We’re living in the age of weakness. The average modern man is becoming a bigger and bigger pussy. From living in constant fear of his boss to living under the control of his bossy girlfriend, the average man has sacrificed much of what it means to be a man. If these weak behaviors weren’t enough, his body is so soft it could be used for a baby wipes commercial and his style is closer to that of a woman’s.
Below I’ll cover the three most common ways I see men showing weakness on a day-to-day basis. Catch yourself doing these things, recognize it, and then stop.
1. Stop apologizing
If there was a way to capture the frequency the word “sorry” is used in conversation over time, I’m positive that it would be at its peak in 2014.
Yes, there are situations that warrant an apology, but they’re few and far between compared to how much I hear the word used. I constantly hear men apologizing for the stupidest things everyday. Yesterday I witnessed a man apologize to me repeatedly at the gym as he shuffled behind me to get to a piece of equipment. I didn’t have to move. He had room. At most, an “excuse me” was warranted on the first occasion. But no, he was so afraid he was going to offend me that continued to cry “sorry” like a little puppy.
Another example I can recall involves one of my personal training clients. Every time he had trouble learning a new exercise, his first instinct was to apologize to me. Give me a break. I don’t expect every movement to come to you naturally. And if you’re frustrated that’s okay, but why are you apologizing to me? You’re paying me to help you learn this shit.
So stop fucking apologizing everywhere you go. You’re not hurting anyone’s feelings, and if you do every once in a while, it’s not the end of the world if you don’t apologize. In today’s day and age, I’d rather err on the side of not apologizing, rather than risk becoming addicted to it’s use and being a bitch. And in the rare occasion that you have harmed someone, it’s better to act to fix the situation rather than bombarding them with a storm of “sorrys”.
2. Stop explaining yourself
This might be my biggest pet peeve. Especially when I catch myself doing it. A lot of guy’s first instinct, when they say something that isn’t met with immediate praise and acceptance, is to start rationalizing what they said. This screams weakness and lack of self-confidence louder than anything else I can think of.
To continue my stream of personal training examples, yesterday I informed a lady that I’d no longer be conducting sessions after 6PM. I knew this was a situation where I might jump the gun and offer a big explanation up front, so I prepared myself. I started by simply stating, “No, going forward I can’t do Thursdays at 8PM.” Rather than explaining why or try to appease her initial reaction—I waited. Of course, she asked me why, and commented how perfect it worked out for her at that time. I responded by saying I simply decided not to do late sessions anymore. I may have lost a client, but I was prepared for that outcome and didn’t let my instinct to please everyone get in the way of what I wanted.
If you don’t get instant validation of something you say, that’s okay. Leave the burden on the other party to ask a question or make a counter argument before you start droning on and defending what you said.
3. Stop complaining
Everyone has a friend or family member that complains a lot. Do you think of this person as confident or strong? No, they appear weak. Their constant need to express how things aren’t going perfectly for them is just annoying. And it’s no wonder that “bitching” has become a synonym for “complaining”—when you complain you embody a defining characteristic of the classic bitch. When you complain you’re really saying “I don’t like the way something is going but I’m too afraid or lazy to do anything about it myself so I’m going to tell you about it instead.”
Have you ever been on a date with a girl who just moans and whines the entire time? It’s the worst, and it immediately disqualifies her for anything long-term. Realize that it’s no different when you complain. You annoy anyone who you complain to, and you condition yourself to bitch about things instead of manning up and doing something about it.
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Read More: The Only 2 Things A Man Can Depend On
4. Stop comparing.
Comparing yourself to others is a waste of time and energy. Situations are so incomprehensibly different that it only serves you better to focus on your own game, and at the same time reduce the tendency to make excuses, cover up weaknesses or project fallacies. That is the root of strength, personal integrity and the courage to advance irrespective of your surroundings.
No. 2 has beaten me before. Never again. What seems like valuable context just ends up becoming pathetic backpedaling.
Good one! In theory, extreme cockiness solves all of these problems. However, the midpoint you’re speaking of is ideal. Being an asshole is still infinitely than being a pussy though.
Couldn’t agree more.
I think no. 2 is the worst. A careful apology can be endearing – tactical almost. Complaining is pretty awful too but it can be a way to camouflage with the sheep of the world (re: hiding power level), but explaining yourself is a neon sign that you have zero conviction.
True. We never totally know what the other person’s story is. They may appear fabulous on the outside when their life sucks in reality.
I make one exception to this rule.
If he walks like a dick, and talks like a dick, I’m gonna call him a dick.
Practice Methods for Halting These Behaviors
Apologizing: Acknowledge that apology is the worst form of respect possible (another one of those horrendous traits schools advocate). Or just grow some balls; this is purely a confidence issue.
Explaining: When it’s quiet, just say, “Well fuck you too!/Ah, fuck you guys” or just wait as recommended.
Complaining: Think “Am I a bitch?” Answer in your thoughts with a firm “Hell no”, and continue in the tough times.
Stop laughing at everything.
I see so many men, “Hahahaha”, “LOL”. Stop. There’s no way the text was that funny. And if you’re watching a funny YouTube clip with a group of people, it’s okay if you don’t find it all that funny. Don’t ever force a laugh to make someone feel better.
If you absolutely must incorporate laughter into your texts, go with “Ha”. It’s so vague whether you found something funny or are being condescending. Either way, you and the joke teller live and you get to keep your dignity.
