Due to the unsightly epidemic of beta-male behavior that is currently exploding all around us—the acceleration of which was largely caused by feminism and SJW’s—I recently came up with the idea for a series of satirical men’s magazine covers with the title, Modern Beta Magazine.
After putting them into the comments section of some articles here at ROK not long ago, and summarily being asked by various readers if they could look at them all in one place, I have attempted to comply with those numerous requests right here…
So here they are. All 16 covers.
1. Cooking for cucks
2. The winning play
3. Increase that beta sex drive
4. Earn extra holiday cash
5. 10 solid apologies
6. Rock her world
7. Pigeon-feeding tips
8. No means no
9. Let your wife sleep around – sound wisdom
10. She’s not a slut
11. Tell her you are CIA
12. Should you fake bulimia?
13. Positive benefits of divorce rape
14. Shadow puppets and other cool things
15. Quenching beta thirst
16. Calisthenics for cucks
Summary
Well, gentlemen, at least for today, we are still blessed with freedom of speech. Tomorrow is another story, however, especially if the myriad betas, cucks and simps—and their SJW and feminist handlers—get their way. So please do whatever you can to fight back. Make every possible attempt to wake up those men who are still on the fence. Because if you don’t, they might wind up exactly like the feckless fools on the above magazine covers.
You’ll be glad you did. And you’ll sleep a lot better at night, too.
Sharing this article with your friends and family members might be a good idea as well, if you feel these faux magazine covers have merit. And if those people should become irritated or shocked by them, well, consider it a blessing in disguise…because if that happens, you have just identified some serious beta males.
And as the entire manosphere already knows, they can definitely use all the help they can get…
If you like this article and are concerned about the future of the Western world, check out Roosh’s book Free Speech Isn’t Free. It gives an inside look to how the globalist establishment is attempting to marginalize masculine men with a leftist agenda that promotes censorship, feminism, and sterility. It also shares key knowledge and tools that you can use to defend yourself against social justice attacks. Click here to learn more about the book. Your support will help maintain our operation.
Nice Bob!
Thanks, amigo…
I actually got approached to work on some designs for a love doll company. It’s a booming business.
My first job as a self-employed web developer was a small online gallery with drag&drop upload & preview. Turns out it was for porn.
Gotta start somewhere!
I didn’t mind it at all. That was more honest work than the ‘cool nice newsletter designing’ I have been doing for my old ass of a boss.
So when you tweak your CV do you say that you have experience in the porn industry or what?
“multimedia entertainment” is a better word.
But they gotta now where he has found his no-eyebrows outfit.
I don’t really give a fuck about my CV. That said, if need be, I just put in what I deem important.
That said … I haven’t been working for well a year. My CV is fucked up by now.
Is it really that harsh? I’ve heard about a guy in my country who got into Java programming in his late 20s. He had studied something about economics in the university. So basically you could say he had never worked before, because he had been into another field. They hired him and he was doing well.
I never had problems, but I hear a lot of fearmongery. May all be dust and smoke.
Fearmongery about what, working in web development?
Having a bad CV
Seriously, if you can do the job well, the CV is bullshit.
In a sane world, yes.
Major headline news was made when several people were triggered by a few British dudes from Wall Street who brought a sex doll out in public on a bachelor party.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2016/09/10/british-stag-party-stirs-outrage-by-bringing-sex-doll-to-ground/
That was a blow up doll, not a sex doll. Still it was a little bit on the tasteless side to bring that there.
Total dewsch move
I was triggered a few weeks ago when those nude pics of the fat ghost busters chick was leaked. I had to cuddle with a teddy bear in my safe space. Not the most alpha move but then again that was a special circumstance. I think I cried too.
Did you have to launder the boogers from your snot-nose out of your teddy?
Fuck that was funny…
Fuck that was funny too…
Let’s see who’s laughing when his mommy puts the starch in his drawers when she finds out he’s been spooging the doll.
‘How Saying You’re Sorry Nets You 10 Minutes Of Watching Her Have Sex From The Closet’
That’s awesome. So you mean I finally get to see her naked?
Why yes. Yes you do.
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I was watching Gavin McInnes this morning. The topic was “Cuckmercials.” Enjoy this disgusting cuckmercial. My favorite part happens at :18 when the cuck looks out the window like a mind blown retarded alien in disbelief.
Fuck, that’s terrible! I’m getting the idea that this is not an exception. Good thing I have no TV anymore…
I don’t blame you. Here’s the bit.
Thanks, but no thanks. I am in a delicate spiritual condition. This is harmful.
