5 Habits All Successful Seducers Share

Whether you are looking to attract a long-term girlfriend or wife, or you are experimenting with shorter-term liaisons, learning the art of seduction is essential. Reams of content have been written on the topic, both on ROK and elsewhere: indeed, it’s possible to get lost in a tsunami of pick-up advice.

But while it can be useful to absorb successful people’s techniques, a shortcut is to observe their habits and adopt them yourself. To that end, here is a list of the top five habits I’ve observed in men who are great with women.

1. They take every opportunity 


Guys who are great with women recognize and take up every opportunity that is presented to them. In this way they are somewhat akin to entrepreneurs. They know that the market is in a constant state of flux, and that change is at the heart of opportunity. As such, like the speculators of pussy they are, they are never afraid to launch a takeover bid, regardless of the circumstances.

Game writers will often advise men that they should be approaching all the time. I would wholeheartedly endorse this. I would also add that however many opportunities you’re taking now, there are always more to be had. I, for example, will try to get my first approach of the day in in the morning while I’m traveling to my office on the subway. There are so many cute girls on their way to work in London (or any reasonably-sized commuter city) and yet guys won’t talk to them, rationalizing that it is too early, she’ll think I’m crazy or whatever. In actual fact, I’ve probably taken more phone numbers and set up more dates through morning approaches than at any other time.

So next time you are out and about and see an attractive girl, be sure to approach her whatever the time or the circumstances. It is only by being present and open to all prospects that you will truly optimize your game.

2. They notice and follow up on IOIs


While most game advice is centered on what the guy should do in order to attract the girl, the fact remains that there will be many times that girls will shoot you so-called ‘indicators of interest’, or IOIs, without you having done anything.

While I would never advise anyone to rely on these as a mainstay, I would counsel that you should always at least do your best to notice them, and to follow up with alacrity. Not only do direct IOIs frequently lead to sex, but also, if you fail to pursue a potentially-interested girl you may find yourself regretting it for a long time afterwards. Men, after all, are the more romantic gender. There are few more lasting self-inflicted wounds than the thought of that beautiful girl who smiled at you at the museum and who you just know you could have dated, had you had the courage to speak to her.

The successful seducer is always on the lookout for IOIs, therefore, and he’ll execute quickly when he gets them, even if it means deviating slightly from his routine. For example, a while back I was on a subway train when I got strong direct eye contact from an attractive, petite and very feminine brunette—just my type. Once you’ve been in the game a while you will learn to distinguish a solid IOI from casual interest, but the best way to describe it is as that “rabbit in the headlights” look that girls give when they are truly smitten.

Well, she was giving me that look and I knew I had to follow up. When she got of the train I went right after her, introduced myself on the platform, took her number and then left. A drink and then several awesome sex sessions ensued later. Had I not taken the time to go after her then we would never have connected.

Remember: always be willing to go after a sure thing, and never leave money on the table.

3. They stand out from the crowd


Every truly successful seducer I have ever known has found ways to differentiate himself and stand out from the crowd. This can manifest itself in many ways, but primarily I’m talking about standing out physically (in terms of what you wear) and standing out in terms of your personality.

While the old concept of “peacocking” is rightly maligned by both men and women these days, there can nevertheless be little argument with the fact that, all else being equal, the better dressed man will be more successful than his slacks-and-sweatshirt counterpart. A former colleague of mine who has slept with more women than anyone else I’ve ever met was particular about his clothes to the point of obsession.

I appreciate that this will immediately cause some people to question his masculinity (“what real man takes so much care over his clothes?”) but remember that narcissism is one of the three “dark triad” characteristics that are like catnip to women (along with Machiavellianism and psychopathy). Therefore, taking time to select a silk pocket square that contrasts dramatically with your blazer plus the right trousers and shoes will help your cause a lot—if you remember that your main aim is to stand out rather than blend in.

Your personality, too, should be larger than life. Don’t be obnoxious, but as a rule of thumb try to ensure that you are louder and have more to say than the other men in the group.

4. They are dominant

robb stark alpha

There can be no doubt that women are attracted to masculine men, and that means that to be a contender you need to be dominant. Now of course, the massive and blatantly obvious caveat here is that you should also be ultimately respectful and appreciate that no means no. Nevertheless, within these boundaries it will serve you well to ensure that your body language, your tone of voice and your general demeanor communicates dominance – both of the woman you are interacting with as well as any men in your vicinity.

The key thing here is to appear decisive and unwavering—even if secretly you aren’t. For example, after you’ve had a couple of drinks with a girl on a date, try getting up, taking her by the hand and simply leading her to a taxi. When she questions what you’re doing just say “we’re going back to my place to watch a movie.” Doing this will communicate that you have had similar success with women before and that you are not intimidated by her.