Right on. Hate this shit, especially beta men when they get around chicks. Women aren’t funny- on purpose anyway. Stop laughing at their shitty attempts at humor. I’m pretty sure I have never legitimately laughed at anything a woman has said when she was deliberately trying to be funny. They aren’t going to fuck some goober that dur hur hur’s at their inanities- so give it a rest.
I’ve literally been in a group setting where everyone except for myself was blatantly fake laughing. It’s pathetic, don’t join in- you’ll be a better man for it.
I remember a colleague saying something about this, in reference to a lot of mainstream male celebs. He mentioned too the constant shit-eating grins that guys like Tom Cruise, Val Kilmer and the likes are always putting out to the World all the time. As he described it, “Too much teeth these douche bags are showing, too much fucking teeth.”
Val Kilmer’s fat ass is still around?
Fatman Forever…
Also, never, ever, hesitate to drop a Homer-Simpson-esque “BORING” on a woman’s never ending, inane, unstoppable train of thought story about whatever yawn worthy events made up her day.
Women are all very boring. Lucky for them they were born with holes between their legs.
genius
Very nice–actually the way that Homer trolls Frank Grimes is a pretty good blueprint for how you need to treat chicks. “Change the channel, Marge!”
I once had a woman bore me so much (really very hot so that tells you a lot) that I actually had my sister answer the phone and tell her I was too busy and couldn’t be disturbed.
That chick never recovered from the humiliation and hated me forever afterwards…
I wouldn’t worry about it, I’m sure her beta father listened to her babble on endlessly about what a jerk you were.
They usually do. I’ve had a fun time mocking a few of them in the clubs. I can only imagine how butthurt it makes them feel when some guy walks up and has all her beta-male orbiters laughing at her expense.
Or the David Alan Grier snoring bit…….
Good job, you’re a dick
quote of the century mr. random guest poster
You’re fucking sexist. Women aren’t just little idiots with no reason to be alive, keep in mind without them you wouldn’t of been alive. Ungrateful little bitch. 🙂
Are you sure women are not funny at all, the other day they did an experiment and they are actually less funny, but just a bit, from what I have observed is accurate, the other day I read a facebook conversation between 2 female friends and I think it was quite funny :
Gutierrez- Eres una cursi jajaja ntc
Rodriguez – jajaja se me pego de ti e.e
Gutierrez -d mi??? Eso es imposible según todos soy muy fría y mala jajajajajaja
Rodriguez -Acaso eres un refrigerador? jajajaaj ok’n xD
Gutierrez -Mmmm no se pero… creo que sii jajaja a parte m encanta tener comida cerca así que yo creo y si jajajaja
Rodriguez -Yeeei tengo una amiga refrigeradoooor! jajajajja xD
I’ve legitimately laughed at things women have said.
Not coincidentally, these women have all been girls raised from blue-collar, traditional, religious families. I’ve yet to laugh at a joke made by a woman from preppy suburbia or urban culture.
I notice more older women being funny. I work with a few over 55 and they can be very funny. They just tell amusing stories from their life. Younger women try and it tends not to hit home as much with me because it seems like an attempt at controlling the room or space that they are in. I guess you could say they were seeking approval. These older women just don’t care if you laugh or not. seems more genuine.
Yes. There’s only one time when laughing uproariously seemed to help me with a hot girl. I had encountered a silly, really aggressive guy schmooze a second, more mediocre girl and state how I was “oozing testosterone”… and I kept a blank expression, only cutting loose after the guy and girl had gone, thereby showing control (I didn’t laugh when he was actually there) and giving her one of those “bonding” moments that girls go nuts for. (But also note it was something in the environment I was laughing at, not anything the hot girl herself had said.)
Haha you’re right about that one.
Especially when some girl makes some stupid, unfunny,generic joke,.Makes me wanna pimp slap these thirsty asses “She ain’t gonna fuck you if you praise everything she does you pathetic thirsty simp!!!”
I actually got called on laughing so much, although it was simply part of my personality and nothing more.
It was with a rather difficult latina, and it made me really pause and think about how I conveyed myself. Since then I’ve tried to evaluate my formerly beta/weak/natural behaviors, mannerisms, body language, and speech patterns.
It did not give the impression of a confident, sincere man was what I ultimately realized.
Look at what people say. See how they behave. A man can learn a lot about people and thusly himself when he sees the world through the red pill / analytical viewpoint. There’s an ENORMOUS amount of information in what people say, do, and how the subconsciously operate daily. There’s SO MUCH useful information to learn from.
Laughing is fine as long as its in some fool’s face….
… and its even better when its the last laugh.
I prefer ‘heh’. it’s nicely noncommital.
Good one!!!
rotflmfao
My dad used to tell me: men should be frugal with laughter, and when they do never show your molar teeth (i.e. the back of your mouth).
ROFLCOPTER!
ROFLWAFFLES!
Forgot to mention the Xs. I’ve seen men put xx at the end of their texts to women and sometimes to other men even. Sad, pathetic, try hard and transparent
x
I actually legitly laughed about what a woman said to me recently, but it was unintentional on her part. She was a chunky stocky girl who tried to give me tips how to mack on women in a bar. She told me to try and catch eye contact from across the room and wait for a smile before approaching to better my chances. Sounds always solid, right? What if she’s not looking my way? She told me that the girl isn’t interested and I shouldn’t approach her because that’d be creepy. That’s when I lol’d
I feel that number one and two are generally accepted concepts in the manosphere but are rarely really understood. If you have people nagging you, the worst thing you can do is indulge that nagging in any way. Instead just look neutral and say “okay”. An aloof approach is quite often the best approach. You can’t always say “fuck it” and ditch the person from your life after all. If you can, all the more power for you but reality doesn’t always work out like that.
