As a group, the manosphere is continually labeled misogynistic. While I’ve yet to hear of one man ever losing a wink of sleep over it, I have seen many men embrace the title with an aloof smirk on their face – and that includes me.
“You’re such a misogynist!”
“Well, I have been practicing [playful smirk] … [get laid].”
I honestly think 99% of the men in these parts are displaying bogus misogynist credentials in order to gain access to mountains of poosy since women of all ages and social/professional varieties seem to gravitate toward those types of men. While I don’t blame them and often engage in this myself, I feel it is my duty as a manosphere writer to point out inconsistencies even when those inconsistencies are apparent in our own camp and I am a part of the problem.
Call yourself masculine, an asshole, a jerk, a player or an alpha male – but don’t call yourself a misogynist unless you’ve earned it. If you want to be a true misogynist, you’re going to have to do a lot better than an aloof attitude, player lifestyle, or cracking the occasional rape joke just to dim the countenance of a feminist shrew.
When it comes to really hating women and being a true misogynist, it’s not enough to hookup with a bunch of girls who fight for their right to have hookups. The two kind of cancel each other out.
It’s not enough to say something “piggish” because even the women who denounce it flash a quick smile if they find you attractive. That’s why you said it in the first place.
It’s not enough to pump-and-dump a bunch of women. They say they don’t need a man anyway, so you’re basically just helping them out with that. Plus, the real term should be “pump-and-dump-her-before-she-dumps-you-for-some-bad-boy-who-has-the-balls-to-pump-and-dump-her-because-she-likes-the-challenge” but that’s a little too long to keep writing out.
It’s not enough to crack rape jokes when you’re the kind of man who would risk bodily harm to pull a perv rapist off of some woman you don’t even know. If you really thought rape was ok or funny, you’d be a rapist or at least a rapist sympathizer.
It’s not enough to call women bitches. We both know you’d exchange your own life for the safety of your wife, mother, sisters, daughters, nieces, and in some cases (if you’re a misguided white knight) your girlfriend.
It’s not enough to promote gender roles when study after study shows women are happier, marriages last longer, and the sex is better when couples liaise in a traditional manner. That actually makes you the opposite of a misogynist.
Now these masculine actions may cause Sandra Fluke’s penis to chub in angry arousal or make some fat Jezebel writer crack open a second pint of Ben & Jerry’s as her porky little sausage fingers feverishly pound the keyboard in a way no man would ever want to pound her, but it’s not misogyny. If you really want to be a better misogynist, you may want to consider doubling down on the hate and doing something that destroys women (or at least permanently scars them.) Here’s what I suggest:
1. Convince them there is no such thing as feminine strength.
Do your best to convince women that anything and everything that is feminine is weak. Teach them that being the primary influence in the next generation’s life is oppression, and that outsourcing their biological and moral duties to a daycare center is a good idea. Teach them that their natural ability to be loving, caring, and nurturing while still having the fearlessness, tenacity and strength of a pissed off grizzly bear when someone attacks their family is a stereotype that should be avoided. Teach her that the natural masculine traits which garner her natural feminine attention only exist to take advantage of and oppress her.
When she does succumb to the allure of masculinity (and she will), teach her that the masculine man’s propensity to love, value, protect, and defend her is creepy and controlling. If you can pull this off until you see a bunch of 45 year old women stuck in cubicles bitching about their weak husbands and talking about how much they miss seeing their children grow up, you sir can rightly call yourself a misogynist.
2. Trap them in slut culture.
Promote a hookup slut culture where alpha males can opt out whenever they choose and still attract the type of women they desire, but slutty women can’t opt out and attract an alpha male who has options. This will create an environment where “settling” is something that only weak men and strong women do. This will also force the less-adventurous women to slut it up for alpha pleasure, because if they try to act like ladies and be selective, they will quickly lose the attention of the most desirable men who have a plethora of other easy sex options.
