Do Not Buy Her Dinner

This past Friday, I realized how far I’ve come in understanding women.

Two years ago I remember taking this very pretty girl out on a date.  Let’s call her Ashley.  I had just broken up with my old girlfriend and was setup on a blind date.  Per persuasion from my mother and sister (and I not being strong enough to listen to my own beliefs), I picked Ashley up and took her to a nice wine bar and restaurant.  We had dinner, a glass of wine, and towards the end she mentioned how tired she was and that she’d like to go home, but that “we should definitely hang out again.”  So like a nice gentlemen I obliged and took Ashley home.  And I never heard from her again.

Fast forward to the present.  One of the girls I’m fucking seeing, told me she had plans for dinner with a friend on Friday night, but she’d like to “hook up” later if I was around.  I told her that can be arranged.  I had gone out every night last week, so when Friday came around I was sitting at home watching the NBA playoffs and just relaxing.  She texted me around 9:45 p.m. that she was just finishing up dinner and that she’d be home soon.  I told her I’d meet her there.

I put on my stained DARE shirt over a decade old, some loose jeans and sandals and headed over.  We immediately had sex and while we were laying around after, I thought I’d verify what I was presuming:

Me: Who’d you go to dinner with?

Her: My friend Peter.

Me: Ah, so you had a date?

Her: No it was not a date! We are just friends.

Me: Really.  Let me ask you something…did he pay for dinner?

Her: Well..yes.  But he knows we are just friends.

Me: He wants to sleep with you.

Her: He knows that’s not going to happen.

Me: Has he tried to kiss you ever?

Her: No.  Well, sort of.  He tried a pre-kiss.

Me: What the hell is a pre-kiss?

Her: He tried to hint at kissing me by kind of moving around weirdly near my face.  I don’t know how to explain it, but I could tell he was thinking of kissing me.

Me: Didn’t he wonder why you were leaving so early on a Friday night?

Her: Yeah he wanted to go get drinks after, but I told him I had to get up early to go hiking with a friend so I couldn’t… (guilty smile)

Of course going hiking with a friend was actually coming back to have sex with me, after Peter had taken her out for dinner already.  Which brings me to the main point for today:

Never Buy Dinner Prior To Banging

If you have been a student of the game by now you know this tenet very well as it’s almost common knowledge (e.g. see #13 here).  But since the above just happened to me, I thought I’d point it out in case any beginners or doubters still think otherwise.  Initially, aside from the potential of being a chump who she uses for free food, dinner dates are counterproductive to the end goal of sex.  The large meals soak up any alcohol you may have given her, sobering her up and increasing her inhibitions.  It can be awkwardly long.  You may have to sit across from each other at a table.  She may perceive you as trying to buy her affection (spoiler – you are).  It’s expensive.  And sadly in America, asking a girl to dinner = being a creeper.

Then there is the situation demonstrated by the anecdote above.  Buying her dinner will not make her want to have sex with you.  She’s already decided that way beforehand.  It’s better to be the one that fucks her after than to entertain her prior.  If she demands dinner, she was just using you anyway so move on.

The Two Exceptions

There are however two situations where purchasing a meal and/or having dinner can actually increase your chance of coitus:

1. The Home Dinner Date.

Roosh does a great explanation here, so I won’t repeat it but rather only append to it.  It’s a great screener to see if she’s interested in sex, because if you tell her you are going to cook, and she agrees to come over, she knows that you will be trying for sex.  As a bonus here is one of my secrets: the first thing you should have her do is chop an onion.  It will make her tear, potentially smear her makeup and you can poke fun at her and it immediately cuts all the awkwardness to the extent there was any to begin with.  When cooking move her around by the waist a lot, touch her hand/arm to show her how to do things, and so on.  You can physically escalate a lot.  I’ve had great success doing the home dinner date.

2. The Weekend Brunch Date.

Yes you read that right.  Brunch.  Some view it as gay, some view it as girly, but guess what?  Shit works.  Next to my previous apartment there was a bar that offered brunch with bottomless mimosas.  So I tried a date there.  Since it’s a bottomless drink and they refill mimosas every time they walk by, you don’t really know how many you have had.  And you don’t have to affirmatively request another one, they just fill it up.  So you eat, drink many mimosas and it’s only 3pm.  She should have nowhere else to go.  It’s too early for her weekend night plans.  Offer any reason to go back to your place, maybe a glass of water to “sober up” or smoke a cigarette on your patio and run standard escalation and you will have a good chance at a bang.  I’ve also had a lot of success implementing this date.

