Through The Looking Glass

My first year of law school I was paired up with a mentor. His name was Jeff, a very nice guy actually and we kept in contact with each other throughout the years. Fast forward to today and our lives are very, very different.

You see Jeff ended up marrying a girl who happened to be very rich, attractive and nice. They now have several kids, live in a palatial estate in a well-to-do suburb of Chicago and partake in a traditional life where he works and she stay home with the kids. I’m far from the family lifestyle as you know.

Every so often I have some work out in Chicago and every time Jeff would invite me to stay at his house. And every time I would decline, opting for a hotel to either do some light gaming while traveling for work, or just relaxing and enjoying some alone time.

A few weeks ago I had to be in Chicago again and like clockwork I got the invitation from Jeff again. Except this time I accepted it.

Why I Accepted

I enjoy my lifestyle. There is always room for improvement but I am generally content overall. But that doesn’t stop me from both hearing externally from numerous people about how what I’m doing is wrong (remaining single, traveling all the time, not having “roots”) and once in a while questioning myself about the same thing — which I view as healthy. I don’t want to just pull a blanket over my head and blindly assume all my decisions are correct.

So I wanted to see what life was like for someone that not only got married, but got married to an attractive girl who was rich, traditional and extremely nice. I wanted to see if this would also make me happy, to have chosen a path that most would consider a high standard of familial life.

On The Surface

Let’s get the main observable negative out of the way immediately — his wife is now fat. Granted she’s been pregnant for a large portion of the past decade (6 kids), but I’ve seen enough thin girls during pregnancy that I don’t buy that excuse. She does now take boot camp classes multiple times a week however since finishing up her last pregnancy, so there is that. Putting that admittedly large negative aside, she is still extremely nice (as far as I can tell), takes care of the kids and cooks elaborate and delicious meals from scratch.

Back to the other easily observable positives in Jeff’s life. He lives on a 15+ acre estate. There are so many rooms here I’ve gotten lost trying to find my bedroom multiple times. There’s close to a million dollars worth of cars in his driveway, which itself is so long you can’t see the main road from the house. He has two live-in housekeepers. As easily as your friends would offer you a Bud Light he offers me glasses of Blue Label (which I gladly accepted). Basically, money is of no concern.

Even his kids are amazing and I don’t even like kids. Granted they are still kids so there were a few crying incidents, but overall they are insanely well-behaved. More than that they are all good-looking and extremely smart. I had a conversation with his 3-year old girl that was more substantive than some dates I’ve been on. If I ever have kids his would be the ideal I would strive for.

But On The Inside…

He was a dead man. At dinner one night I watched him as he held his youngest son, an infant, and for minutes on end he would just stare into space with empty eyes. You can tell when someone is looking off to the side thinking about something. This was not it. It was a robotic, dead gaze.

One of the mornings on his way to work his wife innocuously asked him about a bill and whether it was paid. He snapped at her in an angry voice that seemed to be unwarranted and something that happens after months of being passive-aggressive. Healthy minds don’t react like this.

Random family and friends showed up during my few days there and everyone was having a great time besides him. I felt bad. Here is a guy who will never have to worry about money in his life, has probably the best kids a person could ever ask for, and aside from his wife’s weight gain which will hopefully be reversed with the start of a new exercise regimen, she still is nice and very traditional. Yet he is the unhappiest person I’ve interacted with in a while.

My Thoughts

I’m very happy I finally accepted Jeff’s invitation. I had a chance to see what my life could have been like had I not only veered down a traditional path, but one that at least superficially is about as ideal as one can ask for.

It would be an absolute lie for me to say that I’m 100% certain that my chosen lifestyle is the right one. I believe it is but I keep an open mind and welcome thoughts to the contrary. When people ask me about my lifestyle, I tell them about it but don’t preach it because everyone is different.

And while I realize one example does not make a rule, there is no escaping a few undeniable truths. If I really wanted to just get up and go to Europe for a month, I could. In a few weeks I’d arrange for work to be taken care of, sublet my place out and off I go. Jeff has six young kids and a wife — it’s highly doubtful he can even escape for one evening let alone a month.

For some having a Bentley in your driveway makes you happy. For others like myself, it’s freedom. Having a coffee in a random Siberian cafe puts a smile on my face. One probably much larger than any Jeff has had for a while.

Read Next: A Tale Of Two Men

199 thoughts on “Through The Looking Glass”

    1. Yeah, it can’t be assumed that being married with kids is the automatic cause in this case. If the wife is doing self improvement, is nice and traditional in the old sense, the kids are great and well adjusted, then what’s to be sad about? It could be anything. Maybe he just helped some dirtbag criminal type get off of a jail sentence when deep down he knew the creep had “done it”, that’s soul destroying (for example). I’ve met single men who were miserable, even the ones who do well with women. You can’t assume it’s the single/married status right off the bat lacking further clues. When the clues all point to “but, he has a great life with great people” then I’d probably start investigating other reasons.

      1. It also could be as simple as there was something he really wanted to do in his life, that he never got around to doing and is suffering regrets.

        1. The real take away is that the traditional indicators of “success” don’t necessarily mean that you’re happy. There’s a reason that the grungy, dirty, poverty line type 1%ers I know are happier people than any of the career “climb the ladder” corporate type officers I knew in the service.

  1. I am in this very same situation, except my home is much more modest and my homeschooler submissive Christian wife hasn’t been fat despite 5 kids in 10 years- perhaps due to being a marathon runner. I don’t care to travel the world and I bought my own espresso maker. My joy in life is to impregnate my woman and then teach my children The Truth and The Way. And a little range time. Don’t forget the diesel either. Oh, and espresso.

    1. And ironically, my sister visits us often, and thinks my wife and I “don’t talk.” That’s because my sister told me I am no longer allowed to evangelize her, and she’s been dabbling in witchcraft. So I just don’t talk much at all when she’s over. So she only sees a little bit of our relationship and concludes “we don’t talk; he just goes to bed.”
      So be careful what you assume. Every once in a while I do come home and proverbially kick the dog, but I wouldn’t say that I am in an unhealthy mental state all the time. And I have been too harsh with her, even in front of her mom, but I usually apologize to her and anyone who witnessed it if I am truly unduly harsh.
      Just meeting your conjecture with my own here. Thanks for listening.

      1. The correct response here is “This is MY house and while in my house I will speak to you as I please.” Stand up to your sister-in-law and ignite tingles in the wife at the same time.

  2. I think your missing the real reason he has a shitty life. It’s because he chose to be a lawyer. Men’s need to create something to build. Lawyers mostly destroy things, not all but most.

    1. Ain’t that the truth … I spent almost 10 years as a corporate lawyer … I think someone once said that being a lawyer manages to turn you into a pussy and an asshole at the same time …

      1. Wait, so lawyers aren’t dicks, pussies, AND assholes all at the same time? Might as well go for the trifecta.

    2. I did some pretty extensive research on the profession back when I was figuring out my military exit strategy.
      They did some studies on that in regard to law. The result was that lawyers who are employed at a large corporation or a major firm tend to make a lot of money, but have a very low level of happiness and career satisfcation. Laywers who “hang a shingle” and work independently make significantly less money(but still a very comfortable income), and tend to have a very high level of career satisfaction and overall happiness.
      Working in corporate America really is a soul-sucking endeaver.
      (and ironically, feminists seem to think being a corporate slave is “empowering”)

    3. Do you really believe the bullshit this Dogger writes? Naive little blanket boys. This loser dropped out of PRE law at college in freshman year and has been a bum ever since.
      That house looks like a cottage on my estate where I allow the servants to live. Besides, it’s stock pic taken from the MLS haha
      Yeah, go drink some crappy coffee in “Siberia” aka as the crappy ‘hood where you live in mommy cellar.
      You’re a lawyer? Fine, I’ll turn on my private chat server and publish the current IP and port address and invite everyone here to join and will ask you a few legal questions in real time where you can’t run and look up the answers and we’ll see what’s what. If you can’t answer within 2 seconds then you’re a fake.

        1. Are you always here, numbnuts?
          It’s probably Roosh lol In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if Roosh writes all of these articles. He’s like Peter Sellers in Lolita where he plays all the roles.

      1. Hold the fuck up!
        People ARE who they say they are on the internet?
        HMM……Well slap me silly and stick a dick up my ass!

      2. Beaver = Jealous woman typing from her shitty apartment full of cats

      3. ^award for stupidest fucking comment in the history of RoK, and that is really saying something
        Her dildo must be stuck in, better get a tow truck and winch it out of there.

    4. Quote: “Men’s need to create something to build. Lawyers mostly destroy things, not all but most”
      Lawyers make money off of petty disputes, as well as divorce and fabricated accusations and frivolous lawsuits. In America you literally do not need a valid reason to sue someone. With of course the rare exceptions (Law Dogger being among them), most lawyers are parasites and make money off of human misery, and laughing all the way to the bank. We desperately need tort reform but thats not happening as long as there is a monetary profit to be had in the “law business”
      If we finally come to civil war, the first group to be in the crosshairs should be lawyers.

