The following is a sponsored article from Girls Chase.
Chase Amante checking in again. We’re going to take a bit of a diversion from our regularly scheduled promotional activities to dispel a musty old chestnut today instead.
In some parts of the manosphere, there is a belief that “game” doesn’t work. It used to be that these guys would tell you it didn’t work at all. Nowadays they use a more nuanced argument: it DID used to work, ten years ago. It’s just that NOW it doesn’t work (anymore). That was a comment in the comment section on my last article… and while I appreciate a bunch of people called that commentator out, I want to address this position directly.
The idea you can learn to socialize and become better with people through experience rubs some guys really wrong. Some of these men have never approached anything as a skill set. The idea of skill building in general offends their “just be yourself” sensibilities. It can also be that these are men who have developed specific non-social skills… and it makes them feel small to see men who’ve ignored those skills zip around them with girls.
When you’ve plowed a ton of time into cash, or muscles, or social status, and some guy without any of that gets the girl you wanted instead, it hurts. It can also be that some of these men have sworn off women completely. These men would like you to do the same. The only way women will learn to be more pliant, they’ll tell you, is for men to boycott them en masse.
Whether a guy is a “just be yourself”er or he’s a “muscles/money/status are all you need”er or he’s a MGTOW, the end result is the same: he thinks it’s a waste of time to learn to socialize. Which, of course, as you might guess, I’m going to tell you is wholly and completely ridiculous.
You Want The Results, You Build The Skill
Want big muscles? You learn how to lift. You learn how to feed yourself. You learn how often to hit the gym versus how often to rest. The biggest guys are also the biggest EXPERTS on bodybuilding… find one big guy who can’t write you an encyclopedia on feeding and resting and lifting and I’ll bet you he uses synthol.
Much of this knowledge you pick up as you go. But you do pick it up – because you’re interested in it, because you want to excel at it, because you focus on it. You study it, you talk to others who study it, you experiment, you implement. You adjust. You tweak. Your body is your own personal laboratory.
So it is in business. If you want to make a lot of money running a business, you’ve got to be an expert on running businesses. This takes endless study and implementation. You have to learn marketing. You have to learn hiring. You have to learn firing (its own unique skill set). You have to learn customer retention. You have to learn product construction. You have to learn how to advertise, because if you can’t advertise your business will always be limited to the capriciousness of what’s popular now and what isn’t. You have to learn to make things convert. You have to learn taxes (bloody taxes) and what you are legally allowed or not allowed to say, sell, and do.
Even if all you want is a lifestyle business (where you make just enough to pay the bills, then spend the rest of the day on the beach), you will still have to learn much of this. Not as much as the guy who aspires to a penthouse full of cash and a huge reach in the market, but you’re going to have to study, and you’re going to have to work. There is no four hour workweek – unless you’re on food stamps.
The real four hour workweek.
Just like it is with muscles, just like it is with business, it is this way with socialization. If a guy wants to tell you you do NOT need to learn how to socialize, yet still reap all the results you want, he is not your friend. He’s at best misguided; at worst, he’s a saboteur.
The successful socializer knows how to bond with people. He knows how to approach new people. He knows how to flirt. He knows how to crack jokes. He knows the right times to touch other people and where and how to touch them. He knows how to take the lead, and when to back off. He knows how to deal with other men trying to tool him or steal his girl. He knows how to go on offense and pluck away a woman he wants whom other guys want too. He knows how to turn around situations that have gone belly up. He knows how to find out all sorts of things from other people, so he knows whom he’s dealing with and isn’t getting conned. He knows how to invite the women he wants onto dates, to his place, and into bed. He knows how to make a move, and what to do when he encounters resistance. And he knows how to keep women coming back to him again and again, in love with him, devoted to him.
Like muscles, and like business, this is a skill set. It is a DEEP skill set, and it is NOT a casual skill set. You are born with social instincts – but so is every other man. And when you wade into the social arena, you wade into a competition with every other man out there.