Simply acknowledging their discontent but not reacting to it will usually yield very good results. The person is caught off-guard and will often reconsider their anger and wonder if they’re overreacting. If they don’t they’ll at least learn that this type of behaviour probably won’t work on you, with exceptions to the rule of course.
An added bonus is that this will actually make you feel calmer and more at peace in stressful situations. If you can internalize this type of behaviour you’ll be less invested in the problem and therefore more in control of the situation.
This works especially well with females.
I like to give them a raised eyebrows/ever-so-slightly-amused face when I say “ok” or some similar response. It shows I find them amusing, but don’t take them seriously.
It also amazes me how many guys order their food at a fast food restaurant or concession stand and says, “Can I have a (fill in the blank)? And can I get a…?” These are 5′ 9″ and taller weighing close to 200 lb and over guys.
What a wussy! Say, “I’ll have that triple patty burger wrapped in lettuce with cheese!” or “Give me the (fill in the blank)!” and look the cashier directly in the eyes when you order whether it’s a man or woman.
Pay attention next time when you’re out and you’ll see what I mean.
I used to be that way, but no more after I realized how weak that sounds.
Having worked in the food service industry before, I can GUARANTEE the customers perceived as most difficult and demanding are the ones most likely to have their food messed with. Being polite with people whom handle your food is always the best policy.
Absolutely. Any dick that comes into a restaurant or bar and starts with “Gimme this” or “Gimme that” is just as bad as any entitled chick. If someone is serving you, show respect and request a drink, request food. You’re not due anything wherever you go. remember that.
Seriously, there’s some people here who think being a man means turning everything into one big pissing contest.
You’re giving someone your order, unless they’re giving you shit then you’re in the position of power by default. How insecure do you have to be to go out of your way to remind people that you’re the boss? And how impotent do you have to be in your regular life to feel the need to power trip on the kid making minimum wage at a fast food place?
Er. Disagree. You don’t have to say “can I?” like a fucking child, you can be polite with a “I’ll have the bacon cheeseburger, please.”
Quit being a pussy saying please.. its almost worse than apologizing for putting in your order!.. RIGHT!?! RIGHT!!??!
I’ve always wondered, why is it frontline food service workers want to give you what they want and not what you order. Is it because these places are tight on money or pure laziness?
Nonsense.
It’s not what you say, it’s HOW YOU SAY IT.
“I’ll have the …” and “give me a …” are perfectly fine if it doesn’t sound loud, demanding, or otherwise threatening or demeaning. Say ’em like they’re no big deal and they will be perceived as exactly that: no big deal. That’s just my experience, and I do exactly what John H. suggests ALL THE TIME.
These are “power” phrases that drop subtle hints of dominance and can they can be used for a lot of other things.
Game isn’t just about getting women.
They’re just words. But actions speak louder than words. And if you act like an asshole, you’re going to get treated like an asshole.
You aren’t in a position of dominance when you are ordering food from someone. You are vulnerable to whatever whimsical notions they have about you. They can fuck you over easily without you knowing or ever being able to retaliate. I knew one guy that would mess with food is someone didn’t say “please” in their order. Try your “power phrases” with him or someone else like him and you’ll be having a great meal. When I worked in an ice cream shoppe anyone that acted remotely like an asshole would get ice cream scooped with my bare, unwashed hand from one of the old buckets.
Like I said, what you say doesn’t matter so much if you don’t ACT like an asshole.
I hear on not being a submissive pussy but I am certain if you are showing dominance on the ghetto/trailer trash taking your order I would guess you get quite a bit of spit, pubes, jizz etc etc in your food.
I just not sure saying “can I get a number 4” makes you a pussy.
Perhaps I should not have used an exclamation point in my post. I can now see how it may seem like I’m demanding my order while pounding my fist on the counter. It was not meant to convey that way.
What I was trying to show was ordering in a direct, confident tone of voice while with a slight smile. Not condescending or anything like that. Too bad I can’t express voice tone in a post.
(Not saying sorry…BTW)
OK, now I get you… sort of.
Not using that little gay high-pitched emphasis at the end of the sentence would work too.
That sounds like a round-about sorry to me.
Saying “Can I get a number 4?” shows you are asking for permission…like you’re begging for it.
You are paying for your food and for them to serve you. You do not need to ask for permission. Agreed that you should also be polite to the person handling your food, but you should not sound weak. Show respect. That’s all.
Honestly, some of the topics on here are ridiculous. You could just as well argue that reading this article is pretty beta. The real alpha thing is do whatever the fuck you want, whether it is laughing or bitching or knocking someone out cold.
be neutral. “I’ll have number 4′ or “i’d like number 4′ is nicely neutral, polite, and not too submissive in case the 19 year old girl behind the counter is worth fucking.
Or am I the only one who lives in a place where every fast food restaurant has at least two fresh-faced cum dumpsters?
That’s pretty common. Also common is that I wouldn’t want my dick anywhere near that……my wife used to run a local joint and you wouldn’t believe the stories she can tell you about her employees.
What about a 5’3 man doing the same thing, does it have the same reaction ? I’m 5’11, but my shorter friends complain of disrespect, and I want to shut them up..
