What your talking about is your reality and its what happens if you never learn yo use it right.
Mines got off so hard that she loses count and thrashes uncontrollably. Care to guess how often I get told no?
And see where I’m going with this?
Why look to a woman for anything other than sex? She will never fulfill a male better than he can do for himself.
<<xk. ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★::::::!ir302m:….,…..
Well, it’s pretty hard to have children all by yourself. And women are way better at small children than I ever want to be.
i was going to point out mr ghost’s mis-spelled faux pas too, but you beat me to it……..a falling angle could crease one’ skull
Angles are literally Hitler
What I meant was, while I am searching for a good woman I am not going to remain celibate.
What makes you idiots think you deserve a wholesome woman after youve been a whore yourself? If shes got a brain in her head, she’ll run from your diseased ass.
That’s a valid question. Answer–I don’t believe I deserve anything. I was born into this world kicking and screaming and I am owed and deserve nothing. There was an article related to this topic a few weeks ago on ROK. It’s conclusion was that a man who slept around too much could lose his ability to form long-term relationships–I don’t want that to be me–it’s not the same topic, but I think it’s related.
The truth is, the woman will ultimately decide if I or any other man is worthy of her, so it’s not for me to say. But, if a truly virtuous woman were to exist, let’s take a virgin evangelical Christian as an example, she might, and rightly so, reject a man that has lived a promiscuous life . That makes me think twice about whoring myself out, which as of this time I do not do. I am pretty new to this whole “game” thing and since I’ve joined this circle of men I’ve had one partner, my current girlfriend. I don’t want diseases anymore than any sane person and as such I am selective on who I sleep with and practice safe sex.
LOL. If she’s got a brain in her head? Hamsters have brains, but they don’t build shit and rule over the earth. Neither do women.
This is a MAN’s world! James Brown said so. That dude made his own success and fortune — something a woman is incapable of doing.
Wholesome? What’s that? Wholesome is a word used to describe Vitamin D enriched milk Milk is wholesome, if you buy into ad man bullshit. Women are not wholesome. Shit, even little girls before they even acquire language skills are manipulating others around them, especially their mothers, to get what they want — another cookie, that toy in the store, or more TV time. Is that “wholesome”.
There’s no such thing when it comes to females. As far as what a man deserves, well, we are meritocrious beings. We deserve whatever we work for. So if a man, I mean, and idiot as you say, works for a so-cal led wholesome woman and gets her to spread her legs him, then he wins! He deserves that for which he worked for.
However, unless he finds a virginal unicorn, pure and chaste with strong moral character in his youth, he’s fucked. There are not wholesome women by the age of majority anymore. They’re pretty much all opened packages with signs of spoilage already.
At first I thought you were making a deeply philosophical metaphor that was well beyond my intellectual capacity for rational thought. And then I realised you meant “angel”.
First thing I thought about that when I’ve read it, that he will probably get a false rape accusation from that dyed-hair-bitch.
Never stick your dick in crazy.
The strong is strongest when he is alone said Nietzsche.
Re read your Thus Spoke Zarathustra:
Flee, my friend, into your solitude! I see you dazed by the noise of the g reat men and stung by the stings of the little.
Wood and cliff know worthily how to keep silent with you. Be once more like the tree that you love, the broad-branching one: silent and listening it hangs over the sea.
Where solitude ends, there begins the market place; and where the
market place begins, there begins too the noise of the great actors and the buzzing of poisonous flies.
In the world even the best things are still worthless without the one person who first performs them: the people call these great men performers.
The people little understand what is great, that is: the creator. But they have a sense for all performers and actors of great things.
(…)
I have that book in my library and have read it many times, but not in well over a decade. It is about time to dust it off methinks.
Not only him, his best interpreter is Anthony M. Ludovici, try this two:
http://www.anthonymludovici.com/mw_int.htm
http://www.anthonymludovici.com/nlw_pre.htm
If you have philosophy background, “Who is to Be the Master…” is the correct choice, if you read Nietzsche for pure enjoyment, try “Nietzsche His Life…”. They both talk about the same concepts but “Nietzsche His Life…” is more mainstream friendly.
There are pdf’s and epub’s of both.
I will totally add that to my backlog of books to read. I think those are great words. Thanks for the suggestion.
When I first found the manosphere and the red pill I was in Columbus, Ohio and it was a tough time. I had a few friends but none knew what I was going through and I was in the anger phase so I was alone much of the time.
It was the most beneficial time of my life though. I lifted weights, read books, learned game, learned to cook and eat right. Now I’m in Chicago spinning plates and enjoying life. You might need a change of scenery. Go to meetup.com and find some groups.
Become a reactionary. Every woman adores a fascist.
That’s where you’re right, kiddo.
I used to be a christian too. I actually tried celibacy for 5 yrs. Not something I’d recommend for any man. After 5 yrs I couldn’t take it any longer and decided to become a full on hedonist.