Some of those men have muscles or money, but don’t know how to use them. Those men are not a threat to you. A few of them have these things, AND have well developed social skills. These are men you need to watch out for.
Of course, social success depends on two parts. It is one part your fundamentals – that’s your appearance, your mannerisms, your movement speed, voice, hairstyle, fashion, physique, nonverbals. And the other part of it is “game”… that is, what you KNOW how to do: all those things we just talked about successful socializers being able to do.
If you don’t know how to do these things, you are the fat guy at the gym who figures maybe he’ll try the bench press and get jacked. Or you are the impoverished guy with a website who thinks maybe he’ll write a few blog posts and throw on some Google AdSense. You’ve gotta start somewhere, but if a guy never gets more serious than this, his game (be that gym game, money game, or girl game) will never get off the ground.
If you want some science though, here it is: a study of New York state college students found, as we might guess, that the better a guy knows how to successfully navigate mating interactions, the more often he gets laid.
Surprising? It shouldn’t be. You’d think it’d be common sense, right?
If you want to be GOOD at something (like getting a hot girlfriend, or getting laid a lot more regularly), you’d think you’d want to STUDY that thing and PRACTICE that thing, right?
Get Part 3 Of My Dating And Attraction Model
I was going to write about compliance this time, and tell you how to get girls to invest more in you. Because what a lot of guys do is spend a lot of time trying to invest in women themselves… which is very nice, and women appreciate it, but it doesn’t turn them on.
Instead, this became a discussion on whether “game” still works or is out-dated or what. Which is really very silly – we’re a social species. Learning the underlying principles of sound socialization will not go out of fashion anytime soon.
Video #3 of my series of One Date videos is now out. In this video, I introduce you to the third part of the SAC formula – a science-based, and extremely thoroughly tested, TIMELESS way to suss out what a girl needs from you to end up in your bed and as your girlfriend. This is the model every successful Casanova caveman from 20,000 years ago intuitively learned, and that every guy who gets the girl he wants TODAY either figures out or stumbles on by accident. What were care about are the underlying principles here. How you use it, I leave up to you.
Give it a watch, let’s get you plugged into SAC, and let’s dial your mating intelligence up a bit (or more than a bit)… so you can be one of the guys who gets laid more, and with more of the women he wants, too. Click the image below…
Give this video a watch, and let’s get girls to invest in you.
⇒ Watch The Video And Get Girls Complying With You
And in a few more days, I’ll get one final article for you up, right here at ROK.
Cheers,
Chase Amante
Great stuff!
I’m convinced game does work, but is it worthwhile learning the trade of a confidence trickster just to get laid? I’ve always found it easier just to pay, no game at all needed, earning money is easy, and no wasted time.
Even if you pay like I often did when I went to Asia, I discovered a little bit of game really improved the experience. The girls have a lot more fun and are much more enthusiastic when you bring them to your room. Sometimes they will even stay an extra night or two at no additional cost.
@ JD
+1
But just like earning money is easy for some of us, having the “gift of gab” is easy and comes natural to others. Or being born a “Chad” (lucky bastards). Like I said below, we’re all different…
AS
I’m just glad I wasn’t born an incel, living in mom’s basement.
#metoo
JOHN
Again, you are confusing the era we grew up in the UK and the States with NOW.
40 years ago when you were a teenager or even 20 when I was a teenager people left home at 16 and simply got a job. No big deal.
These days, 25 year old men cannot leave home. And not only that, but they are like 15 year old kids, wanking to porn and playing video games.
THEY HAVE NEVER BEEN ANYWHERE ALONE.
This is what is so remarkable. When I was young, Americans did a so-called gap year where they bummed around like the two graduates in American Werewolf in London.
They knew the world. They had worked for a while in a pub in London, or picked fruit around Australia, or thumbed rides down to Greece or worked in fish factories in Alaska.
