In life, it is often easy to overcomplicate things. After all, complicated can sometimes feel like it should be better than simple.
I have spent a long time trying to develop my skills as a fiction writer. I love literature from all periods, but I have a special fondness for tricksy, postmodern writers like David Foster Wallace, Thomas Pynchon, and William Gaddis. This means that I spent a lot of time trying to emulate their work, writing long, self-referential “meta” narratives that no one in their right mind would want to read.
Then I picked up Bukowski. If you haven’t read him then you should. Dude is red pill as fuck. But the point is, his work is incredibly simple. Women, his 1978 bestseller, recounts his experiences getting drunk and banging a bunch of girls. That’s it. The language he uses is plain and unadorned:
I was 50 years old and I hadn’t been to bed with a woman for four years. I had no women friends, I looked at them as I passed them on the streets or wherever I saw them, but I looked at them without yearning and with a sense of futility. I masturbated regularly, but the idea of having a relationship with a woman—even on no-sexual terms—was beyond my imagination.
Incredibly simple, but it brings to life his loneliness with elegance and economy. A lesser writer might have spent several paragraphs trying to say the same thing.
See The Beauty in Simplicity
I have an analytical mind. I enjoy sophisticated, complex ideas and I get a buzz out of feeling I figured them out. It was like this when I got into the game. I read Neil Strauss, and many other pick-up books. I read Sperm Wars. I read a lot of online forums. Here was a brave new world. Incredible, these new insights into social dynamics and female psychology. Even more incredible when I went out into the field, put them into practice and it worked!
But too much theory, and too much intellectualizing, can over-complicate what is actually a very simple thing. After all, men and women were meeting and having sex long before the internet as invented and game was promulgated through it.
As with writing, the best game is generally the simplest. But sometimes when we read game gurus, or watch their You Tube videos, it is easy to feel we have to live up to some artificial, external standard.
What is Game?
At base, game is incredibly simple:
Opportunity + escalation → Sex
For all the millions of words that have been written on the subject, this simple equation is what it comes down to. You create an opportunity with a woman, you escalate and then you have sex with her.
The only problem is that not every woman will be receptive to your approach, or some obstacle will come up that will derail your attempt. For that reason, you need to create as many opportunities as possible.
The Direct Approach
For a long time, I have used direct game. Shock and awe, if you will. “Hey, you—come here. You’re fucking hot.” There are many variants, but you get the basic idea.
Now granted, that doesn’t sound especially complicated. But the nest of theories about alpha dominance and the display of “dark triad” traits underlying it is. It is a self-consciously “gamey” approach.
Direct works, and it works very well. It works especially well when the girl is already attracted, true. But—and people often fail to realize this—if your approach is strong enough, it can also create attraction in itself. Simply having the balls to approach a woman sober and convey your sexual attraction to her unashamedly and without fear of rejection automatically puts you in the top percentile of men she will encounter. I have got laid through doing just this many, many times. Of course, it helps if you are well-presented and project yourself as a high-value man, but this is within everyone’s reach.
That said, the blow out rate for direct approaches is very high. Why? Because when you put your desire for her out there up front, there really is nowhere else to go in the interaction. It’s a bit like asking a closed question while trying to make a sale. “Do you want to buy this bread or not?” Since you haven’t warmed up the buyer by describing the bread’s features and benefits, they can only make a knee-jerk decision about it—and that decision is not often the one you would like.
The Awesome Power of Indirect
Ask yourself this? Throughout history, men have gotten laid as well as players. How have they managed it?
By starting random, seemingly innocuous conversations with women they’re attracted to.
Recently I have been running a lot of indirect game. The results have been remarkable.
After a period away from hardcore gaming due to work commitments, I decided to get myself back into the swing of talking to random people by asking for directions. I spent an hour asking girls in central London where the Apple store is. This had several effects:
- I saw that some girls would reject the question even though it as entirely innocuous. This made me feel less bad about the times a more obviously sexual approach had been rejected in a similar way in the past.