    5. It’s the dilemma of all men… doing what you want to do, verses doing what is expected of you.
      this guy has done what is expected of him, by his parents, his wife, his wife’s parents, his bosses / business partners, his clients, his friends, his peers etc. etc. etc.
      he has lived and built a life based around what he was told would make him happy – instead of doing what really inspired him.
      i expect if you visit David Guetta’s house… he has a loving wife and four kids, you would find a very different situation….. as you would with any professional who is doing what he loves day in day out.
      take a look at Carl Cox behind the decks… the guy has a networth of some $15M – he’s been DJing underground techno since mid 80s, he has never sold out AT ALL….. he’s made decent money, not huge because for sure he could have sold out, but he does only what he loves.
      who would have thought that playing underground techno music, day in day out could make you such a nice living…..
      that’s the difference between a person doing what they love and doing what is expected of them.

  3. Every person has their personal desires. I have zero desire to have children, ever. My brother, he married and has 4 rugrats. I enjoy the ability to light out whenever I feel like it. My little brother likes to go out to the garage and tinker with stuff
    Your friend may have money, but he may not have found what makes him truly happy. Or maybe he can’t have what makes him happy anymore, kids do that. My brother used to enjoy many other things, but today he doesn’t do them nearly as much. He does take pride that, like us, his oldest is probably a better welder at the age of 9 than most people ever will be. They built a go-kart together, strapped on a Tecumseh 8HP snowblower engine, and tooled around, tearing up the grass a little (to the chagrin of his wife) as the prize.
    I hope your friend has a reality he can come to accept. Money doesn’t necessarily buy happiness, but it does make it easier to find more often than not.

    1. What makes a man “truly happy” is knowing that life doesn’t give a shit about happiness in the slightest, nor does your creator, nor should you. Happiness is not a goal, it is a side effect that may or may not come with finding the narrow gate and staying off the wide road to destruction. (Matt 7:13) In this Way, a man can be “happy” even in the midst of great trial and suffering. What a man needs is inner peace that comes from knowing the Way, the Truth, and the Life. Shalom.

      1. Suit yourself. I couldn’t give a shit less about ‘God’ (same with my brother) in any case. Any slave religion carries, within it, the seeds of it’s own destruction. One that is based off of another slave religion, doubly so. Still, if that’s what makes you happy then go for it. You’ll find other like-minded men to indulge that pastime with.
        Happiness (often) is what people have when they feel like they have accomplished something. My brother likes to build physical things, or rebuild them. I like working with technology. He’s more of a homebody, I’m a traveler. What I’m getting at is that people are different, and thus what makes them happy is different. I could never be happy in my brother’s life situation, I’d go stir crazy. He’d never be happy in mine, he’d constantly be longing for home. Law Dogger’s friend has something missing.
        Even when men are different, they find other (like-minded) men to mingle with and be men. My brother has a group of friends that like to tinker in some fashion. They’re all slightly different, but they have commonality in their ‘hobby’ of tinkering with things. I have a friend who is a billards player. He and his buddies go to the billiard club and indulge in their hobby.
        Law Dogger’s friend might need just that: time to be a man with others like him. Men who do something that men do together, whether it’s sports, fixing an old car, flying, cards, et al., it doesn’t matter. As long as, at the end of the activity, he feels like he accomplished something worthy of manhood.
        My friend, after his first solo flight, was smiling from ear to ear (I got the picture the instructor took, and gave him a large print of it on his birthday) leaning against the plane. You know the look, the cat that got the canary? He knew he just did something that so few other people ever do, but not for that reason. He didn’t do it because so many others don’t, that was irrelevant. He did it because he could. He worked hard to learn how to fly safely, and his instructor (a man) trusted him enough with a $200k dollar plane that he said: ‘Go fly.’

  4. I am somewhat similar to lawdogger’s friend: married to a beautiful wife (though marriage with many attendant troubles), 2 healthy/happy teenage sons, successful (own a growing business). I am also the beta-schlub husband and now at the age of 47 trying to re-form my life per red pill – if possible.
    The blank stare – check. The unnecessarily angry response – check. The distraction – check. The concealed regrets – check.
    How then to raise the sons?
    One son is great looking and naturally very alpha. My red-pill nudges are warmly received and he’s on his way to a life of independence and adventure.
    The other is more naturally beta – though showing positive signs. Dumped a girlfriend that was too controlling and manipulative. Starting to respond to my urging to expand horizons.
    Really want them both to travel the world and find non-feminist women/culture from which to pick.
    Trying to minimize their contact with beta-izers of the world – haggard/liberal girlfriend mommas, passive men, mangina/idiot friends. And trying to increase exposure to real men – thankfully I see them regularly coming through my business. At least my sons see me operating my own domain in my own business and that I am independent enough not to over-socialize with other beta-schlubs.
    If only the red pill internet existed 20 years ago.

      1. Surely there are many late red-pillers lurking here. Those of us married to 2d wave feminists – but didn’t know what we were getting into – trying to properly mold our children in an even more hostile society. No doubt there is a place for red-pill fatherhood – I truly enjoy the company of my sons as much as any military or business entity I have ever joined. Should they not be the real standard-bearers of the red-pill idea – and hopefully a structured rebuild of what is left of western society? Not ready to give up on the idea of a useful marriage yet.

        1. God, yes. I didn’t find the red pill until my fifties, after the end of a sixteen-year marriage in which I was the classic beta pedastalizing providor good guy. Recovery is difficult and slow but every step is a revelation. My son is also a natural and it hasn’t taken much for him to see the errors of my ways. The daughters, on the other hand…

        2. I’m finding it interesting that most of the men here (at least on this post) are finding the red pill as a reaction to failed marriages and break ups with girlfriends. Ideally, this shouldn’t be a reactive situation, and it makes it look like the red-pill is a crutch to keep you from spiraling into depression, and not a life-changing realization.

        3. Agreed Diogenes. Which is why we need to TRAIN OUR SONS to this realization instead of wallowing in regret.

        4. The culture, the media, all authority figures in their life, and those they love and trust the most have been lying to them their whole life. Now you come along and say they should just get the red pill on their own. I got the red pill before the age of the internet and I got it the usual way; applied as a suppository by the divorce courts. Until you are slammed by the system you tend to believe that the system is there for you. Why would you not believe since that is what everyone has been telling you? I think black guys have at least this one thing going for them; they are told early on that the man is out to get them. White boys are told the man has his back.
          Remember that the red pill is just reality, and reality is merely a crutch for those that can’t face hard drugs.

        5. Girls are the victims of a great deal of sociological (negative) pressure that I imagine most guys can’t fully comprehend or appreciate. The betrayal of a mother who slut-shames her daughter having managed to convince herself it’s for her daughter’s sake (as they all do when the truth is, it’s their own fear of disapproval from Society’s whores driving their actions) is an incredibly bitter pill for girls to ever be expected to swallow.
          If you look at how Amanda Todd was treated, or how Miley Cyrus is being screamed at by ‘concerned’ feminists who want to protect her from herself, you can start to get an idea of the kind of internal conflict girls face trying to reconcile biological desire with sociological fear and shame.

    1. Man, I’ve been there — recently too.
      My daughter took off like a rocket and has been on her own since age 18.
      My son go the mamma’s boy treatment from his mom. I didn’t find the red pill until it was a little late (around 14 years old) to start teaching him how things really are.
      I’m really concerned that he’s a bit beta still. Now that he’s turning 18 soon, I’ve really got a lot to content with. He’s living with his mom in his grandmothers house (she’s unwilling to work to support herself or my son) and is getting a double whammy of female influence. I get to interject red pill alpha values a minority of the time. At least I homeschooled him earlier on and prevented him from complete indoctrination by the schools system and PC/feminist culture.
      He’s gotten a “girlfriend,” despite my stern warning not to get attached to any American girl, has a crappy part-time jobs (was great when he was 15, not so much at 18), and thinks he has all the time in the world to figure out who he wants to be and what he wants to do with this life (sounds like his mother).
      The only solution I’ve come up with is to literally move him out of the country indefinitely to “study abroad,” by studying broads in different cultures and in different languages. I’ve narrowed down the choices to Central America to parts of SE Asia.
      If he stays here, he’s going to rot away with most of his friends who seem to be completely lost in this entitled age. Worse, he’ll get really serious about this girl or another and weld his shackles to the floor of this cesspool. I showed him Tokyo and he got the memo. But he still needs to read the MGTOW Manifesto and start writing his own chapters of his own book filled with adventures of his own life based on his own choices.
      Unplug and uproot is my solution.

      1. Yup. Just as I suspected. His little girlfriend turns out to a manic depressive. I course, I told him the second I saw her lip piercings on her Facebok page she had problems. And, she makes poor decisions.
        Of course, her parents LOVE my well mannered, stable, accomplished boy because. He’s a rock for their emotionally unstable princess.
        I told him to dump this black hole of time and energy. He’s got options and it’s time to exercise them. Anymore time on this basket case is wasted time. Yeah, I didn’t sugarcoat it either.