They went to Amsterdam (All UK and American kids used to do this) AND FUCKED PROSTITUTES.
They spent 2 years in the Navy or Merchant Marines.
Nowadays guys live at home-and I mean have never so much as washed their own clothes-until they are 25 or 30.
They are like the fucking peasants of feudal Europe who never traveled 10 miles away from wherever they were born.
MM,
I’ve always been good at making money, I have 10 different ideas to make money every day. But I had finished making money at age 45 when I retired, don’t have any need to make more. I never wanted to be rich, I just wanted to not work.
JOHN
I have to agree with you.
And to be honest the professionals are better than the slags anyhow.
Game is for life and nailing chicks is secondary. Let’s face it, if you are not wearing your emotions on your sleeve or showing your hand, you are practicing some sort of game (good or bad). Withdrawal from game and you will pay a price. Keep friends at arms length and smash the competition.
“Game” only works for the genetically or financially blessed. There are no exceptions.
Looks and money help, but they really don’t go that far. If you think that game is only about picking up chicks and getting laid, then you’re clearly not seeing the big picture. Game is about facing your fears (which are 95% imaginary but feel entirely real), taking action, sharpening your social skills, and just being an overall better person. Scoring with women is just one application of game. Want to be more charismatic at office parties? Learn game. Want to be a better at sales? Learn game. In short, game is about life.
1. why would i want to become more “charismatic” at office parties?
2. What is an “office party”? a business meeting in a bar? or an opened champagne bottle after work? or going to a bar with your friends at the office? is being charismatic something else than being yourself with good manners and respect to yourself and everything you encounter a.k.a having your own identity?
is the term “more charismatic” synonymous to simply having your own identity without being a narcissistic braindead annoying prick?
Hoos, incorrect and drop the fucking attitude. Take it! Take what belongs to you. Audacity followed by more audacity. Take it. Audacity audacity audacity audacity…..
@ CM
You have a good, aggressive attitude, and I am sure you do great in life, but that type of self image is usually something that is built up over the years. Did you have a good father, who trained you to be a man? Were you born with a mesomorphic frame? Were you good at sports in school, with lots of great friends who respected you and pretty girls who wanted to date you? If yes, then that is what made you who you are today. Try looking at it from the other side of the coin. The skinny school weakling who everyone shitted on when growing up. Do you have any idea how hard it is to break that mold? Almost impossible. Maybe just the fact that this type of guy didn’t suicide himself or become a serial killer or mass murderer is a victory. And maybe if he was able to use his Omega/Ectomorphic intellect to make money, become well off, and do pretty much what he wants (within reason) is another victory. We all have different experiences that make us what we are.
It depends. I think PUA boot camps are a scam, but many of the things that “game” espouses are actually psychological techniques to make yourself appear more socially dominant. For example, lightly touching someone on a non sexual body part like the arm or elbow, generally has a higher rate of getting them to comply with a request.
As far as looks go, I mean, you do have to meet some minimum threshold of looks. If you have something like Down Syndrome or whatever what effects your facial features, you can learn all the “Game” you want, it’s going to be seriously hampered by your looks. A relatively decent looking guy who may be hampered by a lack of confidence or social skills which need improving would benefit the most. A relatively decent looking guy with money hampered by a lack of confidence or impaired social skills would benefit even more.
Age is another contentious subject. Most guys well into middle age are going to have it harder getting a woman in her late teens, 20s even early 30’s. If they aren’t willing to spend money.
The exception to the rule would be some type of super masculine, in shape middle age guy. A guy who might be 50, works as a mechanic or blue collar type of job, likes to drink, younger guys know not to fuck with him, he’s still very physically strong and capable has one of those tough guy type of personalities, owns guns, voted for Trump, uses racial and sexist slurs, made a gay couple cry by calling them fairies or queer or fag and still has a full head of hair or completely bald, but never balding.
Those are typically the type of older (meaning middle age) guys who are banging much younger women in their 20’s without having to spend a small fortune.