It’s about time that a list of man bashing commercials such as this were compiled. If the products they are selling were avoided en mass the marketing agencies would have to sit up and take notice. We simply could produce a boycott list outlining the offending products and then make sure it’s distributed across the manosphere. If a company wanted their product off the list all they would have to do is make another advert where the roles are reversed and a woman is belittled in a similar fashion
What a f***king stupid commercial ??KIA not on my list !!
Um….this may seem like a stupid question but is the cuck’s “wife” a woman? Her face and hairstyle are quite angular and masculine.
You might have to buy her a car first…but yeah, this should happen.
I was waiting for this one Bob, good job on your memes.
What I like about these is that some of the articles are meant for humor, while some (especially with pics, ffs) are meant to incite disgust. The random order makes it a stronger meme.
Thank you, my friend…
This is so fucking depressing.
Bob, you fuck, you inspired me.
I dig her face……”Boy you sure got some voluptuous cheeks! Let Mami munch on them! NOM NOM NOM!”
Jeb is testing out a new tactic to see if he can finally get that hug close from Columba…
The picture looks fishy. Did he drop 100 pounds overnight?
It’s that pesky cancer…
How one comment from an alpha “low energy jeb” can sink a presidential candidate.
I’ve met as many Jeb supporters as Hillary supporters
They are the same people.
Astounding, wasn’t it? What’s even more astounding is that Jeb was told that he WOULD be the next President – and he believed it.
Its amazing he got to even run florida such a beta douche.
Nice work, Senor Arrow…
Can we get these in printable format? I want to see these taped up over urinals in random restrooms every where.
I think that’s a rather brilliant idea. Most men would laugh and those that get offended…well…you know who the betas are.
Perfect
This
That’s a great idea. Years back I was the inventor of the red button you see located above urinals in the restrooms of some countries across the world.
https://www.wired.com/design/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/panic-button-light-switch-wired-design.jpg
You push the button AND THE FLOOR SHAKES!! Next I must invent an advertising insert plaque below the button where Mr Smith’s magazine covers can be inserted.
https://ae01.alicdn.com/kf/HTB1Irx2MFXXXXcVXpXXq6xXFXXXX/Warning-Genius-At-Work-font-b-Advertising-b-font-Plaques-Metal-Tin-Plate-Poster-20X30CM-font.jpg
If you right-click on the image, and select “View Image”, it should be fairly printable. If not, let me know, and I’ll try to make them sharper but I think that remedy should get the job done…
I want to post these at the university i graduated from. No risk for me since I dont have any connection there anymore.
Ok, the one with the fat guy pigging out on the fried chicken…wtf is going on with that bird in the background???
Suggest consulting with fatherofthree.
https://www.ncscooper.com/us-defense-department-to-use-gmo-chemtrail-birds/
You know DARPA has already stolen every brilliant idea in that article.
Yea thefuckisthat!?
Just noticed it after you pointed it out. That is what a bird taking a shit mid flight looks like……… either that or it ate some rope…..
That is indeed a bird shitting in midflight…
Thanks Bob. These are excellent.
If only these were on new stands and magazine racks back in the days before the internet.
Thank you good sir…
These are probably standard issue on cuckold fetish magazines if they exisr
Awesome!!
Gracias…
Pretty brutal & excellent, Bob.
Thank you sir…
Fucking fantastic work Mr Smith 😉
Now I got a sudden hankering for fried chicken and cheetohs….
Thank you. Don’t get that orange dust on anything valuable…
Hilarious !!.
I was pissing myself laughing reading those covers.
Yeah, Bob, you gotta spread that kind of material out!
Will do my best…
Thank you…
You seem to have some experience in MISO…
I was at the movies this weekend watching the new movie Sully (quite good actually). There was a 20 something dude crying in the seat right in front of me.
Haven’t seen it. I went to Sausage Party last week and I can testify it is utter garbage. The sjw signalling is off the chart. The only thing that gave me satisfaction as I left was knowing that Seth Rogan is a cuck as demonstrated by Mike Cernovitch and Rogans wife…..fuck Hollywood….. last time they get my dollars……
Bob, in volume 2 is the article on cunnilingus implying that it is a beta move? Will there be a future special on panty sniffing for white knights?
Panty sniffing for white knights – nice visual, sir…
That one’s for free…..
Remember the 1990’s? We saw some of the most intense beta brainwashing immaginable. Without the internet we were at the mercy of the MSM gatekeepers. We were penned up like caged beta barn animals and our faces were sprayed daily with this type of stuff:
https://youtu.be/Og4oC1Z-3JK
Great work! For more ideas you probably just have to watch an hour of NFL commercials or any average TV show.