  5. We have no insight on what’s making him completely unhappy. He may be massively leveraged on investments or in his company and about to go bankrupt. He may have just been told he’ll never make senior partner at his firm. The list goes on.
    We do know he’s got all the material possessions. You say his kids are fantastic, and apart from his wife’s weight, she’s checking all the boxes on domestic duties and attitude. That’s rare.
    It sounds like your friend may have failed to develop a personality. He was so bent on achieving material success that he never took time to figure out the intangibles that drive his state of being.
    This is a good lesson to all of us. Before embarking on the race, look up and make sure you know what you’re working towards. If you’re measuring by someone else’s yardstick, you’ll never do what’s right for *you*.

    1. Hmmmmm things may not be as they seem on the surface Law Dogger.
      Remember Athlone MGinnis’ post a few days ago on fronting?
      Ask the right question and you will get a true but indirect answer:
      of the mornings on his way to work his wife innocuously asked him about
      a bill and whether it was paid. He snapped at her in an angry voice
      that seemed to be unwarranted…”
      Let’s hope your friend is not Stanley Johnson.

    2. He may have herpes despite having always been faithful. Fear of shame, pressure to conform, keep up appearances keeps a hell of a lot of injustice towards men concealed and suppressed.

  6. There are no nice women in western culture. They are all dream killers.
    Your friend’s wife may be rich, and your friend thus gets to be rich too, but you can be sure that he pays for it one way or another. Probably in multiple ways.
    The natural evolutionary impulse for a man is to roam. It is not to hunker down in a house, however large, under the thumb of one woman and “co-parenting” a gaggle of children.

    1. “The natural evolutionary impulse for a man is to roam. It is not to hunker down in a house, however large, under the thumb of one woman and “co-parenting” a gaggle of children.”
      That is a 100% correct core red-pill truth. Men are simply not designed to be chained to their mate and offspring for their entire existence. It is extremely unnatural and therefore extremely suffocating.
      A man’s natural desire to roam free is similar to a woman’s innate hypergamy. She may not understand her hypergamy, but if it remains unsatisfied she will have a nagging unhappiness throughout her entire life. The same goes with a man’s innate need to roam and be his own man. In the absence of this need being satisfied, he will remain eternally unhappy. It will always nag him.
      Has anyone ever really met a happily married man? I’ve met plenty of thoroughly defeated men who have resigned themselves to simply drudge through it for the rest of their lives. Not sure what kind of life that is?

      1. I’ve met a few. The thing that these men all have in common is that they don’t define themselves by their home life. They all have their own passions, interests, and outlets for that urge to roam that take them outside the home.
        Look at Jefferson. He’s happily married, but that also isn’t the extent of his life. Like an serious rider he gets out and cruises the country from time to time.

      2. That’s why I’ve always believed the ideal life for a man would be the life of a sea captain, to have a devoted wife who was the mother of your children who stayed at home, while enjoying the carnal delights of flings with beautiful women abroad as you were on adventures. Most men want the best of both worlds, sadly most men now don’t get the best of even one of those worlds.

        1. And, to paraphrase the song in Blues Brothers, who’s at home banging your old lady while you’re out making love?

        2. BTW that is based on a career in the US Navy and seeing what goes on. The guys may get laid occasionaly, but the wives are getting laid like tile.

      3. I know only one. Only one. A true alpha, not the kind of PUA definition. The high class kind of man that other quality men want to be friends with and women wish was their husband. Guy does exactly what he wants and the family comes along for the ride. Wife is the primary income earner and he does whatever he wants, whenever he wants. 6’3 240 modelled as a teen and now is a coach. He could replace her in a hour, she could not replace him physically under any circumstance. She could however, snag a high income above average looking dude her own age in an hour.

        1. Nonsense, and science has backed this up. Monogamy is a whore lie. Women are biologically coded to fuck, as often and with as many guys as they can. From an evolutionary biology perspective, nothing else could make sense.
          Women’s lies and logic about monogamy andpaternity are so ridiculous, I cannot help but feel pity for any fool who has fallen for Society’s retarded rhetoric.

      4. What you fail to understand is that the inherent nature of hypergamy is that it can never be satisfied. Therefore women all (or all except the smallest sliver of 1%) go through life naggingly unhappy. Any man that thinks he can keep a woman happy is an idiot.

    2. I am certain that paternity, monogamy and marriage are Matriarchal constructs. Women are supposed to die to protect / care for their young. Men are coded to protect and assist all children.
      I have seen the biggest, roughest, meanest-looking biker turn into a teddy bear when a cute child asked for his help. He had been angry about something as well, and the transformation from fierce to gentle was something biological, instinctual, protective. I was thinking, “I would not want to be someone bothering that little girl right now” and then I felt nauseous because…
      The infantilization of women, something which had bothered me on some level since high school, suddenly made sense.

  7. He probably shouldn’t have had so many kids. If he’d have just had two instead of 6, his wife’s body would not have been as traumatized, and he himself would probably be less run down, with the terrible twos just confined to a few years.

    1. Fertile women don’t really function well unless either pregnant or nursing. It’s not a natural state for them, which leads them to start looking for guys less likely to be shooting blanks.
      Perhaps the happiest married (non plig) man I know of, has > 20 kids. 14 obtained the traditional way, before his wife was told “no more or you’ll die for sure” by the doctor. Then they started adopting….. CPS has tried to inject themselves on several occasions (healthy blond kids fetch big bucks as fashion accessories for barren career whores), but even his 4 year olds are taught well enough to know those particular professional pedophiles, are nothing but the spawn of Satan; and know full and well they are better off dead than captured.
      When there was some doubt his wife wold live much longer (she’s OK again now from what I gather) he visited me in LA, on his way to take the family to Disney Land out of all places. Rolling up the driveway in a 1960s era Tourbus from Yosemite or some other national park. Turning my ‘burbs home into a veritable gypsy camp, or perhaps scene from a Steinbeck novel: Boyscout style camp kitchen, some kids making juice from fruits brought from their own farm, while others helped mommy turn my kitchen into a commercial bakery, with a 24 hr supply of fresh baked goods and it’s attendant aromas.
      While he may not be able to hop-skip to Europe on a moment’s notice without disappointing an awful lot of kin he holds dear, at the same time, there isn’t much Europe has to offer that trumps watching your 12 year old daughter fix up her 10 year old brother, after he takes a fall from a tree; while your 9 and 11 year olds finish up a box of lunch from your own garden and kitchen for you, to make sure you are well fed while spending a few hours at the range……..

      1. i’m sure they paint a pretty picture for the eyes of on-lookers, but dig a bit and i’m sure you will find a fair share of maladaptations and assorted psychoses in their noggins. no way that shitting out 20 kids is not sign of some mental illness (regardless if DSM shit or just plain religion). i just can’t fathom a man being happy with having that many kids and that many responsibilities, he must simply be living on autopilot hoping to die soon and be rid of all those chores.

  8. He’s probably just stagnant. Happiness is ever fleeting, and if you stay in one place for too long whatever happiness that place originally granted you will dwindle. I’m sure his wife, his professional and financial success, and his children all have given him immeasurable joy at many points in his life, but those things are bound to fade. He needs new goals, new stimulation, etc. This could be as simple as picking up a new hobby to be passionate about. Maybe he chose to sacrifice personal pleasure for the sake of his family.
    Having a lot of responsibility as Jeff does certainly limits some options as you have to compromise. Being completely free of the responsibilities of fatherhood or marriage definitely rewards you with many more resources to devote to just yourself and your own solitary endeavors.

  9. Good article. There is usually a common theme among men who are married with children; they are unhappy. Of course this depends on the individual, but most if not all married people are pretty miserable. And here’s why:
    They have no freedom or privacy to be themselves and do what they want. This is the commonality that married people share, both men and women. In my short time on Earth I have learned one important thing: personal freedom is the key that unlocks any chance at even being happy. Happiness is a fleeting and elusive thing, but it can rarely ever be attained without some measure of freedom to do what one wants or feels they want to do. Usually only a monk has the inner fortitude to find happiness and peace while being imprisoned. Most men are not monks. When a person is locked into a ‘stable’ situation such as marriage, they are still LOCKED into it. They go to their 9 to 5 job day in and day out, and the days of their life just seem to bleed into one, long pointless day. Nothing ever changes. Same wife, same job, same kids, same problems.
    Money is the key to happiness because money is a means of freedom, What is the point of having lots of money when you are trapped with the same woman? What is the point of owning a nice sports car when you are married with children? Part of owning a nice car is to leverage it to pick up chicks. Cheesy, I know, but it still works to this day. Guys that drive expensive sports cars have appeal to lots of chicks. Are you really gonna want to pay for a Ferrari when you still have to come home to an overweight wife? What’s the point? Might as well drive a ’95 Toyota Camry.