- It got me into a state of momentum and a great mood very quickly
- I saw that at least a few of the girls I approached were interested in continuing the conversation.
I suppose I had previously been a little snobbish about indirect (even though I’ve used it plenty of times) because I felt that the ballsy “alpha” guy would not hide his intent. However, this brief experiment revealed the awesome power of the indirect opener:
- Going indirect makes you less easy to reject from the beginning, as your request for directions or advice might well be legitimate. Politeness dictates that your target must at least listen and make some kind of response. Because she is unsure of your sexual interest in her, she can’t risk blowing you out harshly.
- An indirect opener give you a couple of seconds more to convey your personality.
- It will get her hamster running on overdrive—“does this guy like me or not?”
- At the same time, strong eye contact will lend the interaction an undercurrent of sexuality.
How to Make Indirect Work for You
- Spot your target. Approach. Put all thoughts of pulling her out of your mind at this point—you are simply going to ask her for information.
- Approach confidently—after all, there’s no reason for you not to (see above).
- Deliver your question. It doesn’t matter what it is. Directions are great. Ask where a certain street is, or store.
- Maintain strong eye contact. This is key. While you shouldn’t look overtly flirtatious, there should be at least a degree of ambiguity in the interaction.
- When she gives her answer, you can fluff talk for a second, keeping up the eye contact (“Ah, I thought it was on Regent Street…”) The purpose of this is to get her to talk a little more so that you can then move into your transition.
- If she seems distracted or keen to move on the walk away. Nothing lost. But if she lingers at all, even barely perceptibly, then move on to the next stage.
Transitioning
- Transition—this is advancing the conversation on from the initial topic. Make a statement about her. It can be anything, for instance, about something she’s wearing. I often comment on her accent. “You sound Portuguese.” It doesn’t matter if you are right or not. In fact, the more wrong you are the better. That way she will likely laugh, and you can bust her on what she comes back with.
- Fluff talk. This is where you need to come across as a relatively normal, well-adjusted human being. “Oh yeah, I went to Portugal once—lovely beaches etc.” Again, simplicity is key. Don’t feel like you need to do anything to clever or gamey. Just have a regular conversation, maintaining strong eye contact all the while.
- Tell a story based on what she says. Recently a girl told me she worked in a maternity clinic. I told her about how when I was a little kid my dad greeted a woman in the park, and told me after she’d passed that she had been my midwife, but that I’d misunderstood and thought he had meant that this woman would one day become my wife. A bullshit story, but mildly amusing if told correctly, with the benefit of a cute kid angle.
- You’ve now been chatting for a few minutes. Hopefully she has been smiling and laughing. Now you should get her contact details. Simply say “Hey, it’s been great chatting. We should hang out sometime—put your number in here,” then hand her your phone.
From an entirely innocuous start, you now have the phone number of a new woman, who you can game via text as normal. Now arrange a date and escalate.
All sounds simple? That’s because it is. Remember, when you strip away all of the PUA bullshit, men and women meeting is the most straightforward thing in the world. Repeat the above formula enough times and I guarantee you will get laid without having to resort to clever tricks and techniques.
Indirect takes the pressure off both you and the girl—you’re not required to act like a sick pimp player, and there is less of a risk of rejection as if you sense she is not interested you can simply move on without losing face (although you should always try to push each interaction as far as you can before throwing in the towel). She isn’t put on the spot so much, and is given the opportunity to meet you and experience your personality in a way that feels natural and straightforward. Everyone wins.
Remember, though—the essence of approaching, particularly in the daytime, is being normal. Nothing is worse than watching some badly-calibrated, super-gamey buffoon attempt to pull. Ask a good friend to be honest with you and tell you how you come across to other people. If any negatives come up then you should take steps to fix these. By all means practice your game at the same time, but realize that being good socially is half the battle.
