Why Major Metropolitan Cities Are Hell For Dating

After spending my entire year on the road, there was one question I was absolutely sick of by the end of it.

“Why did you leave America? It’s supposed to be so wonderful and full of opportunity and the people are oh-so-friendly!”

Inevitably, I’d mention something about how brutal the dating scene was in a place like Los Angeles. I’d hate on American girls a little bit, Eastern European women tended to simply eat that up (as long as you did it in a non-bitter way). Inevitably more questions would come about why the dating scene in America is so miserable.

I found a system to make my point and move on quickly, but it did make me think a little bit. What exactly made dating in major metropolitan cities so bad? And that doesn’t just apply to American cities. It’s places in Western Europe like London also suffer from this epidemic.

I sat down and drew out the road map as to why the dating game has become so incredibly difficult for men. Here’s what I came up with.

Little Person, Big City

lpbc

This topic is has been discussed to death so there’s little reason to go into full depth other than for clarity.

Needless to say, many, many young folks (both men and women) move from the rural parts of countries to go live in the big cities. The Sex and the City life, if you will. The real problem is not so much the elaborate dreams—it’s the lies that young people are told about the way that life works.

I’m only 25, and I distinctly remember being told repeatedly that I could in fact, have it all. I could find a nice girl in college and get married. I’d get a job that was fulfilling that I’d want to stay at the rest of my life because of mutual respect. I could buy all sorts of fancy cars and toys on credit and it would just be part of life. I could have it all!

Women are told a slightly different agenda—that they can get the top men in the world. No matter what. It doesn’t matter that she’s fat, unpleasant, or just simply not top-shelf. No, every girl is told that she can have the most high value men in the world if she just shows up and “is herself.”

And guess where the most high-value men in the world are? That’s right, right in the heart of the metropolitan cities. That same big city that she’s moving to. So not only will she get to live the exciting party life, but when she’s done with that part of her life (30 years old, 30 pounds heavier, and 300% more unpleasant than before) she’ll be able to lock up the billionaire.

It’s easy to chuckle at that laugh paragraph but can you really tell me that it’s not the truth of what really happens? Every girl who moves to a major city is told this in one form or another.

NYC And LA As Examples

hwood

Ah, but here is the evil part of that little propaganda and apply it to two of the biggest cities in the world.

If you live in New York City, you’re always going to find a more successful and wealthy Wall Street banker. There is always going to be another rung to climb. Even if a girl managed to lock down a billionaire, she’d be told she could lock down a better billionaire! Zuckerberg isn’t exactly a masculine icon that gets the juices flowing apart from his obvious money.

You could also apply this same NYC system to other major financial, tech, or political cities—London, Washington D.C., San Francisco, etc.

(It’s worth noting that NYC is a better city for dating than many of the alternatives.)

If you live in Los Angeles, girls are always going to think that they can get a better celebrity. Upgrade from a B-list to an A-list. “Oh, your B-list musician boyfriend is just a B-list…you girl, deserve an A-list bonafide actor like Leonardo!”

You can apply the Los Angeles system to other places that vanity and celebrity worship is practically the backbone of the economy—Miami, San Diego, etc. Just about anywhere with a warm beach.

None of this seems to apply to major cities in the East such as Kiev, where Ukrainian culture regarding the dating market is much more in check.

The Flip Side

flip-side

On the other side of the equation, men are told different lies. If you’re fat, broke, and have no confidence, people aren’t telling you that you can get a Victoria’s Secret model. For context, that’s the equivalent of a girl who is a 6 being told that she can date Brad Pitt (and yeah, they’re told that).

But, men are told that it’s okay to be like that and that eventually a decent girl will simply pick them. So while we aren’t told as blatant a lie as women are, the resulting fallout of that lie means that we don’t improve ourselves. Rather than climbing the rung to the top of the food chain, we wallow in mediocrity.

The end result is that all women pine for the best man they can get (in their normal, biological nature, but exemplified by city living) and men are told we don’t need to be the best man we can.

The result is a miserable dating scene for everybody.

Conclusion

Let’s be realistic. If you’re a girl and a 7, you’re not getting a super alpha. If you’re a man and you’re a broke slob, you’re not getting an even decent-looking girl. You’re pretty much left with the scrap heaps, because all women are gunning for the top.

Women aren’t happy in the dating scene because they’re always being told that they can do better. Even if they’re dating a good guy who has his life together and is by all means a good fit—her friends will actively encourage her to seek better at the first signs of turmoil.

Men aren’t happy in the dating scene because of the attitude women have towards it. Wallowing in mediocrity seems like a far easier option. Even if you “make it” to the top, it’s still endless games and energy being expanded on women who aren’t worth it.

Is there a solution to all of this? If there is, I’d be keeping it to myself and trying to put it into a pill form. Unfortunately, I think this is just the hand we’ve been dealt—it’s up to all of us to make the most of it.

Want to learn how to combat these issues as best as possible—and take the power back from women? Buy Kyle’s best-selling book, King’s Code. For more information about dating girls abroad, check out his site Eastern European Travel.

Read More: 7 Things I Learned On The Road This Year

472 thoughts on “Why Major Metropolitan Cities Are Hell For Dating”

  1. Over here in Germany the college student ratio is a major criteria: The higher the percentage of college students in the city’s population the higher your notch count will be.
    I studied in a somewhat little city (pop roughly 90000) with 25 % of its inhabitants students at the local university. It was aaaawwesome

    1. “Over here in Germany…”
      If you don’t mind I ask you – but aren’t the white anglo german women rebuking German men in exchange to fuck muzzie immigrants? When I was there years ago it seemed that German women prefered non white men. Fast forward to today, and maybe I’m seeing too many photos of German women holding “refugees welcome” signs as well as german women holding signs thar say “free kisses for refugees”.
      This is a sincere question – I avoid Germany like the plague simply because of the destruction waged by your political elites – so my only info source is via alternative based.

        1. I honestly laughed when that EU diplomat’s daughter got raped and murdered – she had been volunteering at a refugee center !

      1. I don’t mind your question Jimbo. Although i would consider myself a conservative i hate to judge your imaginations as classical stereotypes. Yes, we have our problems in men/women-relationships over here (not as bad as in the US) but the german women also tend to fall for hypergamy, which excludes most of your aforementioned groups. They indeed like to cheer for immigrants but having sexy time with them is not very common.
        Apart from the current political elites, germany is a wonderful place to live. Yet, I don’t know for how long.

        1. I hear you JDR and I would wager that with the increase in rapes and crime, I would imagine that perhaps german women are more inclined to want to be with german men ?
          I’ve always preferred german women, but being a white male I’ve always felt rather that die Deutschen Frauen see me as second class – perhaps it is my imagination.
          Are there german women (in their 20’s) who would be looking to get into a relationship with an american man who lives in a safer part of europe? I’m not looking just to fuck and dump – I’d seriously consider a serious relationship. If this is possible, how would one find such a gal? I want to filter out all the worthless Gutenmensche bitches.

        2. Well yes I think they are out there. As a white american you still have more value to german women than as a fellow german man, at least that’s my impression.
          The problem is: I am the wrong person to ask when it comes to serious relationships. IMO todays dating generation is fkked up beyond repair. When I have a girlfriend, I know that in 3-6 months this relationship inevitably ends. No exception. Took me a while but I’m very comfortable with it.
          For filtering: Thats easy. Say that you are a Trump supporter. Gutmenschen-Bitches will go full bananas then.

        3. Thanks man – whats the best way to meet these german gals? Any social media or will I have to travel to Germany? And if so which cities / towns are best?

    1. I don’t think he’s ever been abroad even though he’s now mid 30s. His advice and experiences is coming from an entirely U.S. perspective.

      1. No, I didn’t mean that but his views on LA. Should have put it more exactly. He found heaven in LA, made his luck with women there and didn’t complain about them

        1. If he found heaven in LA then why does he live in Idaho now lol? Look Chris is a good guy and tries to make his readers optimist instead of pessimist. The reality is though that LA is shit for dating and any guy with half a brain knows that. Unless of course you’re a top of the heap apex alpha. Very few men are of course and would be better served spending their dating energy in other parts of the country or world.

        2. I did just fine in LA living there as recently as earlier this year.
          It was just a lot more work than I’d care to do. And I was just ready to quit the 9-5 and move abroad.

        3. LA is the Pareto Principle On Steroids. Maybe he’s on the beneficiary end of that principle.

  2. If your a western guy residing in North America, Australia, or Europe this might be the case but HELL NO for Asia.
    Tinder has turned major metros like Singapore into a dating heaven if your a reasonably good looking and presentable White guy, and your just a 2 singapore dollar MRT ride to a plethora of spots to meet your woman and spit your game.
    Same story for Saigon or Hanoi in Vietnam as they’ll have the largest number of women with good knowledge of English using the app. Nice looking birds too.
    Only western broads have been sold all this “you can have it all” vomit.

    1. They don’t like white men in Vietnam: Vietnam defeated the U.S. so they haven’t been brainwashed into being self-loathing. Viet guy with a moped will get much hotter Vietnamese girls than some white guy with an Audi in Vietnam. FACT

  3. I don’t know about LA, but NYC is perfect for dating – the numbers man…
    LA – seems to suck – have to drive – stand in line etc…
    NYC — is loaded with women – everywhere- day and night…
    Just start walking and talking…
    I’ll give you a couple of most excellent venues:
    MET – Metropolitan Museum of Art — several hundred single(alone) women in there any day…
    Woody Allen can do it so can you…

    1. I never had luck at all in LA. Total strike out. I think NYC is absolutely perfect for dating though. I couldn’t wish for things to be better.
      Ever do the met rooftop martini bar in the summer. It is almost impossible not to get laid. When you are done head over to the Mark for a bite to eat then to the Carlyle for drinks and end the night at the uber sexy Bar Pleiades at the surrey

      1. tux for all those places?
        I’m usually not in city in summer.
        I reckon is better than Hamptons…
        maybe next year…

        1. Depends on the night. I usually wear a suit but occasionally put on my tux. I have a very cool modern one.

        2. I used to do one weekend a year in the hamptons but got tired of it. If I leave the city during the summer now it is usually to get to the Hudson valley and just totally relax

      2. So in other words NYC is perfect as long as your pulling 6 figures to pay the astronomical rent and drop $10-15 per drink at various in-crowd joints on a regular basis. Gotcha

        1. 15 dollars! I wish. Try 25. I do get a good pour though. Yes, NYC like any other place, is much better if you have a nice pad, a well paid job and a title that makes girls coo. That said, this is not the only game. My young cousin is living with 3 roommates a little further north than me and he is a student who works at the university so you can imagine he doesn’t have a ton of money by a long shot. That said, he manages to be out and scoring with very attractive girls on the regular.

        2. Christ, I blow $700 or more in a strip club on a weeknight. NYC would probably get me laid by much more cunning sluts, with better sexual technique, superb flattering methodology, totally believable lies…and I’d save money.

        3. Depends on your situation and angles. If you have enough cash, banging a stripper is a much safer play (for me, anyway), then taking out some gold-digger who pretends she isn’t interested in money. Plus, you can see the merchandise.

        4. My angle is that kind of money can just keep you going in Southeast Asia someplace for the greater part of a month, and just mack the ladies with normal game.

        5. Yeah, that is far more than I spend in a weekend. I will go out on Friday and Saturday, pick up tabs for the chow, booze and whatever cover charges and usually make it through the weekend having only spend 500 bucks or so. I feel I am traipsing in incredibly high quality women. One of my currents is just right for me. You would like this one.
          I will say about new York that is different than other cities is that it is a place for every budget (to spend time, not to live). I could very easily go out and meet people and get laid and have a blast over a weekend and spend 40 bucks for 40k. There is so much to do at every part of the spectrum it is really wild. This compared to LA where unless you are totally balling, in my experience, you pretty much don’t get shit.

