I Hope Tool Releases An Album This Year


All this talk about the Islamic State has got me reminiscing about my second favorite country in the world, Iraq. This nostalgia also reminds me about something that seems like a lifetime ago, the last time the band Tool came out with an album. One day after a long afternoon of sightseeing in and around the city of Tikrit, I returned to my residence as the sun was setting. As I slid the barrel to my .50 caliber machine gun under my bed and then placed the receiver group next to it, I heard something very familiar yet very new to me play through the plywood wall.

As I heard the song (unknown to me at that time, called “Vicarious”), I asked my neighbor what he was listening to. He informed me that Tool had a new CD and there were five of them left at the PX by the by the Victory Inn DFAC. I decided cleaning the machine gun could wait, and hurried to pick  up a copy. I fondly remember utilizing the built-in bifocal lenses of the cover to stare at many things. It was the year 2006.

What Is Tool?

Tool is a band fronted by a man who goes by the name Maynard James Keenan. The other members are Danny Carey, Adam Jones, and Justin Chancellor. The band has a larger than cult following due to their clever musical layouts, lyrics, and style. This band is quite popular considering its music is not available for sale on iTunes. The band’s discography starts with with the EP “Opiate” in 1992 and continues to the album “10,000 Days” in 2006. With their independent thought, total creative control, and oddly-metered songs, Tool is unique in the music industry. Their lyrics are rather ingenious and inspire deep thought for the listener. Such creativity is not apparent to me with the current mainstream music on the radio.

Why I Like Tool

Aside from song titles as “Prison Sex” and “Sober,” the actual meter of the music caught my attention. Having studied music before, playing anything other than four beats a measure is much harder to play. When I heard “Guitar Hero: World Tour” and some Tool song on it, I purchased it immediately and had many purchases of extra guitars over the course of the year due to my frustrations playing “Vicarious.”

Sometimes when I go to the grocery store or to the coffee shop after of the gym, other men compliment me on my Tool t-shirts. It’s almost like a secret handshake of sorts because I live in the Bible Belt. These shirts are starting to get “well-worn” due to soaking up sweat and disinfectant spray at the gym and being bleached by the sun when running outside. This is another reason I hope Tool releases a new album this year, so I can score some new threads to look good in while working out.

Hope For The Future

It is well known that Tool’s front man has many other projects. Maynard James Keenan is also the front man of the band “A Perfect Circle.” He has another project called “Puscifer.” This along with other band members’ side projects could have led to a delay, but I do not know. I do know I was cool with the supposed it five-year plan implied by the scheduled releases starting with “Aenima” in 1996, to “Lateralus” in 2001, and “10,000 Days” in 2006.

Aside from the non-mainstream EBM groups out of Europe, there has been no music really worth buying in the last seven years. Where I live all the radio stations merely play manufactured top-40 music. One cannot make it through an hour scanning the radio without hearing the band “Nickelback.” One can only hope that there is a new Tool album to fill this void in the coming year’s time.

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32 thoughts on “I Hope Tool Releases An Album This Year”

  1. When I was driving through Arizona I tried finding Maynard’s wine, but couldn’t find any. Heard it kinda sucked anyhow.
    I disagree with the no good music in the last seven years. There aren’t a lot of great bands out there, but there are some good alt-country/southern rock acts floating around: Lucero, Drive By Truckers, Jason Isbell, Slobberbone, Hayes Carl, Wayne Hancock, etc. Gaslight Anthem are basically single handedly keeping traditional rock n roll alive. If you want harder stuff, Georgia bands Kylesa and Mastadon are shattering what you thought metal could be. Soooo good.

    1. Most of the bands you named are significantly better than Tool, who I saw at lollapolooza in the early 90s. There is more good music out there now than ever – you just have to sift through the shit.

      1. While I think this article is actually kinda pointless… Tool is one of the most influential acts of the 90s early 2000s.
        Like a lot of really great music it requires more than one listen. And their studio work is where it is at… their live act is hit or miss.
        They brought together a lot of the weird sub-culture of the time and their work remains a great musical artifact. Some of their songs are timeless IMO (e.g. Lateralus, The Grudge, Schism, Aenima, Sober, Prison Sex, Third Eye).
        I think they’re a little outdated now but thats fine… they were perfect for the time. In fact, I wish they stopped producing music after Lateralus… their legacy was perfect before they released 10,000 days.
        I think similarly of Nirvana. In some ways I even think Kurt HAD to die… he would have had no place in the modern facebook era.