      1. More specifically I would say that Money + Freedom = the best situation possible for achieving happiness or personal contentment.
        The paradox here is how does the average man go about earning money without sacrificing too much freedom?
        I would say for the average man, the wrong strategy would be to haphazardly marry a woman and have children without carefully thinking about the consequences. I think younger guys have a youthful tendency to think that things will just work themselves out, and that together with your lovely new wife over time things will just improve. Usually they don’t. More often than not things stagnate, then go into a horrible downward spiral.
        Wife, Mortgage, soul-sucking job, expensive children…these are all the enemy of the average man’s freedom and happiness. Just because a few good guys are or claim to be happily married and fulfilled by their children, doesn’t mean that the average man will come close to being happy taking on these responsibilities. Once you pull that cat out of the bag, you can never put it back in.
        Take caution, lads. I’ve seen it all go bad many times over for good guys I know who try to “have it all.”

        1. Most wives won’t help with that. The majority of women have an instinct to “nest” and settle in one place. It’s the rare woman who has a risk tolerance on par with your average Alpha male.

    1. That’s the typical view from the outside. Were you ever married?
      The “no sportscar” thing only lasts a short while, hell dude, I owned a beautiful white Corvette well into the early years of my second child and sold it mostly because I needed room in the garage for my motorcycle (what…gasp…and you have kids and a motorcycle?!?). If you have a *healthy* marriage then YOU are in control of it through and through, and she is your second in command. You act, she follows.
      The reason modern men look as they do is because they do not realize this and have been actively taught to act the opposite. It’s all dependent on YOUR frame though. YOU make it a paradise, or let it turn into a living hell by making her/the family your entire identity. Just like anything else in life.
      Agree on money, btw.

      1. To be fair Ghost, relationships like that are the norm for biker types. Most of us attract submissive and supportive wives.

        1. Yeah, that’s true. Maybe guys trying to learn alpha could profit from watching natural alphas in their lives and habitats. As you said, real life beats reading a book on how to “be alpha” hands down.
          Hey, men, maybe that’s an assignment for you. Go spend some time hanging around with bikers, or other natural real life alpha types, and take notes in your head on how they act and react around women. Get out of “theory” on the internet and see it in real life.

        2. That’s potentially bad advice. I’d say go and OBSERVE those types……but keep your mouth shut until they introduce themselves to you.

        3. Heh, I didn’t mean go talking, yeah, just observe. Was not clear at all on that. Hitting a normal bike night at some popular joint in the summer and you can stand and simply watch the actions/interactions and not have to say “boo” to a single person there.

        1. Working on a contract job where I’m paid a lot to do very little and I’m bored as shit. I came here at the behest of real life people mentioning this “manosphere” to me last summer. Was just curious, mainly. You up and coming men need guidance outside of theories written by bloggers, so I figure, why not lend a hand?

        2. As a med student I’ve seen countless ppl injured jn motorcycle accidents. Very irresponsible of u to endanger ur life When u have kids. We don’t need ur advice here

        3. Yeah, he’s a real Son of Anarchy lol I watched a few episodes of that show and could never figure out with all the gun and drug running, porn making and whorhouses they still looked all poor and like they didn’t have a pot to piss in lol And the wives and girlfriends had faces that could stop a train. The one who because a doctor, and not just any doctor but a paediatric surgeon comes back to this crap town just to be with mullet head her long lost HS sweetheart. Yeah, that’s believable. And then she has a kid but still has to take care of mullet head’s other kid that he had with some whore junkie. Mullet head makes Jesse Pinkman look like a genius.

        4. Then you don’t live in an area where mobsters ride Harleys. Not saying they aren’t trash but they do have groupies.

        5. You’re an artist.
          A bullshit artist.
          Now get back in your rat-hole cellar pyjama boy.

        6. Medstudent must be a chick in real life, searching for a sugar daddy to pay her tuition.
          I should know, a campus slut nearly got me duped into paying her tuition bills I did NOT study for.

    2. The secret to my happy marriage is the unity we have in Christ, and the solidarity we share in rejecting the worldly desires for freedumb, social status,personal identity, privacy, and eternal youth.

      1. Yeah, I feel happy rejecting privacy and my own identity. That’s why Jesus resides in the NSA and big government, right?

        1. You have no identity. Without the Truth in your life, you are a talking sack of meat. An organic robot. A cloud of particles. That’s it.
          Privacy was not mentioned in the context of the NSA or human rights. It was mentioned in the context of parents whining about losing their childish notions upon become responsible adults.

      2. You are a slave to a Bronze Age bedtime story.
        Your christ was the biggest faggot beta-bitch to never live.If I’m ever in the market for an invisible best friend I’ll go find Thor or Dionysus.

        1. You’re exactly the reason why Western Civilization is in decline with your piss poor attitude.

        2. Jesus probably did exist but he wasn’t the gentle pussy he’s portrayed as in the NT (written by jews). He was actually trying to form his own kingdom but was murdered by a jew assassin hired by the rabbis who he was also trying to knock out of power. I doubt if he was crucified because the Romans hadn’t done that since the last Serville War a hundred years before and only to traitors. Criminals were either beheaded (if upper class) or hanged if common. The Cross btw is a jew symbol so whoever wrote this in the NT must have been confused or did it intentionally because Jesus was not a jew. Jesus came from Judah (Benjamin was the other tribe) that was sort of left over and still pure European. White Europeans occupied this area originally until the arrival of negro people into Egypt and the mid East after 1k BC who were used by the Philistines and Canaanite as servants and hired field hands. The leftover Israelites who didn’t go north with the 10 tribes that were evicted by the White Assyrians just lived in Canaan practised their hodgepodge Yahweh religion mixed into other cults of the area and began to breed with the Canaanites who had already been shagging the negroes for hundreds of years.Jesus hated these degenerate White Hebrews who were mixing and into idolatry and were now known as jews.Idolatry is not what most people think it is and at that time religions all sort of overlapped anyway. Idolatry was savage Negro practises of sacrificing infants, using daughters as whores to make money and possibly even cannibalism. Cannibalism as a Practise has never existed in any White culture. This is why Jesus called the jews and their forebears murderers and referred to them as Satanists (some negro god) btw, cannibalism was wiped out during the Euro colonial period in the 1800’s in Africa.(although I wouldn’t go too far into the bush even today) As recently as the 60’s one of the Rockefeller boys was killed and eaten in New Guinea while on an expedition. Probably got his head shrunk too as a trophy. I’ve seen one as a boy (it was a missionary) but in today’s PC world they’re probably hidden away somewhere.
          Anyway, Jesus was just a leader and had to speak in code because the jews were gunning for him.The Romans didn’t care because he was no threat to them or did they care if he took over from the jews because the jews were a pain in the arse and always causing problems.

    3. Not arguing with you – you may well be right. But I always kind of thought that the emphasis on personal freedom is one of the great destructive forces of the modern, western world. When you think of the constraints our forebears had: religious, those tied to gender, rigid caste/class (and economic) division, and so forth. Often one was born, lived and died in the same place and the narrow constraints set out for them before they were even born. With such lack of personal freedoms they should have been miserable. But were they? They had things we increasingly don’t – a real place in the world, community, the bonds of family (and not just nuclear)…
      Clearly some, like this author and you are happy with your freedoms (for now, anyway). But then there are the hoards suffering with feeling lost, meaningless, and isolated. We are a social animal and no responsibilities can also mean no meaningful connection. In fact, I see this as one of the reasons for RoK – men want to connect with women in a way that is meaningful but modern “freedoms” (particularly on the side of women) have meant that the plot has been lost. The freedoms we have fought for are increasingly meaning that we have nothing to offer each other besides superficial and ultimately meaningless and fruitless connection.

      1. Great comment. Same thing I wanted to say.
        I mean, if you are able to make bank and enjoy spending it, Law Dogger’s life is good. But not many people are like that.
        When you try to teach people that you need success, money, adventures, intelligence, notches, whatever to be “happy,” then the people who are not excellent enough to achieve these things end up feeling like failures, and they are miserable.
        It is no wonder that as the world industrialized 150 years ago and social class stratified more than ever 100 years ago, ideologies such as communism and populism came also as a response to protect and glorify the average man. Our ancestors knew that materialism and individualism would dominate the collective psyche, breaking down communities, leaving people anxious and always unfulfilled.
        The more distant ancestors probably imposed limits on castes, installed marriage and patriarchy, promoted religious/cultural identity to try to keep this one problem at bay. You give a man identity and a place in the world, and he always feels useful and dignified. You take a man’s culture, take away any guidance, take away the community, and the men who can’t measure up get roasted.

    4. No, money isn’t the key. They key is autonomy. Freedom is defined as who controls you. Your children are your legacy and that’s important to anyone who has a clue and is interested in propagating their genetic legacy… but spoogemieisters are gonna spoooge over anything with fake tits and a smile.
      Not being happy is a spiritual condition. Period. It has nothing to do with one’s circumstances. For the unwashed, it’s all about money, power, fame, assets, everything else… but happiness is the ability to go to sleep at the end of the day with peace. At the end of the day, younger tighter wetter pussy is not a substitute for the feeling of genuine accomplishment.
      If you think the feeling of a son, on your arrival to the home, screaming ‘Daddy’ and rushing toward you to give you a hug is not totally boss, you’ve never had kids or never participated in raising them. There is no feeling more enabling or empowering than that.