        6. Boy…if I were younger, I might give that a shot. Had some bad experiences in Asia. But that gets me thinkin’…hmm.

        7. No. Heh. Had some of those elsewhere though. Got trapped in Beijing once. Had to finally slug Chinamen out of the way, who were standing in line ahead of me at the airport, after being stuck there for several days. Got food poisoning. Ate cow’s head, dog stomach, all kinds of fun stuff. When I got to Hong Kong, I was overjoyed. But Asia’s a big place. I’ve heard Thailand is a pussy fest…what’s your experience with that, HC.

        8. Might have to try it for a weekend one of these days. If you say the pussy is abundant, I’m not gonna question it. Cash is king everywhere. Do most of them have those grating, New Yawk accents? Does everybody crow about the Yang-kees. Or is that a stereotype…

        9. You dont need to make 250k/yr or more to date/get laid in NYC. They wont marry you though

        10. ” They wont marry you though”
          Getting married should not even be in any man’s thoughts today – seriously.
          I don’t care how ‘alpha’ any man is – as soon as he gets hitched, he has surrendered his dignity – and his wife will never respect him – ever.

        11. I gotta agree here. (But you know how I am, Morrison.) Other guys will differ. But…but…women are dignity vampires.

        12. Funny thing I notice is that young people who are making between 60-90k a year are rushing into living together or getting married so they can stop living in squalor and live in a nice place with a combined income. I see it happen quite a lot and almost always see it end badly. I am currently waiting out 2 separate couples in this situation.

        13. I call BS on that. A decent woman will respect you as much as you deserve. You hold up your part, she will do hers. You pick up a whore and marry her, yeah, I see your point. They don’t have any respect for themselves, how could they respect someone else?

        14. Since most women are promiscuous of course she won’t respect a man who marries damaged goods. But virgins are another story.

        15. Do non- married couples qualify for loans for your apartments? If that your call, or the banks’?

        16. “A decent woman will respect you as much as you deserve”
          Decent women? This is 2016 – no decent women to be had. Perhaps, but man I would imagine only rarely – rare enough not to get ones hopes up.

        17. I just rolled off your lead-in my friend (dignity)…grazie, but it was more you than me, I’m thinkin’.

        18. I work in rentals. Married or unmarried we require renters to have 50x the monthly rent in annual salary. If it is different in sales I do not know. I don’t really work on the renting of the apartments side much less sales.

        19. Yup you gotta pay $25 for some retard to pour two or three ingredients into a glass that will probably give you hep c. Fun times.

        20. No decent women to be had? Nice loser mentality. Jim Morrison was a hack who needed drugs to produce anything btw

        21. My wife and I regularly go to NYC and there are places even in Manhattan with happy hour that’s reasonable. I found some amazing places to eat that were affordable via yelp.
          Old timer tip: “Ladies night” doesn’t have ladies (mostly middle aged women out for cheap drinks with their cock-block friends) and a ton of horny men spooking the fish. Same deal with the expensive night clubs: I found them laughable in what a waste of time they are unless you’re an alpha in which case, you can pick up hotter women just going through checkout at the CVS next door.
          “Happy hour” is truly happy: cheap drinks, people are friendly and easier to approach, little noise. Even now, married, my wife and I love happy hour to socialize.

        22. “….as much as you deserve”
          Yes. And I will add that a decent woman will make you want to improve as well.

        23. I don’t know about that. Sounds like rumors of “gold up in dem der hills”. I think every so often a dude like you runs across a genuine nugget, in a field littered with Iron Pyrite. There are good women out there. There are exceptions to every rule. However I think pop culture has lessened the exceptions quite significantly.

        24. more often than not I see it turn into “roommates who don’t fuck but are monogamous and hate each other” Really sad

        25. They are out there, just don’t expect to find your future wife at the club. Try an art gallery or aquarium. I’ve had better results there than at some smokey joint.

        26. it;s like digging through the bargain bin at kmart and hoping an ipod fell in there by accident lolz

        27. Ok then – go ahead and get married if finding a unicorn is that easy – and report back on your experiences.
          And yeah, admittedly, Morrison did have an issue with mainly alcohol – and some of his poetry was ‘out there’.

        28. Funny if all it took were drugs to become a legendary rock star, why are there so many unemployed junkies squatting around. They should all be wealthy rock stars.

        29. Oh ya Morrison’s coke fueled stage antics were so original! Dumbass waving a sweet tea flag, gtfo.

        30. No, I just call bullshit when artists get fucked up onstage and people jerk off to it. Pass me the Jack and the bong, Im going to get artistically inspired.

        31. If you make 50-60 and cook most of your meals you can have your own place + money to spend on bars.

        32. Oh does American history offend you? sorry, oh and i was just trying to be an ashl too, like you, to sort of fit in, im new,btw. Nice to meet you, fuckwad.

        33. Ouch that’s 24K$ a year ( if every weekend @ 500$ ). I know basic idiot math. Just different perspective…that’s four acres of land a year / twenty ounces of gold / 1200 ounces of silver.
          40$…can’t balk at that…..unless go total extreme of ” there is no such thing as extra money.”

        34. Exactly, let’s others show how ballin they are; going broke buying dumbshit. Even better is, if you’re not there too watch.

        35. What does one own / save / invest? Many I’ve gotten back on track got shocked by the conservative 75K$ – 150K$ that went up in smoke in well under a decade. Renting / car under water / lacking of assets. Past fun wasn’t fun no more. It was usually those that made more that under delusions spent more.
          People can live how want. Just dealing with those that hit a wall…disposable income for bars vanished from their vocabulary.

        36. I get compensated in base + heavy bonus, so live on the base, which is healthy, save the bonus. I don’t own much except a sports car and a five figure savings, but this is my first year clocking six figures. I don’t want to own a house until I move to a more affordable city.

        37. Lol. That’s like Leo DiCaprio saying he dates models using normal game. When you’re a westerner in South East Asia you’re high value in the local women’s eyes. At that point you’re not using “normal game” It’s no secret that those Asians like Westerner dick

        38. So why don’t you become successful and start balling? Start a business and make money. It has been done before. Don’t always look for the easy way out

        39. What easy way. I am happy with what I have. I am on a trajectory to early retirement. I live a very tony lifestyle. I can’t see why I’d want to start a business.

        40. I don’t see it as a frivolous waste to enjoy oneself. Quite the contrary: that is the point. It’s like people I see at the gym who are exhausted and in pain every day when they push who forgot the reason they started was to get fit and healthy. I am not living my life so I can work…its the other way around

        41. I’ve had many stopovers in Asia ->Thailand, and Philippines are best.
          Like a strip club with take out

        42. The Doors did quality studio material, at least. Not to be confused with Grateful Dead or Phish.

        43. Try an art gallery or aquarium !? Guess the same “decent women” doesn’t complain of being “bored” of taking care of kinds, home, blah blah blah !!!

        44. if a MAN Can’t find so called “decent women” doesn’t mean a “loser mentality” and that the MAN needs drugs !
          It’s just that it’s damn difficult (or rather, almost, impossible !) to find so called “decent women” OR there aren’t any “real” decent women ! OR some women “project” themselves as “decent”, to get a good looking & high earning “scapegoat”, aka MAN !

        45. It’s not because of their “promiscuous” nature. It’s because women are given “free pass” and they can go un-punished, not held accountable and doesn’t have to face consequences.

        46. Aye. I’m of different perspective. Went part time seasonal up to regional…got sick of it. Now it’s cabin in woods. So if anything just saying keep reserves / dry powder…..just in case get sick of it.
          Also I relate to the rooftop bar. Have a place such as that here. No money or spending it’s equally nice. Jazz / art deco / grand flux of people will never see again.
          As for the gym example…exactly. like when parents taught me how to drink lulz. Drink to have fun, if vomiting / hungover / car wrapped around pole…..not having fun anymore.

        47. Nice. Many don’t have balance. Sorry if projected some encounters I’ve had on your example or you. I’m used to dealing with those that dug a big hole. So built in knee jerk with money for bars / clubs. Some people are addicted to blowing every last dime then maxing out cards to keep the party going.

        48. You were correct in part. I don’t spend much at all at bars, but I do waste a lot of money. I’ve gotten hundreds of dollars of nj and ny parking tickets. I’ve spent money on women, some of them didn’t even hook up with me on the date. I’ve blown a good amount on pot. But I’ve saved a good amount with good credit, and this is the first year that I’m making a few bucks so Halleluja!
          Every year has been different for me financially, but I’ve turned out alright for now. But I well know that in an “at-will” workplace, I can be fired tomorrow because a few people don’t like me and I’d probably be fucked financially.

        49. Find a chick that actually believes in a God of some sort rather than what the media feeds her. Likely a foreign girl, there’s your start.

        50. Perhaps setting up a buffer to weather six months unemployed would be a good target. You acknowledge the risk there, so take them for all worth before / if ever hammer comes down. That is something you have control over, other people not so much. Not being critical…just saying don’t let them potentially rock your boat. Worse happens, you get a vacation and potentially better job.

        51. I learned the hard way that you have to put up a fight when you go out. Every company is scared of litigation. Hover that threat above them as much as you can. Just remember that companies will smile in your face one day and slit your throat in the next.

        52. Got your point and guess every one of us (real MEN !) have same feelings. I am from Bharat or India or Hindustan. Believe me, major percentage of Pussies in my Home Country are “mimicking” their western counterparts ! More and more of the marriages are ending in divorce (obviously benefiting the pussies).
          Anyway, just wanted to comment about the “majority” and the “reality” !!

        53. No society functions according to its exceptions. Compare Condi or Colin to the vast majority of blacks in this country.

        54. It has been so long since I’ve been to one of those all I remember is being hit on by a skank that I wouldn’t touch with a ten foot pole covered in Saran Wrap
          Ok I am exaggerating on the size of my package again

        55. Sure you can, it will cost you though. You have to go to church every Sunday. You have to give up drinking, wild women, etc. you have to pay tithing,volunteer in church callings etc.
          Take a trip to Rexburg Idaho about 50 miles west of Yellowstone. It is a college town of hot young traditional women. Two girls for every guy. Problem is you need to become the part or you won’t get past a first date . Took me about 2 years before I could get a kiss from one. Then I married her.

      3. You sound like you’re meeting Mrs. Robinson at the hotel lounge … any advice for men not making a quarter a mil a year
        roof top bar indeed

        1. Mrs Robinson? No. I have very strict age requirements. There are dozens of lounges in the 20’s along the east side near park ave south that are fun. Shit, Union Square Coffee shop is a bastion of eastern European talent. Lower East Side is loads of busy as is Chelsea. If you want to stay uptown there are loads of places along 2nd ave. that get pretty good. Caledonia, which isn’t too far from you and has an excellent whisky selection, is usually crowded as it Ethyl’s though I would never go in there…not my scene. For me, however, I would still rather pregame with a bottle at home, go out to Madison avenue and cradle a whisky and work on the high end poon. I have never liked the sale rack shit and always have enjoyed fucking the society girls. Save up some dough, dress yourself nicely, pregame a few drinks at home and head to the Carlyle, Bemelman’s Bar, around 1030 pm on a Friday or Saturday night once January comes if you like that kind of stuff.
          I don’t know where to find Asians. But Yorkville, which is right near you, is pretty much a haven for eastern Europeans in the 19-28 range.