@ Harold
50 y/o construction worker???
Maybe the guy in his 50s who OWNS the construction company (and is muscular/handsome as well), but 50 y/o blue collar guy making $70K-100K/year is going to have a very difficult time pulling girls 19-29.
Regardless of his looks/build.
Difficult, but not impossible…
Is $70K -$100K/year not a lot to you? Damn I wish I was making $70K right now LOL
AutomaticSlim, what do you do for work??
@ CJ
I am an IT consultant. Been in the field for 30 years, and as an independent consultant for over 20 years. I work with the Wall St. firms.
Here in NY, $100K is not much at all. Suburban cops and teachers with “tenure” make more than that. And tradesmen in certain fields can make that with overtime. There is a NY State web site that lists all public employee salaries. A jerk I went to HS with became a cop after several failures at other jobs. He is now a Sergeant in a local suburban village (no crime) and he makes $130K/year. This guy has no college and used to sell coke! He did seem to clean up his life though. Got married and has a decent family.
Not necessarily a construction worker…..just one of those tough guy, hyper macho types who’s still in good shape is what I was getting at. When I do see middle aged guys who can get significantly younger women, it’s usually those kind.
Not financial — unless > $10M.
Or perhaps $5M at the least.
Guys who are simply “well off” are not “chick magnets”…trust me on this.
“Well off” got you a hot girl prior to the late 60s.
Not any more.
Aye, the Cap’n is tacking a true course. I’ve mentioned here that I’ve never stopped “pursuing” the wife since it’s important to remind her- even subconsciously, of who is in charge of the relationship without being mean, overbearing or petty. Besides, it’s important for her to understand that if she wants to continue to feel desirable and desired, than she needs to understand that my expectations- which are not unachievable, should be hers for the sake of our relationship and sanity. Look pretty, keep the weight in check, be healthy inside and out, endeavor to embrace the feminine arts, be conversational, (Exercise the brain housing group.) and avoid nagging- which is a slow death for me and her. Oh, and don’t be mistreating my dog.
Ray, even just the slightest bit of calculated unpredictability is “game.” Game is everything. Without game, you are a robot programmed by someone. Embrace game. Your opponents will indirectly commend your for your efforts. You will never know. Nor will they. Let your game rise with your instincts. Let your instincts become your new level of game.
RAy,
Been with my wife 8 years, don’t play any game on her, would quite frankly be happy for the opportunity to move a younger one in. The wife can leave whenever she likes (divorce here costs $1), there’s a whole host of slim, young Asian women who would like the chance to share my small pension.
JOHN
Same with my wife. I sank $60,000 into her house and she could sell it for $100,000 but overall I have not lost my life.
She is from a more influential Chinese Thai family so no way would any legal conflict end up in my favor. I would simply have to walk off. My children belong to that society. I’ve never even bothered to obtain US passports for them.
Some foreigners get into conflicts with their wives and take them to court and after 7 years of paying for a lawyer’s car they end up with nothing anyhow.
I would not bother.
If we split up, which would never happen, I’ve had a good run of it and who gives a damn?
I agree, walking away the first time was hard (6 month gap), the second time was easier (one night gap). Now I would be sad for a day or two ….. and another one would move in.
Neil Strauss was just a merchant selling a utopian dream same as feminism, communism, psychoanalysis and multiculturalism
Boy, did they peg the Millennials completely and utterly incorrectly… For a laugh, read: Millennials Rising (2000) about, then, teenage first-wave Millennials.
Taking Kratom still works.
Just the article I needed.
Recently I was swallowed up to my neck in Alt Right anti-semitism and anti-feminism and political trolling.
A timely reminder why I came here in the first place, helps me to re-adjust my focus and to set my priorities staight.
I need a young woman under me more than I need a pogrom to gas the Jews and race war now, or pro-male state legislation.
Cheers, bro, and thank you!