Now, in the back of your mind you may well be uncertain that she will acquiesce and that’s fine – just do the actions anyway and see what happens. She’s much more likely to want to go home with you if you demonstrate leadership and even if she doesn’t, she will still respect you more which will pay dividends the next time you meet.

5. They don’t apologize 


Highly successful seducers never apologize—or certainly not for minor social infractions anyway. The fact of the matter is you can’t make an omelette without breaking eggs. If you are the kind of guy who frequently approaches women while demonstrating leadership and a certain kind of cocky-funny humor then the chances are you’re going to offend someone every so often.

Now, I’m not recommending that you should be a dick—be classy and convivial in all your interactions. But the truth of the matter is that the real seducer always ruffles a few feathers in his quest for vaginal Valhalla. If someone gets offended then make a joke but don’t apologize. As long as have acted lawfully then you have nothing to be sorry for.

Remember, an apology is a submission to someone else’s frame—and that is never a good look.

Want to find out how to approach and seduce sexy girls? Buy my bestselling book, The Seven Laws of Seduction. For daily game advice connect with me on Twitter @Troy7Laws

Read More: Why You Don’t Deserve That Perfect 10

205 thoughts on “5 Habits All Successful Seducers Share”

  1. #6: Their Tinder game extends beyond the lame openers of “hey” or “what’s up”. Real life approaches of “hey baby” and a sense of desperation aren’t their thing either.

  2. A really good outline of advice there, I think. I have one nugget to add, which may help from a psychological perspective. I knew this really hot girl years ago. Stop-traffic hot. I’ve always tried to pick hot girls’ brains, whenever the chance availed itself.
    One day I got her to divulge to me what made her feel really bad about herself, way down deep. And she told me that if a guy saw through her bullshit and ignored her, or belittled her, or scoffed and walked away, it made her feel like total shit. And she would then have to find out why it had happened. She would then feel compelled to pursue that guy. The guy could be a hunchback, it didn’t matter what he looked like.
    That was probably the one single morsel of truth that a hot woman told me, that was worth its weight in gold. The vast majority of hot women base their entire sense of self-worth on the number of men who express sexual interest in them, at any given moment. They are masochistic at a level that is hard to comprehend. So a smart guy should add this one to his bag of tricks, and use it to exploit hot women mercilessly.
    I can’t tell you how many times I have banged hot women whom I’d just met, after scoffing and sneering at them with unbridled contempt, and pointing out just one of their innumerable flaws, all while demonstrating in no uncertain times that I saw right through them and did not give one shit about them because I knew exactly what they were like inside. That alone turns most hot women on at a very deep level, because most hot women are hopelessly twisted.

    1. Bob plus melanie, sitting in a tree.
      sdsadas, sdsadas, sdsadas, sdsadas, I..N..G!
      First comes love, then comes marriage
      then comes sdfhsdfhsdfh in a baby carriage!

        1. It’s true. It took me an hour to create that, and I did it over the internet from my own home.

        2. I pay my debts. Take the Cubs to win tonight, GOJ. Holy cow, Cubs win the World Series…

        3. I say it goes twelve innings, with an enormous lightning bolt in the final swing, breaking the hero’s treasured bat …
          …oh wait, that was The Natural. 😉
          But I agree. Cubs will win.

        4. I think it will be pretty close to just that scenario…Cubs will probably win by one measly run. That’s what the numbers are telling me. And Kyle Schwarber hasn’t homered yet, in dramatic fashion. And he’s as close to The Natural as you are going to see on this particular stage…

        5. I was trying to explain to my gf (who’s not American) just how enormous a win it would be for the Cubs tonight. There’s no other sports team in the history of the United States with such a championship drought. 108 years. If they win, we literally won’t see this again in our lifetimes.

        6. Melanie Gittens is trying to compel you to pick her brains up there. Or documenting a seizure. Hard to tell..

        7. Cubbies have an extremely good chance of going back over the next few years. Next year was deigned ‘the year’ prior to the season. Everything to this point is gravy.

        8. I get that entirely. But I’m an Ohioan, I want Cleveland to win. They’ve been so shat upon for almost a century that I really would like them to take a double sport victory.
          I mean, it’s not like the Browns are going to, you know, win anything.

        9. I was hoping Arietta vs. Kluber in Game 7 as I’m from the D/FW area and both grew up within 30 minutes of each other.

        10. They’ll win the opportunity to ruin yet another first round quarterback and maintain their complete oblivion.

    2. Yes, a time-tested piece of advice. Treat the gorgeous ones like they’re ugly. It requires powerful state control.
      Once you’ve had the gorgeous ones — I’ve laid a couple of professional models — you realize they’re not everything we make them out to be.