After that, realize that game can be simpler than you think, and you don’t have to pimp it like a rock star to get laid with hot girls.
For more on how to achieve an abundant sex life with beautiful women click here
Read More: Why It’s Important To Develop An Insane Degree Of Self-Love
You just listed why direct is better = faster to the yes or no. I’m done with small talking, it’s boring… BUT if I were doing indirect I’d have to do it sarcastically. Example: if I’m talking about cats or the weather, I’d do it with a knowing look on my face like, “Yeah, we both know I don’t give a fuck about the weather.”
Direct game is pretty great for not wasting time. You spot the opportunity quicker, and you’re already on your way to escalating.
Indirect leads to dates or “friendship” and then trying to escalate from there. So long as you don’t get oneitis goggles this works though.
But I really like the other basic premise of this article… Never forget that men and women having sex is actually the most normal fucking thing in the world right up there with breathing, eating, and shitting.
But hopefully not all four at once.
Unless you’re in Berlin . . .
I think I’m avoiding Berlin now on my next trip to Europe…lol
And fighting. Over who gets to eat and have sex.
Much of contemporary game is awkward workarounds resulting from societal aversion to just fighting it out.
Or awkward workarounds to deal with the things that have been ‘civilised’ out of us to make the world a ‘safe space’ …
To take a shit, I don’t need to invest several hours, or days before I get some bowel movement. And when I go to bed, I don’t have to get up and try again ten times because the bed rejects me (which really starts to hurt my ego after a while). And I eat my breakfast without fear of STDs, pregnancy or heartbreak.
These bodily functions are not subjects that men have written on at length, their hard-won lessons passed onto the next generation. And for those of us who are autistic losers, we don’t first have to learn how to fake normality and well-adjustment just as a basic requirement to regularly perform those functions.
So please don’t take this the wrong way when I tell you to go fuck yourself, and have a nice day.
Why the hate?
Perhaps I’m taking what you’re saying the wrong way – too literally maybe (again, autistic). But when you tell me that getting a fuck is like taking a shit, it comes across like you’re effectively saying I’m so retarded I ought to be wearing diapers.
Nah, that isn’t what I meant at all. I was trying to make an uplifting post… Trying to say that sex with a woman isn’t supposed to be this “idealistic, pie-in-the-sky magical thing”… I was trying to take it down a notch in perceived significance. I guess I missed that mark. Equating it to a bodily function was meant to say to not build up talking to girls in your head… they’re just human beings… and often much more insecure than they let on.
The Game can be rough. Even the best players say there is basically a 1-2% chance that approaching a girl will lead to sex. That sounds about right to me. If you aren’t willing to be rejected constantly than you aren’t going to have as many sexual opportunities with women… no way to get around that… unless you become famous or something.
I think more importantly than Game is figuring out how to live a life you’d be happy with regardless of whether or not you’ve got women in it.
Just be straightforward about your intentions. Within 15 seconds, a girl will decide whether she would fuck you or not. I’m not really a fan of indirect game, it usually involves beating around the bush and wasting your time. As long as you approach a woman and convey your intentions in a confidently direct manner, you will not have any regrets on the outcome.
Indirect game is just wasting time. Be straightforward. Just approach, say hi, then ask her if she wants to do something with you(movie, country fair, frat party,ect..). While you are out with her, invite her back to your place to do something(like playing halo or watch some dumb funny movie). In the middle of that just start making out with her out of nowhere. Escalate into a bang. Not hard at all.
Indirect has it’s purpose. Especially in day game.
I like this…. if you can impress a girl with an invitation to play Halo then you are truly the man! 🙂
God i miss high school. Not because of the classes. Obviously.
Back in my former geeky days I tried to impress a girl by showing her my RuneScape Account.
That’s still indirect. Instead of directly revealing your intent, you’re using excuses e.g. watching movies and playing halo. If it’s working for you, all well and good, but it’s not direct.