When you force women to either put out quickly or risk a life of social solitude, you reinforce the idea that their primary contribution to society is booty, which will make them opt in to #1 above to prove their worth. Organize a slut walk or something. This is a brilliant self-sustaining cycle guaranteed to keep women unhappy, and only a true misogynist would dare go this far.
3. Convince them that Mother Nature and Father Time keep shoddy records.
Fertility declines far more rapidly than an organization’s need for female workers to push paper or ship a few extra widgets. Convince women that biology will wait for them while they pick up that MBA and climb the corporate ladder. America is a place where a woman actually can have it all: she can be a beloved wife, a good mother and raise a wonderful family AND she can go to grad school and have a brilliant career. The trick is to get women to switch the two priorities so they go for the career first and the family later instead of the other way around which is a far more logical and biologically sound approach. This will ensure both choices are more difficult, less enjoyable, and have a negative impact on each other.
When women are overworked and overloaded physically and mentally, they cannot be the mother or employee they truly want to be. This mental tug of war will tear at their soul until they pack on additional body fat and need Prozac to manage the depression brought on by fatigue and guilt. A true misogynist would enjoy keeping women depressed, drugged up, and in a constant state of guilt.
4. Create a perma-victim female society.
Someone who truly hates women will incite fear by convincing them that everyone is out to get them. By ensuring a fear-fueled perma-victim female society and setting yourself up as their defender, you can enjoy a loyal following as you fight the perceived enemy. A confused and frightened population is easily manipulated, and the true misogynist knows how to inflict pain and then leverage it to win Presidential elections, push legislation, and shame the men and women who dare step out of line in order to maintain power. Once you get the majority of the female population to a place where they can’t be strong and independent without your leadership and social support – an oxymoron of epic proportions – you can add “evil genius” to your misogynist title.
This is a cruel textbook example of sociopathy, but if you want to be a real misogynist, you’ve got to keep women in perma-victim status so you can manipulate them like little children.
5. Turn the Feminist Lite™ into a Radical Feminist.
Most women these days will occasionally spout off feminist talking points, but it’s usually relatively harmless tripe regarding equal outcomes opportunity, guaranteed success access, or the removal of gender-based consequences barriers. These statements can be easily dismissed or ignored because the Feminist Lite™ will forget all about her so-called deeply held feminist beliefs when she gets a good stiff alpha pole inside of her or she becomes pregnant and magically turns into a conservative traditionalist. The true misogynist will find these Feminist Lite™ girls and turn them into Radical Feminists while they’re young. Radical feminism isn’t anti-male at all; it’s actually anti-female.
Radical feminists don’t want women to be more like men or men to be more like women – radical feminists want women to become just like they are: fat, ugly, unhappy, and mad at the world for taking notice. Radical feminists are the biggest misogynists on the planet, which is why Roosh’s article “The 9 Ugliest Feminists In America” could have also been titled “The 9 Biggest Misogynists In America.”
So basically, if you’re really interested in learning how to become a woman-hating misogynist who is intimidated by feminine strength and jealous of feminine beauty, you need to stop reading Return of Kings and head over to Jezebel or Feministing. They’re the experts.
Read Next: Being A Misogynist Can Help You Get Laid
Hah, I saw where that was going midway through point #1. Good article – it would have be nice for it not to have been necessary for you to have included the final explanatory paragraph, but then without it I fear the satire may have gone over a lot of heads.
I hope that goes viral
Get ready for the onslaught of female “how dare you” comments. Women are not exactly known to be masters of understanding or deploying irony and sarcasm so the final paragraph was necessary even though a lot of hamsters will comment before even reading that far down the line.
Its not Rape if you yell Surprise!
surprise sex it’s called
lol This was pretty good.
Thumbs up.
-Derek
*slow clap* ..Genius.
The next step to the manosphere message would be turning essays like this into well done and polished 2-5minute youtube clips (in my head its a well done cartoon, maybe with flashes of newspaper articles/reels attesting to the statements made about what the feminists have done in the real world. The tone of the narrator should also be a rising crescendo). Stuff that can go viral and affect the zeitgeist.