      1. Amen to that…give me a 7 with small tits, they’ll go the extra mile in the sack and elsewhere.

        1. I’ll take an 8 with an decent face and a great ass. Problem is, those types attract too much attention when they move in public.

        2. We’re pretty close in philosophy there it looks like. Those 9s and 10s aren’t worth the trouble, unless we are talking one-off fucks…IMHO.

        3. That’s not a problem. In fact, I kind of enjoy 8+. Slinky stinky little fuckers can only glance in envy.

        4. 8’s can be great relationship materials but you really need to call out on her bs and be very stoic.

        5. 8’s can be great relationship materials but you really need to call out on her bs and be very stoic

      2. The old saying “No matter how hot you think she is to you, there is some guy out there that thinks she is a bitch!”

    3. I was out with a friend last week and this girl he knew met up with us. After a few drinks, she started talking about her job, which is private sector mingled with public sector (dealing with children). I essentially told her that her job was pointless and that she would accomplish none of the feel good goals that inspired her to work there, and that the reform she worked towards within her field would be a massive, unnecessary tax burden. A few minutes later when my friend went to the restroom she asked if I wanted to stay at her place that night. They just fucking love punishment.

    4. I am a bit like that girl in terms of psychology. It’s gotten a lot better, but that’s pretty much the way I acted most of my life. Not necessarily in sexual terms, but in general.

    5. From experience, this is true. They just don’t expect a guy to cut through their facade like a hot knife.
      Smashing the hot girl shield. I used to do this in my teens out of habit without prior knowledge of any seduction or Red Pill knowledge. Was too much of an idiot to understand the IOI’s & then follow up though. Hindsight.

      1. Yes, hindsight is 20/20, isn’t it…I don’t always use this tactic (but when I do, etc.). But it’s amazing how quickly they will drop their panties whenever a guy uses it, so long as he makes it appear genuine. A couple of months ago I used it on a hot blonde who was holding court on the patio of this bar. Walked out, six guys sitting around her (of course, that’s never enough, they always want more guys at their feet), and she shot me “the look”. You know, that smile that says, “Aren’t I fucking hot.” I looked at her with abject contempt and about spit my beer out. Started shaking my head in disgust, walked away from her table, and turned my back on her completely. Sure enough, here she comes. We chit-chatted and she told me some bullshit about herself (forget what it was). And a minute later, I had completely eviscerated her after outing her regarding exactly what she was, which was not what she wanted the suckers at her table, to believe she was. She found this to be so compellingly fascinating. And after that, I called a taxi and the deal was closed. Ridiculous, but effective.

        1. I never understood the saying “hindsight is 20/20” 20/20 vision is “average” which would mean in hindsight your ability to understand what has happened is, at best, average. The best possible eyesight would be 20/1 so “hindsight is 20/1” would mean that looking back one’s vision is perfect. That is a bit unfair though as it is unlikely than anyone has ever had 20/1 vision. The best recorded human vision is 20/8 so “hindsight is 20/8” might make more sense in terms of saying that looking back ones sight is as perfect as human sight can be. However since the idiom is meant to connote absolute perfection one might say that Hindsight is 20/0 (a level of theoretical perfection which would be totally unattainable.)

        2. I have never understood, “It is what it is.” But, hindsight being 20/0, as you deftly pointed out, I was probably just thinking too hard about it…

        3. 20/20 vision means that a person reads a line of a certain size at 20 feet with the same clarity as an average person reads a line from 20 feet. It simply means “average vision. The best recorded vision would be 20/8 which would mean that the subject reads a line at 20 feet with the clarity that a person with average vision reads at 8 feet. This is, currently, the best recorded human vision. 20/1 vision is the best possible vision (though no one has ever tested as such) which would mean that at 20 feet the subject reads with the clarity of a person of average vision at 1 foot.

        4. I hate “it is what it is” and frequently call that one out too. It almost never is what it is.

        5. “not for nothing…”
          “at the end of the day…”
          “it is what it is”
          I cant abide by any of these, which unfortunately comprise 90% of the conversation in the construction world…

        6. It’s basically saying, “I can’t fucking understand this at all, so I’m going to sound Buddha-like and utter, ‘it is what it is’…” It’s as deep as a wading pool, is what it is.

        7. What is seems. What it could be. What it was. What it wants to be. What it was intended for.

        8. Perception vs. reality. Understanding the difference is the key to success in all endeavors…

        9. everything is interpretation. That is the point. Nothing ever is what it is. It is what I make of it. “It is what it is” is a sign of weakness and resignation to life as it is handed to you. But life is rarely handed to you nicely. It is a big steaming pile of gruel. “It is what it is” is that you say when you get that steaming pile of gruel and eat it instead of figure out the right moves to turn it into a steak

        10. True, in common parlance I often hear it with a note of resignation, that something can’t be any different.
          But some things cant.
          “it is was it is” is what saves you from BELIEVING that the gruel is a steak Gruel cannot be steak because, you guessed it – it is what it is. A=A and all that. One stone cannot be two stones. Granted a stone can be interpreted or perceived as a big stone, a small stone, a weapon, a friend, or whatever, but it will always BE one stone.