After The Bang

I actually like to treat a girl to a drink or nice meal.  It coincides with my natural desire to provide and fosters the evolutionary roles of men and women in how the man provides and the woman is provided for.  The problem is in Western culture if you provide before you penetrate, you’re a pussy.  So you have to tweak the process.  If you’ve now had sex with her, and you liked the sex or you like hanging out with her, I see no reason to not take her to a casual dinner or whatever else is within your means.  In the end, however, it’s in your best interests to adopt a Pavlovian approach to women where you reward good behavior (sex) with treats (dinner,dates, and time).

Read Next: Why Money Can No Longer Save The Beta Male

103 thoughts on “Do Not Buy Her Dinner”

  1. It’s a fairly simple formula.
    Alphas: push for sex, then may or may not commit
    Betas: push for commitment, then may or may not get sex

    1. yeah but there’s nothing like feeding her up on quality sushi to increase her libido before you get started…..

      1. I respectfully disagree my fellow player. Quality sushi out on the town is still an expensive dinner and will have the same results as any other dinner out.
        Take it from a dumb A$$ who just made that mistake last week because I though she was different.
        Always learning

  2. “I actually like to treat a girl to a drink or nice meal.”
    Same here. It’s in our nature as well raised men to want to be providers. It is just unfortunate that our present culture demands we reject this if we want to be successful.

  3. How about taking her to the most expensive restaurant and then when the bill comes act aloof and slow, like expecting she is gonna take care of it… And if not, only pay for your shit. Has anybody tried that?

        1. actually i’ve made girls pick up tabs in expensive restaurants…. “lost my wallet… sorry….”
          they do pay…. but in the first few cases, i had actually had lost my wallet…. so if you want to use this reason, you better make the acting good… or just leave all your cash at home…. be prepared to wash dishes or spend the night in jail if it fails….

        2. also “going dutch” where you split the bill is a fair way to do it and no one can baulk at that… it also creates respect…. although reduces the chance of a repeat date and moves you closer to the friend zone, but i have also done that.. and it does work fine…… you want women’s rights…. you got’em…

        3. Not exactly a virgin. I banged some chicks, including a former playmate if you ask me

  4. Discussion like this makes me wish I were a field sociologist rather than a physicist/engineer. I would enjoy writing up a proposal to get funding to set up a way to determine how common it is for women to behave this way.

    1. one girl told me she prefers to sleep with the guys she doesn’t like…. so she can get down and dirty without consequences…. but then she dates the guys she likes so she can get to know them and see if they are into commitment….. i think this would be classified as out gaming the alpha players, using them to get her rocks off… while searching for a beta to milk long term…..

      1. How are the alphas getting out gamed when the alphas are getting the sex from the girls? These girls think they are out playing the alphas but in actuality, they are giving what the alpha wants: the poosey. The one being played is the beta provider douche…

        1. Correction: It’s what they both want. Girls want sex just as much as guys do. Both the girl and the alpha guy win. You’re right that the only loser is the beta.

        2. Losers are the people who only care about sex.
          There’s so much more beautiful things in life than sex with a stupid slut.

  5. I am a big fan of the home-cooked dinner move, at my place. Has never failed me. Should only be used after the initial meeting for drinks somewhere. A good tip when running this move is make her bring something: dessert, alcohol, whatever. It increases her investment in the process….

    1. –A good tip when running this move is make her bring something: dessert,
      alcohol, whatever. It increases her investment in the process….–
      All about this. To take it one further, give her a fairly specific request to track down that is imporant to the meal. A specific Red that pairs with the protein you’re making, a dessert from that one place, this veggie for this reason, not that one.
      It doesn’t need to be made into a scavenger hunt. Just saying, don’t be afraid to get a little specific in regards to your request. She’ll enjoy having a little mini-puzzle to solve, as well as feeling like she’s a key piece to a bigger puzzle.
      Something I’ve been saying for years: Women love Tetris
      Or, to update to 2013…Candy Crush Saga

    2. Agreed. Also, along with the drinks move, you could do something else like have a mini-picnic if it’s during the day at a park or someplace out in the open in the fresh air. First, it’s free to go to the park. Second, no noise or annoying patrons as you’d find in a bar. Third, if she brings her own drink, then that saves you money in buying the drinks.