I’m short and Black, but hitting the gym helped me gain some respect, even from Asian women. Not enough for my liking, but it’s a start.
All of my life, I’ve tried to be respectful, but direct when ordering things. I’ve always tried to avoid saying “Can I get a [X]” not because it came off as beta or wussy, but rather because it came off as tacky, something that people with low standards would say.
I can’t remember if it was you or someone else, but I think you said you were 5’7..that ain’t short, that is average height.
Yeah keep at it man, I believe in you. I know black guys put on muscle real quick, you will have women in no time.
I think there was this 5’6 black porn star who bangs hotties all the time and hangs out with porn stars.I forgot his name, but if I remember, I’ll find that vid and link you.
In some countries, the correct way to order food is actually “Give me X”
Ya know….I don’t even think about how I’m ordering the food. I usually just treat the people at the restaurant like I’m having a good day and more than happy to share some of that fun with them.
Dear everyone in this thread, if you are bitching about how a guy orders a #1.. you are the bitch you claim he is. WHO GIVES A SHIT!?!
You’re a clown, stop embarrassing yourself.
Very often someone will ask “why?”. They aren’t really looking for an answer. It’s a way for them to put you on the defensive. If you comply it will never cease. Females are notorious for doing this. If you are a nice guy, often you will go along with the trap and then feel like a dupe. In the extreme case be prepared to say “I don’t own you an explanation” otherwise diplomatically dodge it and maintain your frame. A flat “because I feel like it” also works. Or “because God wants it that way”.
Excellent points!
But on the subject of seeing coworkers out in public, I find I’m often dissappointed.
Recently I saw an employee of the IT department in my company while I was out getting lunch at Pollo Tropical. He seemed to not even recognize me, despite being near me multiple times in the server room at work.
The lack of comradery and men associating with other men is very dissappointing to me and honestly I think it is shows a lack of masculine involvement.
Funny how the truly relaxed, nice-to-be-around guys at work are the black dudes. None of that isolationism and weak-ass bullshit from most of them.
A wave of the hand, a handshake, or punching fists and we’re cool.
I just can’t understand how somebody can act as if they don’t know someone when out in public and share a moment to relate honest truths between themselves.
But then again, I suppose only real men give a damn about talking to other men and forming bonds that matter. Introverted, socially retarded men can’t accomplish that, or so I’ve learned.
Those guys are avoiding you because they are scared. IT drones are some of the worst. Different from seeking someone out and acting like long-lost friends just because you work in the same corporation, then getting into a lame-ass conversation about “work”.
Interesting response.
Out of the same department, the two younger guys (who happen to be black) are confident, and very friendly and cool guys, and basically the OPPOSITE of the kind of men I’m describing.
Yes, the other guys around me (engineers) are fairly weak it’s honestly kind of sad.
I noticed this about black guys too at work. And older men — the Greatest Generation ones, who are now retired. A lot of the younger IT guys were Beta bitches who walked around like they were Little Lord Fauntleroy.
Introverted men can easily accomplish “bonds that matter”, you just didn’t matter. However, socially retarded men may have more difficulties.
Same subject as “Stop being such a faggot” but much better article. GJ Jefe!
4. Stop caring what other people think of you.
When a leftist whines about “antisocial behavior”, that’s usually code for a free and independent man. Suffer your own failings, reap your own rewards.
Hi Xu : D ,I am a White Hispanic Buddhist ; ) ,I see you are Asian, just asking, are you a fellow Buddhist ? : 3 , I know Asians HAVE higher rates of Buddhism 🙂
It’s an Asian person! Quick, ask him questions about Asia!
Maybe he can tutor me in math!
Damn. Is it shithead o’clock already?
I’d like to learn Kung fu please.
From one of your past posts:
“The true religion is Buddhism, enough said, the success of Buddhist
countries is impressive : Japan ( with its Pokémon ), South Korea
(Gangnam Style) ,Taiwan (Meteor Garden ), Hong Kong (Buddha bless Jackie
Chan as he is a loyal and proud Buddhist) and Singapore (such a clean
and not corrupt country).”
You’re either a dedicated troll or something is seriously wrong with you.
In my medical opinion, he may be suffering from low testosterone.
It’s a she, don’t talk to it.
I dunno, I kinda like Singapore, but I see a lot more catholicism than buddhism.
More or less. While I don’t advocate sociopathic or disrespectful behavior, it’s important to lose the fear of negative judgement by others.
Listen to constructive criticism and constructive criticism only. For all other situations, “Haters gonna hate”
Agreed. It’s vital to listen to feedback, roll it around, and either toss it or incorporate it based on its merits…and definitely not by whether a pretty girl said it.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…
Oh, you were serious? You don’t advocate disrespectful behaviour? Look as this fucking site for five fucking seconds, and get your nose out of the bullshit you’ve been sniffing.
You should cut the phrase, “Going forward” out of your lingo to avoid sounding like a corporate douche.
There are far too many times I hear guys say “sorry”. Like it is a reaction to so many things that they might offend someone else. If one is truly sorry, then you should say “I apologize” instead. It requires more of a thought instead of a response. Now, I hear girls say sorry way too much but there are effective ways to handle that in many situations.
Absolutely. And we both know that the stronger men in a social setting are most certainly not kissing ass and saying “sorry.” This should she be a very powerful lesson to men who aspire to leave their formerly weaker sides in the past.
I prefer a simple “I regret…” when necessary.