        2. cuz if you don’t wear a suit, you ain’t shit
          We’re in totally different circles.
          I can’t stand those rich idle women who want to play dress up like a runway model.

        3. and why idle? A lot of them are MBA working in jobs far more important and stressful than anything going on in academia. They are grown-ups despite age and beauty for the most part.

        4. oh and one last thing. You seem to be unhappy with your circle. We are in different circles. I am happy. Maybe you should consider changing circles.

        5. making sure the finkelsteins’ retirement portfolio is growing so they can enjoy showing off their vericose veins in boca raton isn’t what i consider meaningful work

        6. They mint like 120,000 MBAs (2 yr program) each year compared to like 50,000 phds (5-7 year program) annually. Seems to me getting an MBA is a LOT easier than a doctorate.

        7. You think people with an MBA are doing important work? Like what? Crafting the marketing strategy for Starbucks? The chicken arch deluxe isn’t performing so we’re pulling it from the menu? You needed an mba from harvard to do that?

        8. how you present yourself to the world matters….whether you believe it or not, whether you want it to or not, whether you think it is fair or not. You present an external impression that you will be judged on.

        9. The people who are running the major corporations, the hedge fund people, the lawyers who are doing mergers…….I don’t know…objectively important? In the face of life and death? Probably not. But a fuck load more important than intro to made up bullshit and grading papers for kids who shouldn’t have been allowed out of the 5th grade then writing some essay that you can read at some professional conference while a bunch of people sit around not really giving a fuck and telling you it is great.

        10. It is. And it is also worth a lot more. Imagine that. I have a doctorate. It isn’t worth the paper it is printed on.

        11. I meet a lot of happy people. You aren’t one of them. I am thinking that we have something figured out that you don’t. I hope you figure it out for yourself one day too.

        12. well if you’re saying you use your attire / physical presence it to manipulate people, I will agree with that.
          When I wear a pair of ugly ass black rimmed Birth Control Glasses, I have more credibility as an academic
          But as far as deriving any sense of identity or worth based solely on attire etc, I disagree wholeheartedly with that.

        13. It isn’t just about manipulating people. You express yourself outwardly. You make a conscious choice as to how you present yourself. The first thing that a person will see is the choices you have made in how to present yourself. If your choices were made ironically or with spite or malice or intent to deceive than the people who don’t immediately think you are a fucking shit will be ironic, spiteful, malicious or deceptive. Same if you express yourself outwardly with confidence, hopefulness, positivity etc.

        14. So is the iPhone…but I like it. You don’t want to change your life, you feel you are where you want to be…I am not one to suggest otherwise. I am very happy with my life, I like the people I meet, I enjoy myself and feel secure both in my own skin and in my future. I think that is a great thing. If it isn’t for you then by all means, enjoy — or don’t.

        15. “Express yourself” c’mon you sound like an angsty teenager going to hot topic
          I have nothing to “express”
          I don’t need to wear my faith on my sleeve as the expression goes
          But you’re my favorite rok poster so I still like you

        16. I am the one who sounds like an angsty teenager? Ok, be a filthy slob, a malcontent and someone who mocks those who are doing better. But for crying out loud stop bitching and moaning about women. If this is your attitude I can see why you would think getting top shelf twat is off limits. I was just talking about this with @robertsadler:disqus It is amazing how men think they are somehow entitled to anything good while putting absolutely no work into getting it.

        17. Oh I’m not complaining about women on an individual basis. I’m only interested in terms of society-wide trends, cultural trends. I haven’t pursued women personally in years.

        18. I got to tell you pabst, if you were my son I would beat some fucking optimism into you. As it is, we are just guys on the internet. All I will tell you is that if you are being sincere in your comments — which I genuinely do believe you are — then there is better stuff out there than you are getting and you are young enough and have enough going for you that it would be a real shame to see you not do it. I will leave it at that as you do not seem receptive.

        19. Not to mention, that you send a message with what you wear no matter what you wear. I’m guessing this guy’s attire matches his attitude.

        20. Yeah. Gotta take the world as it is before navigating its waters. Some men will never get that. Most women certainly don’t.
          He sounds a bit like Tom Arrow.

      4. I’d fit in better slurping up water from a trough cheek to jowl with farm animals than hob knobbing with those pretentious fucks arguing over the finer points of cubism.

        1. I don’t know much about people talking about cubism. Most of the people I meet are really fun. They talk about what they know about. I am pretty easy going and get along with almost anyone I meet.

        2. Met rooftop bar is something you should seriously consider. First off it is free. They do one installation per season. Last year it was a life size reproduction of the house from psycho. You can look out over a fantastic view of the park and city. They have a make shift bar with reasonably priced drinks. I think it was 8 bucks for a martini. And there are loads of very attractive women who just go hang out there. It seems your perceptions are informed by something other than the reality, but when the spring comes I would make sure to spend some time up there. There is a very high quality of woman looks wise who aren’t total fucking idiots and usually drinking.

        3. “east is east and west is west and never the two shall meet”
          I think you being a native NY’er you feel more at home in certain settings just as you would probably feel out of place in some redneck dive bar. Not all shells fit all crabs.

        4. If I went to that event, I guarantee you they would go “Ah. The spill is right over here. Where’s your mop?” haha

        5. I didn’t always feel at home in these settings. I am not from the upper east side. I am from bushwick. I felt incredibly awkward in these settings when I first started going. I will tell you, and I mean it, it terrified me. I used to watch bond movies and practice things to do like when to button or unbutton a coat, when to stand, how to gesture. I would read style books. I watch Humphrey bogart and would pause and re watch things he did and things he said and mannerisms he had. Why? Because I didn’t like the life I was born into. It fucking sucked. But I knew that only a few miles a way there was a life I liked more. And it isn’t that the grass is always greener blah blah blah. It is simply a better life. I started and later tanked a career in academia because I thought and later realized I was wrong. I paid attention to people in real life, in movies, people in business. I watched and I learned. I emulated some things, disregarded othrs.
          I don’t feel comfortable where I am because I am a native new Yorker. I feel comfortable where I am because I looked at where I wanted to be and fought to be there. When I see the people who were born to do it I smile and know I am better than them. Their women want me more because they are bored of the guys who were given this life and the fact that I fought for it gives them tingles.
          I have been to many redneck bars. I don’t feel uncomfortable at all. Nor do I change myself. I find that most rednecks will razz me a bit and I will razz them back and in the end the fact that I am happy being me is enough for them and likewise that they are happy being them is fine by me and we get along just fine.
          I would suggest you do something similar my friend. Not that you should do what I did. What I did was part and parcel of what I wanted and that will be different for everyone. But you genuinely sound unhappy with the position you find yourself in. I am telling you that you can pick any position you want and work and getting there. Resigning yourself to a life that doesn’t make you happy, that you aren’t enjoying and that in fact is making you bitter is really sad. You can do whatever you want. When I was a young knee, maybe my sophomore year in high school, I knew exactly who I wanted to be and it was fucking light years from who I was. Now, some three decades later, I am living the life I have wanted and I have to tell you it feels really fucking wonderful. I won’t tell you which life to want. That would be foolish. But it is quite clear from your comments that the one you have isn’t it. So maybe some serious reconsidering.

        6. You know, about 10 years or so ago I bought a white dinner jacket. I thought it was the pinnacle of cool. I put a red pocket square in, black trousers, a white shirt and a black tie. Shiny shoes. Fuck man I felt awesome. I went into a really nice upscale joint and realized I was dressed exactly like the waiters. I was fucking mortified. Shit happens.

        7. Great advice. I am also getting older and bitter within academia. Let’s see where do I end up after graduating…

        8. I bailed with a good job at a decent university. I couldn’t do it. I hated it. I really did. I knew guys who loved it and are in tenured positions now. Everyone is different. The truth is that there is a lot of life out there. The easiest thing in the world to do is the thing you are already doing….even if it fucking sucks. That is why most people do it and that is why people die without ever having done anything great. For me….I took a week and went away…not to go party and do whatever, just to get away. I sat in a really nice hotel, had drinks at the bar, talked to people, ate dinner and thought and thought and thought. What do I want my life to be like. How do I make my life that way. I realized I wanted to be a suit wearing, expensive scotch drinking, model fucking playboy . That was what I wanted. You can say it is shallow or bullshit or meaningless or ill never have kids or blah blah blah but after a few days of reflection I knew…I think I had always known…but I knew it is what I wanted. And I looked at what I was doing. Adjuncting at 4 different schools kissing ass and hoping for a tenure spot to open up while picking up piecemeal work where I could to supplement my income. This was not the way to be what I wanted to be. The way to be what I wanted to be was to go corporate. That was 2004. It is about to turn 2017 and I am a C-Suite officer for a multi-billion dollar company. My work isn’t particularly taxing as it suits my personality and it affords me the opportunity to have the life I wanted. It doesn’t happen by magic. It took a lot. Looking back…totally worth it

        9. ” The easiest thing in the world to do is the thing you are already
          doing….even if it fucking sucks. That is why most people do it and
          that is why people die without ever having done anything great.”
          That is positively haunting….

        10. Are you being fully candid here? I mean are you conveniently omitting some critical pieces to your story? It sounds like a rags to riches Horatio Alger story. How do you pivot from being an academic to managing real-estate? I mean people usually go to Columbia to study real estate so they can look official when handed the reins of the family business. You claim the opposite: a meritocratic rise despite lack of relevant credentials.

        11. I started in the legal department when I was still teaching to make extra money. Academia gave me the ability–one I’m sure you have—to read long boring things and bullet point them so they can be explained to people with no attention span. So I read building code and contracts and other shit. It was decent extra money and mostly stuff I could do late at night.
          I admired some of the people I worked with and am personable and aggressive so I tried to learn. It took a few years but i wound up in operations learning, growing. I got close with the owners. I made a point to study them. Get them gifts they would appreciate on their birthdays and always show I was willing to go above and beyond. Years passed. Promotions happened. Eventually the COO retired. I had been there for a while. Like any smart and capable person who spends a few years at a job you learn to do your bosses work.
          Rather than hire an MBA I asked them to take a chance with a PhD. I left my teaching gigs. Told chairs I wouldn’t need new classes for upcoming semesters. In the first two years I worked like an animal. 10 hour days? 15 hour days? Those first two years I took every meeting, every opportunity, read every report and every spread sheet. 7 days a week. Was it Sunday or was it Wednesday. Eventually I learned how to delegate, trust and use people strategically. Now, some few years after that, the job comes naturally, my employers are happy to have me and friendly with me, i am able to trust my subordinates, get along well with other departments and make myself valuable to the owners.
          It absolutely was rags to riches. Not every part of t was fun. A lot of it sucked. There were times I Thoughy I just be insane. Most of all I remember spending a lot of time thinking everyone would find out that i was faking it and take everything away.
          But those young kids kept pouring out of Columbia and coming to me for internships—they still do.
          Now I have connections all over the city. Lawyers, accountants, Wall Street people, the biggest construction firms, union people. I treat them right, ask about their kids, barter favors. Here I am.
          It wasn’t easy. It wasn’t magic. But I knew what I wanted and did everything I could to get it. Everything. I remember leaving my mothers 60th birthday party at 10 pm to run to a building and deal with an issue. Family, friends, everyone had to take a back seat for those first few years. I would have stepped on anyone for the people who gave me a shot. It’s all about what you want and what you are willing to do to achieve it

        12. That was a very sincere answer. Thank you. That does help to clear some of the fog.
          The last two lines reminded me of Mr.s Burns’ business advice: “I’ll keep it short and sweet. Family, religion, friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business. When opportunity knocks, you don’t want to be driving to a maternity hospital or sitting in some phony-baloney church. Or synagogue.”