  6. hmm. then i must assume the cupcakes that the handsome guy from OPS brings to my desk are the ‘cupcakes of flirtation’.

  7. You are so right – I learned long ago that women aren’t “involved” until you’ve f**ked them. That’s why I never buy them anything until after the deal is done, then it’ll be something that I want – a play or some such. It’s only after I’ve found out that she’s interested (by having sex with her), and that we are sexually compatible that I might want to get to know her.
    Of course, I learned the hard way – I think the last time I bought dinner for a women before I had sex with her was more than 30 years ago when I was in college. Over the years, I’ve basically modified that to, I don’t really think of a woman as dating material until I’ve had sex with her. It’s gotten so that if you aren’t having sex with her, she doesn’t have any emotional buy-in. So until you’ve sealed the deal – you have to put zero effort in, otherwise it’ll be a blackhole – and not a good one…. 🙂

    1. “So until you’ve sealed the deal – you have to put zero effort in, otherwise it’ll be a blackhole – and not a good one….”
      That is the fucking truth too!!

  8. i agree with the dinner thing….but it can give you something to do and create conversation…… i tried a first dinner date blind.. friend of a friend… it was kinda hard work….we cut it short…. i had nothing to lose, so i went straight for the kiss outside the restaurant….she was electrified….. second date was in my apartment (i wasn’t aggressive enough but also wanted to show her what a gentleman i was so she’d have to invite me to her place…) third, was at her place two days later….i stayed all night (we didn’t sleep much) poor thing had to work in the morning….. but she was texting the same afternoon, so i guess she enjoyed herself….

  9. Reading this blog is like getting kicked HARD in the nutz by reality every time, but its good medicine and needs to be done. Yes, I have been Mr. Peter P. Pumpkineater on many occasions in the past. No more.

    1. Everyone has man. But remember, true Alpha comes from within. Keep reading this stuff, and you will be a man.

  10. Tom Leykis talked about this all the time. While poindexter is taking her out to the fancy dinner. She’s texting away to the guy that’s going to bang her after he drops her off. Seriously, he might as well drop her off right in front the dude’s doorstep and slip a condom into her pocket.
    One of Tom’s rules:
    If you’re on a dinner/lunch date with a girl and she can’t put down her phone, excuse yourself to the bathroom, and then proceed to walk out the door and leave.

    1. Fuck yes. I’ve had this happen once and once only, unfortunately the circumstances of the dinner didn’t allow me to make an exit.

  11. It’s ridiculous; I enjoy being a nice guy, so I make sure to fuck them hard enough that I can get away with being a nice guy for a few weeks, before the inevitable break-up.

    1. it’s awful, trying to overcome my desire to relax, let her know i like her, and just quit playing at being an ass. then occasionally i give in, and quickly re-re-relearn the lesson.

      1. what’s the lesson with this chick? you tell her you like her and she starts walking all over you again or treating you shitty? why not get another girl?

        1. sorry yeah, it’s girls in the broad sense, not one in particular. in general, when i tend toward being myself and relaxing, it doesn’t turn out well and i have to go back to an act. and i don’t care for it is all. there are plenty of them out there, just not a lot of great ones.

        2. yeah i hear ya man. and even though we all talk big about just wanting to get laid, at the end of the day, i’m still hoping i’ll find one of the great ones that wants to stick around even when i’m my crazy ass self.

        3. I agree with you and justajon1. I think most of us want someone we can stop playing “the game” with. I like taking care of a woman and treating her to all the best things in life and when I care about someone I don’t want to pretend I don’t. The trick is finding one who isn’t an angry feminist slut who’ll break your heart and take you for everything you’ve got as soon as you let your guard down. Slim pickings here in the US. All I have to say is, when you find one of those old fashioned pretty little nice girls, you better snap her up before someone else does and you better treat her right. Because if you don’t and she’s got half a brain and isn’t too bad to look at, she’ll have at least half a dozen men waiting in line to take your place. Eventually she’ll figure out she can do better than you. I found one like that. The one that got away, ya know. I was still burned from the last bitch and treated her like shit. Lesson learned I guess. Now, if someone could tell me how to spot a nice girl out of a room full of bitches, that would be something.