  2. MEANWHILE, while alleged plagiarist Charles C. Johnson is spending personal resources to uncover Micheal Brown’s juvenile record in attempts to expose massive media bias and its goals of divisiveness, Douglas is wondering when a 20-year-old band like Tool will release it’s next album.
    Charles C Johnson, I’M WATCHING YOU!!!

  3. Ah yes, “Sober”, quite a powerful tune and vocal job. I had to go and buy the CD “Undertow” after watching Tool on MTV. Young people may not know but back then MTV actually played music videos!

    1. Tool is perhaps the only real hard music band with a true spiritual message…This article hints you to the next stage of a real man’s development = spiritual life…
      How long do you think, even with game, you’ll be able to get your dick wet (without paying for it)?
      we’ll all have to get beyond pussy so…reach out to embrace the random, reach out to embrace whatever may come 😉

  4. Tool! my very first concert. I was just out of high school. Saw them at the long beach arena. I think Meshugah opened. Great Article man. I remember standing in line at best buy before it opened to grab 10,000 days the day it came out. I dont buy music…. ever. For Tool, i’ll make an exception. I love the odd time signatures in their music. Songs such as “The Patient” and “Jambi” are in 3/4 or 5/4 I believe. Sound really fucking good.
    As the other readers have said, there is tons of great non mainstream music out there. Check out the band Thrice. One of my all time favorites. Their earlier stuff is more harcore punk rock( Albums- the illusion of safety, Identity crisis and the artist and the ambulance). They evolved into more experimental sounds with albums (The alchemy index and Vheissu).
    Forget the radio. Anyone born before 1995 is not in their demographic anymore.
    Just put tool into your pandora station and let it find similar sounds for you. Your article made my day better. Streaming full Tool albums on youtube as we speak.

  5. Minor Tool fan, much less after I witnessed them live twice. First show was unispired, and the second show was similar. Pretty certain that they played to backing tracks, but then again, a large percentage of groups do that nowadays. Take me to a Clutch show for 90s hard rock.

  6. As much as I like Tool, there is so much good metal out there. Check out Meshuggah, for example. Or even something like Dream Theater, Periphery, Scale the Summit, etc.

    1. Tool is prog metal? that’s news to me!!!Dream Theater?!? that’s gay metal to me, no offense …

  7. What the fuck is this “my personal subjective opinion on some 90s band” I came here to read about picking up chicks not music reviews where the author obviously thinks he’s hip.

    1. What is this negative fucking comment, I came here to read positive encouraging comments, you son of a bitch.

      1. In case you haven’t noticed a large proportion of nerds who get into pickup have spent their lives in front of their computers playing games and are mentally imbalanced people.

  8. Not be a jack-ass, but I think that if an article was written as a testament to great 90’s music, we would’ve had these guys ranking in top 5, am I right or am I right ?:

    1. Prodigy, like the Beatles, will never ever get too outdated to listen to.
      If I need an energy boost… Prodigy always gets the job done.

  9. Did April Fools day come early? Was the site hacked? Did you all just get really high together and post this? What the fuck is this nonsense anyway? PERTINENT QUESTIONS
    Even as a music review, this is shit. Stop wasting our time with your adolescent attempts at cleverness.

  10. I enjoy Nickelback more so than Tool these days. At least Niceklback aren’t pretentious about what they offer – straight up good times, chicks and booze.
    Tool are great too, don’t get me wrong. But every single Tool “fan” thinks they have discovered the missing link and that people who don’t exalt over how awesome Tool are just “don’t get it”.
    I used to “get it”, believe me, but now I get much much more and so Tool are just another good band in the mix.

  11. I take that back. You want red pill ? Here you go.
    I have the feeling these guys are truly singing, i emphasize SINGING, not just talking randomly about the RED PILL in societal concern. I strongly believe that we limit the red pill to strictly women. We have a larger potential at hand. Any takers ?

  12. Hey my man Doug…Respect to your advancement on this site to be able to write an article but stay the fuck away from shit like this bro

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