        11. I think that the point of the saying is that when you fuck up, you’re “not seeing things correctly”, which suggests bad vision, while hindsight provides you with “clear vision” of what you did wrong.

        12. Ideally, the set of twins that I have my eye on over at the bar.

        13. That one bothers me too. The statement can be said in a philosophical way, and in that case, it suggests the immutability of a situation that you cannot change.
          Unfortunately it has become another way of saying “I really don’t want to be bothered with the details, fuck it”.

        14. but 20/20 is only average vision. Hindsight ought to provide you with perfect vision which would be 20/1

        15. I don’t think it implies perfect. It just suggest that when you examine something after you’ve fucked up (were, basically, myopic or blind to something, or whatever) you see clearly what you did wrong.

        16. “clearly see” yes But 20/20 is mere average clarity. You would see something much more clearly if your hindsight was 20/15 (which is what mine is) and better yet if it was 20/10.

        17. No such thing as perfect vision as it can always be better. 20/0.1. 20/0.01. So we use 20/20 because it sounds “full”, as opposed to 20/8 which would require endless explanations, which defeats the purpose of an idiom.

        18. I am a bit of a stickler for accuracy in these things (and also a bit of a pain in the ass). I am going to start using “hindsight vision is 20/.01” as an idiom and the hell with sensus communis

        19. 20/10 guy here so I sympathize, but here’s my take.
          If your vision is significantly worse than 20/20 you need corrective aid because you can’t see clearly enough.
          If it is 20/20 or better, then you’re deemed to be seeing just damn fine. No need to don the spectacles in order to make sure you’re seeing well enough to recognize what’s standing right in front of you

        20. You’re taking a folk saying to task? Dude, this came from like, hill people. In that context, it makes perfect sense.

        21. 20/15 according to my flight physician records. Up close though, whole other story.

        22. The Look: An older Australian mate I used to hang out with referred to it as the ‘fat girl eyeing up a chocolate cake’ look 😀
          Yup, hindsight. Once I became aware of the concept, it’s astounding how I’ve observed this occurrence across different cultures & races of women. I’m no ultra alpha but it’s definitely a nice internal confidence boost when I get the ‘eye’ from a looker.
          I’ve noticed myself getting jaded over time though as I’ve observed a lot of them aren’t particularly interesting after they open their mouths. Some exceptions aside. As you noted above, I think the ‘not giving a fuck’ vibe from our side unfortunately makes it easier to hook them.

      1. This is developing into a classic Battle of the Bobs, I must say.

    6. I’m not trying to be a dick, but I’m a little surprised you needed to pick a girl’s brain to figure that out.

    7. Ive seen results on this, but some times I see girls freak out when you tell them negative shit about their life, you can see in their eyes that she would burn you alive if she had some gasoline arround. I think, the trick, is in telling this “life negs” with humour, and wait for the best response, still, there always be some shit-crazy girls that will spit in you face if you dont support them in their life decissions, dont know how you feel about this…

      1. It depends on the girl. If I size the girl up as being the type to run this trick on, I will run it. Different women call for different tactics. I don’t approach women, typically, and I never chase them or show overt interest. I look for indications of interest from them, most of the time. After a guy gets that, it really shouldn’t take a lot of effort to close the deal.

      2. Its always best to say things with a grin, so she isn’t even sure that you are serious. And best to mix in some good for that push pull effect. If she does get mad..”I was only kidding, why are you so sensitive(another neg).” You have to adjust how heavy your negs are though to match the ego.

    8. Hey Bob, Bob is a bitch for whining about how many Bobs there are, isn’t he Bob?

      1. When the red-red robin comes bob-bob-bobbin’ along…along
        There’ll be no more sobbin’ when he starts throbbin’ his old sweet song…

    9. Narcissists can be created by excessive praise or excessive criticism. Obviously hot women get way too much praise-which makes them exceedingly sensitive to any criticism. This is where the neg is born, and why the hotter the woman the more its essential to take her down a peg.