  12. It’s a sad sad world we live in now. Western women are now only good for fucking.

  13. I went on a date recently where I passed a steakhouse and I was hungry. I paid for dinner for us both and I didn’t feel that it hurt my chances in any way. Besides, am I supposed to eat whilst she stares at my plate ’cause this girl actually couldn’t afford it? Or avoid eating altogether ’cause I’m hungry? I did get some action that night but I didn’t have any expectation of it just because I bought her dinner.
    I do admit that buying dinners is in general, though, a bad idea. Most women then will mentally slot you in the provider category and make you wait when they’ll bang some other guy. Truly awful. Westernised women (this includes non-white women too) have killed off the provider. They’ve become sluts of the highest order who when society crashes will blame it on working men, saying that we should’ve been harder on them, whilst at the moment they’re trying to live it up at our expense. There actually is no way to fix this short of an economic-societal collapse. Don’t worry, its happening in slow motion as we speak. So the question is how quickly will women cotton on that they have to have our backs. And will enough real productive men want these women when other shores offer more riches and better women?

  14. I don’t even consider myself that much of a player, but I have never bought a woman dinner before sex. I tell this to blue-pill guy friends and they react as if I’ve just grown wings. I tell them “You have no reason to pay her for the privilege of her company. Your company is her payment.”

  15. I live in a small town, where bitches are very spoiled and entitled. It’s big enough to see people over and over, but not so small that people will know each other. To see and to be seen plays a big role here.
    I am thinking about going to the most high maintenance expensive bitches, hb9, game them and then close with a “would you like to have diner someday at Le Chateau de la Chançon?” and put a silly excuse such as “let’s celebrate spring in style!”. She most probably would say yes. After all its le Chateau de la Chançon guys! Her pants will be wet!
    So you meet the hb9 one hour before. Tell her to dress damn sexy. Parade around the town with her for a while and then take her to the restaurant. Eat, drink, have fun and when the check comes you softly say “shall we split the bill?”.
    Things are not like 50 years ago, men and women are the same now, so I am sure she will understand. And if not, well too bad.
    The bitch may be pissed (or not, maybe u turned her on if u do it right). At any case she didnt take advantage of you, and you managed well a situation, enjoyed a good diner and got some social proof in the process.
    Try it at home and repeat the operation with other chicks to perfect the technique. Let the other people in town wonder who is this sleazy guy who dates 8s and 9s

  16. I realize I may be breaking one of the cardinal rules of the modern manosphere by saying this, but I actually enjoy buying dinner for women. I understand and agree with much of what Mr. Dogger is saying, but I would follow with this addendum: delivery is everything. There’s nothing inherently “alpha” or “beta” about the act of buying dinner (or much else) in itself, but where the “alphaness” or “betaness” inheres in how one goes about it. On the one hand, you can act like Peter Pumpkineater and use it as a bartering tool to get yourself out of the friendzone (which he already appears to be in from the start). As Mr. Dogger established, this is a fool’s errand, and you’ll end up a doormat. On the other hand however, if done properly, picking up the check can act to accentuate “alpha” characteristics that you’ve put in place. Cheesy as it sounds, flashing the cash or plastic when the bill arrives with an appropriate air of “I got this, baby” can communicate a level of confidence, wealth, power, or what have you. Women like being taken care of, and they like a guy who can take care of them, but doing so is no substitute for a lack of dominant characteristics that need to be established from the beginning.

    1. Just the way you speak is hot. Can I just add, also don’t pay by Card, use Cash it just looks so I’m in-charge and sexy. YUM!!!
      Reading this blog makes me realise you guys are as baffled about all this dating as us but theres no need to get all Caveman on us. I would never bang any guy just for food and I certainly wouldn’t bang some guy without him investing at least a great deal of time on/with me.
      I understand there are some horrible girls out there who use Beta’s and screw Alphas but that’s like me punishing lovely men because one guy used me. No I’d just be careful that’s all.

  17. Dinner quite frankly is boring. You just sit there and spend so much time saying things that might eventually screw you over.
    If you do anything with a chick make sure it’s an activity. You are moving…it gives you plenty of opportunity for touching and the chances of her getting bored lessen.
    My go to activities at first are bowling, pool, or mini golf…even if the chick is as dull as a log, I’m still having fun.