Being a natural introvert I have out grouped myself from many social circles all throughout my life. This allowed me to dedicate my time to mastering several skill sets which eventually paid off with the confidence it gave me and also job opportunities.
While I do enjoy my alone time. I make sure to be social on a regular basis. Complete isolation should only be for certain periods of time where one can dedicate all their efforts to achieving specific goals.
For introverts I wrote an article about their natural strengths here:
http://thesavagelifestyle.com/dark-power-introvert/
Also Corey Savage offered this link to a Quintus Curtius podcast in which he speaks about how introverts are natural warriors. Great podcast btw.
https://qcurtius.com/2016/02/24/coping-with-extreme-adversity/
Personally I still see myself as an outsider looking in when it comes to most social situations. As this article states isolation can turn you into a beast or a god. I tend to have a natural disgust towards those who need constant ego validation be it socially or otherwise.
Beasts or gods…..remember that because it’s powerful.
Bullshit. Beast AND god. If god is everything, god is also beast.
Read my comment below. Basically saying the same thing.
“while I was searching but not finding… I found one upright man among a thousand, but not one upright woman among them all”
___Solomon The Wise, Ecclesiastes 7:28 (NIV)
Sorry for your experience, but, red pill thinking by definition is to see reality from a perspective not shared by 99% of Americans. I, too, experience isolation in my daily life. As an added bonus, I dont feel safe opening up my mind to anyone other than serious friends, the witch-hunting has become insane.
My suggestion: use isolation as a source of pride and gain strength from being an independant man in a sea of dependant adolescents posing as adults.
Maybe I’m being optimistic but I think more and more young women are waking up. Because we are seeing how bitter and unhappy our older peers are, that the “you can have it all” BS they bought into doesn’t work. That hating men will not end well. Maybe buy a bunch of The Myth of Male Power or Why Men Are the Way They Are books and start leaving around yoga studios? In no way am I perfect, I’m still working on “deprogramming” the Disney… but my husband and I can at least laugh about everything. And, perhaps most importantly, I’m confident in his ability to lead. I think, to find the right woman, you have to be the right man to keep her. I hate to say it, but guys probably need to figure their stuff out first, so when you come across a woman is (almost) ready to let you lead, you can be her rock so she can relax and fine tune herself. My husband says, look for a woman where no topic is off the table, who can hear and give due consideration to your perspective.
Can totally relate. Am somewhat ostracized within my own extended family ever since I became cultural libertarian. Family all liberals.
Libertarian….another term for a stingy leftist.
Wrong.
They are fiscally conservative socially liberal. What am i missing here?
A lot.
First, that’s a generic definition.
Second, not giving a shit if your neighbor is gay doesn’t mean that you’re a Leftist, it means you don’t give a shit what they are as long as they aren’t hurting you.
Third, I haven’t found many Leftists in favor of me owning machine guns, silencers and F-16’s.
Fourth, I’m all about States rights and a highly weakened Federal government which you will NEVER hear a Leftist advocate for.
Fifth I’m against globalism and the U.N., find a leftist who hates the U.N. or is against Globalism if it means we have a one world government.
Sixth, being against the War on Drugs is a rational position if you read the actual Constitution. The 10th overrides all Federal attempts to claim powers that were not specifically assigned to it by the Constitution.
I can go on, if you’d like…
Do….I like it so far.
Do you believe in open borders and the NAP?
No. There is nothing libertarian about allowing your nation to be invaded and fall to another or many others.
To be fair, that is a “libertarian” thing right now, but it’s wrong. It’s the only thing that I disagree with the main movement on. And so do many others.
Being open to reason is a trait of many in the libertarian camp. Believe it or not.
Clue me in on NAP, I’m tired and drinking, and trying to talk to my son, apologies, heh.
You don’t approve of gay marriage I hope and Libertarians tend to have a more individualistic way of viewing things instead of a balanced individual/collective ideology. I was a huge Ron Paul guy….not that it matters but I love the guy. Stefan as well.
I don’t approve of government having any say in marriage whatsoever. That is the domain of the Church. I don’t have an issue with civil contract law covering specific situations, but that’s nothing to do with marriage.
The States and the Fed have usurped many powers not granted to them. I find this wrong.
No warrantless searches, period.
You have the right to conduct your business as you see fit, even if it offends, oh let’s say, gays (or anybody else)
The income tax is wholly against the Constitution to the point that even an amendment justifying it is wrong. It is anti-ethical to the Enlightenment ideals we have in our founding.
Launching first strikes of war is wrong, but crushing your enemy in war is right and just.
One of my best friends is libertarian and I always call him a stingy leftist. All in good humor.
I’ve been called that, and also a right winger who likes drugs (never did an illicit drug in my life, that comes from P.J. O’Rourke).
I live in Michigan and I’m about to start growing “medicinal” marijuana for extra income. All the dudes I know here who are growing are making a minimum of 50 g’s a year. I hope the right keeps fighting it so I can keep profiting before the tobacco and pharmaceutical companies take over.