  10. If he only had 2 kids he’d be a lot happier and less worn-down, and his wife would be thinner.

  11. That’s just pure reflection. When someone speaks about the feelings of others, they usually speak about themselves.

  12. Man becomes a slave to his possessions. And for the man that has everything there is no end game. “This is it”. That on its own is soul-sucking. This is why when I meet a younger fellow who is dreaming of the trophy wife, the big house, garage full of fancy cars, and all that, I ask them “so, where did you get the idea that these are things to be pursued?”
    You see, a lot of people mindlessly pursue things. Why do people just go and brainlessly get married after they got the college done and career started? Who says it has to be this way?
    Mainstream media is good at guiding neural pathways such that these false constructs are taken for reality (“Matrix” – no kidding). The man in the story is a great cash cow, a battery, to keep the system going. He lives outside of Chicago, one of the worst tax areas and a victim disarmament zone for the most part, he probably pays out the nose in income taxes, and then pays out the nose in property taxes on that spread, and probably pays countless dollars in interest payments to various lending organizations.
    All for this… wait what do we call it… “The American Dream”.
    “Dream” is the only truth there. It’s just a dream, guided by interests that make big bucks on it.
    “Red Pill” should not be just about dating, women, and masculinity.

    1. What, no mention of the proletariat and the bourgeois? I’m disappointed.
      There’s nothing wrong with the accumulation of wealth and the enjoyment of life. What’s wrong is to not exercise those pleasures within the Aristotelian mean and with a solid foundation of virtue.

  13. I am currently working on life-style, that might combine both of the worlds of family and lone wolf travel that I love.
    My plan is to work for a month, then spend the next 2 months with girlfriend and potential future child and then on “business trips” and wolf-pack-travels – each episode life – family / lone wolf travel for 2 weeks each. I actually need to work one month out of 3 – hardcore-style – in order to cover all expenses. My girlfriend is open to it and accepts that I will never marry under the current legal system. She also accepts that I am a lone wolf kind of guy (while I meet other “lone wolfs” when travelling) and as long as I keep my travels to 2 weeks and then spend the next 2 weeks with her travelling it is actually quite envigorating for the relationship as well. During the intense work-month I live like a warrior-monk anyway.
    I have already tested that lifestyle in the last couple of months – so far quite fun and interesting!

    1. The day you have a child is the day you commit. No escape. All women change after the man commits. Women (like milk) almost never change for the better.

      1. That’s not true. My wife and I have been married for almost 20 yrs. 3 kids. She works out every day, takes care of herself.

        1. i’m sure your one lonesome example is totally relevant in the grand scheme of things.

    2. I did the Road Warrior/Lone Wolf thing for awhile when young. Got to see lots of places. I didn’t much mind it, as I’m constitutionally about as much of a social animal as Ted Kaczynski.
      What ended up giving me the creeps, was the lifers. Guys with 40 years of literally going sideways. Some of them were quite “accomplished” professionally. They had been everywhere, seen everything, screwed everyone, experienced all there was. But like a road movie, it was all just an endless string of scenes, connected by nothing more than chronology.

    3. She’s looking for a husband while u’re away. I’ve come to learn that a quality women usually look for marriage

      1. No – she is not.
        “Quality women” who look for marriage are either in love with the fairy wedding or are afraid financially (justly of unjustly). When the financial part is secure the white wedding party is not necessary for many women (though most want it anyway – which of course they can get, but not a binding contract – just a non-binding ceremony).
        Besides – over 90% of cock-carousel-riders with notch-counts into the tripe digits are looking for marriage. “Quality woman” is a fem-term. I am afraid the average man must be able to apply super-natural intuition via years of deep-meditation and direct perception of the consciousness. Then it is actually not that difficult. Detachment of the process also helps.
        Besides – I really don’t care if she wants another guy, which she certainly does not. Even if – I am all happy to get together with a woman younger and more beautiful or just play the field. I am content either way.

      2. Another point is that the marriage component is prevalent mainly in the US and some European countries (aside from Deveolping countries, but they have marriage 1.0 and not the bogus 2.0). In some Scandinavian countries more children are born outside of wedlock (i.e. Iceland). Also divorce laws are ridiculously easy and cheap and oh – really equal (i.e. Sweden). In the end I guess love and having a good LTR matters more than a piece of paper, a 100.000$ party and the 60% likelihood of a divorce war that will only enrich lawyers and the State (see Divorce Corp.).

  14. I love that. I’m 31 and single and I just decidedly am going to Costa Rica for a few days and I can’t decide if I want to got to Vegas for EVO or hold off and go to Panama for my b/day. Every time I think I’m lonely and thinking I want a g/f, I ask myself,” How much better off would I be with just having a chick minus the sex/” answer not much better if anything worst. I’m happy and content and love my current lifestyle at the moment. Thanks!

  15. Happiness is a cultural input there. Is there any such thing as happiness?
    I would say, no. So, the quest for happiness is a cultural input, and that is
    the common desire that we know exists everywhere, in every part of the world.
    That is what we all want, and that want is the most important want in human
    beings everywhere. Happiness, if you want to use that word, is like any other
    sensation. The moment thought separates itself from what is called the sensation
    of happiness, the demand to keep that sensation going longer than its natural
    duration also occurs with it. So, any sensation, however extraordinary, however
    pleasant it may be, is rejected by the body. Keeping that sensation going longer
    than its duration of life is destroying the sensitivity of the sensory
    perceptions and sensitivity of this living organism. That is the battle that is
    going on there. If you do not know what happiness is, you will never be

    1. You know, there are some men who cannot enjoy the taste of a fine wine but that the individual grapes keep getting in his way.
      Enjoy life, and enjoy happiness, accept them for being a transient pleasure, and consider that if you need to totally rationalize it away as non-existent then maybe you haven’t actually experienced it in the first place (no offense).
      If you do not know what happiness is, you will never be

      That’s just bitterness writ large.

      1. The reason why people can never be happy is the actual pursuit of happiness itself, which is why this article as I said before is just the author’s reflection of his own perceived (un)happiness.
        Happiness is just a sensation. All sensations are very short lived. They can’t last forever. If you think that you’ll be happy when you’re married, you will be but for a short while. So you keep looking for the evasive happiness and get divorced. Equally if you think that you’ll be happy single, you will be but for a short while. And so you marry and start a new vicious circle.
        There’s more to marriage than just committing to a woman. You marry to become one of the pinnacles of civilisation – the woman is just your tool, so to speak.
        All voices here advocating boycott of the marriage institution are wrong. We need to be the change we want to see in the world.
        Running away is for wimps and pick-up artists. LOL

        1. As a woman who looks for serious commitment, noticing that men boycotting marriage has made me extremely cautious. Personally I think Americas divorce rate is high, but factors like education should be considered. My parents’ white friends have all been married for More than 30yrs. No divorces. Most with graduate degrees.

    2. Happiness is what you believe it is.
      Maybe that’s a high stress 15 hour per day job
      Maybe its a Fat wife 4 kids
      Maybe that’s living for Geezus.
      Maybe that’s smoking crack under a bridge.

  16. Having a Bentley in you driveway doesn’t make anyone happy, not for longer than a few weeks. Then it’s in to the next obscene purchase. That’s the thing with your friend, money doesn’t buy happiness. I also wouldn’t underestimate how shitty he feels about his fat wife and her epically ruined vagina.

    1. I hate that people think money is the be all end all. Its just a means not the solution

  17. Quality women want commitment. everyone’s attractiveness. Some men are full of themselves, If men are 40s, still look good, quality women wouldn’t want to be with you, because WE DON’T SLEEP AROUND, and we want an equal partnership where we aren’t just carrying you to doctor visits. Old men can have kids, but still, studies show that older men are more likely to have kids with genetic disorders. Only gold diggers are willing to date old men. Quality women can find a good quality me closer to her age. Men who want to be lifetime bachelors should just sleep around with low quality women. Let men who want commitment date quality women.

    1. Oh, I know what sort of man would appeal to you. He’s available too if you don’t mind living in Chicago on SSI in an apt. filled with mangy cats with a guy who spends all of his time with trannies, fat females, lesbians and other female freaks on the Net. He’s a feminist too!

      1. hahaha i got a laugh out of your post actually. i’m actually the opposite of feminists… plus i’m taken already

  18. “For some having a Bentley in your driveway makes you happy. For others like myself, it’s freedom.”
    I was making $8K per month as an Army Officer. I was offered a $135k to work for a DoD MIC contractor. I declined both of those offers in favor of a position as a Firefighter. I earn slightly less than 70K per year (which sounds high but I estimate that it is average salary when you consider that I live in a high cost area.
    I work 1 x 24 hour shift and then have 48 hours off. I’ve also had a vasectomy without ever having kids. I’ll let others become the Generals and the CEOs. I truly hope they enjoy their $90K E Class at the end of their 14 hour work day. My time belongs to me.