    1. Yes, yes, yes, a THOUSAND times yes! Not only are you having fun; these activities are a lot cheaper than a dinner.
      Better yet, pick an activity you’re GOOD at. That’ll make you look alpha, because you’re having fun doing something that you’re good at; it’ll showcase your confidence, big time.
      In my case, I’m good at skating; I can skate better than most people walk. I was skating at the local rink this weekend when I struck up a conversation with a cute brunette. She asked how I got so good; I told her I’d been doing it for many years. When she was out on the floor, I did a couple of cool moves to show off my skills.
      Anyway, later I saw her taking off her skates. I asked her if she was calling it a night. I sat down on the bench. She turned towards me, leaned in a bit, and licked her lips-yes! I told her to give me her number, which she did. Tomorrow, I’m going to call her, and make plans for one of the aforementioned activities… 🙂

    2. Eh, not so sure about that. If the chick you’re with is flighty and always has to have an adrenaline rush, that’s a problem. She’s gone the instant things get stale. If the chick is dull, I picked wrong and got confuzzled for some reason. If she’s Miss Right, she’s got the rest of our lives to go on exciting dates. If you have things in your closet, well, it’s probably not meant to be, anyway.

  18. Smashing!! I dig bringing a broad out for a snack and a drink too, but you’re spot on; broads will assume (as always) that every decision youre making revolves around them and try to jam you up.

    1. Ha! Well for your guys’ info….girls know your games and perhaps that is why we play how we play. Do you think for one second that your one-eyed monster is some kind of reward?? So you expect us girls to fuck you THEN you will pick up the tab?? I can guarantee you that if she did end up falling for fucking you, she will probably be the same type to meet up with another guy within a night or so and screw him too. She will just keep going down the line until she finds someone that can actually make her orgasm (we mostly fake it) then waiting for the tab might be an even compensation. Guys are just as much whores as the girls….NO EXCUSES!

  19. If you do go out to dinner before you’ve consummated the relationship, persuade her to sit at the bar rather than at a table. That way, you can achieve almost the same amount of physical intimacy as you could if out for drinks. Otherwise, Law Dogger is correct that you should avoid dinner dates.

      1. Sit on the same side of the table “european-style” (or if it’s small/square, at right angles) and for people-watching. Talk about how sitting straight across makes the situation adversarial by putting a barrier between people. Works like a charm. Just avoid the places where you can’t do that. You did check out the venue ahead of time, right?


      1. Who said anything about buying her dinner? I said “going out to dinner”. Maybe you buy, maybe she pays her share. It depends on the vibe. Sometimes buying a woman dinner does work. You go with how it feels.

  20. I have no idea how I landed on this website, but I’m glad I did. This must be what men feel like when they read Cosmo. (Which, btw, should be a post on here. If your girl friend reads Cosmo, it is a red flag. Men aren’t hard to please. We don’t need “100 Ways to Give Him Pleasure with only the Items in your Glove Box!” Yeah, no, fuck that. If he isn’t horny, make him a sandwich. Problem solved.)
    Anyway, I can tell (most) of you gents right now why you aren’t getting laid. I can access the situation in .2 seconds. Let me try to phrase this as “logically” as possible, since your gender prides itself on your amazing use of logic. (Eye rolling needs an emoticon.)
    You know how you go on a date with a woman, and she’s automatically telling you her issues, her exes name, her cats name, her dream wedding, etc? And you think “this woman wants a relationship so bad, she doesn’t care with whom?”
    It’s desperation, and you can smell it. Right?
    We can smell it on you, too.
    I bought her dinner… I’m ENTITLED to sex.
    I’m buying her dinner, why isn’t she putting out already?
    I knew I should have texted Sara (Tara, Cara etc) instead.

    1. Far more women feel entitled to being courted then men feel entitled to sex.
      Far more women are of the opinion that the man not paying for dinner and simply paying for everything they do together at least 80% of the time is an outright DEALBREAKER!!
      Far more women then men overvalue their self worth in life, due in part from what I can tell is because of “empowerment” and rampant narcissism. Which is business corporate talk for building up and maintaining your own self esteem at the expense of everyone else.
      Along with smelling desperation we can also smell gold digging whores and liars.
      Personally, and this is anecdotal, the times I have bought dinner back in the day I have never expected sex. I’m still kind of wary about any woman who puts out right away. Because I question her mental state. What I do expect however, is some sort of effort to make an impression that is mutual because you know, women have to convince men to like them too.
      Holding old dating mores over men sets up the ground work for women to be pumped an dumped because If I do all the relationship heavy lifting, while you simply judge my worth, you are not ENTITLED to a faithful, loyal man.