Excellent article. Much of this applies to blacks in America: How to Become a Better Racist
Exactly. This posts hones in on what we need to do to defeat them in just about every area. They “care” but do far more harm than good.
We shame the fatties but actually get them to loose weight. They “care” about their feelings and leave them drowning in sorrow and Ben & Jerry’s.
The masculine shaming approach to correction is invaluable and has been forgotten. Kudos to the author of this article. You pulled me in and then smacked me upside the head. Bravo, ’cause that shit ain’t easy to pull.
Whatever happened to “tough love.” It was never used in a negative context but I haven’t heard the phrase in years.
^ Bad wording, but you get what I mean.
I’m already a pretty damn good misogynist but I guess there’s always room for improvement
I see what you did there.
100% sure this article will glide right over the heads of the cum receptacles over at Jizzabel.
Hahaha if any of you think this will be taken as satire
Excellent treatise my good man!
Feminazis will be bitchin an hatin in 3 2 1
Yeah, I can never really pull off the true misogynist schtick, because I love women too much. But a few comments like, “I treat posters like I do women, when they get wrinkled, I get a new one” tends to get some of them screaming one thing, while they are getting moist and find that “chauvinist pig” quite interesting… And they don’t understand why…
Of course, all you have to do is appreciate women for being feminine, and acknowledge that women enjoy being led and lead them, and there are some who will criticize you. But, the ones that willingly flock to you, more than make up for it…
Feminists are the ones that truly hate women, and everything that it is to be a woman, by trying to force them to be what they aren’t. Feminists show their hatred by trying to make women, BE MEN. I can’t think of anything more cruel. But then, liberals are very good at “think speak” with the media backing them up every step of the way. But in the end – it is doomed for a very simple reason, the result is that “success” is the ultimate failure for women – and that message is becoming all too clear. Those who embrace those ideals and try to be “men” find that while there are men who will “try” to be women – it cannot last… And the seeds of it’s destruction are sown with it’s ideology within a generation or two.
I think that is why so many Feminists practically froth at the mouth when faced with the truth. They somehow take solace in young women making the same mistakes that they did.
Feminism isn’t a new thing. At all. You’re a fucking idiot.
Tsk, tsk…that was sort of rude, wasn’t it?
Superb writing, Edward. This is “agree & amplify” on a macro level, love it…
lol. good one.
hell, i hit on my female readers and the female blogs i lonk are filed as my “blog ho’s”
NONE of them were offended. by it.
This was hilarious and insightful. Kudos, Mr. Thatch, Kudos!
I don’t really see why a woman has to be “strong”. I think it really goes against nature.
I hear you, dude. Next time you get cancer, don’t use drugs. They’re unnatural.
Giving birth is for the weak, bro!
I like the way you think.
Excellent article! Hope to see more zingers of this quality.
Roosh, take notice.
The amount of ignorance on this website makes my brain hurt. Also makes me want to drown you all in bleach. I pity all you sad little boys 🙁
“I disagree with what you said so instead of explaining why our opinions differ, I’ll talk about killing dozens of people I’ve never metand then throw in a little shaming for good measure.”
+1
not ignorance sweety, its your brain cells starting to work for the very first time, but dont worry it will go back to sleep right away if you just leave the site.
thumbs up sir!!!
As a woman, I have to say that I actually LOVED this article. Now to be fair, I’m not exactly a normal, modern woman. I am submissive to my husband, meaning he leads and I follow. Anyway it’s refreshing to see something that builds him up for being masculine without making him an evil woman hater. And it kinda makes me happy that not everyone looks down on a woman who wants to be led by her husband. Because in all honesty I feel more loved, cherished and feminine in this male led relationship than in any ‘equal’ relationship. I’m getting off topic (insert girl joke). Point is, I loved the article and the real misogynists need to mind their own business and let men be men and women be women.
TOTALLY AGREE 100%.
I am submissive to my husband, meaning he leads and I follow… until I get bored or unhaaappy and decide Eat, Pray, Love him with the full proxy-violence force of society and the law.
You left out that last bit.