  19. Thanks for relating this story, LD. Without making any comments about what your friend should or shouldn’t have done, what is clear from his behavior is that he is still metaphysically asleep. That’s true for 99.999% of the planet, hopefully a smaller proportion of RoK readers but it’s easy to think this little red pill equal THE Red Pill of Self-realization.
    The evidence from this example (even if allegorical, it echoes in our experience) points out that just having the trappings of success, money and power doesn’t create happiness. The deductive chain of logic is faulty. We all have seen / heard stories or know people who have little material riches yet immense joy. We usually deify those people as saints, guides, inspired leaders. They have seen the Truth.*
    There’s a reason why expressions such as ’causeless happiness’ arise in spiritual circles around the world. When a human mind has been programmed that ‘things you get / do / think will make you happy’, human consciousness is asleep. The biggest challenge is to question the premise itself. Is happiness really external, or (worse) generated through some internal meditative pranayama state or drug? What is here before, during and after that experience/thought/person/event is no longer ringing in my awareness? Is it actually possible to have nothing and be perfectly, blissfully content? Yes, absolutely! But in a mater-ially-focused society (mater = ‘mother’, btw), acquisition is lauded while divesting is not. I’m not speaking about being a dumb, drooling spiritual idiot “it’s all One, maaan!” Waking up frees tremendous energy that is then directed in Right Action that YOU determine by your calibrated inner compass whether it’s advantageous or not. Sometimes you’ll appear to be an asshole, sometimes kind – external perception matters not at all compared to your own internal sense of being aligned to Truth and your purpose.
    I believe that anyone who gives themselves the gift of leaving the gilded cage of any ‘modern’ Western society will be well on the way to causeless happiness. Chasing young foreign pussy, getting into scrapes, etc. may be various people’s lure but ultimately the wisest part of us is at the helm. The final looking glass is not outside, but inside.
    *Despite what ‘Guest’ attempts to point to, no one religion owns and is never a path to Truth any more than a finger pointing to the moon actually gets you there (or to realize there’s no where to get-to). Be free of dogma, live a life where one can’t guess your creed and your actions speak for themselves. Jesus wasn’t Jewish, Guatama wasn’t Buddhist – they woke up from the dogma into truth. But those who are asleep or half-awake need to couch understanding in familiar terms hence the writings retain the flavor of the tradition they were steeped in.

    1. Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth and the light, no man cometh unto the Father but by me.”
      The Buddha said, “Nobody saves us but ourselves. We alone must walk the path.”
      My teeth grind whenever I hear someone comparing the putrid, idiotic sleaze of Christianity’s dependency-forming lies with the Buddha’s light. The Buddha wasn’t even especially religious, likening our existence to being in an unhatched eggshell.

  20. And what value even one of those children calling you ‘Papa’ and hugging you.
    Multiply by six.

  21. I’ve seen that “dead” look in more married men’s eyes than I care to count. But usually I quickly pick up on the tensions causing it and it usually has something to do with the wife or kids or finances – the latter two often lead back to the wife anyway (men displace hostility at wives towards their kids and while I love money just as much as the next guy, men care more about money when women are on the line). It’s still possible it’s one of these three I guess. There’s a very successful doctor here (over 500thousand a year) who nevertheless is in oodles of debt and has a passive aggressive wife that “kills him with kindness.” The “kindness” she shows is very peculiar and its torture is very subtle because it means for him that he can never “let go” and “let loose”. It’s like a cage has been built up around various parts of his identity. You can argue her kindness is a good thing but look closely and you see the subtle manipulation behind it. He says to himself, “how could I be so angry/frustrated with her when I have such a good woman,” thus he puts a soul destroying lid on his deepest feelings and intuitions. This coupled with her (most likely) not putting out as often as he’d like would be torturous. The real question then I guess is what was he like before the marriage. I almost got married once. I told myself never again. Life is too short to squander on modern women. If you want to give back to society there are far more productive ways – volunteer in the community, create a program that helps whatever issue you’re interested in, or donate to a charity or cause.

    1. “Life is too short to squander on modern women. If you want to give back to society there are far more productive ways – volunteer in the community, create a program that helps whatever issue you’re interested in, or donate to a charity or cause.”

  22. I don’t know the guy but my first thought was that of course he’s miserable living off of another man’s money. What kind of self respect could he have?

    1. a fair point, but if i had to choose between making mid-level money on my own and marrying into old money, bringing along unparalleled freedom…..i suppose i could find other ways of manufacturing self-esteem by way of hobbies, sports, seduction and other such competitions. hell even if i would divorce, i’d be flipping the tables by getting alimony from her. boo-yah!

  23. I’m a woman and I just wanted to say that your article makes it seem as if his marriage and family is keeping him away from happiness. In contrast to your lifestyle of having sex with younger women, and without the responsibility of kids, it sure does seem like you have a freer life. But why credit this as the source of your happiness, and why point the finger at his marriage or family for his perceived unhappiness? Why do so many men have this sentiment? I want to raise a family, and grow old with one person. Do you really think that that would make my future husband unknowingly miserable? Well, of course I wouldn’t want that. And no, I’m not a feminist.

  24. Lol. Douchebag got married and had kids. What a dumbfuck.
    Of course the faggot is unhappy.
    All that just to stick your dick in a slimy stinky hole.
    Some men I will never figure out…

  25. This guy is one lost case away from taking to a water tower with a high-powered rifle and a bottle of ripple blanc.
    Having a wife and family is a lot more acceptable if you have to kill someone occasionally to protect them.

  26. Happiness is CAUSED by tension relief. All stresses/miseries in life are tensions. Exercise is tension application directly to the body. Eating is relief of hunger tension. Sex is relief of sexual tension. Drinking, relief of thirst tension. Achievement of desire, Desire tension relief. This is why we call “enlightement” feeling “light” because lightness is absence of tension. Sleep is relief of fatigue tension. Hopefully you are starting to get the picture.
    The grand goal here with capitalism is idealist tension. Also known as “Aesthetic tension”, things that are objectively ugly create a tension because humans, if they are healthy strive for the beautiful objective life to match their inner characters, our primal creative urge is for beauty in architecture, women, cars, and all material things. You cannot deny instinct with logic. If you want happiness you must submit to your instincts. It’s very blue pill to claim you rather have your piece of shit car than a bentley. Don’t lie to yourself. That is just settling/trying to deny materialism.
    For those who deny materialism… How is endless reading of Aristotle more valuable than something you can experience physically with 6 senses? I bet if i kicked one of the legs off the chair you are sitting in you’d be mighty pissed off, and immediately miserable. IF i made the air too hot, i bet you’d be uncomfortable. I’m a strong believer in materialism/the physical body and senses. All epistomological information is nothing more than fleeting speculation in the end. What about your material computer? Oh the horrors if you lose it for just one hour. Materialism > Learning miscellaneous facts. We are Aesthetic creatures, yes you can be happy, Identify tension, release tension = Happy. Words lack power and Knowledge is easily forgotten. The information age will make us all uselessly wise not “Happy”. Nothing is conclusive in life. Yes, what about if i told you you’re body has some kinda physical illness. I bet you’d start seething with rage, Time to admit you are a materialist creature and you need to satiate this immediately. “minimalism” is just that. a MINI- blue pill, settling for crap mentality. However there is an exception if you don’t spend and save. Technically you are still winning.
    Always hearing folks thinking of life in terms of red or blue. “if you can’t become wealthy, say wealth is worthless”. How about doing the best you can and be happy with whatever the universe wants to give you for your efforts. Why would we have an apex? We live around 76 years than die . We haven’t even fucking started yet. The ultimate goal of all science and males should be to solve this problem of aging, fuck females, we have bigger problems. Capitalism, Anti-aging technology is the future and a long with it. Sex bots, better than that ameri-skank who is a bot who won’t fuck you build by mind control media.

    1. I’d rather have fun than happiness. at least, with fun, you acknowledge that it’s not eternal… happiness is a myth that hinges on it continuing, and nothing is permanent… the things that make you happy are finite, and to maintain your happiness, like drugs, requires a continuing spiral of gratification.

      1. This is why women’s happiness is bullshit. Men sacrifice their entire lives to make their bitches “happy.” Happiness is a very abstract and subjective concept, that has no real meaning outside of instant gratification for us homo-sapiens. God, stability, family, work, honor, etc, were all things that were constants in the lives of our forbearers. These things all of sudden became subjected to the “happiness” of every queer, hippy and western tramp. An entire way of life, butchered for these degenerates. Nothing makes me sicker, when a grown ass man stands before me and says “happy wife, happy life.”
        I swear if I got a round of ammunition everytime I heard that shit, I could at this point declare war on China. No one has a right to destroy civilization for some bullshit called “happiness.” Maybe it was a mistake in our constitution, or maybe people forgot the fine print of “the pursuit of…” not actual fucking happiness in perpetuity. Instead of raising these ingrates today to value consistency in all things wholesome and real, these parents would rather base their entire parenting on their kids “happiness.” This is why my generation is so fucked, because they were raised by the Baby Boomers who told them to be “happy,” “nothing is ever your fault little Amy,” “sure have on facebook honey!” Your post was like a revelation to me.