    2. In other words, just as roissy says and we men already know:
      Men – be an asshole, and you will get laid.

  21. Dinner dates are a boring cliche. I prefer to do drinks at a bar or two close to my place. It’s cheaper, you don’t order much food this way so the girl usually comes on an empty stomach and the alcohol will get you both relaxed quickly. Some points:
    – It’s not inherently beta to pay IF you do it in the right (dominant) way
    – The more venues the better as it creates the feeling of intimacy between you. Plus, bar crawls are fun!
    – Start with the diva bar and save the best place till last. Places where you can sit beside each other are great for kino.
    – Have a set date plan to use for all first dates. Check out all the venues and prepare. Once you have a solid plan that brings you results, stick to it. don’t change the plan no matter how hot the girl is. A 9 gets EXACTLY the same date plan as a 6!
    – Keep your place well-stocked with alcohol and make a point of talking about what she likes to drink during the date. It’s then a natural continuation to “open that bottle of Bordeaux” at your apartment later.
    The above is solidly field-tested and works for me. I usually pay and have had more first date lays than I can remember.

  22. A great resource i can share is the guys who run it have a laugh and show how home dinner dates can work out quite well if they’re relatively light and you involve the girl as part of the process, play around with them too

  23. Every dude I’ve had dinner with just paid for his own dinner.
    Fuck women and fuck trying to appease them. If they get pissed you didn’t buy her dinner just ditch them and never look back.

  24. I live outside of the States in a place where most people take taxis rather than drive themselves. If a girl agrees to have dinner with me, and has at least one drink, she almost always agrees to go home with me, even on the first date (I got a girl with a curfew once or something once, though if I had picked a restaurant closer to my apt., I’m fairly sure that would have succeeded too–and disclaimer that this is all a few years ago before I got hitched and I didn’t actually go all the way with them once I got them in bed for religious reasons feel free to laugh but whatevs). The alcohol is really key… I prefer soju and sake (smooth, but not too hard on the feminine palate), though half a shared bottle of red wine plus a desert wine could do the trick. I know it’s harder in the States, but if you have a little cash to burn and you’ve confirmed the girl can drink a bit, I don’t see how this doesn’t work for you guys…

  25. I don’t enjoy cooking nor do I really know how to other than simple stuff like microwaving a TV dinner, making eggs and toast, or boiling a pot of spaghettie. So how to do the “Home Dinner Date”?

  26. Agreed. I have a rule of not spending any money on a girl unless she’s in a comitted relationship with me. There’s absolutely no reason for me to pay for her company, in fact she can take me to dinner for putting up with listening to the mundane stupidity that permeates out of 98.9% of girls nowadays unfortunately. Anytime a girl brings it up about me not taking them to dinner I say “Well sweetheart we have feminism now; we’re both completely equal across the board”. It’s classic.

  27. So brunch in america, means unlimited alcohol? Man my country sucks! Brunch here in the southern hemisphere is bacon and eggs with coffee

  28. Ehm just find a girl with traditional values and who appreciate your efforts. That means of course going to a different country. Why waste time on girls who’s rolemodel is Snooki ? just forget it, dont waste your time and life on them and stop trying to crack the code on how to get them. It’s like a wolf trying to crack the code on how to turn over the trashcan when there’s a rich forest 10 miles away.

  29. seriously, if anyone here has read any material by Roosh and still does stupid shit like buying dinner to a bitch he didn’t have sex with, he should hit himself on the head with a brick.

  30. Also, there is no such thing as alpha or beta. Men are not divided into such categories. In truth, most men have some alpha qualities and some beta qualities. Men do not fit into such cartoonish categories. You guys are delusional and have no real life experience.

  31. Also, there is no such thing as alpha or beta. Men are not divided into such categories. In truth, most men have some alpha qualities and some beta qualities. Men do not fit into such cartoonish categories. You guys are delusional and have no real life experience.