      1. Your first statement is dead on.
        But about negs and “hotter” women, perhaps simply making them subtlety aware of the abundance (w/ convincing proof, she doesn’t care about a dogcatcher) — if you’ve been close or intimate with 9s/10s, then you know a good % of them already understand “neg game.” I’ve seen them volley and mirror common tactics right back at PUAs with alacrity. Many beautiful women have serious PUA radar and also have a natural-born game of their own, and dudes can really get vaporized by their *own* neg game at that level, especially among women with above-average IQs. I gotta give it to some 9s and 10s, they have this “polite game” thing they’ll do by just politely remaining unlocked and sending a guy out the door, to the point where he even hardly knew what hit him. Narcissist neg guys go down like that. I learned a little thing early and life’s been good — radiate power and abundance, keep negs in the back near “plan C or D” level. They get “last resort” status for times that call for extreme measures, such as defending one’s own honor against random, broken, disrespectful bitches.

        1. Ive had a different experience..generally the hotter the woman the more she needs to hear that she isnt quite up to your standards. And of course as you say like in sales..so much is what you do before the sale.

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  3. They also go where they’ll be most successful and avoid where they’ll almost certainly fail. A Mercedes may be a great and desirable car, but it’s downright hard to sell them in the slums.
    Nightclubs, in particular, are places the successful seducers generally avoid. The majority of women at clubs are either there with a boyfriend (never a great pickup option), surrounded by orbiters (making it too easy to be associated with that particular brand of failure), or downright dangerous women. Add to that the unnecessarily high covers and cost of drinks, and it’s just not a practical location for the successful seducer.
    Instead, they’ll tend to ply daygame, go to events (meetups, festivals, etc.), or hit up bars and the like where the environment and atmosphere are conducive to their particular style of game.

    1. That article was rough. You know what all these people who hate “toxic masculinity” have in common? They are physically inferior and were always picked last on the playground. They didn’t play sports, not because they didn’t want to, but because they weren’t good enough. And the women railing against “toxic masculinity” are just angry because masculine men don’t want to fuck them. They teem with jealousy every time they see a well built athlete or a successful entrepreneur because they never have, nor ever will, attain that level of success.

      1. The problem is that those guys who buy into it are insecure dweebs (like myself in that time) who just want some validation. But while they may think they’re being done a favor by being classified ‘victims of patriarchy’ as well, it only makes life worse for them. Its the good old kind of ‘help’ that gets you deeper into shit.

        1. I am glad I never bought into that too deeply. While I was ill-informed, I still found the moralizers irritating for a reason I couldn’t pin down, and I couldn’t bring myself to be one of them.
          Then I learned about the real stats (pussy pass, pay-gap in part-time work, etc), and everything came into focus. I realized the people I knew who bought into that nonsense were weak and effeminate men who were afraid to live up to their own potentials (because it takes hard work and pain), and the women who bought into it were just disgusting inside (and, often enough, outside).

        2. I’ve run across some guys who bought in, and they’re miserable. They try and try to rationalize that way of thinking, but reality keeps smacking them in the face. I try to help out where I can, but most of them are hostile towards reality.

        3. Eckhart Tolle says it’s not really the person who’s hostile, but the ego.
          For example, let’s say a boy grows up with a mother who beats him every time he acts like a man and tells him ‘Men are evil’.
          Now, we may make some complicated assumptions about how this influences him, but the most straightforward explanation is: He simply adapts what she said and she (his oppressor) becomes his ego, hence his ego becomes his new oppressor and even if he (at the level of his soul (?) is still a man, his ego will attack his own masculinity and that of other men.

        4. I think that it’s not so much that those men don’t want to face the pain, but rather, they have been shamed for feeling that pain. Imagine a mother who tells the boy to be ‘nice’ when he’s masculine. Then the boy is sad. Then the mother tells him he should suck it up and not be sad. So he learns pain is ‘wrong’ and never learns to love it.

        5. This sounds an awful lot like Norman Bates from Psycho. If you’ve never seen it, he had an oppressive mother (that he killed years prior) who became a part of his identity. He would dress up like her and murder guests staying at his hotel.

        6. Must say I was never particularly shocked by them (emotionally disconnected I guess), but I could appreciate the thought that went into them.

        7. Here’s a disturbing movie. “Wake in Fright” (1971). Be sure to stick around for the kangaroo-slaughter scene. You can watch it for free right here –

        8. Brother, I don’t know the reason, but I am very very very hard to shock. As for fictional movies, they practically never shock me, because I know it’s bullshit.

        9. Neither was I, but that was mainly due to having seen plenty of horror/suspense movies with tons of gore before watching those. On a psychological level, though, his movies touched on things that no one else dared to go near at that time.

        10. I’m the same way, usually. Watch the kangaroo slaughter scene, if nothing else. That’s worth the price of admission (zero dollars)…

        11. Yeah, had I been born back then … maybe.
          Hah. There is a particular form of movies that does disturb me though … it’s that Asian shit. Like ‘The Ring’ or ‘The Grudge’.