“I regret you are upset with…”
“I regret we can’t see eye to eye on…”
“I regret sleeping with your sister…”
I do have my regrets at times, but I am never sorry. Never apologize.
My pet peeve is with people who start a comment with ‘no offense but…’ or “I am sorry but…” and then proceed to say something stupid, smarmy, or offensive.
If you are going to be offensive, at least be honest about it.
And I will admit I sometimes do that myself, it’s a hard habit to break.
Yeah, exactly! I’ve stopped apologizing for my opinion. It’s my opinion/statement/etc. and if it is already coming out of my mouth, it’s because I’m sure of myself and my thoughts.
No need to apologize or be “sensitive” with the truth or real opinions.
well, i do like warning people I am about to be offensive as hell, and they might want to think about what I say before they do something they are going to regret until they heal.
At least you’re being real. How many people are any more?
oh, being real… I gotta admit, I have spent some quality time in stitches too 🙂 It’s all fun though. The jail time sucks, but you can still have fun with it.
Funny thing, I have spent more jail time for being a ‘deadbeat dad’ than I ever did for a fight. I mean, as long as you don’t pull a weapon or do any really serious damage, most guys won’t call the cops, and if they do, you generally look at no more than a couple of weeks in the tank. Meet some interesting people… the ‘real’ crooks don’t wind up in the tank.
I strongly recommend jail time for anyone that wants to stop being a bitch. Not prison, jail. (avoid prison like the plague. it gets you a record, kills your chances of getting a job, and you don’t learn anything). Whenever I hear people talking about how scared they are of getting in a brawl I just have to laugh.
Here’s another one : “I’ll be honest with you…”
They are about to lie in your face.
I do say “I hate to tell you”.. when I really don’t hate to.. or.. maybe I do.. but its necessary.
This article really hit home. Thanks, Jefe.
From personal experience:
1. In my more beta/pre-self analysis days, I was once on a work assignment with a contractor and he made the off-comment about me apologizing too much. He said something to the effect of, “You’ve must have been criticized a lot when you were growing up. You apologize too much.”
Unfortunately other people often keep their thoughts to themselves, but when they do, that feedback is FAR more valuable than money. In my case, I grew up with a father who never provided a masculine role model and grew up with a somewhat cold and very critical mother. Later in life my constant saying “I’m sorry” might have seemed innocent enough to me, but conveyed a far worse idea to others, just as Jefe wrote.
Later (and I still do) I never needlessly apologize or kiss ass as is so common now adays. Upon reflection, and seeing the weaker “men” around me at work, I see how saying “Sorry” needlessly to others is an admission of submission and a lack of confidence. Henceforth I always check myself and now I DO NOT APOLOGIZE FOR NO REAL TRANSGRESSIONS. I only apologize when I’m at fault, and then I do not dwell on it. Handle it like a confident man and then move on.
2. Constantly explaining myself (a.k.a., a serious lack of confidence) gave others the impression I wasn’t sure of myself, and in some cases could not make serious decisions or defend my choices be they right or wrong.
3. Complaining too much: STOP IT! No one wants to hear it! It makes a man sound like a little bitch to constantly bitch and moan. Leave that up to women to do.
Everday take a moment and think before you speak. Before you say “I’m sorry”, or you feel the need to submit and explain yourself, or before you start on a rant, ask yourself if you really need to do it. Then keep your mouth shut.
Remember that the hardest battle you’ll fight is with yourself. Articles like this are invaluable, because they show us common threads amongst men and allow us to call ourselves out, and then move forward and free ourselves from our weaknesses unlike so many men who never will.
Love these articles. Fucking *~ excellent ~*
this is my life too, and I can guarantee you’re less fucked up than me, so don’t be too down on yourself.
Thanks, amigo.
Unfortunately small things seem to add up and as I’ve learned in my adult life can cause some pretty serious confidence & personality issues.
Between having a shitty family situation and growing up in a society where men are mislead in what they need to be it is a seriously difficult personal situation to get out of sometimes.
I can’t even imagine how it must be for others who had *real* issues to deal with in life. Compared to them, I’m lucky.
For some unlucky men these discussions are a good way to give them a gut check and correct these problems.
That’s a very good point and why groups like these are important. A good bit of the men on these site may not have had an optimal upbringing, maybe a lack of a father figure and overabundance of feminine figures–which don’t help young men in an arena expecting men to be all that and bulletproof. Building confidence and undoing beta is worthwhile, because being a beta probably isn’t something mist men choose to be. They sort of are born into it
Exactly. It’s not easy, but certainly worthwhile to undo “beta.” I do believe we are born into environments that promote being a “nice guy” (a.k.a, beta) but also conditioned by popular media. Then unfortunately really cemented when no masculine father figure is involved growing up.
Great article and great comment. I see some of this in myself.
“Remember that the hardest battle you’ll fight is with yourself. ” sooo true mate, so true. Thanks for the motivation, I needed it today.
Absolutely. I’ve been terrible at this and it’s only been the past year that I’ve actually stopped myself from apologising so much.
Most people won’t mind, and you’ll come across as much more confident and self-assured.
you forgot #1…stop associating with the wrong women. If they display any sort of drama, drop them no matter how good the screw was the night before. they tried to hook you with how good they screw. the better they do it, the more they think they have power. never forget that. women don’t enjoy sex like you and I enjoy do. It’s a power move for them so the better they are, it’s like plopping down a 100,000 bribe to a congressman to them. remember that. better they screw you, the more power they think they have then the drama starts. they never show that until…the first screw. and if they’re really, really good at it they test you.