  32. Also, there is no such thing as alpha or beta. Men are not divided into such categories. In truth, most men have some alpha qualities and some beta qualities. Men do not fit into such cartoonish categories. You guys are delusional and have no real life experience.

  33. Man you guys have no experience with women. The above advice is meaningless. Buying a girl dinner doesn’t kill anything. That’s stupid. Either she is attracted to you and feels chemistry, or she doesn’t. If she does, you can do anything and you will get her. If she doesn’t, no PUA or game will help. All of this is fiction in your minds and on the internet. Men who have dates with women in real life don’t say this kind of stuff. Only losers with no experience with girls do. There is no such thing as “game” either. It’s all a fiction. A girl knows if she likes you or not. Buying dinner for her or not doesn’t change that. This advice is stupid and illogical.
    For some real truth, visit HappierAbroad dot com.

  34. Man you guys have no experience with women. The above advice is meaningless. Buying a girl dinner doesn’t kill anything. That’s stupid. Either she is attracted to you and feels chemistry, or she doesn’t. If she does, you can do anything and you will get her. If she doesn’t, no PUA or game will help. All of this is fiction in your minds and on the internet. Men who have dates with women in real life don’t say this kind of stuff. Only losers with no experience with girls do. There is no such thing as “game” either. It’s all a fiction. A girl knows if she likes you or not. Buying dinner for her or not doesn’t change that. This advice is stupid and illogical.
    For some real truth, visit HappierAbroad dot com.

  35. Man you guys have no experience with women. The above advice is meaningless. Buying a girl dinner doesn’t kill anything. That’s stupid. Either she is attracted to you and feels chemistry, or she doesn’t. If she does, you can do anything and you will get her. If she doesn’t, no PUA or game will help. All of this is fiction in your minds and on the internet. Men who have dates with women in real life don’t say this kind of stuff. Only losers with no experience with girls do. There is no such thing as “game” either. It’s all a fiction. A girl knows if she likes you or not. Buying dinner for her or not doesn’t change that. This advice is stupid and illogical.
    For some real truth, visit HappierAbroad dot com.

    1. If you buy a dog dinner it will like you. The above advice works excellently for dogs. Winston, you are the only man on this entire thread.

      1. OTOH, while I agree, a dog only “likes” you when you feed it because it has found its next meal without putting in effort to do so.
        E-statting PUA loser types don’t get this while they are rummaging through POFesque damaged goods while in the back of their mind wondering all the time “Where are all the good women at?”

  36. I would be worried by receiving anything from a guy who I don’t plan on any relationships with unless I can reciprocate with the helps too.
    On the other hand, I am also disgusted at the mindset of people attempting on minimizing their investment. It ruins all the feelings of love with people calculating attempting on outplaying each other only. There is a reason that nobody wants to be a sucker, so go for someone who won’t exploit on your kindness but with someone who knows how to love.
    On another note, I’m not from your guys culture, I’m still a virgin, and I probably would not give it in until after marriage. So you guys here may never have any chances with conservative women any way, due to the internal conflicts regarding how the games are played.

  37. Brilliant. This partly inspired a post I’m releasing later tonight.
    It also inspired further insight into why dinner dates are in 99% of cases the death knell of romantic attraction.
    Just one reason: It sets completely the wrong vibe, especially since you’ll be in a situation where she’s already been with hundreds of guys before and didn’t kiss. She was wined and dined all those times and didn’t kiss the guy, so she’ll automatically be extremely resistant to kissing you either.

    1. i kiss after ever first date, if i DON’T it’s because she’s hella not interested and i probably picked up on that during the date, and cut it short to compensate. and of course i’m not calling her again. not too complicated. i’m a guy who dates a good bit and wants sex to mean something… yeah we f-ing exist lol. a date is a date, no games. if she’s into you, she’s into you, and if she’s not, or afraid to show that she is, she’s not worth your time. i date grown ups.

  38. Is getting laid that difficult? Im reading this, and Im just like; wow. Who gives an F about the dinner bill. If its that hard why not keep the money and spend it on a prostitute sounds like it might more of what you all want here. NEWSFLASH guys want to sleep with girls and girls want to sleep with guys, doesnt need to be this hysterical or complicated…really.