        12. Ha, I was kinda exaggerating, I realize. I’m actually easy to shock. A few hard shit tests from some girl and I’m in a bad place. Real life has plenty of stuff that makes me lose my mind … especially my dreams as of recent.
          But movies … meh.

        13. Those ones creep me out as well. I just made my girlfriend watch the Grudge for the first time the other night. She was pissed because it gave her nightmares. She did get me back though by making that weird throaty noise while I was half asleep. Made me jump backward.

        14. Perhaps this is the cause, but I often enough see fear in their eyes when they look at me. I was one of them, so far as they cared to know, but now I’m with a stunning girl, self-published, working diligently in an engineering field, lifting weights, and absolutely unapologetic.
          If I had to describe the vibe, it would be a combination of fear (of me, because I am better), shame (because they know in their hearts they could be better), and confusion (because I’m doing it all wrong, but I’m succeeding). What they think is reality does not match reality, and they are unable to grasp that.
          The indoctrination is real and damaging. But it can be conquered.

        15. Of course there is fear … but fear of what? Of the current situation alone? Or fear from the past projected onto the current situation? Fear instilled by the parents?

        16. And not only parents mind you. School and stuff too. Social pressure. Is it just fear of pain in the current confrontation? Or fear of being shamed for being confrontational or something? For me, there is a very big part of fear of shame/guilt.

      1. You sound upset and in need of reeducation. Perhaps you’d benefit from discussing issues like gender fluidity.

        1. the only gender fluidity I like is when I am deep dicking some broad and she squirts

  4. There are few more lasting self-inflicted wounds than the thought of that beautiful girl who smiled at you at the museum and who you just know you could have dated, had you had the courage to speak to her.
    this, this, a thousand time this.

  5. In terms of the early voting results, black turnout is down 16%, white turnout is up 15%, and the New York Times, that bastion of leftist philosophy and Liberal Democrat blather, is the outfit that is reporting this very interesting news, which even they concede makes things look really grim for Hillary Clinton. Hail President Trump…

  6. “They notice and follow up on IOIs”
    I think this advice should be taken with a grain of salt. Many articles focus on this ‘she wants you to talk to her’.
    Fuck what she wants. You talk to her because you want to, not because you mindread her and think that she wants you so hard. That mindset gives you all kinds of headaches as in having cognitive dissonance over whether she REALLY wants it.

    1. A good seducer knows how to play the game. Some women respond well to immediate and direct dominance, while some require that pulsing inner strength that shows itself in subtle ways. Both of these can be consistent in one man, but when it’s not consistent the seducer will seek out those who respond well to his particular element.
      A pussy (that is, a submissive and weaker-willed man) can seduce, but it’s a crap shoot. Odds are good he’ll never get the quality of girl he really desires.

      1. Well, are we talking about someone who lives confidently and finds his niche with inner strength or are we talking about people who somehow manage to pull ass while being kinda fucked up?
        Look at Mystery in that PUA book. He plays clever games, but is kind of a wreck really. As is the author of that book.

        1. I read Mystery’s work as well as Neil Strauss’s “The Game”. Your read pretty much matches my own.
          Surely Mystery and his ilk must have had some inner strength to get out there every evening with those outrageous gimmicks, but they were definitely fucked up people. So, while they were apparently decent seducers, they lacked some of the masculinity we seek to cultivate here.
          ‘Tis better by far to live confidently and find your niche. Instead of peacocking and playing the dancing monkey, it seems preferable to become the kind of man women want to be with (whether or not you’re actively seeking them – you do it for you, not for them).

    2. Well no, all of any given theory never applies to all, in anything in life.
      In real life though, dominance (and confidence), the real stuff not the “asshole game” faking it stuff, is highly valued by women.
      Pretty young bartender asks me what I want (my order). I tell her:
      “Baby girl, I want a Scotch on the rocks right now, and then every ten minutes I want you to come to the back patio with another Scotch for me, and when you get some spare time, I want you to go out to the parking lot and wipe down my motorcycle. Use a soft cloth.”
      She gets all flirty, smiles, winks and says in a semi-mocking tone “Yes master”
      My reply: “See, I like how you adopted the correct role so quickly. You might just earn a tip” *wink*
      She winks back and is beaming like a little kid.
      Ten minutes later, guess who shows up on the patio with a Scotch in her hands, giving me a semi-evil Cheshire grin?

      1. Yup. It’s kinda intuitive, when it comes down to it. Whenever I did that, whether in real life or online, that is about the response I get (aside from some weirdo girls). But I usually feel too ashamed and afraid to do it.

        1. There’s a thin line between confidence and being a dik.
          What GOJ proposes takes a masterful delivery.

        2. You’ve got to sell with conviction, whatever you use as your game tactic of choice. It’s all about conviction…

        3. There is a very particular “cat who just ate the canary” smile that goes along with saying things like that that simply cannot be faked and makes all the difference.