Your “submission” is a charade. In reality– by virtue of having the “nuclear option” of divorce, false accusations and the entire feminist victim industry apparatus at your disposal– you are “topping from the bottom.” Ergo, your husband is a submissive. That’s creepy.
I think we have a REAL misogynist here…
“Your ‘submission’ is a charade.”
No, her submission is not a charade. Her relationship with her husband and the divorce laws are not the same. The divorce laws don’t cancel out her submission to her husband. There are plenty of submissive Amish women, submissive Orthodox Jewish women, and submissive mulsim women in the USA. The divorce laws don’t make those women’s relationship to their husband a charade.
Ummm…You do realise this essay is satire, right?
It’s what you call ‘honest satire’. You know, where the irony is that it’s true, not that they’re being sarcastic.
100% agree. ROCK THE FUCK ON.
Here’s another way to be misogynist.
Teach our children that any person-noun that denotes female gender — waitress, stewardess, actress, etc. — denotes inferiority and must be eliminated. Only person-nouns that denote male or neutral gender have value. Yes, even “neutral” is better than “female.”
Teach girls and women to replace “actress” with “actor,” waitress with the gender-neutral “server” and stewardess with gender-neutral “flight attendant.”
[I never, ever understood why feminists don’t promote the value and worth of female gender person-nouns like “actress.]
“Misogynist: a man who hates women as much as women hate one another.”
H. L. Mencken
Old career slut spinsters who have no value to men telling young women to waste their value by being career sluts.
Didn’t someone say that you should only take advice from people who are living the lives that you want to live?
I love this site! I absolutely fucking abuse my gf right now, make her feel like shit, call her a whore, will soon make her blow my landlord for some rent discount. I think women are idiot for sticking with me. Gentleman every time you are thinking about investing time in a woman think of my idol Samson form the bible. Think about him in the gym and when you bang sluts.
poor bastard was the strongest ever and a bitch fucked him. Learn from Samson’s mistakes.
“It’s not enough to crack rape jokes when you’re the kind of man who
would risk bodily harm to pull a perv rapist off of some woman you don’t
even know.”
I’d rather be raped than saved by a man who respects me as little as the rapist does. That’s a fact.
What an idiotic statement. Let’s examine your logic:
1. You’d rather be raped than saved by someone because you think they have a bad attitude.
2. You don’t articulate how, exactly, this disrespect would manifest itself during the process of Mr. Bad Attitude saving you; would it be when he’s pulling the rapist off your body and risking his own safety in the process, or when he turns to you and says, “are you OK, Miss?” Is that it? Is it because he might say “Miss” instead of “Ms.”?
3. Given that any scenario that would present itself, one in which you’re being raped and a bystander just happened to be present to help you, would unlikely involve the perpetrator practicing safe sex, you’re basically saying, “I would rather be violated by a man who might expose me to disease, or impregnate me, which means I’d either have to have an abortion, or be reminded every day for 9 months of the incident–much like the rapist is violating me again each time, than to have someone save me–just because as he’s pulling the rapist off me, I get the vibe he might think something that doesn’t fit with my views on gender politics.”
Riiiiiiiight. Do you really wonder why so many men think feminists are hysterical idiots?
“It’s not enough to crack rape jokes when you’re the kind of man who
would risk bodily harm to pull a perv rapist off of some woman you don’t
even know.”
Is it enough if I crack rape jokes and first reaction would be to join in or risk bodily harm to save her only for me to get on top after the other rapist is down?
Anyway, the average misogynist is there not for hating women but rather be the normal male that just recognizes facts and if then placed as a misogynist. No! Here is the quick and easy way to tell if you are a misogynist, coming from an actual misogynist.
1: If given the chance and guarantee to get away with it you would torture for hours/days/months a woman then kill her
2: You would purposefully contract and STD only to go fuck dozens of sluts bareback
3: You wish artificial wombs, japanese sex dolls installed with AI, and robots to do all the useless jobs were real, knowing the woman as a species would be extinct.