By asking her out I’m pretty much revealing my intend without actually saying it. All women know what you want the moment you approach them. Women need the excuses to allow their rationalization hamster to justify sleeping with you without feeling like a slut.
Yes!
It’s speaking the language of women: The medium is the message.
Sometimes, you need to speak the language of men.
You’re indirectly revealing your intent; hence, it’s indirect. And the hamster can be a double-edged sword with indirect:
On one hand, as you said, it can justify her sleeping with you. On the other hand, it can justify her friendzoning you e.g. “I didn’t know we were dating. I thought we were just hanging out. If only I knew sooner how you felt about me…”
There is another kind of game. Long game, which by its nature is indirect. That is, strike up a flirtatious relationship with a girl at a place you visit regularly (like a coffee shop, store, gym) and you can keep that going for weeks, maybe months. Their desire for you will reach epic levels as they hope and long for you. This strategy is best used when you are in a relationship, to be taken full advantage of when you break up or just held in your back-pocket as leverage over your girlfriend. These girls will do anything for you when you finally pick them up.
that’s true – although you have to keep up the attraction spark, so she doesn’t shove you in the ‘friends’ folder in her mind
True indeed.
100% with you on that too. I always make sure to have at least one of those going whether I’m in a relationship or not. Not only for just the sex once I want it but also for discounts when I visit the store.
I have this going with a flight attendant I met at work, but since she lives in another city, I didn’t get her number yet. Not sure if the logistics of living in different cities are worth it yet. Thinking about emailing her through company email to get her number since we may not cross paths again for a while, but I don’t want to look weak cause I didn’t get her number before in person. Advice?
Excellent post. The thing is, there is not an absolute way, the perfect thing to do. There are downsides to both ways.
The thing I don’t think is good to compromise is the direct subcommunication. You can be chatting the girl with indirect words, but your non-verbal should subcommunicate direct sexual intent. Using indirect words, you can give the girl time to assess your attractiveness while her hindbrain is going nuts over your value.
Exactly – in a way every approach is direct if your sub-communication is on point. What you talk about is secondary.
I think that was talked about by Richard La Ruina in his stealth attraction. If done in the way that he talks about it allows you and the girl to have a secret communication where as on lookers just think you two are having an innocent conversation.
You’re getting it wrong. Subcommunication is not that, because it is the underlying messages you send to girl in every part of the interaction. I guess what you describe are the conspiracy theories that you can share with the girl, the insider jokes that only the two of you share. Like Julien’s line of “say I’m your gay friend”.
Richard in his Stealth Attraction also decribes many non-verbal techniques he uses to create attraction and escalate physically. They are not subcommunication per se, though they use that concept to some extent.
Subcommunication is more like a frame that anything else.
Cheers. I was half watching/had it on as background noise so never really took it all in. I do remember the emphasise on escalation but having it so subtle that only she knows in order not to awake her ‘slut alarm’.
I do recall him saying that he mostly night games though & was specifically talking about night game when going through these techniques.
Not that it really applies to day but can be transferred to some extent.
I really like that formula. I’ve said it once, and I’ll say it one-thousand times; sales is the most empowering profession you can have. You take what you learn and apply it in everyday situations to your benefit. The formula is a skeleton, and everyone can put their own spin on their personal game style, be it direct or indirect.
Direct game is the best game for really hot women because it’s often the only way you are going to get anywhere near close to them as an above average man. Since the chances of being rejected are high either way, you may as well put your balls on the line.
Rejection is easier in that context too because you have zero emotional investment. She is just a pretty face, one among many, and I have never copped a nuclear rejection from a direct approach. I have had some women kind of smirk a little but nothing overly embarassing.
True. Also, its a lot better to get blown out by a hot chick than an average chick.
Hot chicks can be easier to approach too, and friendlier. The most brutal blowouts I’ve had have been from girls in the 6-7 range.
Yeah, I figure that to some extent they kind of respect the balls of an average or slightly above average man trying to converse and hit on them, whereas to a 6 or 7 you are just one of the countless number of men in that range hitting on them and they get annoyed by it.