        4. yes. you’ll find yourself looking down the business-end of a can of mace if that smile starts to violate the boundary between “cute” and “child molester”
          Again – a subtly that takes practice.
          I can’t smile so I rely solely on muzzle velocity; I gotta keep the bullshit flowing full bore to keep ’em giggly.

        5. You bet your bippy it does. A certain head tilt, absolute eye contact while breaking into that slow easy smile and not flinching even a little bit. Even the slightest incongruity blows the effect and you lose the game.

        6. Once you decide to execute you go in both feet first, or you don’t go at all.
          The shit I can get by saying to women is amazing. And 8 times out of 10 they do exactly what I tell them to do, with a smile on their face. Lots of my buddies, these are bikers mind you, think that I’ve got some kind of hypno-power on women, and I have this rather funny reputation of being the “lady killer” that you probably don’t want to introduce your sister or girlfriend to, heh.

        7. If I have ever seen anyone fake that look they have been so good that I didn’t notice they were faking. I have a way of saying things with the right head tilt and smile that you couldn’t believe the shit I get away with. I was at dinner with a doctor who I got to admit that Tuskegee was a good thing. If I can talk a young and idealistic doctor into Tuskegee being a good thing you bet YOUR bippy that I can talk her clothes off of her.
          One thing about this…I have always been able to do it all my life…as far back as I can remember, with 1st grade teachers….but only, only, only when I am in a good mood. When I am in a shit mood I stay home and listen to or play some music and drink scotch. I never go out.

        8. Try younger women who have not had kids, don’t work as serving wenches in biker bars and you won’t need to go in both feet first. You will barely be able to fist!

      2. “I want you to go out to the parking lot and wipe down my motorcycle.”
        We have a visual:

        1. Pretty close in this case. This particular girl looks very similar to Sloan from “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off”.
          We have a little banter thing going on now, and her normal response to my teasing has become:
          “Are you trying to fuck with me?” or “Are you fucking with me?”
          My answer of course is “Well yeah, eventually, if you get lucky”
          According to some of my buddies, word is that I am *so* on her radar now, and she asks about me a lot. Heh.

  7. #2 and #4 are a little wrong.
    #2 Relying on IOIs is an option for some of us. If you look really good — be tall, dress well, move slowly with purpose — you’ll get quite a few of them. Last weekend at a big social event, I ignored a boatload of IOIs from a pair of Eastern European brunette smokeshows. (I was there with my girlfriend’s social group and would’ve been ratted out instantly.) Each one caught my eye two to three times. Still regretting that. Damn.
    #4 We’ve all known that sneaky fucker who quietly gets laid like tile behind everybody’s backs. He dominates and seduces women as an individual. Those sneaky fuckers don’t need to dominate men.

    1. There’s a beautiful Weather-girl who works on the East Coast nowadays. Talk about regret.

  8. Re: Point number 1. You should act immediately. I am too guilty of hesitating. The other day I was at a large meeting with two young hot chicks. I was sitting there thinking about which of the two I would approach at the end of the meeting. First one, then the other, got up to leave early. Should have engaged the closest one to me before the meeting started. A bird in the hand is worth.. a nest full of lizards in the bush.

    1. We are all guilty of that at one point or another. Keep waiting until the perfect moment which never comes.

        1. This particular clip is genius. Joe Montegna is with that woman who is a psychiatrist. He is a known thief and con artist. So he is explaining the short con to her, but then doesn’t take the guys money. Why? What would it matter. At this point in the film she already knows he is a thief. See, while he is explaining the short con and using our loveable marine as an example, he isn’t the intended target. The intended target is the psychiatrist. The short con is just a part of the long con in the confidence game he is playing on the shrink who is analyzing him.
          Christ, remember when movies had some thought in them?

        2. I vaguely remember those days. I’m going to check this movie out; I like films that explore this theme. A couple other good films involving confidence scams are “The Grifters” (1990), and “The Last Seduction” (1994), in case anybody is looking for something worth watching…

        3. The film was directed by David Mamet, the sine qua non of con movie directors. House of Games is one of his earlier efforts (1987.)
          The list of Mamet greats is impressive and all are worth putting in your queue:
          Glengarry Glen Ross
          American Buffalo (it’s about a rare nickel, not the animal)
          The Spanish Prisoner
          Wag the Dog

        4. Might also check out …
          The Brothers Bloom (a bit silly in parts, and Adrian Brody may be a little too beta for comfort)
          Nine Queens
          This is an Argentinian movie revolving around a counterfeit sheet of rare stamps. It’s insanely complicated and you practically have to see it at least twice to get what’s going on, but it all makes complete sense. Remade in the U.S. as “Criminal,” and the remake is also worth a look. (Beware, the Wiki synopsis is full of spoilers.)