        13. It is funny but it’s true. Make no mistake, if it was what was best for the company I would throw you off the side of a building and not lose one minute sleep.
          Homo Faber my friend

        14. Honestly, that is the attitude that anyone should have if they live in New York City. Used to be the same way when i lived in New York. Still am to some extent. Makes it funny when someone expresses shock to hear I’m a New Yorker and don’t ‘have an accent’.

        15. I’ll be re-reading your comment later but currently working on clothing styles now and mine is ass for the most part. I can still pull trim mostly but clothes have always been my bane. Would spend too much and have no general idea as to what goes with what. Heard the Bond movies were excellent models for how to walk and for speaking speeds to apply. Used to model them for acting purposes.

        16. I’m no revolutionary here. Watching the bond movies is how a lot of poor kids learned to do those things. The great irony is that bond is a secret agent. Before that he was in the navy. He was an orphan. He was acting like a man of distinction too…

        17. there is always a price. It is the up and downside to nihilism. You get to be your own God so that’s cool. However you have to be your own God so that’s tough sometimes. Need to create your own universe

        18. Alfani dress shirts my bread and butter. Grey can almost never go wrong. Do go for slim / fitted, cause unless bulky can end up looking like a flying squirrel. Off season / 85% off sale can’t go wrong, no reason to spend over 20$ on a shirt ever.
          I.N.C shirts can be fun, little flash…just don’t get gaudy.
          Sport coat / leather blazer…fits and clearance. 30$ – 60$. Thrift stores / resale can be good for leather. Oh and a sport coat is just that, a sport coat…thick weave / heavy / durable. Not what would consider hunting / shooting gear…yet that is / was origin and purpose. Don’t button bottom button and do take the brand name tag off the sleeve.
          Black / blue jeans. Fits.
          This isn’t queer eye for the straight guy. Just my budget advice for Bond / Italian Mobster/ Russian asshole.
          Oh, if everything is locked down…shirt is always where can get flashy with colors / prints when / if monochromatic gets old.

        19. “It’s better to hang out with people better than you. Pick out associates whose behavior is better than yours and you’ll drift in that direction.”

        20. “I’ll tell you what I do like though: a killer, a dyed-in-the-wool killer. Cold blooded, clean, methodical and thorough. Now a real killer, when he picked up the ZF-1, would’ve immediately asked about the little red button on the bottom of the gun. “

        21. With the wonder of the internet I once went to someone burned long ago. The first thing they said to me was ” you’re the most psychotic man I’ve ever met.” Expressed my intent was soul searching related. They seemed a bit dissapointed in me oddly enough, told me that’s my nature and why like me. That really got me…then naturally burned them again after screwing around…cause the switch of requiring anything of them flipped off.

        22. Another good quote. Same goes with weightlifting, playing chess and pretty much anything

        23. Didnt he do many things wrong because he didnt know any better?
          Shaken not stirred, for starters.

        24. Yes sir! I wrote a paper on it in college. Shaken not stirred is the Big one but wrong wine vintages metal spoons with caviar. I love that Fleming wrote it that way. When we see bond in his own apartment he is eating a roast beef sandwich over the sink!

      5. I have a theory that the reason why NYC is such a good spot for men and a terrible spot for women in terms of dating is because too many women watched Sex and the City, watched movies like The Devil Wears Prada, shows like Friends, etc. All those sell a fantasy NYC to women. Every romantic comedy has the hot career girl who’s killing it in the Big City but just can’t seem to find Mr. Right until Patrick Dempsey comes along. Every girl watching that sees the excitement of having a cool job in a cool city, living in a loft with exposed brick, and being around sharp and attractive people and they connect that fantasy not to “the big city” but to NYC SPECIFICALLY. There is no corresponding adolescent NYC fantasy for men. So a lot more impressionable girls moved there than men and the numbers favor the men heavily.

        1. I don’t doubt that this plays some role. I think the numbers are in men’s favor too. I can’t remember walking into a bar and seeing more single men than women. And not by a small margin. Further, a good number of the younger women 22-30 living here are transplants from other places and thye haven’t adjusted yet so they are going nuts. This doesn’t just make things easier with them but it makes their competition step up the game. Two last things: sex here is openly encouraged. There are random stores that just have fish bowls of NYC branded condoms for free. The attitude towards sex here is generally casual. Girls who come here with other feelings soon adapting to local customs. Add to this the insane amount of stress that working and living in new York brings which makes young people need to blow off a lot of steam. We are also a very drinking city. Walk around any neighborhood in the afternoon on a sunday. Everyone is at least buzzed. Finally, I find that because getting laid here is very easy that the guys have become very lax with game so if you add decent game to the equation it becomes even easier.
          One last thing: knowing how to hunt. I will not get laid at a huge EDM club. I am too old, get annoyed quick and that isn’t what those girls are looking for. I know the kind of girls who like corporate guys and where they spend time trying to hook up with them for one reason or anyone.
          All that and, of course, the tv fantasy you mention leads it to be very easy here I find.

    2. Agreed NYC is a ridiculously easy place to get laid. LA is a shithole, I can’t imagine why anyone would want to live there.

      1. “Agreed NYC is a ridiculously easy place to get laid.”
        Laid by what? Unless one is willing flaunt material resources at her or give the impression you’re loaded. The impression I am getting is that in NYC if one wants a hottie then you’ll have to have a gram of coke on you – otherwise if one is just an average Joe than he will most likely have to settle for fucking a 6 or less.

        1. I don’t have coke on me ever. The thing about women in New York is that they greatly outnumber the men and the men that are there are 25% hipster faggots and 50% afraid of how pretty the women are. You can’t be a slob and expect to score high quality women. But if you take care of your appearance and have good game you will get laid by NY 8-9. As a side note, NY 6 is pretty much an 8 everywhere else in the country.

        2. Getting laid is a numbers game and NY has the best numbers in the US and probably the most variety in the world. There are probably better specific markets for certain guys that might appeal more to you, but cetetris paribus, overall I don’t think there is a better city for chasing pussy.

        3. almost all young women are into drugs and that is a FACT: weed, ecstasy, cocaine etc. Why do you think they enjoy doing stupid shit like karaoke or clubbing? They’re all tripping balls when they do that.

        4. I totally agree. NYC is a great place to chase pussy. At least, women are thinner than elsewhere in the country. However, women don’t really outnumber men. Besides what you pointed out of faggots, the main reason it is easy to get laid in NYC is because women adopt a “sex in the city” mindset. Women really like hiding in the anonymity of NYC.

        5. I don’t have demographics numbers on it only anecdotal evidence. But every time (literally every time) I go out I find that 70% of the room is women.

        6. Coke/weed might help in certain circles, but it’s by no means necessary. At all. Just be fly and be bold. Stand strong, speak loud, clear, and strong. Basic charisma. Don’t be a sissy. Basic grown man shit. You will get ass in NYC. I’m 45, I do well. Different ages, ethnicities, body types, scenes. You don’t need cash, but you do have to represent yourself to others in a masculine manner.

        7. “I’m 45, I do well. Different ages, ethnicities, body types, scenes”
          Ok – but if you don’t mind my asking, how pretty are these women i.e. of the women you have banged in NYC what famous actresses or models do they most closely look like?

        8. I don’t fuck women who look like celebrities. And if I were to, I wouldn’t know it anyway because I don’t run that comparison when I meet a gal.
          Why do you ask?

        9. The reason I ask – and I do so respectfully, is because I want to establish some kind of aesthetic standard – i.e. beauty factor. I knew a guy who was going on about all the hot chicks he was banging, and it turns out he had a warped perspective. The dude was plugging literally super fatties and ugs. To give you an idea check out this video clip from Shallow Hal – this was like him : https://youtu.be/K4j25DUQLgE
          I’m not asking if you’ve banged a chick that looks like “supermodel so-and-so” but rather what well known female personalities look like the girls you’ve been with. There is no sense in going on about how easy it is to fuck women in nyc when the females in question that guys are getting with are, what I would consider, to be snouts and entrails.

        10. My answer is going to be long-winded. Mostly for any younger motherfuckers trying to get their groove on. Also to make myself clear.
          First, I’ll answer directly. Just in the past six months, I’ve hit a range from mid-20s Manhattan white girl dimepiece to mid-30s Caribbean thick single mommy. So, no, not hitting 8s and shit consistently. I don’t give a fuck. For the record. I get horny, I want to hunt, chase, and kill. I do what I do. Then I go back to doing me, feel me?
          Now, I’ll explain something as best I can. I may be going from a completely different operational model than you and many others. For me, what gets me off most is not looks per se, but the feeling of domination. The natural kind. The man to woman kind. That look on her face of total submission, where they go from pain in the ass to devoted slave. When I’ve fucked her mind and her orifices properly. When she starts catching feels, making me food and shit, wanting to know “how I’m doing” all the fuckin time, asking me what I want her to wear. I eat that shit up.
          Here’s the deal. When I’m just middle-of-the-bell-curve, low-energy, self-talk noise, etc. etc., the caliber of woman who submits might be below your aesthetic standards. 5, 6 range. When I’m feeling lean, aggressive, magic-man, open…in other words, when I’m “on”, the caliber of woman who submits to me kicks up accordingly. 7 mostly.
          Maybe just to tie this all in the original post – I agree that NYC is a great place for a young Lothario to make paper and to learn the game. But this place treats old 5’7″ fucks like me well too.

        11. Your criteria works, I hear ya.
          My criteria is different – and I’m not saying my criteria is better than yours – just that we both look for slightly different things.

      2. Agreed 100%. If I had 750 million dollars I would def get myself a place in LA. Short of that, can’t see every wanting to live there.

        1. 750 Million. I can’t really imagine what I’d do at that stage. Something to ponder. I expect to enter the grave around 10 Million.

    3. yeah they’re on their smartphones or listening to music. They sure as fuck aren’t waiting for some stranger to talk to them.

        1. If you are holding a woman’s attention she will not look at her smartphone. When she pulls out her smart phone she is signaling to you that she is not fucking interesting. Might as well just punch out right there. I told someone that I rarely see dates look at their phone. Maybe when I go to the restroom and I am walking back and they always put it away fast. A woman needs to have her very flaky attention span held into focus. If you are holding her attention she will not be looking at her phone….consequently, you will be seeing her naked.

        2. Absolutely. I guess they’re almost a blessing now: In the age of the Iphone there’s never any question as to whether you’re holding someone’s attention.
          I think Mr. Sunshine above was bemoaning the difficulty of breaking through in the first place; waiting for some dimwit to pull her face out of her phone for a moment.

        3. As us gym nuts say: Of course it is hard. If it was easy we’d call it your mom.
          It is true about the iPhone. It is like Sonny’s door test. If that bitch pulls out the iPhone while you are talking just move on. Walk right out in the middle of a date. Don’t even stop. Politely say goodbye and splitzo. If she is looking for her iPhone then she is bored with you. If she is bored with you then you already lost. All you are doing by sticking around is playing out the inevitable.

        4. ” If it was easy we’d call it your mom.”
          I love that.
          Didja ever notice that Puerto Ricans have absolutely no tolerance for “yo momma” jokes?

        5. I haven’t…ha ill have to put it to the test.
          I have a hoodie that says “If Squats were easy they’d call them your mom” and another one that says “If Deadlfits were Easy They Would Call it The Treadmill”

        6. aaaaaaaaaand she might just come up with some in situ kung fu moves when snatching that mobile! You’d think that the phone is a vital organ the way they carry it around!