    1. Agreed. Author is obviously a game playing man-child who thinks too much about this kind of stuff. It probably gets him telling people on the internet that he had sex – as far as I can see – that is the main point of this banal article.

  39. Weird.
    I’m a woman who was recently broken up with because I wanted to split our dates and he said it was too ‘masculine’.
    I’ve also been on my share of first dates where I offered to pay and the guy later said they though it was my way of saying ‘not interested.’
    So which is it? Keep getting rejected because I offer to pay my own way, or let the guy pay and be rejected for that?

    1. good answer. im old fashioned and grateful for what i’ve got in my life. i won’t offer the dinner date unless i actually like her. and if i like her, i’m gonna pay. if she uses me and the jokes on me for the evening guess what… it’s one f-king dinner lol. who gives a crap. there’s more where she came from. people aren’t inherently bad, there’s creepy a-holes male and female out there.

  40. A good tip for getting laid in general is to not be creepy, misogynistic, sexist, and just a general a**hole. Then maybe you might have a chance, but if your on this website most likely not.

  41. geez some girl must have really hurt you or you were teased in high school for not being manly enough. grow some balls.

  42. I am DYING laughing reading these posts (with the exception of a couple)…I bet you guys haven’t had a date in ages! Trust me, a girl can smell a CHEAPSKATE from a mile away!!! And you all reek of it!….men have invented the term “gold digger” to get out of their duties of providing/chivalry/good manners…trust me, if you want a classy lady, you will take her to dinner. A guy that doesn’t pay/take me to dinner is automatically friend-zoned. I would never consider a relationship with him. Now I know why there are so many of you like this…..horrible advice from this article.

    1. or you could have a coffee date, offer to “take her to dinner” some time, she says she’d like that. then says something like “i’m really just looking to make friends, wanted to clarify that.” but STILL expects you to pay lol… sorry ladies, we’re not all 1 day old morons. that crap might work in high school but i wouldn’t try that particular scheme as an adult.

  43. At work we have to watch videos on how to spot and prevent sexual assault and this guy sounds like the rapists they were interviewing in the video ( rapists already in prison)….plotting scenarios to get women drunk with the purpose of having sex…like the “brunch” idea….how sad to know that there are men like this dude around.

  44. Here is the thing- if you are just looking for sex and that’s it, then fine. This guy is being honest and upfront with himself, with the woman he is having sex with, and with us here on the internet. He is not going to buy some woman dinner and bitch and wine when he doesn’t get sex. Everything about him and the woman he was sleeping with seems to be mutual. Unfortunately the man in the example who paid for the theoretical woman’s dinner was doing something bad- buying dinner for someone and hoping she would one day give him a relationship or sex. I would watch out for the hypothetical lady though, if she is lying to the man who buys her dinner, she is probably lying to you about something- may cause a mess later. Always respect a person who sleeps around too whether you are a man or woman having sex with a man or woman, afterall, you are doing just that too.
    Be an ethical slut to everyone who identifies as such!

  45. This is flawed because the woman I like actually knows how to cook. She has her own vegetable garden for gods sakes lol. A close friend of hers has mentioned to me that she is interested in me and wants to see where things go but seriously I’m not doing all that stuff! lol.

  46. Don’t buy a woman anything until after you’ve had sex with them. Any male bitch who buys that is regulating himself to only take home women with multiple kids and whores. Plain and simple you will pay before you play and no investment no panty dropping..this goes for women who think highly of themselves. This post is for men who are trash and can only obtain trashy, low self-esteem women. Women who value themselves won’t give themselves away to men who can’t meet their standards.

  47. This does not work if you are not from western culture… it won’t work in india… so please dont take this too literally or else you will get her wondering what is wrong with you. the worst seducers are those who take advices too literally, everything depends on circumstances and the woman you are dealing with.

  48. What if your goal is to get her fall for you ?? what if your goal is not sex…. sex isnt a big deal, just pay some money to escort and have sex with her, no need to put lots of hardwork and effort just for sex

  49. Am I missing something here?!! This dude is a JERK!! I’ve had this happen to me too many times and it’s come (no pun intended) to where I agree to meet them for drinks and eat first before I meet them…just in case they have ideas of ripping me off like this woman is doing to Peter. In other words if it were me, I wouldn’t even bother with her. Let the dude she’s hooking up with buy her dinner.

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