The hottest chick in the room can often be the biggest bitch, but more often they can be quite pleasant, especially when they are alone.
I know of some pretty ordinary guys that managed to score hot girls by being a little indirect as well. Their appeal just kind of ‘crept up’ on the girls over time and the men in question were able to work it to their advantage when an opening presented itself.
Why do you think that is? I am of the opinion that attractive girls (6s and 7s) get approached the most as the highest-end girls in the 8+ range actually intimidate guys.
Probably because hot chicks get less approaches (I am thinking they intimidate a lot of guys).
And isn’t it the truth that the 6s and 7s try to cockblock you when you talk their hot friend?
Always. It’s ridiculous. i actually think cockblocking has got worse in the last few years.
I got cockblocked badly at a Mayfair bar recently. Chatting to the hottest chick of the bunch, who was nice and friendly but her fugly friends were all over me and not in a good way.
Have to disagree. It’s correlated to the biggest complainers about objectification are usually the least attractive. Women who are genuinely good looking usually don’t have a problem with any of the ways a woman’s sexuality is used, displayed, or it’s various influences in society.
Those 6 or 7 that seem to be harsh in their rejections might think they’re higher than they really are or not, but they want to be 8 and they want to get what the 8’s get. So when it doesn’t happen, result came be what you often get when a woman doesn’t get her way. “Seriously?!!”
And I also don’t agree with men being intimidated by really nice looking women. And least in intimidation meaning being scared of them. Partly because it seems you don’t ever see really nice looking women without somebody, at least when it comes to going out.
But I do agree that really nice looking women very often very nice.
Yeah, that can happen too. Bummer!
That’s why if you are in a situation like that, you walk up to the group of girls and ask the least hot one to dance. The hotter ones will get jealous when they see this because they aren’t used to it, then they will be all over you all night to prove to their less attractive friend that they are still more attractive.
Unsolicited advice is the worst advice of all.
I’ve scored high quality hot girls simply be being unafraid on them, being kind (from a position of strength, not people-pleasing) and showing genuine interest in them without putting them on a pedestal. (You don’t have to do silly neg stuff to show them they’re not on a pedestal.)
I think many 9s and 10s are fed up with being put on pedestals and having nervous guys hit on them awkwardly all the time, and can relax when a guy just treats them as normal people.
I’ve had the most success with indirect game, but looking to potentially transition over to direct (the opposite of you!). I picked up indirect since, just like the article says, it is almost impossible to truly get rejected in indirect game, since you aren’t making your intent clear. In my many approaches, the only time I had a girl blatantly ignore me was when she was wearing headphones. However, if you keep a sexual undertone to the conversation, I think indirect game can be just as effective over time. Just because a girl isn’t willing to sleep with you immediately after you told her “Hey, I think you’re really hot”, doesn’t mean she won’t eventually be down. A girl doesn’t generally become “friends” with a guy she met on the street.
One time I asked a girl for where the best food in the neighborhood is, and after a few exchanges she told me, “Why don’t you check on yelp?” (goddamn smartphones…). Don’t be caught off guard by this one; I answered back “I prefer to interact with actual people versus looking at a screen”. Gives you a lot of value in her eyes! She laughed and the conversation continued.
It’s true that a girl you initially approach directly can be down at a later date…..but it depends if you see her again. The drawback to direct is that once you’ve expressed your interest, if she says no then you haven’t really got anywhere else to go. If it’s a chick you see regularly then fine, you can game her again. But if it’s a random street stop then you may never see her again. That’s why many guys prefer indirect – it gives you a little more time to display personality and attract her.
Great post. I like the thematic outlineon simplicity & then the details & examples to add meat.
I’ve noticed i’ve tended to favor indirect approach in the past few years.
Good reminder to sometimes go in direct with all guns blazing..
As someone new to the concept of game, I appreciate this simple advice.