That’s a definition from a left-right framework. The left-right framework is invalid to a libertarian.
open borders is a discussion among libertarians. Some libertarians believe that they can get whatever piece of liberty in whatever order. Open borders is one of those thing I think has to happen near the end of achieving a world where people have their liberty. The reason is because before that it becomes very problematic. A welfare state and open borders is not compatible for instance. You can’t bring in people who don’t believe in liberty as well. So open borders are so far down the list I find it pointless to even consider the issue at this time. Part of the problems of the USA today is that the government decided it could immigrate the american ideals of liberty out of the population. It’s working as part of a greater program.
The NAP is very important. You cannot have liberty without it. If aggression is allowed then we are back to what we are facing now. Where people simply use government and the political process to enrich themselves or push their costs on to other people. Also the NAP allows for self defense. Another misconception people who come from a left-right framework have is that it does not.
I’ve listened to a number of arguments and I believe the federal income tax on wages is scam backed by common perception and simple violence. Even the amendment that supposedly allows for it wasn’t ratified correctly. But that’s neither here nor there because the tax law itself has been slowly manipulated over time to disguise the fact that wages are not income. (which is a discussion of legal definitions and tracing the changes through time) It’s a long involved discussion that older video tape era Larkin Rose stuff covers quite well but ultimately meaningless except as an intellectual exercise.
The moral of the story is the income tax is legal because they have the guns. Either pay or go to prison. It’s not the like jury is going to be able to comprehend the scam either so forget about convincing one even if a judge doesn’t shut down the argument before its ever heard.
Whitey Harrell
This is one for the bookmarks, I appreciate your broaching an often neglected subject. Should you wish to take it a step further an investigation into the social fallout of diversity would provide a whole new level of red-pilling. The short of it is that diversity+proximity even without ongoing issues between ethnic groups promotes anti-social tendancies and reduced feeling of belonging/community.
Good article. I think though that what people chiefly desire is both Truth and Love, which is along the lines of what you wrote.
I would have to disagree with the last part of the article. …..Quite frankly, most people don’t want your opinion or they would have asked for it. I owe people an olive branch; a hello – how you doing etc.. If I get any flack, lack of consideration; well- then they are just dead to me anyway.
I’m the same way, if I speak to someone and they fail to acknowledge it I may give them the benefit of the doubt once but, do it again and I’m through with them.
3. In many cities well known for their effective urban planning
strategies, it is purposely attempted to mingle people from different
social classes in order to reduce criminality.
Which fail fantastically.
We had that happen here, and the rich folk got together and posted armed guards to keep the apartment low rent trash from looting us. Worked a treat. Now that complex is rented to high end types, the lowlifes vacated.
So no, that kind of “urban planning” is stupid.
Yeah the idea that middle class success and values can rub off on abunch of welfare collecting crack ho’s or say muzzy refugees is perhaps one of the dumbest liberal contructs ever in urban planning..
Reminds me of “no child left behind”. Take the gifted students and the bum students, throw them all together and the gifted will lift up the bums….not.
I must say that your rendition of this is obviously bad. However, I did benefit from something like this. It was before the no child left behind shit as I am older than this. However, where I am from a lot of poor children who tested well were brought to better schools.
I am from a really, really shitty part of new York city but I was afforded the chance to go to a school that was more of a school and less of a prison (like the one I was zoned for) and was able to get ahead in ways that would have been unheard of for someone from my socio economic situation only 10 or 15 years prior to my going to school.
I guess my point is that the no child left behind concept is good if done right in my opinion. Problem is, when it is hijacked by idiots it becomes stupid.
Northern schools are usually run differently than rural southern schools due to court orders resulting from desegregation among other things. In counties with smaller populations all kids go to the same school regardless of their socio-economic positions(good thing). The problem is that kids who are advanced or are fast learners used to be grouped together and kids that were slower learners or just bums that didn’t care were generally grouped together. It was thought that by doing that that the advanced kids would bring the others up but, it just slows them down to the others level. In general anyway. I had a couple of kids in middle and high school when that started.
I should add that in larger communities in the south where it’s not practical to have one school for the county that kids are bused all over the place to keep the schools desegregated so(in general) you don’t have bad schools or good ones they are all about the same and a great deal of effort goes into making them all the “same”.
I didn’t know that but it makes sense. Here in NYC especially (because of the huge population plus incredibly small land mass) it is much different. You are set up to go to a school in your district. However, while there is this idea of the schools being all equally good it simply is not true. Schools, as you would expect, in higher income districts, pick the best teachers, get the most funding, have far fewer instances of violence and crime and, in general, are just better.
More than that there are several schools which are public, but set aside, like Bronx Science or Stuyvesant, as being schools with excellent education and reputation for producing future leaders and that isn’t even talking about parochial and private schools.