5. Make sure not to smile too much. Learn to recognize what a supplicating beta smile looks like, and if you do it, learn to change your facial expression. Under the right circumstances, smiling is effective and charismatic. However, under the wrong circumstances, you are grinning like a fool. Your facial expressions are mostly subconscious, so you often will continue with the supplicating smiles, but if you change your facial expression every time you are conscious of it, and if you focus on developing a cocky, self confident attitude, then you will gradually reprogram your subconscious, until the supplicating smile is no longer part of your repertoire of facial expressions.
6. Don’t nod in agreement all the time. Back in my blue pill days, I occasionally found myself nodding almost continually in agreement as another person was talking. It’s one thing to nod at appropriate times, but it’s another thing to have your head bobbing the whole time someone is talking to you.
You could say these kind of things are Alpha 101, but it’s useful to give specific examples of what behavior to change to appear more confident and dominant. So many of us were crushingly beta in the past, and it takes time and instruction to learn how to act like a real man.
Excellent points!
i have a problem with #2 in these situations. how do i apply this if someone calls me out on my blunder or i offend them and they cuss me out. how do i do this?not apologizing is easy but reasoning is another.because the only thought that runs through my mind is to fight em and we know thats a bad idea.
any advice would be much appreciated.
If you made a mistake, own up to it and tell him you’ll fix it. “My bad. I’ll take care of it.”
If you truly believe what you said and they go ape shit on you, then just think “Fuck’em!” and ignore them. No need to explain or argue. If it’s a woman, read the article on how to deal with a bitch a couple of months back here on RoK.
ok cuz this happen to me last year where may have been annoyin n not relized it. the guy comes an says fuck off youre bothering her dont talk to her.
didnt know she was annoyed or that they were couple but i got heated and wanted to punch the guy. but i was being loud to maintain conversation with the group. but i trued to be nice shook his hand and said i was talkin to whole group an he said dont talk to her and im reply alright.
but i did look straight at him but was sittings adjacent to me cuz i was pissed n ready to fight but obvousily id be thrown out of campus.
so in that situation was i beta? cause i still wished i challenged him out back. cause i am not the smartest talker. really wished i had the gift of the gab.
So almost sounds like you had a guy “white knight” on you? Or were they really a couple?
Not beta, & sounds like you acted pretty well (tried to shake his hand) etc.
Just be confident and don’t show submission-if it’s a case where you did something socially wrong, then maybe a small “excuse me” or a relaxed “sorry about that”, or something like that and a handshake, etc. With a confident smile.
If another guy is being a dick, don’t worry any more except for when you have to be the bigger man and try to keep the peace, but don’t puss out and apologize just because someone is acting like a little bitch especially when he’s trying to look macho in front of a woman/women.
In the past, I used to apologize anyway, and guess what-that means they controlled the situation and in doing so I was showing submission. NOT ANYMORE.
If someone’s out of line but expects an apology, I basically don’t care anymore. Not going to kiss anyone’s ass. And I’ll tell them that if I need to.
Use your best judgement in that case, and instead of apologizing say something else depending on the situation. Like “Hey man, no big deal”, or as I do, I raise my eyebrows, always looking them in the eye.
thanx for the input guys.
and yes apperntly they were a couple…rather surprised by it.
The fact that that this guy got all tough and barked at you shows that he was jealous and actually made him look weak in front of his girl. Best thing for you to do is maintain your composure and ignore him. Look at the girl’s eyes with a slight smirk like “get a load of this guy. What’s up his ass.” look. She’ll get it and recognize what an ass she’s going out with. She’ll dump his ass eventually.
Jealousy is a weak emotion.
Isn’t #3 what you boys do here all day long?
You could take away that from only reading the TITLES of most of these blogs.
I complained in front of a girl today. Not one I was talking to, but she was within earshot. Immediately realized how stupid it was.
6. Don’t let others tell you how to live your life. It is fine to seek advice, but make your own decisions.
7. Never follow the crowd for the sake of being “one of the gang”. It’s fine to be in the mainstream but always retain independence.
8. Polish your outward appearance. Look at most men walking around in public. Their outward appearance makes them either look like a sloth or gay. Determine who you are an express it by what you wear. Appear to others as a man, just a man-child.
9. Read books, preferably anything published before 1963. The red pill is all about educating yourself about reality, not the fucked up made up world we live in today.
10. Stop reading the news and talking about current affairs. Most of it is processed, politicized, and inaccurate. Don’t waste your time trying to figure out “the truth” or even anything going on outside of the immediate area where you live.
11. You are not entitled to anything. Don’t even act like you are entitled to government benefits even if you meet the criteria necessary to pull them down. Entitlements will make you a slave. In the long run you are better off sleeping on a park bench then living under a roof in public housing.
12. Build self confidence. It is the utmost trait that will make you successful in life. Lift weights. Lose weight. Wear better clothes. Speak with authority. Command respect and ye shall receive it.
13. Stop being “nice”. Maybe this should be number one. People with power say “be nice” to control you and regulate your behavior, but never reciprocate “being nice”. If you act like a doormat people will walk all over you.
14. Never loan anyone money with maybe the exception of your immediate family. If someone needs money give it to them as a gift or give them nothing at all. Loans are for banks and giant corporations to hand out. Not you.