Question for ROKers: When just starting your game, is it wise to focus on indirect approaches as a good way to build toward getting confident and comfortable with direct approaches in the future?
(Ive finally decided to grow a pair and get used to the awkward uncomfortable situations and rejection that Ive always avoided, but I’m still plagued by approach anxiety. Tips?)
I find the direct approach helps with approach anxiety. If you get rejected who cares? Its just practice. Plus it just gets you talking.
An issue with the indirect approach can be, that because you are basically bullshitting, it can feel forced and unnatural and the girl may pick-up on that. That could hit your confidence.
Btw, one of the worst indirect approaches I witnessed was when my friend asked a girl the time… while wearing a watch. That one went down like the Titanic!
Asking for the time doesn’t work, especially in a time when just about everybody has a mobile/cell phone!!
Not any more but back in the Stone Age (RE early Nineties) it was pretty acceptable.
I’ve used “Can you tell me what time it is? I just flew in from London and I haven’t reset my watch,” many times, works great.
In retrospect, it really was much easier to meet women back then. Whenever I talk to my younger cousins who are in their early to mid 20’s, I do not envy them. One of them still has that provider game mentality that he got from his father, and when I told him it was bunk unless he wanted to marry a girl from S.E Asia, Eastern Europe or Latin America, he wasn’t particularly pleased. He just couldn’t understand why a 24 year old like himself that is already making 6 figures can’t attract a lot of quality women.
Ah… I remember feeling that way. If only I could go back in time and give myself some advice!
Text game fucked everything up in my view. In the late 90’s and very early 00’s you didn’t have to worry about that shit. It was all face to face and there was less flaking as a result. Nowadays it has become increasingly difficult to hold a woman’s attention because she has a million other distractions, including other men.
Yeah but on the other hand once you get the hang of it it’s much more efficient than having up call everyone.
I totally agree with u! These days when u try to talk to her on FB, at least 5 other guys have already sent her a message! U get no where unless it late in the night or she has the hots for u!
Try the advice in the article and approach asking for directions a few times to warm up. Once you’re more comfortable, aim to extend each subsequent conversation just a little. Guaranteed by the end of the session you’ll have had at least one great interaction.
Alternatively, you could try going in with a direct ‘you’re beautiful, I had up talk to you.’ That was my first ever daytime approach. It was like diving off a high board – terrifying then exhilarating. The girl was really flattered. I never looked back.
This reply meant for @armenia4ever btw
Looking back, I think the best strategy to focus on whether your using indirect game or direct game is the improvement of your inner game. This should be your main focus in learning game. Cultivating the attitude of ‘I don’t give a fu*k!’, will work wonders for your self-esteem, and will make your interactions with women fun and interesting again.
Very true.
See below for my thoughts on this mate….
These days the game is more rewarding than the sex.
It can be. The quality of the sex varies but there is nothing like the thrill of the hunt!
Simplicity is key. Do what feels normal or natural depending on the situation.
So your relationship with the the opposite sex is based entirely on lies? Isn’t that a little shallow?
The apple store is on Regent Street. It’s the girl that’s lying
The Thames used to be very shallow but centuries of construction on both banks has brought it to its current depth.
Half right. The construction of the Albert and Victoria embankments helped to deepen the river to its current depth, as did the construction of Teddington weir. But these were necessary following the destruction of London Bridge.
But returning to the question – do you feel contempt for these women that you ‘game’?
I don’t think the question makes sense in the context of this article. We’re talking about how to approach women here.The manner in which you meet a woman does not negate the possibility of your growing to love her later on.
Love (which is a slippery concept, but we’ll let that pass) may come later, developing slowly over time.
Thanks for clearing that up.
To answer your question, no. But a woman’s mind works in a mysterious way with priorities all messed up. “Gaming” is merely a method by which you distract a woman from all the confusion in her head just long enough for her to appreciate the man she finds in front of her.