4: You want to rape women, because you could give two fucks about consent or hero pinion.
5: If you saw a woman being beaten or raped you would join in or just sit back and enjoy the show
6: You don’t exclude your families female population from your misogyny.
7: The idea if beating a woman to death with your bare hands and then fucking her lifeless corpse infront of that girls mother and then cutting off the mothers head turns you on… Well point made.
So are you a misogynist? If so hit me up.
Author is secretly a female Jezebel contributor, lulz
Brilliant
I prayed for years to the God of my understanding that he would make women completely neutral to me … as if they were not even there. And he answered my prayers! Now I do not even notice them, (except for the occasional chuckle when observing their pathetic “look at me” behavior) it is the greatest revelation I have ever had. I have no desire to please them, to be pleased by them, have no emotional needs they can fulfill and best of all… no need to interact on any level with them. I no longer have to participate in the unspoken prostitution game of, “I will give you pussy if you do A….B….C and D for me! (and then they try to manipulate in EFGHIJ&K thinking you don’t notice.. LOL.) When I am horny I rub one out and roll over, or pay a smoking hot 20 year old slut girl to satisfy my primal need to drain my bag inside of her animated flesh container. That my friends…is Misogyny, a natural state for men.
Okay, this was actually really funny and entertaining to read… “fat Jezebel writer crack open a second pint of Ben & Jerry’s as her
porky little sausage fingers feverishly pound the keyboard in a way no
man would ever want to pound her” bahahahahaha.
Nice reply, but whose picture did you steal for your profile?
Um, they’re of me, you idiot. And most of them were taken on a phone or point-and-shoot camera, lol. Nice photography standards you have. I don’t see why anyone would “steal pictures” for their profile. I’m flattered, though.
Riiiight. The supermodel/unicorn gambit. Let me guess: you love men and cook a mean casserole. BTW, LightRoom can wash out photos and Photoshop can do the rest. But you know that, don’t you?
there’s a direct link to my facebook page on this profile in case you want to investigate and see pictures that others have of me, genius. I love ONE man, my boyfriend of five years. I don’t know my way around photo shop at all, though I wish I did. I’ve never been great with computers. But yes, I am an amazing cook (though I don’t really do casseroles often). Some of my food creations should be up on my page somewhere still. And I really don’t have anything to prove to you. I don’t see a picture of you up here, so I’m assuming you’re not exactly easy on the eyes, based on your bitchy. insecure, high school girl attitude.
I’ll answer your implied question first: no, I’m not good-looking, nor did I ever say I was.
Two, who asked about your love life? It sounds like YOU’RE the insecure one, babbling about loving someone (the poor bastard–having to put up with an insecure harpy like you) so much; me thinks the lady doth protest too much.
I don’t really care what you look like and in fact, FB says your profile is unavailable; I just wanted to see if you’d take the bait–which you did like a good, little guppy. Or, should I say tuna? I also got you to criticize yourself on your own computer skills–typical, insecure woman.
BTW, you are indeed cute, but that doesn’t excuse your horrible personality.
1. You said “let me guess; you love men” in your comment, and my reference to my love life was in response to that.
2. The fact that you think a couple of vague internet comments give you insight to my personality is laughable.
3. You didn’t “get me” to do anything (I always admit that computers are not one of my areas of expertise), but if it makes you feel better about yourself or more accomplished to think so, go ahead, sweetie. Nice to see you have nothing better to do than attempt to pick pointless fights with strangers via the internet. Your gender must be so proud to count you among them.
4. I don’t care about you or your opinions.
Yet, you keep replying–just like a trained animal waiting for her attention treat.
“You are indeed cute, but that doesn’t excuse your horrible personality”…well, according to the articles/comments I’ve seen on this site, my significance as a woman is vastly dependent on my appearance, so I’d say it does 😛
I live with 2 feminist, someone please come put me out of my misery.
You have my condolences, my friend.
Maybe have fun with it and get them riled up for the fun of it; why not?
Never go full misogynist(you may develop Lindy West Syndrome), and go easy on the miso soup too.