If I was born in my neighborhood (Bushwick New York) in the early 60’s instead of the early 70’s I would have gone to a fantastically terrible school which would have been both dangerous as well as underfunded and served by the worst teachers in town. However, born 10 years later and people were starting to say “hey, lets get that blue eyed kid with high test scores out of this shithole and put him in a school where he can learn something” and that kind of thinking made all the difference in the world.
That small difference changed my whole world.
In that sentence, the word “effective” should be in quotes.
I didn’t work my ass off to be forced to live around riff-raff and their problems. The problem is that people make the fallacy of composition and assume that because they know some very nice poor people, that all poor people are nice. I admit, it is nice to think this, but drive through a poor neighborhood and the picture is self evident – there may be nice, good people there, but there is also a fuck-ton of dysfunction that I want no part of.
The ultimate resolution is one of two options: either gentrification as you mention, or white (not actually just whites, more like upper class) flight.
In my experience most people who are “poor” and I mean really poor not just down on their luck are that way for a reason usually due to drugs and/or alcohol abuse or they are borderline sociopaths with a bad attitude and a chip on their shoulder who pretty much bring everybody around them down to their level.
Yes. It may be difficult to be rich, but it is not hard, in virtually all cases, to avoid poverty.
There is a point in what you say but the favela situation is not ideal either.
The need for appreciation is basically respect. Which is the most valuable thing a woman can give a man. Oh sure, we enjoy that little thing between your legs temporarily, but its price is low, and far more valuable to us is your respect.
Anyway, this article seems like common sense when you look at the title, but it’s very deep, and explains the obsession with social media, and how some can be driven to commit suicide when these psychological needs are not met.
I think that ROK should stop naming articles like “the X whatever that Y”
Nothing is free. Nothing should be free. Respect should be earned, even by a man from his wife. A man who expects free respect isn’t worthy of respect.
If she disrespects you then, I’m curious, how do you respond? Tell me.
I don’t expect a stranger to have respect for me, beyond common courtesy. But someone I am intimate with, yes. If they do not respect me, I do not respect them, and either pump or dump. If a woman doesn’t respect her husband, I find that rather despicable, and question why she married him in the first place. A wife owes a duty of respect to her husband, and the husband owes a duty of protection and provision to his wife.
No. If a wife disrespects her man then the man should withhold provisions from his wife. Once this has been accomplished, the wife might start showing some respect.
The picture you’re painting potentially represents a poor provider demanding respect when he doesn’t deserve it. That’s what I take issue with.
Its a chicken or the egg thing in the way you word it though. if the wife does her duty of respect that will motivate further a husband to continue his protection and provision and a husband naturally providing protection and provision for a woman he deems worthy will motivate respect from the wife. In the past the respect for men was a quality a woman was raised with and very likely she was given to a man to be a wife and hence the man was already identified by another man, her father, to be a good provider.
Now that women have so many choice and rights, of which they cannot keep track of nor manage, the reciprocity in the relationship has become cyclical. Deserving goes both ways now with the dilution of the quality of both men and women. One could argue that it starts with the woman’s respect, but that gets thrown out the window when you meet her limp noodle handshake spouse which she is happy to boss around. AS you can see it goes on and on with the current state of our society. Withholding provisions can become troublesome as another man will insert himself even if the wife isn’t seeking out a white knight.
Respect among men is probably the first thing that needs to be sown up. Because withholding makes sense, but it cant be effective in this day and age. A man needs go about his business and demand what he deserves and what is his right as the husband and if that doesn’t work, well, maybe he rushed in to making her his wife. A man should know his wife well enough to know how to deal with times of strife. A man should know all about who he is surrounding himself with and how to handle them should things go sideways. no?
No. I’m worried that you’re encouraging men to be complacent Betas.
A similar attitude I’ve seen on another matter is the concept that women should be submissive to her man. No. A man should be assertive.
If the man is assertive enough – as an Alpha is – then it won’t matter whether she’s willful because his assertiveness will smother her disobedience.
Telling women to be submissive is an invitation for men to lack assertiveness.
The problem with this advice – telling women to be submissive/respectful rather than telling men to be assertive/admirable – is it won’t help men and their relationships.
You’re failing to realize and accept that the man is the general. Like a general accepts responsibility for the actions of all the soldiers under his command, a man is also responsible for his wife’s behaviour. He must be the leader, the Alpha, the dominating male. If he cannot manipulate and force his wife into submission and earn her obedience and respect then he doesn’t deserve to keep her.
Why should it be otherwise? Why should weak men be allowed to keep women and breed?
Fuck them, I say. Fuck the weak. Fuck the Betas. I’ll laugh my socks off as their women walk all over them and then walk out on them.
Well, by submissive, one must have a dominating force causing or forcing it. However, I completely get your point. Telling women to submit in the broad sense can take away a valuable aspect of the relationship because the man isn’t asserting his dominance and even if he is, her volunteered submission without out PROPER assertion from the male can be a Trojan horse of sorts to where the man doesn’t know what to do if the woman becomes assertive one day and he never tamed her, he was just getting the byproduct of something trained into her by maybe her father or another man or society.