15. Fuck a higher end escort. Treat her like your jailhouse bitch. Dump your load on her face. Throw $500 dollars at her. Walk out of the room. Then bask in the feeling of power that will ensue. You just made some bitch your bitch then threw crackers at her for the experience. That is what happens every day, more or less, to men that allow it. If you don’t want to get fucked like you boned the whore, use the experience to teach yourself not to end up like her.
QUOTE: “9. Read books, preferably anything published before 1963. The red pill is all about educating yourself about reality, not the fucked up made up world we live in today.”
I consider myself a somewhat avid reader, but not a book worm. However I do get the impression that “literature” has really turned to shit on a stick around over the past few decades. There are rare exception of course, for example “Manipulated Man” by Esther Vilar (1971) and books like “Future Shock” by Alvin Toffler (thhough I don’t care at all for his lefty political views) and Neil Postman. But I’m inclined to agree that things published around the 1963 mark had better forethought.
One of the things contributing to the downfall of quality writing is a side effect of POD and self publshing technologies. On one hand the monopoly of the publishing world has been greatly neutralized with the ease of establishing small indie publishing houses. Yet on the other hand now any moron can shit out text on paper and get a very nice, slick looking cover, with ISBN and Library of Congress control number, etc making it look like a real book but having no intellectual redeeming quality whatsoever.
I think it is still a good thing that we now have such easier publishing means at our dsiposal, but it behooves anybody to filter through whagt is out there to separate quality writing from the garbáge.
American men are some of the most boring, effeminate, sheepish, comformist beta bitches that exist. Most of them just shy away from controversial ideas out of nothing more than fear. These idiots walk around in t-shirt, shorts and sandals in their 20s, pretending that “Everything is all good;” worship athletes (real alpha males), follow the NAWALT line to the point, and genuinely don’t believe in anything other than what they are fed by TV, left or right.
Most white men are like that, regardless of where in the world they live, with the possible exception of the countries that comprise the old USSR.
American hipsters might be the worst, I think.
But definitely agree with what you say.
Sounds like you live in or have visited New England, where that seems to be more pervasive. You’d be hard pressed to find an effeminate, know nothing, be nothing man out in, say, Montana, Wyoming or the Dakotas. There is a small streak of chivalry that needs to be dealt with, but by and large they’ll tell you what they think without reservation, most of them carry guns, and the women they marry are far more traditional than in most other places. Hell there was an article about a year ago of some transplant who moved to WY from California who bitched to city hall because some feminist crap wasn’t tolerated in her neighborhood and the politician told her to pack her bags and leave if she didn’t like it.
I’m scouting homes out in Wyoming and South Dakota this summer actually. Expand your horizons friend, come out West. You’ll be glad you did.
Where ever you are, you’ve just have to be your own man.
A lot of truth there, and I am a black American male.
I salute you sir.
These are the kind of articles that prove ROK is worth gold, especially for men who just started swallowing the red pill, decided to improve themselves and already took action…
I’m in Australia right now mad my friend apologizes to everyone and explains his actions all the time. For example he asked me how he should explain why can’t make it to his sisters friends bday. I simply told him to no explanation was needed because he hardly knew the bitch.
It’s hard trying to get him to take the red pill
I think you know what it’s going to take, unfortunately.
I am even irritated by that everyone acts like a gentleman.
They even open doors for me! Just go in and do not wait for me to open a door, I am a fucking man, I can open the door for myself! And when I do not say thank you they look at me like I have killed their puppy.
Being gentleman is a waste of time and annoying. I only act like this where I am with women who I like. (friends, lovers etc…)
People should hold the door open for you, you are a king, their natural superior.
I’d just ignore them as underlings are ignored by rulers.
Why be self-conscious or take it as an insult when the beta’s naturally take their natural place in the order of things and seek to serve you ?
90% plus of the population were made to be ruled, they crave subjugation, don’t get upset at them for following their genetic imperative.
They don’t mean to insult you, they just automatically perceive you as their superior.
I used to work with a former ‘Nam sniper with 54 confirmed kills (he became an art director in an ad agency). Every time I would use the word “sorry”, he would respond with “yeah, you’re sorry alright”. I’ve rarely used the word since.
For number one; what if you’re Canadian?
“Never complain, never explain.” -Henry Ford II
Just be like Eddie here http://youtu.be/2fYGnpA3RQI
Sorry I’m a misogynist and will not hold the door for your fat ass any more.
You are just so ugly and take up too much space, plus you stink, you’re useless for sex, and can’t even cook.
Stop asking your woman for permission to go out or hang out with your friends. You’re a grown ass man for god’s sakes. You don’t need her permission to do anything. Know the difference between “checking-in” which is common courtesy and “asking for permission” which is a bitch move.
http://www.mensanity.com/logical-advice-for-men-new-post-monday/2014/2/21/kd5luqcpbffq1tw6seaebwrce56z1p#.UzC7p9xN1uY
Hmm. I agree with your point of stop explaining. IN fact the more you explain the more you get in trouble with a girl because no matter what you say it will only piss her off more. Hence short explanations are best involving one word and let her wonder and think.
But it just seems kind of low to me that someone in business is bluring this line with dating and not giving customers a good explanation for why they are changing something. I think that is kind of crossing a line.