It’s so unfathomably pathetic and transparent. It’s hilarious seeing these glaringly obvious “boy tap dances of insecurity ” crystallized in published media.
Women use makeup, pushup bras, hair extensions and other cosmetic enhancements daily in order to attract to the opposite sex. The entire mating dance has been about each sex presenting an image to attract the other. The fact that you don’t understand that suggests you are living in fantasy world rather than actual human society.
A friend of mine who’s 49 did a direct approach on a 32 year old chick while he was in Paris for work. Within 3 hours, he pulled her back to his hotel room and closed her. The power of direct game indeed.
Direct is where it’s at. Indirect has it’s uses but direct produces the best results.
It’s interesting that if you ctrl+F the word “love”, it only comes up once in this article (and in the comments) – “I love literature”. Am I missing something about ‘the game’?
Women only love men who do not need them. That is why Game works. It creates in a man a feeling of abundance so that he does not act needy around any particular woman. A man who loves a woman more than she loves him is seen as needy and repellent.
Isn’t love supposed to be equal? Or am I just some boring old fuddy-duddy?
Serious question, and not meaning to be offensive, but don’t you get any enjoyment out of talking to a woman as an equal, discovering common interests, having a stimulating debate about stuff you disagree on, that sort of stuff?
since when do feelings and emotions follow abstract principles?
?? You’re saying feelings and emotions always rational, quantifiable, empirical ???
“…but don’t you get any enjoyment out of talking to a woman as an equal, discovering common interests…”
Yes. We’re both “equally” horny and our “common interest” is sex.
no the exact opposite. I am querying why Mr Jessel believes that an abstract principle, namely that love should be ‘equal’ whatever that means, should precede the feelings and emotions that we would normally consider to constitute ‘love’. In the world he appears to inhabit two people have to satisfy a principle of gender equality in order for physical attraction to follow. The principle of hypergamy for instance contradicts this
Men love idealistically, women love pragmatically / opportunistically. Men will pine away for a woman who they imbue with imaginary perfection. They will call out her name as they are dying on the battlefield. Women, on the other hand, will move on quickly from one man to the next better option and never look back. During war, when a woman’s tribe/nation is defeated, she will immediately hook up with the soldiers of the winning side. Men will fight and die for their ideals, women cannot afford to have ideals, as such notions can get in the way of their survival and their ability to reproduce with the fittest males available to them. This is basic biology, hardwired into our system over millenia. Women know this intuitively, but men resist this truth exactly because they are idealists. A man can only learn the truth the hard way, through heartbreak and betrayal by a woman he thought loved him the same way he loved her, which is biologically impossible for her. This leads to shock, denial, anger, despair, and then eventual acceptance. That last moment is called “swallowing the red pill.” I urge you to read http://www.therationalmale.com for more insights into the behavioral psychology of men and women and why nature has caused us to have different reproductive agendas and different definitions of love.
I love all of that stuff yes – but this is an article about how you should initially approach a woman. What you’re talking about comes later.
I use that “hey you seem pretty cool, put your number in my phone” routine all the time HAHAHAHA.
Roosh’s Day Bang and this article show how awesome Day Game is. I can be myself, making convo without having to do all these, as one respondent on ROK stated, “ninja kicks and back flips” to get a chicks number.
I noticed I got more ass being myself (I dunno how that is for others) than I did first reading ROK. When I read ROK, I would approach women with an angry, bitter, confused and shaky feel. After Day Bang it hit me how what I was doing was awesome all along. Now I just know how to move on, and learn that I don’t need to take crap fr chicks who are not down to have fun and fuck.
Regarding London and Aplpe Store; being social and putting yourself in a location with lots of girls is in and of itself half the battle. Many of those who end up seeking out game advice and PUA clinics, tend to be introverts who quickly tire of being social. Hence, in order to mate, are looking for shortcuts that minimizes the need to be social.