    4. Everyone in this comment thread: award yourselves a “w”. Well said all around.

    5. The obvious question of course is…why bother?
      Most bitches are toxic anyway.

    1. I love that girl in the top photo, I want to orbit her, and buy her cars and shoes, and sit on the curb outside her place, night and day, and…and…nah.

        1. Hey you have to read this guy’s story. Morrison (ROK reader) passed me this link. This guy is the ballsiest dude you have read about in a long time, I guarantee it. And what a cool story. It will perk you right up and make you feel glad to be a man –
          http://www.bbc.com/travel/stor

        1. I’d be afraid I’d crack her pelvic bones. For like, a tenth of a second before I started bangin’ her.

        2. Solid lower chassis, you could beat it like a screen door in a hurricane without wear to frame.

    1. Here’s a good one. “How to regularly afford blue hair dye on a Starbucks salary”. hahaha

        1. gotta love the end. That girl is genuinely excited to have him clean the champagne he sprayed in her hair by dunking her head in the toilet. If you follow him (he is a party photographer and makes a living pouring champagne on half naked girls and throwing bologna at them) he posted a fucking thank you email. This girl didn’t just enjoy it drunk. She work up, sobered up and still felt proud.

    2. It’s easier to conquer Afghanistan than it is to find a decent women that isn’t crass, a behemoth, thinks acting/looking/thinking masculine is “cool” or shitsmeared by X-number of lowlife schmucks in her past these days.

      1. Nobody conquers Afghanistan. Alexander The Great, The British Empire, The Soviet Union. The United States…. Afghanistan is where empires go to get humiliated.

        1. Genghis Khan did. Soviets would have if the US didn’t intervene. Afghans are mountain savages that die just as easily as anyone. All it takes is more resolution than most invading armies have. If Trump wanted to, Afghanistan could be under his boot in 12 months or less.

      2. I cannot argue with that one. “Decent woman”. I think that’s a myth, brought ’round again and again during Christmas, via holiday films. To make guys wish. Never met one so far. Might happen (guffaw).

        1. my secretary is a Pakistani girl who is constantly showing me pictures of girls she is related to in one way or another who live in Pakistan and telling me how good my life would be with a traditional Pakistani wife. lol

        2. If you married a Pakistani girl her brothers would cut her head off.
          And they’d be really pissed off at you.

        3. The Quiet Man has another scene just as good. I am not for hitting a woman, but dammit sometimes you need to show them what power is. Wrestling is my favorite, let them think they are winning and then just surprise them with how much strength you have.
          My wife is fairly tall (5’11”) she always thought she was pretty strong. She is, for a girl. It is laughable though if she tries to do some physical competition. I think it made her realize how dumb those self defense classes are for women.

        4. Bob…heh. I am still laughing here. Fuck, I’m going to print this out and carry little copies with me. Leave ’em at strip clubs along with the tip before I split. Ha!

        5. I don’t know. She tells me I would have to convert. I told her, jokingly, sure I can be a muslim…but I will just be a fucking terrible muslim. Like the worst, whiskey drinkin’st, pork eatin’st muslim every.

        6. I can be the American Talleyrand. I was thinking, however, of being Henri IV
          Vive ce Roi vaillant
          Ce diable à quatre
          A le triple talent
          De boire et de battre
          Et d’être un vert galant
          De boire et de battre
          Et d’être un vert galant

        7. The red head in that movie was one of the best looking broads I’ve ever seen…

      1. Hoe-hoe-hoe…(wink). Or is that “ho”. I don’t want to spell it incorrectly and piss off some slut.

  4. This is a concept that is foreign to me. During my high school years, I was in a small (less than 300) town. Reputations preceded you. In high school, I took out just about everyone over a 4 in my class (except my twin sister). Hard to not be friend zoned when you been already hanging out since grade school.
    Jr college was better, still I had problems running into old girlfriends and other awkward situations. There were several bars, but only one meat market club.
    Later on, when I got religion and moved to college, things were much better. Although I was in a bigger community, the church program had a group of about 200 or so young women to choose from. Reputations were still vital to uphold.

  5. Anyone have any experience in Chicago on this front? I was in Chicago one time a while back but I walked into a pre arranged situation. I met up with two guys I had known a long time who were locals, they told their friends their “crazy friend” from nyc was coming to down for a weekend and I walked into a prepackaged weekend long party where it was like I immediately knew everyone around me. I have no experience of just going there cold, getting a hotel and spending a few days.
    I had a lot of luck in Georgetown btw. This was early ’00’s and I was there for 5 days by myself. Met a lot of cute girls and had a ton of fun.

    1. I’ve been to Chicago with my ex a few years ago and we loved it. Mind you it was May and weather was great. It’s horrendous there this time of year (like minus 20!)

      1. I could never live that far inland, but my visit was fun. I sometimes think about getting a hotel room by my self for a long weekend, hitting up some steak houses, bars and talking to some local bints.

        1. When will you be entering the celibacy part of your routine, by the way ? Slut season is coming to an end if I remember well.

        2. It is coming to an end. THe problem is that I really enjoy slut season. Normally I would end right after the polar bear swim on Jan 1. But I am kind of having fun right now. Will have to see what happens.

        3. or, in terms you might better understand: “lord give me chastity….but not yet”

        4. It is entertaining to think that the creatures you’ve put in the most shameful positions will later in life be seen as “wife material” by some poor bastard.

        5. I have seen girls that I have been with months or even years later (in one case decades later) with their boyfriends and/or husbands. I always have a little smile. One of my favorites though. I was at a coffee shop and saw a girl I used to, er, ehm, date some years back. She had kept herelf in really good shape. Was living with a guy and was engaged to be married. She told me that she had a fish named lolknee and her fiancé had no idea it was about a former lover.
          We wound up getting….er…..reacquainted that afternoon. Never exchanged numbers or anything. Sent her on her way.

    2. Chicago native here. Yes winter sucks here but summers are a lot of fun. I think mainly because people live it up due to the shortness of it. Now the women…the bad part about a short bikini season is there are a bunch of porkers, plus it’s the midwest. There are cute girls here but a lot of them are coupled up already-that’s one big difference from NYC where I’m told you’ll find more single people. I know if I see a hot girl there’s a very high chance she’s got a dude already.
      Many women here are from other states nearby as well like Michigan, Iowa, Wisconsin, etc… They can be more down to earth at first but tend to get more entitled as time goes on if they live in the city proper. The trick is catching girls new to town from these places before the get tainted.

      1. see, I like tainted girls and down to earth is usually a turn off to me. It sounds, from what you say, that Chicago is the kind of place that you want to meet a hot woman and pair off with her and have a little relationship rather than meet a dozen hot women a month and bone 6-8 of them and maybe once in a while keep one in rotation for a month or two

        1. Right-that’s pretty accurate to what I do here. I have a couple girls on rotation at any given time. I’ve not delved into the online dating or apps like tinder so I can’t speak on those. I meet girls the old fashioned way at bars, the gym, social circle, etc…

        2. exact same. Recently, out of curiosity, I gave tinder a try. Day one had a fucking disaster. I have promised some I would write it out with screen shots of the texts but have simply been to lazy to do it. Deleted right after. I don’t get the online thing. I miss meeting girls at the gym. That was such a fertile hunting ground. I have moved, however, from my bougie upscale gym to a serious barbell club where there is very old school equipment and no women.

    3. Midwest in general is much more laid back. Quite frankly, the way most men dress in NYC would get them laughed at in the Midwest. The pocket square in the breast pocket would get one labeled as a light in the loafers poofer in the Midwest for sure.

      1. yeah, I get that the Midwest isn’t quite as civilized. Some people like that some people don’t. I would never live there. I also don’t like laid back.

        1. yes they run through the woods with their dick in one hand and a chalice of wine in the other … like a satyr

    1. I think that the real problem is that they are plenty easy to find but not in the places that a lot of guys here would want to look. Wanting your cake and eating it too is for feminists and children. If you want to find that special traditional girl move yourself out to rural Pennsylvania and become amish. You can’t have everything and men need to make a choice. What is it you want? If what you want is that decent traditional girl go get it, but don’t think you can just be going to clubs and bars and taking down poon left and right while you look. Look at @disqus_68anDuoclq:disqus church group, small population, the whole thing. These girls are not rare. What is rare is finding them while you are out whoring. This is like complaining that you never catch any bass while you are running track and field.

      1. Yes, I get the feeling guys are complaining that when theyre out whoring the town, theyre just running into skanks. Not going to find wife material out at da cluh.

      2. No, it’s not too much to expect a non-slut wife and a good career. Millions of Asian men have both a gf / wife who has only fucked them AND a solid career in finance or tech.
        I guess only white men have to resort to a life of barn raising in order to find a non slut female.

        1. I have slept with some for one reason or another…most recently one who was wealthy and drove a really cool car and had a penchant for very, very expensive lingerie but in general me no likey

        2. that’s ok. Loads of different brands of women. Enjoy the ones you like. For me it is dark wavy brown hair and blue eyes on white skin…aka: the Parisian look.

        3. I’m a PPP club member, and admitted snob. I like perfect, pretty pussies above all other female physical attributes..

        4. And the eyes…dear god, those eyes…like a shark’s eyes…a doll’s eyes (and freakin’ slanted).

        5. Hee. They smell, too. Like…I don’t know. Bruce Lee’s aunt or something. Can’t put my finger on it. Or in them, either.

        6. That’s a misconception. Northeast (And some southeast too) Asians are really White, often times whiter than Caucasians. In Asia, white skin is prized whereas in the West, the women all go to tanning to look like a piece of rawhide.

        7. I do like one Asian, what’s that name…Chick Korea? Helluva a musician. Corea, yeah. That’s it.

        8. Actually, if they tape a piece of thread horizontally across the middle of their eye they make a natural cross fire.

        9. Asian culture resists feminism. Of course they have wife material. Asian women work to find their husband while at college. Not so with the females of other races.

        10. Yes. white women buy into the sex and the city nonsense that they fuck around during their 20s and 30s and 40s and then get Mr. Big at 50. Laughable

        11. yes its funny like that.
          Whiter usually means upper class..
          Some dress toe to nose to avoid tanning in extreme heat, or at least sit in the shade.
          Adjacent to western women who are lying in the sun to tan.
          TV Adds feature many skin whitening products, etc..

        12. Yep, Asians will routinely carry parasols too. Joke’s one the white ladies who will end up looking like leather at 30. Coming up on 30 myself and being wrinkle free, no crow’s feet etc makes me feel grateful i stayed out of the sun too.

        13. Nothing in particular. I just don’t find them sexually appealing in general.

        14. You must not have spent much time on the west coast. Northern California is full of good asiatic pussy.

        15. I was in San Fran for a week in 96. But really how can it matter. If I have no attraction to Asians than really pretty Asians are just the prettiest version of a girl I don’t find attractive

        16. Skin bleaching was big in Japan. And the models would all be whiter than I was. And they’d all have red hair. It was actually kinda horrifying, tbh. They look like mutants.

        17. Bing image search at the link below – “Korean women” – switched to moderate content filtering, no porn images (don’t want to upset any sensitive snowflakes who might peruse this thread ) –
          http://www.bing.com/images/search?q=korean+women&qs=n&form=QBILPG&pq=korean+women&sc=8-12&sp=-1&sk=
          Some of those Korean girls look fairly Westernized, in the eyes. But a good portion of them look kind of slanty, to me. I think there might be some variation there, but I’m no physical anthropologist by any stretch.