There’s a classic scene in Goodfellas where after the Lufthansa heist, the mobsters have a party and the primitive wiseguys come dressed in new suits and fancy cars disobeying the order from the chief to keep low so the cops don’t notice. One of the guys apologizes and tries to explain himself and the head mobster goes nuts and yells at him. After the yelling stops, the guy tries apologizing again and gets yelled at more. This happens about 4 more times. It’s hilarious and painful to watch at the same time.
Great reading as well is Hints for Lovers,, link below,,,
http://www.gutenberg.org/cache/epub/14255/pg14255.html
Let not the simpleton think a woman will sympathize with his simplicity:
No woman is a simpleton.
What women admire is a subtle combination of forcefulness and gentleness.
From Hints…
. For
Women prefer an despot to a dependent.
Just an interesting thought through all this intelligent discussion. Isn’t it funny that weak individuals are called pussies, slang for vagina, when vaginas can push a watermelon sized baby head through them? And strong or brave individuals are said to ‘have balls’ even though balls are incredibly sensitive things even when lightly tapped?
Just an interesting thought through all this intelligent discussion. It’s it funny how weak individuals are called ‘pussies’, slang for vagina, when a vagina can push a watermelon sized baby through it, but strong individuals are said to ‘have balls’ even though they are very sensitive things even when lightly tapped?
Just an interesting thought through all this intelligent discussion. It’s it funny how weak individuals are called ‘pussies’, slang for vagina, when a vagina can push a watermelon sized baby through it, but strong individuals are said to ‘have balls’ even though they are very sensitive things even when lightly tapped? -.-
Let’s see where this goes.
Yeah we all know the Betty White quote. Who cares, it’s irrelevant.
God, women.
I like the “Stop explaining yourself” thing. I explain myself, once, just in case I’ve been unclear. Sometimes we rush through something without painting a clear picture. And if I know for sure I have painted a clear picture, I don’t bother.
After that, what you wind up doing is validating someone else’s desire to keep arguing. And, in fact, the more you explain yourself, the more you wind giving the impression that your own reasons are weak and need justification or rationalization. You project the image of weakness.
Quite often the best thing to do is to state your reasons once, and refuse to back down. Then give the other person time to think on what you said on their own. Time to process and evaluate your words. It’s your confidence and refusal to keep restating your case that will cause them to wonder at their own conclusions. If you keep defending yourself, you wind up broadcasting the impression your own position is full of holes.
Today my wife said that I wasn’t the worst husband in the world. I was shocked and told her so. But really, who gives a shit what she thinks?
I’m always saying to the “sorry” men “Don’t be”. ” if they keep saying it… I usually say “I find it offence that u are saying sorry all the time. ” it usually shuts them up where they find it so hard to not say it again! GROW SOME FUCKING BALLS BETAS!!!
Good advice, thanks for the article!
You turned down money? What’s that like? That’s not a thing, for… anyone I can think of. As I read you you’re working for yourself, as am I, and while I can understand the want to not get up and get that cash, I cannot justify it. Seriously, as a lesson to the men who may read this, never… ever take sleep, family, sex, even mental health over getting paid for what you do. EVER!! That advice is destructive, debilitating, and fucked up. But it’s the only way forward.
I agree wholeheartedly with everything on this website and would like to become an alpa. But I’m a paraplegic and use a wheelchair…do you think it’s still possible though?
Don’t ask too many questions.
Making statements is more alpha than always asking questions.
Good article I’m from Canada so this could be a tough one but I have to improve on the apologizing I do over explain things a little not as much I rarely complain anymore.
this whole place is a festering pile of horse shit. I am so sorry you all have the misfortune of dealing with women. One question, if you hate women so much, why do you still want to have sex with them?
Because we don’t hate them.
Well, that was easy!
You lot really are a bunch of repressed homosexual felcher shitty dick lickers. I can’t see you but I’d bet you’re all rather ugly cunts.
Regarding the point of apologizing, take example from the slimy politicians for once, they sure know how to soothe butthurtedness without ever actually stating that they did wrong or they are sorry for something.
“Mistakes have been made”, “Yes, this was unfortunate”, “I’m deeply troubled and concerned for what has happened”, “That is unacceptable, something needs to be changed”, “I assure you, my responsibility is to correct this error” etc etc. all basically say “well, something was fucked up, but hey I’m not apologizing cause it wasn’t me personally responsible!”. Or go the playful route and just say “Woops”
*making a neggy remark about some girl* “Hey, that’s my good friend that you just insulted!” “Woops, happens”
“You stepped on my foot!” “Woops, didn’t even see it”
“What you just said is pretty offensive, you know?” “Woops, who knew?”
“I told you to tell me when you were about to cum, I nearly choked!” “Woops!”
Another good reason not to constantly apologize for every minute thing is once something really big happened that warrants an apology and you just calmly and truthfully apologize, your apology has some sincerity and weight behind it.
Great point.
I’m curious to know how all you would feel if a woman were to have all these characteristics of an alpha male. Basically an “alpha female”. Would she be seen as less attractive or not at all attractive? Would feel she was your equal or would feel the need to one up her?
There is a place for apology, explanation and even complaint. Just to a lesser degree. It’s when they are used as defense mechanisms that your conversational skills need expansion.
Sorry and an explanation can do a lot if you were in the, perceivable, wrong.
Don’t let pride dictate your actions. I’m sure this guy’s friends really felt they deserved some explanation and apology at times. Don’t be that guy. Be your own guy. Don’t be a bitch, but not at the expense of bein a self absorbed cunt.
Stop being afraid of her. Women idle at angry. Let her but don’t respond