They want the magic punchline, the irresistibly cool fur hat, the bodybuilding program that makes them so hot all they have to do is show up and women will jump them etc. For them, spending 1000 hours lifting by themselves, seems less daunting than spending 3 hours talking to strangers.
Lots of guys are like that. And they are even overrepresented amongst the educated classes who are most apt to hear about, and are able to pay for, game advice. Historically, there was not nearly the selection bias against introversion there is today. The engineer would get laid/married just as often as the sales guy. While nowadays, the engineer plays videogames and powerlifts in the garage, while the sales guy gets all the poon, including the (now female) boss.
I said it once and I’ll say it again……I fukin love tits…..
Here’s a crazy idea: make yourself as Alpha/Greater Beta as possible THEN start hitting on women. The fact the author decorated the article with hot babes and not warpigs shows that looks matter. Creepy nerdlingers will never have a cheat code that will make them irresistible to hot women.
The pics prove that female looks matter . . .
Any guy who think looks don’t apply for men are smoking too many joints. Besides some men can be a 100% composite fail: no looks, no money, no confidence, no charm, no social skills, etc.
I am absolutely not a “good looking guy”, I am what most people would describe as a pretty typical nerd… but I occasionally hang with some guys that look like complete bums. They order a bottle, followed by another bottle and they’re always laughing and having fun… these guys pull in 9s and 10s regularly to the point where they seem to be more interested in the quality drinks than the pussy they could easily score.
Let me reiterate, these guys look atrocious and pull in gorgeous women. Looks do not matter for men.
I was once ‘direct’ gamed by a woman…yes, just the once. The first thing she said to me was, “Okay, I’ll sleep with you tonight, but nothing is going to happen…..Who am I trying to kid? We’re going to fuck like rabbits!” And from that, I can confirm the direct approach works!
Sometimes you’ll see the real hiding beauties within your community as they pass in their car. I’m not a cop, nor would I want to be, so forget getting their plate #. But at a stop, you can’t resist the real mamajamas when you spot one out of thousands. A hand signal from window to window. Roll down. ”Hey” or any bullshit ”hey, it’s my birthday . . I’m just feeling older today, what u doin?” or ”you look like somebody, you know so and so”. Before the light turns is essential ”cool, what’s your number – quick”
KISS : Keep It Simple Stupid.
Mode one baby!
I find it amusing when someone suggests something that is obvious. Of COURSE men have been using indrect game for some time. “What’s your sign?” “Do you have the time?” And women are often wary of such approaches hence their animosity to what appears to be a simple question: “Do you know where the apple store is?” She probably suspects you’re one of the indirect gamers on a different quest: Begging for money. I sure know I regard people who ask me seemingly innocent questions on the street with suspicion.
Heck, women at bars and even on the street have been “hit on” so many times by indirect approaches that they are jaded by them and even insulted which is why more direct game works. The women find it refreshing sometimes.
One VERY successful gamer I know used clever lines. Original one he crafted to the situation. He met his wife with the line: “If I don’t ask you out, I’ll regret it for the rest of my life.” Delivering the line with a straight face and sincerity was the key.
hmmmm. . . . the article is actually a re-appraisal of indirect. i’m not claiming that it’s some radical new method – quite the opposite, in fact. I’m just saying that a simple approach can work, contrary to the belief of many men who feel that they need to do something more ‘clever’ and gamey.
But yeah, direct often cuts through the crap, which is why it has been my default for some time.
I don’t see how your friend’s line is particularly tailored to the context, it’s just a variant on a very common approach. But as you say, in the end it’s all about sub-communication.
Excellent article.
A good read about day game!
Good article
This is a good article and the flow seems quite straightforward. The trickiest part seems to be the transition from fluff talk to the story. Ideally the story should relate to the fluff talk in some way for the flow to be more natural. This isn’t always easy to achieve.
Women will respond to being acknowledged, so it’s really up to men to tip them in a positive direction. Sad, but true, that it is pretty fucking easy.