Thank you kind sir. TV is definitely inspiring in that regard. But only in that regard…
The NFL takes quite a vocal queue in promoting domestic cuckery and emasculation
Sensitivity trained cuck police especially are in league up to their eyeballs with local judiciaries and NGO’s who forcefully dismember traditional families. Combine a radical feminized police force in a jurisdiction with no fault divorce legislation and aggressively enforced mandated reporting policies you’ve got CANADA. No traditional family can survive with the fem zombie zealots breathing down your neck at every moment. Fear your government, fear for your children and trust only your clan and tribe. These ‘high heel march’ regions of the west that are bustling and overflowing with women’s shelters have become largely unsurvivable for the traditional family. A trad family cannot coexist and live in peace with government backed feminist cucks ANYWHERE. Either fight or pack up and run with your tribe. In these regions you’ll see the family patriarch disemboweled and disempowered before the marxist state and by force in most cases.
Note the prominence of COPS at these ‘marches’. On their days off, is this as innocuous and face to face community friendly as these uniformed hero enforcers of social marxism have become? Also note the presence of the many service agencies that specialize in de-integrating women and children from their tribe. Specifically DISSOLUTION OF THE FAMILY by the state is the theme with these events. High heels may be ‘cutesey’ on the surface but no family is safe from government tyranny in these communities.
A single renegade man could sling shit and fight back against the beta/feminist zombot enforcers but a family man and patriarch finds his wom(e)n at risk of being propagandized and his children threatened with being held hostage if he doesn’t grovel to the cuck enforcement standards being paraded in the community. We must keep pumping the steam to expose the marxist/feminist agitators and their fake crisis actor promoters.
Pretty spot on.
Raising a pack of thuglets is an awfully high price to pay for sex. I think I’d prefer to die alone if given the choice. But all around me I see guys marrying/supporting loser single mothers. It’s practically a rite of passage in the IT world.
I find myself biting my tongue a lot at work. I want to tell guys that all they have to do is lift and fake confidence. Or that they make 80K a year and shouldn’t have to settle for the fat woman with a mulatto son.
Direct them towards Tom Leykis on Youtube.
The daughter of a family friend just had her fourth baby for the third father of her kids.
This father is in jail for beating her. I’m told she constantly complains that good men don’t “appreciate” how she doesn’t ask for much.
Perhaps they don’t appreciate being expected to marry a low quality woman who can’t keep her legs closed? I heard she was very offended that her brother demanded that she get her tubes tied. Maybe she should go live in a pasture with all the other broodmares. Yuck.
LOLZ..absolutely hilarious! Great work!
Grazie…gracias…and thanks.
Cunnilingus Tips for the loyal Cuck hahaha!
These are very good. It would be good to distribute the more benign ones widely. People might then be drawn into the racier ones
Thanks. Good idea. Print ’em out…
So he could make money off of a real mag from the genuine cucks who would buy them and take it seriously, thereby financing the wider distribution…
Exactly
“Rock her world: get her a big male dog”
Cucked by your german shepherd.
Come on now, son, that’s literally (Hitler).
So…cunnilingus is out if I want to be an alpha superman?
Not if you’re married to a good woman.
Maybe a tutorial on how to edit the sex tape you made of your wife and her bf?
Nice…might have to do one of those…
Include tips on lighting, editing software, how to make her boyfriend comfortable and so on.
Did you make them?
Yessir…I did.
Good work! I really like them all but my favorite is number 9. “Cool hobbies to keep you busy while she gets gangbanged.” Fucking genious!
Thanks bro!
Admits my bouts of laughter, I almost felt sorry for the cucks on account of those pathetic sorry pictures. But I quickly reminded myself, these things are the problem. All pity purged
Another bob smith article. Stereotype confirmed white males are most beta of all races.
White males don’t need any special subsidized assistance programs to help them be more alpha and more in control of their tribeswomen. But notice that massive campaigns of brainwashing, pharma doping and assault by police force is necessary to suspend the west, to prevent white tribal hegemony, to arrest white family formation and the production of offspring and to maintain the propping up of white women like hillary puppets over their communities and homes. If the wrecking ball destructo program over the west had its plug pulled, white men would surge overnight like a tidal wave and restore natural order to the western lands and the women would fold and bend toward the patriarchal order like blades of tall grass in unison bending over for the wind.
You wax poetic, Mr. McGoo.
Thank you sir
At least 2 of them seemed to imply that licking pussy is beta. I just love the taste. I wouldn’t want to give that up just to be more alpha.
Tastes great? Less filling?
Thank you Mr. Smith. I don’t have to go hunting.
You’re welcome, Ms. Ella…
Cuck hunting.
man that was painful to browse through, couldn’t make it past the third picture.
These magazine covers brought the tune of hard knock life to my head with new words.
It’s a cucked up life for us. A cucked up life for us.
Get it get it!
You can see,
We sit when we pee.
It’s a cucked up life.
I need feminism because…I still feel “unmanly” when my girlfriend ravishes me with a strap-on dildo