Where the fuck is my comment?
Ah, there it is above. The fuck is happening? I hate this new type of commenting section.
Yeah, that happened to me a few weeks ago…
Liar. I pray to Jesus that when you lie on the next man of sexual assault crimes, it will be an organized crime syndicate who isn’t afraid to use gang violence on you to teach you a lesson on snitches get stitches, or false accusers end up in the dumpster.
You again???
Eeesh.
You have long hair, therefore everything you say is false and cannot be taken seriously.
Long hair is for women.
I do admit that many women want a feminine man (due to lesbian desires), so maybe that is your approach to appear womanly, but it still looks silly.
Had a friend who was “so f-ing hott” said tons of girls. For years he got fine chicks lining up for him. They ALL initiated the hookup. Zero Game he had! He was a lil bitch too. Cryed all the time when mommy an daddy didnt spoil him rotten. He would do sick stuff like inflate his anus with an basketball pump to make huge farts then chase his pals around using the tip of the feces covered b-ball pump. Ride a goped all throughout his house. Including his parents bed. (Comforter got twisted in back wheel, charred melted by exhaust pipe) Escaped fist fights by telling the opponent they were “cool”. Chicks just giggled at his antics and lusted after him.
Girls don’t mind handing out sexual approval to boys, as long as they pay for it through ‘game’ or ‘money’.
You’re good with negotiation, or not. It’s really that simple. If so, getting some random girl to go do something fun and pleasurable…isn’t difficult in the least. You have limited to no investment, whatever risks have been brushed away…it’s binary. You get more then had, or don’t get more then had, SCARY.
Zero sum game is life. If play that on all levels in all interactions, will be a absolute monster to those not, and will have great joy sparring for ℅ with those that do. Anyone that doubts ” game ” is simply a mark. Their incompetence doesn’t negate the art of war.
If one guy Has to have tight game, the car, the clothes, social status etc, and have it all lined up perfectly like some celestial event… To get begrudgenly laid by this girl who deep down isnt sexually attracted to him. Yet the same girl would bang this other guy in a seedy apt, wit pants saggin, no job, neck tat etc. Because he makes her tickley inside and when asked why she can only say “like omg idk”
Your correct, either you have It or you dont. That Doesnt always translate to “game” (such a stoopid ghetto term anyway, so is swagger)
A lot of the article is about lifting weights and making yourself appear more attractive yet I’m supposed to believe it’s social charisma that really gets men laid. Hah, ok.
The last few years I’ve really worked on my appearance. The shit I can get away with now from women that think I’m hot is a big eye opener. A confident ugly man is an arrogant asshole. A confident attractive/rich or high status man is charming, funny with good ‘personality’ to most women. Women are far more visual and shallow than we are led to believe…especially from slick salesman trying to sell men that want pussy a product.
OLD GUY HERE
When I was young, males went to whores at 17. Even if you had a girlfriend you found out what getting your junk made by a pro was about.
You hit Amsterdam. You got laid. You did some drugs to see what that was about. You saw the world.
What is wrong with Gen Y?
Real old guy here.
I didn’t need Amsterdam.
I had 11th Ave and the Liberty Inn.
Even older guy,
I was a slow starter, waited until I was 50, but the last ten years have been really busy. I have the whole of SEA to shop for slim young Asian women.
Could someone kindly offer suggestions of locations where a high quality, normal, healthy female might meet a quality, healthy, normal guy?
No kidding.
I understand the (whole) problem and have been watching it evolve over time. I’m rather used to seeing this so it doesn’t bother me so much.
But I never stop trying.
If you were “high quality,” “quality” guys would’ve already found you (many times over), irrespective of your “location.” And you wouldn’t even need to put much effort into “trying” to get their attention. Given your poor success with “quality” men, perhaps you see yourself as an 8 or a 9. But “quality” guys see a 5 (or maybe a 6, when your makeup is on point…..Of course, this is assuming they notice you at all).