This puts into perspective the value of courtship and making a woman your own before marrying her.
Completely agree. It’s good you saw my point.
Respect among men is only possible when dueling is not illegal
I hate when people argue that we should respect people just because they are human. Fuck that noise. The fact that you can shit and breathe doesn’t mean a single dick in a big bag of dicks. I agree with you 100% here. We should be accorded the respect we have earned and that respect alone….by all other people, family included.
Right…women used to know this . Show or tell your man “he’s great” or that you appreciate his hard work and “viola” you get dams, canals and a man-on-the-moon ….
“The need to belong” lol maybe if you’re a gay millennial who needs to learn about masculinity from the internet because you grew up on macaroni and cheese and video games.
Many males are reclusive and anti-social. What fags on the internet call “the dark triad” describes a hardened, jaded psyche that no longer craves social contact like the raw, sensitive, emotional mind of a young child.
Thank you for your comment. Im glad your here, and i appreciate you.
This comment killed me. Well played.
Brilliant.
Your comment is laughable. Just because you are antisocial it doesn’t mean that you represent the quintessential masculine male. Masculinity is deeply associated with tribalism in many cultures.
FUCK ME DADDY!!!!
No seriously you said what I had in mind but even better than I could say it. There is NOTHING WRONG with being a lone wolf, an introvert, anti-social and whatever the fuck they say.
I mean come on, if you seriously still seek validation in this day and age why not go and become a SJW while you are at it?
I’m kinda fucked then being a divorced cripple. Almost 40. Hell I even have a house and two cars that are paid off. Its cool though. I stay busy. I was thinking of doing some community organizing. LOL!
lol.. almost 40.. your just getting into the years where gals drop their clothes by saying hello. Its prime years….. Its not 20 when gals are picking through the guys trying to figure out the best …. Now the tables have turned – they prove it to you.
This article. ..the writer is a needy little fuker. I really don’t care if the planet blows up;.
Yeah, I am gonna try to see if I can scare up any of the locals by seeing how patriotic they are. It’d be nice to meet new people by getting them to help me wave signs at traffic on the main highway leading to the bigger towns. I may just do an experiment with okcupid and POF. Not looking for relationships mind you. Online dating is a graveyard for me. I don’t lie. Disabled dating. that is a big LOL! pfft I just want to see who bites for patriotism. Its kinda hard to win these facetious bitches over 15 years after I broke my neck and back and almost ripped half my face off. I can walk, if just barely. Very humbling. I’m with you though. I could care less if we got hit by an asteroid or whatever. I just finished sanding and staining the floors here. So beautiful.
How long more you gotta stump up for the bitch?
This will blow your mind. I’m in conservative land. That is what makes what I say very suspect to most. These women here vote with the herd. I’m curious to see if there really are any conservative women that will have the ovaries to take my offer and run with it.
For men in a relationship and in general, appreciation seems very important, i concur.
So what about women? What do they crave the most? Endless validation to fill a bottomless void in their crazy lil souls or what?
Shoes……
I used to hate everyone. I was alone for years. It’s important to realize that you don’t want to be alone, you want to be away from those you share no interests with. Don’t force friendships. Realize that there are others out there like you. Find them, feel appreciated, grow together.
So true. I was the same way. Hated everyone as a youth. Now I realize that my time is valuable and I only wish to spare it around people who share my interests.
I was told constantly growing up that I couldn’t do or say certain things. Sometimes even entire social circles rallying against whatever upsetting thing I had done.
This only galvanized me all the more and I was fine aggressively plowing forward as a lone wolf. It wasn’t until I started my own blog that I saw so many others from around the world who connected on a deep level with my words.
Hell yeah. My exact thoughts. I’ve seen your blog around, I’m going to check out your work.
Just don’t get into the whole “misery loves company” routine where you might hang out with other miserable pricks…
Oh…but it does…;))
Poignant article and I agree on virtually every point. A man does have a need to be appreciated or respected.
However if he is offering nothing of perceived value then he needs to change himself before he should expect appreciation.
Your line about beasts or gods hit home with me.
That is a topic I go into deep exploration with on my own blog. My thought is that in this day and age, the civilized or modern man must reacquaint himself with his most primal and savage nature.
He does this in order to achieve mastery over himself. Thus becoming a god rising above the common morass of the barely cognizant masses.
A beast and also a god.
One of my favorite images is the old picture of man being pulled off the earth by an angel yanking at one arm and being pulled back by an ape holding the other. Truly this is the state of man, halfway, as they say, between the apes and the angels.
Kant understands this perfectly. We have our pure and practical sides….we are part god and part brute. For Kant, however, we have the freedom to chose which to indulge in more — at least to a degree…that degree depending on certain bits of facticity.