        18. Koreans are, and I mean this in the nicest of ways, an extremely blended people. As opposed to the Nips who are insanely homogeneous.

        19. its amazing – I love their natural beauty -long black hair perfect skin.
          But the advertising makes them insecure – “unless you have whiter skin and red hair…”
          In the west, browner skin and fatter…
          Thailand chicks would put talcumpowder on their faces to appear whiter skin – -looks ridiculous

        20. ASIA : white skin = you are not labouring in the fields all day = status
          WEST : white skin = not spending enough time summering in the Hamptons = lack of status

      3. Central America is a big open ground that many folks overlook. Lots of pretty rich girls, religious, virgins, etc. Easy with white-game, a little difficult logistics-wise (live with parents until marriage, need legitimate commitment)
        Even has merits if you just want to hook-up as well.

  6. Its not hellish to date (and get laid occasionally) in NYC; however, its really hard to find a long term girlfriend, too many options, until they all dry up of course

  7. All of America is hell for dating. Hooking up however is a hell of a lot easier in big cities because there are way more options.

  8. The great thing about visiting NYC besides the sheer amount of pussy per square mile is that it’s very easy to present as wealthy. Mass transit takes care of cars and a spendy hotel becomes your cred.

    1. years ago when I was still young I would stay in and save up or go to cheap bars on the LES and after 3 or 4 months take a swanky hotel for a weekend and live it up like a pro.

  9. There shouldn’t even be a “dating scene”. This is a new phenomenon. For the majority of human existence you just got married. No dating. And no divorce.
    No wonder everyone is miserable.

    1. You can google it, but the modern dating scene was a form of pseudo prostitution and treated as such a century ago even with arrests. “Free dinner” was a way for a lower class girl to save money and johns paid her way. During the roaring 20’s, sexual mores were looser and it become stylish even with upper class women. Then movies codified it into romance. Then in the 90’s, Clinton coined the term “Lewinsky” and a new form of sluttiness was normalized.
      Socialism (in a different era) a century ago came up with the idea, yes, a new idea of restricting women from the workplace to help drive up wages. Why have women work in a factory to just pay daycare? The feminists opposed this and they were funded by… factory owners! The idea was to make society more efficient by having women spend more time at home, use less services, and the economy would hum along (and did.)
      Dating previously did happen but under supervision and geared towards marriage. There were numerous social events such as church festivals, dances (where people danced TOGETHER!), charity events, and parades where men and women checked each other out and while men initiated, usually, women deliberated advertised themselves as available for courtship (knowing they had a biological clock).

      1. Your first paragraph is like the plot of Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Its exactly how she was living.

        1. My Lithuanian friend had his daughter court a guy she met at his house. He even gave the guy beer (not too much) and the daughter watched TV, relaxed around the yard, etc. with him and they went for walks in the park, etc. Nothing terrible. Just “hanging out.”
          So instead of him throwing money at her, they just spent time studying, talking, going to each other’s families, etc. and married straight out of college.
          The dinner-date paradigm is a whore’s game. I’m going to encourage my daughter to stay away from it. Heck, I cook better than most restaurants anyway.

      2. Now that pseudo-prostitution has killed the entire concept of courtship and replaced it. It’s a fucking disaster. Now, parents find the idea of marrying off their 20 y/o daughters creepy, but they don’t have a problem with letting her loose to ruin herself on the SMP by “dating.” It’s hilarious that social conservatives decry the “hookup culture” because it killed the “tradition” of dating.

        1. Hahaha! My conservative brother and sister-in-law chided me for not being “conservative” in that I didn’t think men should wine and dine women during courtship.
          Later, it shocked many of them when I suggested it should be the opposite: That the woman’s family should wine and dine HIM (not for him to milk the hospitality, of course) but rather to provide a safe, neutral setting where the couple can interact and enjoy each other’s company.
          When I went to Eastern Europe, I learned that a man (or woman) shouldn’t visit someone’s home without bringing flowers for the lady of the house, and then it’s expected to invite them in for tea before going out and to have a brief chat. Not an interrogation like many fathers do to their daughter’s suitors.
          I think a lot of this is due simply to ignorance and it’s hard for someone to learn without actually interacting with people in their culture rather than being tourists in some hotel and hitting landmarks.

    2. there is no such thing as a dating. A woman is either sexually exclusive and in a committed relationship or she is single. Any guy that is “dating” a modern girl is basically taking his turn with her when other guys aren’t.

        1. They actually are quite exclusive (for varying amounts of time) until/unless they get bored/bitchy/you don’t keep it under control.

      1. Just a small change !
        Any girl that is “dating” a modern guy is basically taking her turn with him when other girls aren’t. !!!

    3. True. Nearly everyone in the dating game is chewed by anxiety or outright miserable.
      My pal divorced last year. He’s single, good job, always popular with girls. Typically running 3 simultaneously. But happy? No!!
      The dating game is a battle royale with everyone out to kill each other
      He sometimes describes it like the 7th circle of hell

      1. Dating has two forms.
        1) The form this site endorses, a psychological battle/competition with women.
        2) Being interviewed and judged by women as to one’s worthiness.
        When neither is appealing or worth it for the results, there’s little reason to participate.

  10. I’m an old timer so I don’t know today’s dating scene, but it doesn’t sound much different than what I experienced 30 years ago. A few things to note:
    Back then, EVERY man had “daygame” because there was little else. There was no online dating. Women did NOT like online dating at first because it made rejection easier for men.
    Demographics favored women in these cities even moreso than now. There were more older (eligable) Baby Boomer men for (fewer) Gen-X women hitting the market. It was a perfect storm for women back then.
    Next, the notion of a biological clock seemed far off for them. They took it for granted that they would find a decent man by 35 so they could play the field. The media lied to them that this didn’t really exist. Also, the economy was booming unlike today.
    I think there’s probably more “feedback” to young women to set their expectations more realistically now, than then, but the sheer inertia of the culture discourages women from confronting these truths (kind of like taking the red pill but for women) There’s a saying that revolution appears impossible until it becomes inevitable and obvious and I think we’re at this cusp.
    I don’t think a “mediocre” man should feel it’s unrealistic to find a “decent” woman. The reason this is so tough in the city is perhaps because “decent” women in the culture are soon claimed by the age of 25 or so and rarely go out to clubs. It’s like trying to find a nun working at a stripclub.
    In regards to L.A. My observation is that like DC, it has a lot of ethnic women who aren’t attractive. The Latina women rarely look like Telemundo serial stars and there’s a flood of foreign men out to compete for the few attractive women who aren’t strung out on meth yet.
    My advice to young men would be that being “mediocre” isn’t enough, in this culture, but simply knowing some red pill truths is sufficient. Don’t waste too much time trying to convert unconvertable b*tches into girlfriend material. If you’re reasonably tall (and if not, get some horse steroids while you’re young and get some height) and have a decent sounding job on your profile, then that should be more than enough to get in the door with several “decent” women (by American standards.) Have a car that runs, is clean, and know how to make conversation and stand up for yourself and you can bang several reasonably attractive women after just a few inexpensive dates. After you bang ’em, they have zero hold over you, they know it, and then you can start training the trainables or discard them after you tell them that marriage is out ot the picture. Keep it “wrapped”, don’t share passwords, and document your relationship meticulously. Don’t dump them angry (allow them to lose interest after you say marriage is out for some reason with yourself) and they’ll move on and won’t smash your stuff.
    Looking back, I’m a 4 and I could have dated and even married an American 7 with some serious money but I opened my mouth too much before “closing the deal.” Keep in mind they’ve been raised poorly and can’t handle red pill honesty but will respond (positively) to feedback the more deeper they get into it with you.

    1. The average woman spends her late teens/ 20’s being banged by strangers. The pool of decent women is very small by 25. Colleges are feminist slut factories.

    2. solid advise:
      “After you bang ’em, they have zero hold over you, they know it, and then you can start training the trainables or discard them after you tell them that marriage is out ot the picture. Keep it “wrapped”, don’t share passwords, and document your relationship meticulously. Don’t dump them angry (allow them to lose interest after you say marriage is out for some reason with yourself) and they’ll move on and won’t smash your stuff.”
      Except they are still drinking and partying into their 50s in NYC

  11. This article makes no sense considering the word “dating” was replaced by hook-up culture about 10 years ago. Dating is for beta males who pay for the dinners while she gets banged by another male. Learn game or go mgtow.

  12. No disrespect intended but we’ve heard all this before. None of this is new. The manosphere is full of guys complaining about how things are, going on Red pill rages and such.
    This is for any guy: I get the red pill rage, but there comes a point when you have to accept that you’ve been lied to. I’ll give the author a pass because he is relatively young, and maybe just seeing this stuff now. But for the rest of you who are still complaining after so many years, let me ask you, what have you done recently for yourself?
    If you are still complaining after a certain point, it is because you are still invested in your own mind. Society was a scam artist that sold you a worthless stock when you were young and you found out. But you still want it to be worth something. My advice: let it go already. You will only be free when you do that and until then, they still “have you” so to speak. Let it go.
    There is a blind spot in this whole self-improvement notion. For who exactly we do this? Ourselves or for the collective? I do it for myself. I got my education for my own material comfort. I go to the gym for my health and well-being. I fly sport planes and float planes and I fish (right off the float plane) because those are my hobbies.
    Everything else, money, pussy, adventure, my physique and toys are just secondary and tertiary benefits. They are not vital to my survival and I can survive anywhere in the world. Survival is the meaning of life for all animals. Pursue that alone and selfishly and you will be just fine. But never make pussy the destination. It’s along for the ride at best.

    1. I suspect red pill rages drive the web traffic stats on manosphere sites. But red pill theory without game is theory without application.

      1. And what happens when you don’t get results? Failure is an inevitable a part of life. If pussy is your end goal then you will be a slave to it. My friend, to be free, you must be willing to walk away from the table.

        1. I’m not a slave to money or fitness and yet they are goals
          Do you suffer from an addictive personality

        2. I don’t know what ‘addictive personality’ is but if you find me addictive, well I’ll take that as a compliment.
          There’s nothing wrong with goals and achieving things but it’s important to have the right perspective. Too many men put themselves into this one dimensional mode and then seek out game, or MGTOW as some sort of quick fix. They say, I’ll do A, B and C and then I’ll get the money, then the pussy etc… And then it becomes part of their identity. You’re the guy with all the girls. The fancy house. You end up becoming your car, the clothes you wear.
          And then life hits you with a curb ball. Maybe you get divorced. Maybe its a serious health issue. Maybe you get sued. You end up losing some or all of those things you worked for. And some men can’t handle that and they lose their shit. One thing is for certain. The novelty of pussy will wear off as you get older.
          What I am saying is that it’s meaningless and ultimately trivial to survival. The things I have are things that I like and I enjoy them, but they are not who I am and I can live without them if I had to. I have no stock or faith in them because they have no inherent value in that sense. I’m from Toronto. I don’t care if a woman is cold and stuck up, she’s ultimately trivial to my end goals anyway. If she wants to hang around, well then she only gets to as long as I allow it.
          It’s not the goal, but the mindset behind the goal that I take issue with. This is what is holding men back I believe.

        3. I agree with this completely. There has always been something missing about the manosphere concept for me. A lot of it has helped, but sometimes I wonder what it all means if I just get angry or feel hopeless because of the state of dating.
          The biggest takeaway from all this, for me anyway, is to not get frustrated when some girl either doesn’t want me or pulls some shit.
          I’d like to continue to take an approach where I do things because I want to and like things because they are the things I like. I’m somewhat of a neo-Aristotelian and value his virtue ethics and views on friendship and happiness. That is the goal I tend to work to is to continue to better my relationships with friends and invite them to better themselves and find things that make them happy.