        1. yep, ‘the pursuit of’.
          The pursuit of happiness is much like the pursuit of perfection… it is a goal to always be sought for, it is NOT something to be achieved.

        2. I don’t think we were designed to be in a large collective called “civilization” Almost all technological advancement is actually only caused by 0.001% of the population who are usually SERIOUS insiders part of the underground intelligentsia and have a connected lineage suggesting they are simply smarter than us and we are their pets. Sorry folks but you have been dominated by a massive and intelligent power which can think 12 steps ahead of you in every way possible and has planned your life out. You can’t win but your ego won’t allow you to accept that.
          Humans are territorial and tribal creatures. The rest of humanity is actually a hysterical theatrical performance, they are playing a game. Living in society is a performance, it is not authentic in any way. I seriously believe we are being directed by an occult ritual. But i can;t say that because its too much for 2014, perhaps in 2030 it will be acceptable that your life is dominated by a black obsidian rectangle. That you get all your information on it from a program called the “web” or the “net”. It suggests a trap for animals.
          We all think in terms of belonging to some group and think of our fellow man as some bright guy, when the reality is, we are parasitical serfs who hate eachother what a fucked up situation. I’m not talking just females, any male would immediately lose his honor if it meant 10 seconds with an attractive female or would line up to celebrate your misfortune for his own advancement. Sorry but i have seen the dark side. i have not met one human who did not fuck me over or try to. NOT ONE, and worst of all are females who you let in the most easily who fuck you up the most! How tragic. I refuse to chase after a piece of cunt when i could aggrandize myself in unlimited ways. I have abandoned the concept of my “humanity” and believe in science, and materialism. All else is outdated and primitive animalistic and useless in modern times. We are in a brave new world. The only way to adapt is to throw away basic human honor and dignity. I have joined the dark side. Why? By default because i realize there is no light side, Only suckers.

      2. The point is that the problem of misery/mental illness is caused by what i define as the “Subjective Idealist” LIE. The belief that all one needs in life is some idle belief or philosophical close minded intellectual numbing. Work on feathering your nest materialistically , than when you are 65 you can prepare for your eventual death by heart disease, cancer, or both & prepare for senility, you’ll have all the time you need to do some shelob yoga poses, become a worthless “spiritualist” and quote freud, heiddegar, nietzsche and the works and be “wise”. With materialism realization acceptance,i admitted i was fooling myself thinking i was “happy” or even that happiness was some unattainable and elusive pleasure. The saying is, “the gods keep mankind ignorant to the ways of living, else they would do enough in a day to last a year”. While you strive to attain wealth or materialst power, You will aquire all the virtues and enlightenment needed a long with it, therefor you kill two birds with ONE stone. The attainment of a difficult goal makes one wise, and this wisdom quantifies itself into everything else. They are one and the same. Philosophy is a personal art/science that dictates you can achieve happiness with a direct analytic approach using “attitude”. I call these sorts of people “intelligent idiots”. A contradiction, just like their behavior. Philosophy is nothing more than the IDEA though very clever and a lot of genius’s have made it (hilariously entertaining) Especially heideggar who, after all his years being an existential scholar, retreated into the simple art of “teaism” the simple practice of enjoying a cup of tea. I’m not joking. There are intelli-dummies who spend years on his work trying to get somewhere. LOL. Intelligent people con themselves with mental-masturbation material due to a naive and parasitical personality trait or a materiast-denial beta trait. The TRAP of philosophy. A lot of it is also escapism from building wealth. Its easier for someone to buy into the idea they can be happy by reading intelli- knowledge than to stop lying to themselves about how important materialism is to them. What is harder a decade of trial and hard work for something you can grasp materially? or some knowledge bits you forget the next morning or a year from now? The brain simply does not care about wisdom. It is a temporarily ego massage that is the most fleeting of all.
        the idea that happiness is some mind-set. This is all new-age charlatanry propagating the masses to be sold off so when the economy is bad, you have a defeatist slave mentality, and are able to fool yourself into thinking materialism is false. Materialism is actually the true philosophical path, Not religion, not some Taoist Nirvana mindset. Also, “happiness IS fun”. What else would it be? and could you have fun without materials? What world do we live in? the objective MATERIAL world, therefor does that not mean an “alpha” dominating conquering male would want to have control over the material world which is the TRUE world and the only thing he controls? and given that you are going to live for 75 -83 years, can you not take ONE decade, to 15 years to embark on the journey of wealth? Think about it, By age 45 you will have forgotten all the knowledge you learned when you are 30. Material power if LIFE-LONG. Wisdom is an easily forgettable bit. Health, and than wealth my friend. That is my point. Neither are fleeting. Feather your nest and do not invite a vulture female into it, do not give the keys to the material kingdom which you work hard for to a WHORE. Do not invite in a parasite in your life to shorten it. Im sorry but it’s time to stop denying we are surrounded by dangerous parasites in a human form, and i’m not talking about just some corrupt control grid. Most people are parasitical, Males, FEMALESx10 and the works. The only thing of value you can get from this short stint of a rock in the middle of space surrounding some radioactive ball of fire(sun) is some kind of material accomplishment and nothing else is to be believed except that which you can touch, use, and satiate the senses with!
        Now due to not giving a shit and also time constraints my articulation has been rather poor, But for those of you who ge it. What if i’m right? I think philosophy and intellectualism is a naive symptom of the bad economy. It is escapism. Pretend “value”. Heideggar who wrote the masterpiece “time and being” got famous when the economy started to go to shit and men started being more analytical, Funny they didn’t give two shits about wisdom when they were raking in the coins.

        1. really long rant to combat a simple concept, especially since you seem to feel that I have a stance on the subject that I do not.
          spiritualism? dafuq? Happiness is transitory, I am just pointing out that 100% materialism is no more likely to provide what our animal brain desires in the long run than a constant unending orgy.
          To me, happiness is killing things.

      3. The reason you do not think happiness is constant and attainable is because due to propaganda you have been told to look elsewhere than materialism. We have all been lied to while elites are getting gorgeous prostitutes with our tax money, and i bet they are a lot happier than you are right now with their so-called “materialism”.
        Evil genius: “yeshhh tell them money doesn’t matter” HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE …..meanwhile.. prostitutes all day, mansions. HEHEHEHEHEHE . Whilst you get a shit apartment and have to contemplate, fuck is there another way? Well guess what pal we have all been fucked over with our taxes and lied to, every american enters the world owing 20 years to a public indoctrination camp, and 50% of their earnings. What a goddam tragic situation were in and the sex-attainment is even a pain in the fucking ass after being fleeced.

        1. Every once in a while, they’ll allow a guy-next-door type to get a taste, to give you slaves some hope

        2. They call this “hollywood” which was the wood used on staffs for magic rituals by druids. A symbol of black magic and mind control, Directing the human spirit.

    2. Happiness is CAUSED by tension relief. All stresses/miseries in life are tensions.

      If this is true, and I’m not saying I disagree, wouldn’t that mean we exist to suffer and we’ve conflated pain relief with happiness?
      If relief from pain is as good as it gets, why is anyone here?

  27. “He was a dead man. At dinner one night I watched him as he held his youngest son, an infant, and for minutes on end he would just stare into space with empty eyes. You can tell when someone is looking off to the side thinking about something. This was not it. It was a robotic, dead gaze.”
    Actually, that was the look of a man who is saying “Why did I invite this fuck over here?” Listen, Jeff is saving western civilization by marrying and having kids.
    What are YOU doing besides pumping and dumping?

    1. Helping to destroy the inhuman piece of shit that western civilization has become?

    2. wait, what? why these delusions of grandeur? who says we MUST contribute to saving/preserving civilization? on whose orders? have you ever considered that maybe some of us could not care less about ‘legacies’ and what will happen once we’re worm-food? but hey, don’t stop procreating on my account, i’ll be needing your daughters to fuck in 18-20 years.

    3. Western Civilisation doesn’t care about us so why should we sacrifice our freedom to save it? Also, the west (the white man) has nothing to prove, we’ll be remembered throughout history for creating the greatest civilisation known to man before feminists and third worlders ruined it. You are treated as a disposable man and it seems like you’ve figured this out too late.

  28. Stacking paper, working hard, and banging chicks is all well and good but when you die do you leave it all to the state? My point is ultimately your purpose in life will be to procreate, and leave your wealth and wisdom to your children. Game, travel, young hot tight pussy is good and all but by the age of 50 you will want children.
    Jeff May be unhappy for a host of reasons but he is a good and decent man for for putting up happy front in the face of company and friends , that is how men of dignity and class carry themselves in public. When you have children total happiness is impossible, worry and preoccupation with the children is unavoidable. That is life….

    1. Conan defined happiness perfectly. Anything less is misery.
      Crush your enemy
      Zee him driven before you
      ant hear ze lamentations off ze women!