Essentially, Nietzsche, while fully understanding the world in front of him, had a hard time seeing the world behind him. He misunderstands a lot of Kant and never realizes that (especially in the Critique of Judgment) Kant winds up saying much the same as Nietzsche just translated for a more genteel time.
In a nutshell, to the degree that we can allow for an increase in the feeling of life, with “life” here defined as the constituent possibility for abstract thought…freedom, or as Kant calls it “spontaneity,” we are, essentially, gods. However, not to put too fine a point on it, and if I am allowed a little poetic license, eventually we need to shit which brings us back.
While you always have my full agreement that we need to reacquaint ourselves with the primal and savage nature within, I would argue that it also needs to be controlled by our better angels.
Too many men have forgotten how to be savage, or have fallen into savagery to the point where they are total beasts. Both of these are equally bad in my opinion. The truth is that as men we are constituted such that we are part angel and part ape and if we let ourselves become too much of one at the expense of the other than we lose the one thing we are truly meant to be — men.
I agree about the balance. What I’m aiming to do bring a balance back to modern males by injecting the savage spirit into them again.
I will let other men be the angels on their shoulders. I will bring war and glory, blood and bone.
I see that from your writing Savage. I have felt all your articles are drawing that savage nature out to meet a demand of a lopsided set of angels.
The problem is that everyone decided, at some point, to bring the angels and no one brought the blood and bone. It created a disparity that lead to a lot of faggots walking around faggoting it up. Someone needs to bring balance.
One thing that I always laughed about from, of all places, star wars was the idea that the jedi talked about destroying the sith to bring balance back to the force. This is all fucking wrong. You need them both in equal measures to bring balance. Now, there is a lot of faggotry, so it calls for a loot of war and glory. In the end, the result is responsible men being men.
I can’t imagine the utter banality of a world where there exists no enemies. A faggot world indeed.
ha!
Lack of a worthwhile enemy is what destroyed Sherlock Holmes. Killing Professor Moriarty, essentially, destroyed him from the inside as he had no true adversary left and was forced to put his exceptional skills to nonsense uses.
I always thought the Jedi were a bunch of whiney bitches…..
I am with you. Do you have any fucking idea how hard it is to run a galactic empire. The sith weren’t really evil until a rebellion threatened the incredible utopian society they created.
However, my point was more to the idea of “balance” to the force. The Jedi talk about balance as if balance means only the light side of the force without the dark side which is, literally, the very definition of being out of balance. The Jedi didn’t want balance. They wanted a lack of balance that favored them.
They killed all the plumbers in the Galaxy far far away…. oh Lucas explains……
LOL according to you clowns, feminists are the bitter enemy you’ve always wanted to fight. So far, tho, for forty years you’ve rolled over pretty nicely for them.
Speak for yourself butt plug boy. Feminists aren’t my enemy. Anyone who is a perpetual victim does not have the power to be anyone’s enemy.
They are just screeching banshees on their way out the evolutionary door lol.
Toodles bitch.
Yup. Its not a contradiction. Its a package. One isnt complete without the other. Hence I like the grey jedi in Star Wars the most. They commit neither to the dark nor to the bright side. Quite wise in my eyes.
Kant’s Critique of Pure Judgment is in my opinion his finest tract, especially with regard to developing one’s sensibility in relation to the Arts and Nature. It’s kind of like an echo chamber of the divine without God being referred to by any particular label or name- like shards of light reflected in the firmaments of our better thoughts and finer instincts- but devoid of any preachy “morality” that could impair our critical judgment. Thank God.
It is the need to belong that is exploited for control. It keeps people from speaking the truth. From going against the system of control. Social enforcement is by the large the most important thing to harness to farm humans. The concepts go back thousands of years and in the early 20th century moved to a scientific management of society.
It is so powerful to exploit because the people become their own guards. I am sure most here have experienced it. Express something that goes against the common programming and people step out of the woodwork to fling insults, to socially isolate the person who dares to speak facts or have opinions that go against the common belief system. The lesson is always if you don’t go with the herd you’ll be isolated. Being correct doesn’t matter. Being with the herd does. Very very few people will take the abuse and isolation so the result is a firm grip of control on society.
This is bollocks. Nietzsche became mentally ill and died due to disease, most likely cancer.
– Sarte
syphilis.
Apparently that was a smear by people who blamed him for the Nazis.
could have been. Maybe, maybe not. Symptoms were consistent though.
Also, the people who blamed him for the Nazis were morons, but so too were the Nazis who tried to shoe horn his philosophy into some kind of Nazi propaganda. I am fairly sure that the percentage of people who talk about Nietzsche who even kind of get him is close to 5. The percentage of white supremacists or nationalists (despite the nation) who quote him who understand anything is a hard 0.
That said, I have seen more compelling proof that he had syphilis and that his mental issues post 1891 were a result of it than I have seen to the contrary. Thomas Mann, no fan of the Nazis and a big fan of Nietzsche, believed in the syphilis story as well.