        4. I stopped caring about the state of dating long ago. It is what it is, let it go. It’s better to be a selfish prick and enjoy your toys or whatever it is you have. We didn’t create the situation in the west, but it will surely destroy itself in due time. I care nothing to save it. It is only when balkanization comes and they ask western men to fight on mass will those men be in a position to make demands. But until then? I don’t know. Won’t happen in our lifetime.

        5. ” I’m from Toronto. I don’t care if a woman is cold and stuck up, she’s ultimately trivial to my end goals ”
          Toronto is one of the worst places on planet Earth to be meeting women, so it makes sense to hear your philosophy – a soul destroying harsh environment can make a man re-think what is important in life.

        6. I left Toronto long ago. It wasn’t just the women but everything else too. The traffic, the noise, the culture or lack thereof. I much prefer the country and smaller towns and cities. The people there are more relatable I find. Toronto will destroy the soul. How you come back is the bigger question.
          The way I see it, a guy has 2 options. You can either try to conform to what others want, run yourself through the gauntlet of trying to beat out others for the ‘prize’, or, you can do your own thing and have others conform to you. Fools will run through hoops trying to get with girls and you see this all over Toronto in clubs and bars and what not. I mean, we know because we know the game and we know the score. But for the majority of men, manhood is a sorry state of affairs and men will make fools of themselves to try and get with used out women who bring nothing to the table. Then after a night of being frustrated, many will just go and get a prostitute. There’s no pride, no standards, no sense of self-worth. It’s all gone to shit and the titanic is sinking.

  13. It all comes down to Sexual Market Value (SMV). Girls aren’t necessary better in foreign countries. They are girls after all and ALL girls think in the same frame of things. Sure, the Brazilian garota from a small village may not be concerned by Instagram whoring, but she’s still a female and she will do what is necessary to increase the chances of her offspring’s survival. When you stress that foreign girls are “easy” or they are way better than Western women, that’s simply not true. It just so happens that your SMV is higher than most of the men that she’s around because you happen to be an American citizen. You are her golden ticket to one day escaping the hell-hole of a country that she currently lives in. Why do you think mail order bride systems exist in Ukraine and Russian for fat, bald, and socially awkward Americans? It’s because the green card is the golden ticket. Hence, these men’s SMV just went up a notch compared to the other local men that are fighting for her approval. At the end of the day, it all comes down SMV.

    1. All women want to marry up, but not all cultures support the rampant promiscuity of hypergamy run amok like the west.

    2. I do not agree.
      The problem is that feminism tells women that they need no man.
      So there is surplus of men simply bcause plenty of women stay at home alone.

    3. 1. Women are better in foreign countries. They are not brainwashed by American (((media, ZuckerSpiegel, fattening foods, and SJW culture))) Don’t underestimate how crucial it is to have that missing from her environment. A good amount of them are taught to be home-makers, and even ones that are educated with their own careers want to get married and have children.
      2. Yes SMV applies everywhere, and it can apply in our favor for the countries that you referenced. But Italy? India? Singapore? Try getting laid as a foreigner over there. You need social circle and family references with more collectivist cultures.

  14. I think it has to do with bars, too. I could never pick up girls in bars. But I had decent luck in class in college. Another good place was college campus coffee shop.
    I would simply follow my routine. Not necessarily planning to talk to girls.
    Bars reallly sucked for me. Was not interested in beer talk. But I am married now.
    At the end of the day, the best trick is to find your way to get invited to the right social event. For me, that just required luck. But it is where I met my wife. 24 years ago.

    1. part of the problem is a lot of bars are mostly restaurants with bars or your in a nightclub. Its a tough environment.The easiest places without a doubt -are with live bands and a dance floor . chatting up a gal for an hour or too early is tough to do.. the best you can do is get a number and move along.. I wouldnt spend a minute max. …. I am older but if I was a kid; I would sleep from 8-1 and go out at 2 am. Gals when horny can be picked up in about 5 Minutes at that time. Hey, another party at my place. …The fastest I ever saw was 1 minute. Hey, your cute- lets get out here. I had a lot of closes over the years like that. Its just hoodrat sex anyway.

        1. lol. I am 49 but I understand….You waste a lot of time trying to get the deal done when you had zero chance. You have to know why it doesn’t work and that way your not hard on yourself. From a female perspective– she has to have a complete “experience” before she will leave a location unless your 4-5 levels above her…..so 11 pm is not gonna happen for you as a man. At my age its a different setup.. I have to hit happy hours because no one is out my age at 1 am- typically. so its- 1 quick drink – get a number…. times change.

  15. Hypergamy.
    It’s probably a lot more brutal in LA than NYC. “Higher level bankers” are often older Jewish men, aspie PHDs, Indians, Orientals, not exactly studs on the dating scene. I can beat out a banker in NYC for a girl if I have much better looks and higher overall swagger.
    By the way, every other kid out of college in the city starts up at one of these banks. Few make it to big time money.
    Los Angeles is more competitive than NYC because it has A-listers and B-listers taking a big share, plus every no namer out there who has Marlon Brando facial aesthetics or a voice like Frank Sinatra. It’s populated by the famous, wanna-be famous, handsome, creative types. A 9-5er is in a lower caste over there.
    In NYC, if you’re fit, have a place in a decent location, and some level of game, you can get some level of sexual interaction. There’s a lot more anonymity in NYC. There are pro ballplayers and millionaires in every city, but actors and musicians have higher SMV.

    1. “Higher level bankers” are often older Jewish men, aspie PHDs, Indians, Orientals, not exactly studs on the dating scene.”
      Not even close. Have you been on a Wall St firm trading floor? Or a private client services department? What you will see are a slew of ex-athletes from Ivy League and other top tier colleges. Of course there are some Jews and a geeky PHD types, including a smattering of Asians and even a couple of Indians. But the heavy hitters are the ex jocks and frat boys from the elite schools. They are the ones with the connections and the “star power” to bring in the big bucks.

      1. “Private client services?” You mean sales, of retail accounts. Extremely difficult to make big money unless you know a lot of 8 and 9 figure families. If that is the case, they were ahead way before they got to dating in NYC
        Traders aren’t the dumbasses they used to be. They are highly technical and analytical, proficient in software and mathematics. There are a few Chads on the trading floor, but there are probably more Chads in software or law.
        There are a lot of “job title seekers” in NYC, women who went to the elite schools, know the great companies, grew up upper middle class, and ultimately want the same. But if you can produce cash in a more laid-back gig, it’s very possible in NYC. I pull in mid 100’s in my 20’s at a no-name, with a non technical degree, and I can probably do $3-400k in a few years at another spot. It wasn’t always like this. I’ve actually pulled more women while unemployed than while working because I had time to invest in gaming them and improving myself. That money increase, from 0, to 40k year, to where I’m at now didn’t help that much to help me pull more, but investing into my overall status, looks, and game did.
        Anyone that says “the bankers” have all the money is fooling themselves. There are plenty of small business owners, tech guys, doctors, lawyers, non-finance corporate guys, accountants, the list goes on, that make millions. If a girl doesn’t recognize that, she’s a fool.
        I think tech is a bigger panty wetter than finance. You have plenty of people working for JP Morgan handling dipshit 6 figure accounts or back office. If you’re at Google or Dropbox, you’re guaranteed to be in six figures.

        1. “more Chads in software…”
          yep – I’m one of them – retired.
          I knew so many wall st guys from the Ivy League Schools…many blew up making 5 million++.
          But, I knew women that made much more…
          I reckon today is more serious with the quants and analytics. Ivy league guys for the relationships…
          But, interesting no one speaks about the women…Plenty making as much or more than men on Wall st.
          Do you see them in play?

        2. I don’t work in finance, but I know plenty about it. Not a ton of women in the high risk departments (sales, trading) but any neurotic overachiever from an Ivy can land an entry level slave position.
          If you’re retired, then you’re perception of wall street is one from a different era. Since Dodd-Frank, Gen Y hasn’t been making the millions to the extent of previous generations. Plus, it is so much more competitive with academic degrees and advanced certifications. I’ve met millionaire traders/stockbrokers from the 80’s with no degree and millions in the banks. Stockbrokers have pretty much been eliminated thru online brokerages and ETFs, and traders are now quants with software knowledge.

        3. “I think tech is a bigger panty wetter than finance.”
          Really???
          I have been in tech for the Wall St. firms for almost 30 years, independent consultant for the last 20, and I have NEVER seen it as such. And I’m not just referring to myself, but for the other guys as well. The traders and salesmen are the prize. The only thing being a IT consultant has gotten me is the ability to afford high end escorts. But sought after by the hot girls??? Never. Not for me and
          not for any of the guys I have worked with. And it is almost all guys, at least 90%. The only females are homely Indians and Asians. White females are almost non-existent in IT, and the ones who are there are homely as well. Plenty of hot, young trading and sales assistants on the floor, but they don’t give us tech peons the time of day.
          BTW, I never said the jocks & frat boys were “dumbasses”. Just because they played sports doesn’t mean they are stupid.
          A Yale or Princeton football player still has to be real smart to graduate. And yes, many of them are serious math guys as well, with degrees in engineering, phsyics, etc..

        4. Of course tech at a Wall St firm is going to be second tier to the guys who actually make the money at the Wall Street firm.
          Who do you think is king at Google? The tech guys, or the financial analysts?
          Tech is the new Wall Street.

        5. If that is true, then I wish someone would have told me!!!
          Are you saying I could be getting young, tight, 20 somethings for free instead of paying for them???

        6. You shouldn’t be relying on your job to get pussy, period.
          But if you do, and you work at a top level finance firm, even if you’re in IT or back office, just lie and say that you’re a VP of trading.

  16. “Just be yourself guys!! And love will come to you.”
    Hot chicks love to give this advise as it works for them…since they have the looks and the other 2 basics dont apply to them: game and assets.

  17. “Men aren’t happy in the dating scene because of the attitude women have towards it. Wallowing in mediocrity seems like a far easier option. Even if you “make it” to the top, it’s still endless games and energy being expanded on women who aren’t worth it.”
    Fuckin true

  18. “If you’re a man and you’re a broke slob, you’re not getting an even
    decent-looking girl. You’re pretty much left with the scrap heaps,
    because all women are gunning for the top.”
    Solution – don’t be a BROKE slob. Make more money and bang hot escorts and/or sugar babies. Beats the hell out of the “scrap heap”…
    Oh, and try not the be ANY kind of slob. Even the money hungry escorts and SBs will react positively if you keep yourself in decent shape. It provides a much needed “ego booster”.

  19. I had high hopes for this article, but I was left quite disappointed. This was terribly written – nothing but fluff. Not once did you mention any related to logistics, cost of living, urban social life, or even personal accounts beyond your own. You can do much better than this.