  29. If his wife just recently had another child, Jeff is staring off into space for lack of sleep due to a waking child.
    Within my own sight realm…if someone like a Jeff married right out of or before finishing college…the chances of that couple staying together is slim.

  30. To Western People, what I’m about to say may sound really, really odd and off-topic but hear me out for a sec. I think the core problem with families/ or having a family today is due to the Child Labor Law (wherein it is illegal for children to work).
    In our country, the happiest children are the ones in the very remote mountainous areas (unreachable by law enforcers), wherein they enjoy carrying at least one to two newly cut down timber (due to lack of technology) and they get paid for a peso (0.05 dollars) per trunk they carry. One may say this is child abuse, but in the contrary, children LOVE hard work if they are taught of these things early on, and parents guide them how not to get injured while doing the job. Parents introduce their children to risks at a young age and this seems to be the natural order of things in the animal world. And these children grow to be extremely successful, and fucking strong physically, mentally, and emotionally. Both boys and girls are made to work, with different yet equally important tasks. boys are for hardcore jobs, girls are for handicrafts which I do believe they really are better than us in that field, they have softer and more flexible hands. And the adults are pretty much happy, with almost no idle moments, they are masters of their land – they produce their own food, shelter, clothing and export the extras and they relax more, dance more, sing more.
    Comparing it to city life, City Children do not have a clue as to what they are doing, they have no motivation, and they make their parents miserable. And soon when they become immature parents themselves they just keep passing on the misery.

    1. heh, you are assuming the wrong crowd. We are red pill here, and recognition that most quote ‘child protection laws’ endquote are nothing more than government-authorized interference in family formation and social development is well understood.
      Most of us old farts remember playing in the woods after school without adult supervision, or working HARD after school and in the summer… we know we were not harmed by this besides a few minor accidents, and recognize that federally-mandated child ‘protection’ laws have created an entire generation of pathetic, feminized weaklings.

    2. well i wouldn’t call them necessarily ‘happy’, but rather doing their bit for the families. this whole child-labor shit boils down to one simple question. would the kids and their family be better off if the child were unemployed, or are they better off with his (albeit meager) addition to the family budget? when you can’t afford to feed your family, every single sweatshop-earned cent is helpful!
      all the hippies who want to ban child labor are in fact campaigning for reducing an already poor family’s cash flow. if that’s not indirect child-cruelty, what is?

  31. I’m not sold on this article. Jeff seems like he’s got it all. I’d kill to have the security and dough that he has.

  32. Married men do not live longer than unmarried men… it just feels like it takes forever to die.

    1. I think the joke goes “Why do married men die before their wives?” “Because they want to.”

  33. If you have 6 kids you are going to have that 1000 yard stare at days end….
    We all have different paths to walk. Some of us surrounded by nicely manicured lawns, granite counters tops, polo shirts, and lots of fiat paper for our “security”, some of us not so much. The grass “ain’t” greener you create the satisfaction within by living with integrity and maximizing the cards dealt.

  34. Is freedom from commitment, responsibility and sacrifice what makes a man? Or does that describe a child?

    1. I’m sure you didn’t mean to sound that way, but it sounds like classic “man up” shaming techniques. The risk / reward ratio just doesn’t make it a good bet for most men these days. At least not with the typical American woman who has been exposed to “you go grrl power” since birth.

      1. I understand what you mean but as you guessed I did not mean it that way. I personally do not deal with typical American women. But should our response to the difficulties of marriage mirror the feminist approach? I.e. just doing what you want when you want, becoming a hedonist?
        I accept that thanks to the State, marriage became a shitty deal. But what is your other option? Stay single forever, into old age? No children or have children by multiple partners? Suppose you have daughters – is the example to set for them? To become precisely the kind of woman we despise?
        At some point, many of us will desire to have a family. At this point, we will have to go into this “shitty deal” with our eyes open, not marrying a typical American woman, and having a back-up plan to protect ourselves financially, or be prepared in advance to write certain things off.
        If we look at our heroes, throughout history, many of them faced much worse risk/reward ratios. But what made them heroes is that they moved forward anyway. My father is one of my heroes – he got a shitty deal, got divorced, lost his house etc. But in the end he prevailed. We can too.

    2. Marriage has never defined a man as anything but a needy child. Women don’t need marriage. They didn’t want to work. Men told them to go f themselves, literally. The worst men agreed.
      If marriage were decent or natural there would be no need for ties that bind or wedlock. Why should a man be forced to perpetually provide care to someone unwilling to perpetually earn that care? Real men don’t do that. Desperate men in denial do that

      1. I have to say, none of this makes any sense or seems to have any basis in history or reality.

        1. It’s based in biology. But sociological slavery (obligated labour) and Josef Fritzl-like romantic marriage “Till death do us part” disconnected Humanity and brought the world to extinction.
          So there’s that.

        2. Brought the world to extinction? Seems a bit of an exaggeration. You seem to judging the entire institution of marriage by its current debased state. That is down to feminism’s attack on Western culture. It wasn’t always so. Man’s place as head of the family has been usurped by the State. This is the problem.

        3. One imagines the institution had been corrupted long before they started going after bastards / whoresons when being seen as illegitimate in the eyes of Matriarchal law wasn’t adequate. They had to resort to stigma to take out the threat represented by sons of women who were not whores, did not need marriage, had no need to enslave a man in exclusive wedlock and therefore represented an intolerable threat to Polite Society’s mothers / wives / whores / slaveowners.
          If they weren’t going to do the job on their sons, the married whores had to step in with their stigma. Were you under the impression the guy that worked to carry the woman that didn’t was the head of the family? How does that logic work?

        4. Who does the work? They are the slaves.
          Who cracks the whip? They own the slaves.
          Who binds who to whom? Who is bound? That men are sold the illusion of control is incredibly embarrassing for men. How curious that men should value carrying emasculating, infantile leeches who’ve been insulting their reduced intelligence for thousands of years.
          It’s almost as if men have been made to feel they have something to prove to sub-worthless, needy leeches who abuse them…

  35. The poor bastard probably has the dead stare because he’s up to his eyeballs in debt.

  36. Jeff sounds like he did what most married American men do: give up their freedom and independence for what they are told will be the good life – what they are told they are supposed to do. One day you find out your kids can’t stand you and you no longer have any intimacy with your wife.
    The Europeans (at least in the south) have the great institution of having a mistress. They know this happens in all marriages and realize that it is too much to expect one woman to be both mother and lover. But for some reason that is
    frowned on in the US. Your wife can’t give you what you want, need and deserve – but damned if you think you’re going to get it anywhere else. Just accept your servitude like a good little serf.
    I told my wife that if she wanted us to stay married I was going to see someone else for my intimacy needs since I has been deprived for years. She had little choice but to accept it.
    My theory, fwiw, is that if having a mistress was normal and accepted, the divorce rate would be much lower.

  37. I think most men and women just follow along the standard milestones without ever questioning what they really want. We’re told this is what we’re all supposed to do at certain ages (go to school, get corp job, buy house, get married, have kids…) when in fact that is just 1 option. I don’t give people that choose this traditional path any shit(well the occasional ribbing is fun) and I just ask for the same in return when I don’t choose that same path. We’re all kinda brainwashed from a young age-we’re never told “if you marry, have kids…” it’s always WHEN you marry and have kids. My own parents were just as guilty of this.

    1. Brilliant. Don’t know how old your are, but bravo for realizing at a young age (just assuming the typical 20s-30s ROK reader).

      1. Thanks-I’m 36 and always felt like something is off in the world of relationships. It’s been great to discover sites like this one to finally validate what I’ve always suspected. Better late than never I suppose

  38. My bet: she had his kids, got fat, and cancelled his sex life. No house, car, or paycheck will raise his morale. This is theft of semen and would be a felony if the red pill interwebbz ruled the world.

  39. Hm. I have a Bentley (2004 Conti GT to be precise) AND I love hanging out in leftfield indie cafes.
    Life is not so simple – the guy with money is not always the boring one.

  40. What is weird about the american dream (Jeff’s life) is that it is something we will always be drawn towards. However, we can’t just taste it and decide if we like it or not. It is a commitment. So the catch is to do it hope it works out for the best, or you spend the rest of your life wondering if being independent was the right decision. I’m still on the fence of what I want (complete independence or the “american dream”), and I think that is a good thing.

    1. In the year 2014 the likelihood of achieving the erstwhile American Dream with an American woman is pretty remote. You are pretty much at the whim and fancy of your wife who has the government at her back at all times. So there is an enormous amount of risk on your side and almost none on the woman’s side. With a woman of true character that really is not an issue, but they are an increasing rarity.

  41. there’s no time for sex if they have 6 kids… all that tension inside his friend. Man, his dick must be chapped from his hand… still… hand and vag feels different.

  42. I found lack of inspection in WHAT is making your friend so upset deeply unsettling.
    Is it his job? The relationship with his wife? How his kids treat him? Family trouble?
    Really? Unhappiness like described in the article really does not happen in a vacuum.

  43. What is this a fucking conspiracy? Go get a get a real woman, you don’t a million bucks. Get out of here, you’re single for a reason.

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