Of course, we can just debate forever about it and never come to a conclusion. I will say that I asked myself the question, thought about it a long time, looked at the evidence and have decided to believe the syph story.
Jung spread the story that he picked up Syphilis from visiting Brothels when he was a young man. Wagner, oddly suggested that he went mad through constant masturbation, although when he made that statement he had apparently converted to Catholicism!
Well there is a huge debate ongoing about it in the medical community. There was a paper in March 2008 that suggested a serious lack of evidence to support the syphilis hypothesis. But what he died from is largely irrelevant. My point was that he went mad as a result of a brain disease and not because he liked a few quite moments to himself.
Absolutely on that. To pin this on his lack of socialization is as crazy as Catholics pinning it on excessive wanking
Indeed although excessive wanking will make you go blind. Look what happened to Stevie Wonder.
The only people who understand a German philosopher are pretentious, pompous, pseudo intellectuals who learn about him by wasting their time majoring in philosophy at a Juniversity in Jew York city
Well you are an idiot
Your article is spot on; very timely for me. Thanks for posting.
Loneliness suppresses the immune system.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/behindtheheadlines/news/2015-11-24-loneliness-may-affect-the-immune-system/
Too much thinking also suppresses the immune system, which together with loneliness were most probably the cause for Nietzsche’s health issues.
On the other hand, for men with strong foundation and stellar health loneliness does not have a negative impact. Dick Proenneke spent decades in total isolation and reached an old age. But he was psychically active and did not sit on his bum all day dreaming about super men.
I always see the Nietzsche / Aristotle comparison about isolation versus socialization and it is such a bad comparison. The psychological needs of an Athenian in the 3rd century BCE can’t possibly be compared to the psychological needs of a German in the 19th century CE, much less those of an American (or other civilized western nation) in the 21st century.
Aristotle was dead to rights in the politics. However, he was dead to rights for a different people with a different mentality. Things have changed over the last few thousand years. The reason Nietzsche is so amazing is that his writing was actually more timely for our age, some 100+ years after his death, than for his own. While Aristotle did a very good job understanding the world around him, Nietzsche understood the undercurrent of the world and saw the world to come.
Exactly. When drawing from the old texts, one should be cautious…and see where the author stood during his/her life. Namely: context, context… ;)))
A lot of antique otaku out here… :)))
To be fair, it is super easy to forget. X says this and Y says that, they are opposed discuss, but like you said, without context it is simply a mental exercise which, while fun, is ultimately fruitless.
Mirabile dictu. 🙂
indeed. a rare occasion.
In this day and age it sure is popular to pit arguments of ideals and philosophy against each other with out context of time or of any kind really.. this is an excellent point, rarely made.
Hmm, to be point. However, I actually believe he got many insights wrong about basic human drives and ambitions. He idealized, for example the notion of “The Will” and it’s vibe and strength in the average man, which I’d imagine is quite tame and self centered in fulfilling its most basic drives.
His evaluation with regard to the sensibility of the average man to create “that which is greater than oneself” is overstated and misses the mark completely as the majority of people have (a) Little or no sensibility with regard to the artistic and philosophical values he thought were important (b) The majority of men, especially today wish to take the line of least resistance in the world or essentially the path that will led to maximum self fulfillment with the minimum of effort.
A brief look in the mirror…both Beast and god apply. 🙂 Yay! )))
Maybe you should take a good long look…..
So I did…longer then the longest of Your attention spans, anyway… that’s good, yes? :))
Yes, good…..
Sure, “Hero Hunter”…You got me…You got me so bad…. ;))))
Ubetchyerass!
I bet…and won. Sorry, Hunter. 🙂
Next time bet more of YOUR ass. It may pay out.
🙂
Bet what? Won what? Gud man….
Being a father will liquidate most self loathing. Maybe traditional life has it’s reasons. I would give up a nut if I never had to work in a office or ever again. When you realize just about everything is a lie purpose is not so meaningful anymore.
Being a father will liquidate most self loathing only to be replaced by the loathing of his son for his father less than 20 years later
Never understimate the hidden power on an introvert
The first two paragraphs in this article taught me more about life than all my family and teachers combined
Great article, maybe ostracism and exclusion throughout history caused the Jews to turn the way they are.
Got that backwards, they were welcomed into every culture until “the way they are” changed that. It is genetic
a need to belong, or as I have stated in years past, “men need to be needed”
so much truth. The times I’ve been needed before everything just got better.
Most happy men I know are 1) getting laid on a regular basis and 2) appreciated for what they do at work and in their personal life.
One time about a decade ago I had a dry spell of sex for about a month (just moved to a new city and was finding a social network). I was downright miserable toward the end of it and even thought about banging a fat chick I had met about a week ago.