  20. I was actually just talking about this topic to a college friend of mine who lives in a rural area, got married at 26, and just had his first kid at 30 with a cool wife. He’s wondering why I’m still single and haven’t found “the one” yet. You’d think living in such a huge city as NYC I’d have an easier time finding someone I’m compatible with, but as time goes on dating gets harder and harder.
    I recently took a year off dating just to clear my mind and work on myself. I worked on building confidence, I made some strides in my career, and I’m amping up my exercise from 3 days a week to 6-7 to get in better shape. So when I started easing back into dating I thought I’d be set…..Nope, the same issues keep popping up.
    I place a lot of the blame squarely on the smartphone, which is giving everyone more and more options. Pre-smartphone I was able to get dates in NYC on dating sites with some pretty attractive girls when I had absolutely no game. 7 years later, I’m on Tinder and in 18 months I’ve gotten 3 dates with girls who are way below what I’ve pulled meeting girls in person. Dating apps and social media being available in your pocket is artificially inflating girls’ self-worth to extreme amounts.
    Options also means you have less chances to fuck up. In college I had no game whatsoever, but I was able to date girls I considered out of my league even though I would be in constant contact with them almost 24/7 and not being aloof at all, as well as pulling a lot of beta neediness moves. Hell, a lot of the time girls went out of their way to contact me – I can’t remember the last time a girl initiated contact with me. I was also able to have girls come back to me after they called things off, something I haven’t been able to do since. But now in NYC it’s like you have one strike and it’s over. Make one small misstep and suddenly you’re being shit tested to extents I had never encountered before. Hell, I’ve had dates that went perfectly well with girls who appeared to be into me who just ghosted on me after the first date.
    I’ve since accepted that if I want to settle down I’ll either have to move out of the city, or date a girl from the suburbs and we can travel to each other. I’ve been living in NYC for years now, but I realized I’ve never actually dated a girl long-term who lived in the city.

        1. Let those same guys move to a 3rd world country like Ukraine or Thaliand and watch them turn into sex Gods. They only reason they struggle is because they are in an environment where there are many alpha males like athletes, celebrities etc…

        2. Move those same guys to a 3rd world country like Ukraine or Thailand and they’ll become sex Gods. Only reason they struggle is because of their current environment. It’s hard for the IT guys to compete with alpha males like athletes, celebrities etc….

        3. They’ll still be ignorant nerds and still make stupid mistakes without game regardless of where they are. You can take the nerd out of the country but you can’t take the nerd out of the nerd without putting in the work.

        4. Whether they make stupid mistakes or not is irrelevant. THEY WILL GET LAID. Local women will offer their pussies in the hope that they can get them into relationships and hopefully move to the west. Believe me, I’ve seen it with my own eyes. Happy New Year by the way

        5. Whether they make stupid mistakes or not is irrelevant. THEY WILL STILL GET LAID. Local women in those poorer countries will still offer their pussies and try to get them into relationships with the hope that they can move to the west. Happy New Year

        1. I’ve met Clint at a meetup, but I gotta get more posts going on RVF. I’m at 1200+ here over four years, and I pretty much just started at RVF, so I feel a little left out.
          Plus, when I check the Poznan site, there is no official meetup.

    1. One of the things I’ve noticed since I transitioned from a small community college to a campus of nearly 30,000 students is that girls are afraid of guys approaching them. I had zero issue approaching girls at the community college out in the suburbs and had 4-5 girls interested in dating me there (full disclosure: I was in a relationship then) but now that im single and on a campus that is infected with 3rd wave feminism, you’d think im Frankenstein when I approach the girls on the campus.
      The cellphone makes it super easy for them to bury their face in the screen and not have to face the reality of potentially talking to strangers or guys who might want to get to know them. They just aren’t receptive to getting to know outsiders as women once were. Most of it has to do with the campuses pushing the false narrative of rape culture and then white men are aggressive creeps looking to take advantage of you. I cant tell you how many cucked out guys I see hanging around with attractive women just to fill their attention tank up to the top and get nothing in return.

      1. ah ! those times when we used to wolf whistle chicks on the campus, they actually liked it, they knew it was for fun. Fast forward 20 years later and crazy SJWs would get you arrested for that.

  21. Apparently the online dating profile tagline of “If you protested Trump, it probably won’t work” doesn’t attract loads of women…………

  22. After living in San Francisco for two years I couldn’t agree more. I have never ever had one single date from any dating app in this city. And I am a decent looking guy with good degrees, honest, sensitive, caring with great sense of humor etc. etc. (don’t miss the sarcasm!)..These all proved to be absolutely useless in actual dating market!
    I have a co-worker who is White, 6’2″, good looking guy — he usually have 3-5 dates per week and gets his dick sucked at the bar/club toilet every weekend on fairly regular basis. He does not know anything about game, neither does he care!
    All I can say- dating apps making these girls in big cities absolutely intolerable cunts. With all the power of swiping right and choosing any dick they want– they are going after only 10% of the guys– and these guys with their mere existence enjoying harem of girls! (good for them).
    Now a days, when a girl around 25+ shows any sign of interest on me, I just look at her and think how many dicks she has sucked in her life!
    Be careful guys– Any single women who lived in a big city over age 25 is nothing but bunch of drama, tons of baggage and full of cums from other guys!

    1. Instead of relying on Online dating why don’t you actually leave your home and approach women outside? What are you scared of??

        1. Tinder and dating apps are a war crime in the war of the sexes. In real life, a woman can only fuck off those guys who approach them, but on Tinder they can fuck off every guy, as if every guy approached them, like they were sexy supermodels everybody is thirsting after. This is simple ego-inflating device for women, making more of a cunt of average girls. The software developers of Tinder deserve to be shot.

        2. It’s true the dating apps have changed the dynamic of dating thus making undesirable women feel validated on a daily basis. I’m currently on a hiatus of online dating, quite frankly most women hate online dating too. They describe it as being full of creeps and losers. So why bother both sides hate it. I can’t believe people marry after meeting online. Maybe these are matches made in hell.

        3. Man you must be old. Its not just dating apps. If tinder disappeared tomorrow it wouldn’t change anything. Its instagram / facebook / snapchat and other social media apps that dominate the net now. Women have figured out they can online shop for alpha cock, while avoiding the betas. And the objective isn’t marriage. Its hypergamy.

        4. Snapchat is the absolute worst. Some of my friends have it and I shame them for it all the time. I will never understand the point of taking the same stupid ass picture and sending it to someone. I made the mistake of lusting after this hottie I met at a baseball game a few years back and getting a snapchat just for the purpose of snapping back and forth with her. Got some nice pics out of it, but imagine the validation she got from me and countless of other guys who fall into that trap. I’ll never do it again.
          I have never taken online dating seriously. Here in Wisco, I got one date with an above average girl in the looks department. It went nowhere and part of the reason it didnt go anywhere is because I failed her shit tests. That was before I discovered this site. Now it seems like I get one or two views on my profile a month and 90% of the women on those apps are absolute trash. I’d rather face outright rejection out in public than waste time on dating apps.

        5. As a matter of fact, I do not date online, at all.
          I concentrate only on those females with whom I cross paths in real life.
          It appears to me that online dating is creating an artificial abundance – another change in the real dynamics of dating.
          Or maybe I am just too old for that shit 🙂

      1. That misses the point. That won’t change the dynamic. You can quit social media apps. But you have zero control over how a woman uses her smartphone. She can post a few cleavage pics on social media and have 100 new males the next morning to think about. Its hypergamy on a level not seen by previous generations.

  23. Been in LA for 20 years, 49 but look 35, own a fully remodeled 3 bedroom 2 bath house 30 min from Hollywood, self employed, 2 cars, zero debt. In the business I’m in, there are a lot of attractive women I interact with, hear their conversations, and everything said here is 100% correct. I can’t complain about getting the occasional bang from a girl 20 years younger, fortunate in that regard, but because of the business I’m in they are accessible. Had I not been in the spa business, no way I would be interacting with so many attractive women constantly. They are all looking for the bigger & better deal. I’m not driving a Mercedes nor have a 5000 sq ft home in the Hollywood Hills, a pro athlete, A list actor, or rock star, so 7s & above are out of my reach as far as dating pool. I repair all the equipment, so a lot of them look at me like I’m a fuckin dishwasher. They have no idea my rates are $150/hr & all income is filtered through my S Corp, but still, none of that matters. Driving a BMW 7 Series with cool $300 sunglasses, a million dollar house (and 2 million in debt), attracts them.
    Also, as mentioned here before, a lot of the women between 30-40 are on Tinder & Bumble. They go on dates with ‘regular’ guys in their 40s & 50s indicating they want something ‘serious’, expect to be treated like a princess, but at the same time, they are riding the cocks of the 22-25 year old guys not expecting anything. So for the younger guys out there, try & swipe 100 a day for the best return. These women are all attractive but no way are they to be taken seriously, & forget relationship material. The farther past 30 they get, the more fucked in the head they are. They create phony Facebook/Instagram profiles & stalk ex’s, their ex’s new girlfriends, etc, they are crazy.
    The bar scene here is the absolute worst. I’m not talking about the club scene where girls get in for free, drink for free ($20 a drink or thousands for a table/bottle service for guys) & single guys kept out to even the ratio. The regular bars here are sausage fests, 70% guys and out of the 30% girls only 2% are even bangable. Most are preoccupied on their cell phones, taking selfies, group photos, checking their likes on Instagram, their ex’s Instagram, so they are not approachable.
    So young men here with a regular job, roommates, driving a 1 year old Toyota, student loans, have minimal options. Although the guys that I know who are 6 feet tall, covered in tattoos, do very well here, regardless of their age or income.
    LA is full of beautiful women of all ages from all over the world, but they are the most screwed up mentally, the most attention starved, For the average guy (who in LA is struggling to make ends meet) to nail one of them it requires resources (time, effort, money) in moat cases not worth the 10 seconds of pleasure it would return.

    1. Couldn’t agree more. However, I think average beauty in LA is much higher than any other city. What I meant is on LA scale if a girl is 6, in San Francisco that girl would be a 9 or 10. Even an ugly girl in SF think herself as Victoria’s Secret model!
      Because of these right swipe dating apps, even an average girl is getting service by 2-3 hot guys a week and also countless ego validating comments in their Instagram profile making them intolerable cunts.

  24. I work in software so I could easily get myself a place in the country side and live from there. One of the main reason I don’t do it, is that I’m afraid it will lower my chances to find the future mother of my children.
    It actually pisses me off that I think that way, because it’s the case. Has anyone moved to the countryside as a single man and still had some luck in the “dating game” (whatever that means now)?

    1. Change your thinking man!! I live 20 minutes from a city of 200k, wood heat, garden, guns, pets, and space to hunt and fish… having a sauna pulls them in nice. Admittedly its harder to manage a household while trying to pull girls in town, refrain from drinking to much on nights out if I’m going home, and trying to find a girl who’s laid back enough to want to be in the country in the first place.
      Regardless moving to the bush got my life back to a happy place… no noise, no mortgage debt, no neighbours (minus all the animals I so enjoy to see everyday, or eat)… if a girl don’t want that then fuck em… trip to a recommended ROK destination on all the money I saved.

  25. No matter what, women never learn anything. They ride the cock carousel on the hunt for a better deal until they reach the wall and realize it’s too late to have a baby and that they’ll end up with cats for the rest of their miserable life. How fucking pathetic is this ?

    1. Very pathetic. However It is what they righteously deserve.
      Women should take note.
      Isaiah 4:1

    2. They can usually brow beat a beta into giving them a child immediately!!! Usually during the honeymoon phase, now I can never be in a honeymoon phase with a 30+ year old woman but there are tons of men that can and will. I personally notice that women 30 or above getting in a relationship will get married or pregnant much faster than any couple in their 20s.

  26. Dating? More like trying to add to your “fuck buddy” list… dating? forget that. All I want is to fuck her and then leave after that. They are only notch above and below prostitutes. No wait, they are prostitutes.

  27. Move to a smaller town or hire a pro. Or both. The end really tied it together. Women simply aren’t worth it.

  28. In most ( 50% +)of the world, a girl who is not a virgin will not be able to get married. In the West ( US in particular), she will find the best man even if she has had sex with hundreds of men, and has kids. This is how desperate the Western men are.

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