Same goes for appreciation. I work hard and don’t beg for any type of attention. But I will tell you what makes me the most mad I have ever been, being hated on after doing a darn almost perfect job. My last job, I finished a six month long infrastructure project under budget and on time. You would have thought upper management would have given me a “great job” slap on the back. The very next day, after taking my first day off that year, I get an email telling me I should have been “in the saddle” that day because BS XYZ was happening (very little to do with me). I told the CEO to go fuck himself and quit. He then had to contract me on as an independent contractor to do the post-op on the project since no one else could figure it out. I made twice my salary doing a three month gig.
Nicely done. Fuck entitled bosses.
“Most people, when they turn 30, realize that they have lost most of their friends, they struggle to meet new people and most of their relationships are empty and futile.”
whoa
this article is fucking LEGIT! I’ll dial up these studies later tonight. So many unresolved things that I was in the process of finding answers to are being explained here.
Not sure I agree with this. I have always felt quite an aversion to belonging and loyalty and that kind of stuff. I dislike collective events and I dislike nationalism. Hm.
What about the need for roots in the organic sense? Like the appreciation for your own remote Czech lineage? You must feel that on occasions that you’re kind of a spectator or outsider to the Bavarian culture around you, as culturally and ethnically you’d have an affiliation with your Czech ancestry.
Kinda true. I dont think Id really fit in with the Czech folks, either. Its more the country I am attached to, I guess.
Well, Tom, the feeling of loyalty and belonging is a byproduct of just being a man amongst men. It ingrains the practices and tendencies of men and it further separates us from women. One example is that in a loaner lifestyle, not to say you act this way, what I’ve seen is than a man can revert to a female tendency of holding grudges, for instance. When participating in the occasional gathering of men, arguments and fights can take place and be forgotten all in the same night or hour even. The unspoken bond of being a man and as such not holding on to wrongs or petty slights, its also a form of toughening akin to training or “hardening” your fist by making practice of hitting a wall routinely.
While not necessary by any means its a tool and something than Can prove fruitful to your life and your personality.
Good point!
Opening ones self up to betrayal, which is what you might be avoiding with the aversion to loyalty and belonging, builds the strength of how you Trust.
Consequently, If Trust truly was something that had to be “earned” as some believe, then it is no longer Trust. Once someone has proven themselves to you, it now becomes positive expectation, then the downward spiral begins lol.
Interesting idea. Heard it before. Not my type of thing right now, but that might change.
Just keep it in mind for when you have gotten all you want to get out of what you are doing now. You aren’t growing if you aren’t uncomfortable, lol. Still reading through your site btw, great stuff.
Heh, thanks buddy. Of course, who knows how I will choose a year from now, considering that a year ago, I was a very different person from now.
So you never rent, always purchase in your life then?
This gathering of “men” you describe sounds like a tupperware party for fags, “petty” slights lead to duels to the death among real men of honor.
I miss self-love here. Aruably more fundamental and important.
This is why fight clubs are important. Men feel like they belong. Through all the battles and blood and the subsequent beers and brotherhood, men need to belong more than anything. Not to anything having to do with females but everything having to do with bonding with other males.
Without male bonding a man is lost.
I must disagree. The need to belong (conformity) is outdated bioogical imperative that is used against men in the modern age. The need for appreciation (external validation) is an immature trait, and not a part of the healthy psyche of an adult male. In my less than learned opinion, the two most important psychological needs are these: 1. Mastery, and 2. Self Control.
<<xk. ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★::::::!ir302m:….,….
This is bullshit. I know biologically you are correct but we aren’t exactly in an era where men can be men and everything is going to be alright. You see there is only so much hours in a day, you better spend them doing what YOU want and that better include self improvement in some ways too.
The need to belong is bullshit extrovert keep on trying to put down the throats of introverts. There is nothing wrong with being an introvert and caring about yourself first and foremost, remember that giving powers to others is never a good thing.
Live in reality, don’t live in the past ( 20 years ago) where indeed men could form meaningful relationships and live fulfilling social lives. Nowadays work is hell, social life is hell, it’s basically a rat race where the guy who sacrifices the most gets to be the good goy to his boss. Don’t give up but don’t sacrifice your lives for others who clearly don’t give a fuck and aren’t worth it anyways.
When I was younger friends seemed important, as I got older all their problems and drama just seemed like a burden. I have casual work and family friends but no real deep connections with anyone but my wife and adult children, and I’m fine with that.
Who doesn’t need appreciation and belonging? These are not features exclusive to men. What a narrow and facile post (for it’s not an article) this is. Some self reflection would’ve provided depth to it somewhat, perhaps identifying from whom you are wishing to gain these features from. And perhaps too some exploration of your own disempowerment and incompetence to provide yourself with these qualities. The capacity to do so are the marks of a mature, evolved, and self actualised human being.
“…A random google search for the term “why men cheat” reveals that the true reason behind men’s infidelity is emotional dissatisfaction, which in rough terms translates to lack of appreciation…”
The only problem with that is most of those articles were written by women.