        5. And now all the delusional white trash degenerates can beat off to this cuck porn instead

        6. “putting in your queue” just isn’t right if you speak enough french not to say “viola” when you are explaining how something is accomplished

  9. Re #5
    “Never apologize, it’s a sign of weakness”
    John Wayne’s character in ‘She Wore A Yellow Ribbon’

    1. Two other John Wayne movies every man has to see….McClintock and The Quiet Man
      If he lived today, we would consider him Red Pill. That was just common knowledge back then.

  10. “The successful seducer is always on the lookout for IOIs, therefore, and he’ll execute quickly when he gets them”
    Bear in mind that a lot of women enjoy giving IOI’s simply to bait a simp into going over to her and giving her attention – with the intent of either telling him to fuck off (for the fun of it) or simply to waste his time.
    Remember gentlemen: attention is currency to a female.

  11. You need to be seriously obsessed with women if you approach them all the time, just to get rejected in every case. Also, I live in a country where daygame is non-existant unless you meet a freshly arrived foreign girl or tourist. I know in America you can approach women in the supermarket, that would make you look like a dork over here.
    Have you heard about Andrew Anglin? He said that every man who brags about often getting laid with very attractive women is lying.

  12. I feel like this advice is for unattractive or average looking guys. When you’re good looking your number one priority must be questioning girls to make sure they’re not fucking crazy(easier said than done), everything else takes care of its own.

      1. Not really.. I don’t know what Roosh describes as “acting like a clown” but I assure you I have never done it, if anything it’s women that acted like buffoons when In conversation.
        All you need is good looks and a calm demeanor, with a deep voice and fluent speech; and poof she will do all the talking trying to impress you and look at you with puppy eyes the whole time. The challenge is finding out how crazy she is, because they’re always on their best behavior when you first meet. I think the best quality a good seducer can have is sorting out the jealous and crazy ones.

  13. You must stand out….by suiting up with a pocket square or wearing a black leather jacket like every guy in the world running game.

  14. I found this site today and I’ve read most of the articles/agree with almost all of the content. However, I am a female and I don’t see any other females on here. Reasonably so, of course, it is returnofkings.com and not returnofkingsandqueensshouldbeincludedtoo.gov. I’m wondering if anyone here knows where I could find a female equivalent of this site or at least a small female following, if one exists. I would like to speak to other women with similar viewpoints but any Internet searches that I’ve done have been extremely disappointing.

    1. That is awesome that you’re seeking similar thinking women. I have to say that most of the woman that I am around day to day would never come to this website. The only one that would, I married her. How about if you start your own?

        1. Says the attention whore trolling for alpha D on a men’s site because she thinks her face pic is cute

      1. Thank you, Jim! Although it looks to be more oriented towards single women, I’m sure it will still be a great step in the right direction. 😊

        1. my pleasure, I was just guessing on your demographic from the picture. My wife and I will read from “Eternal Marriage Student Manual (Religion 234 and 235)” a page or so every night. Not to push religion on you, but I think the lack of religion is a big reason our society is in the mess it is.

        2. I’d have to agree with you on that. Although I want raised under any particular religion and am not quite sure what to call myself yet, I can see in (most) people that are religious that it provides a moral compass that a lot of others don’t have. I’m assuming there’s a sense of community from going to church, which I don’t see much of nowadays. Living in a small town is just the same as living in a big city. 😑
          One of these days I’ll find the right religion/group for myself, hopefully.

        3. I grew up in an irreligious home, through high school, my dating life was disappointing. I was still hoping for the traditional American Dream, but got burned more than once. During my first years of college, I had an experience that made me seriously question the existence of God. I picked up the Bible and read it on occasion. I asked girls out that I thought were appealing. 4 girls in a row, they were Mormon. That is in a community where 1/10 or so is. I came to realize that there was a pattern here. I attended church with a friend of mine for awhile. It was a little awkward at first, but it all fell into place and made sense to me in time. That is when I was 23. Since then, I went on to serve 2 years in Ireland, married and now have 6 kids. Life is good. I am still rough around the edges and feel like a hypocrite sometimes, but we all are. The trick is to keep at it.

        4. Well you sound happy so that’s all that matters! How was Ireland? I’ve often thought about moving there later in life.

        5. Not at all like it is portrayed, but then I was knocking on doors in suburbia. Like everywhere you go, there are good and bad. Summers are beautiful, winter is 6 months of cold, blowing rain. Socialism has made a mess of the country, the entitled class is more than half the people, and morality is in the toilet. You go into a Catholic church, and it is like a museum. I enjoyed the experience, especially working with people, and seeing them turn their lives around. However, there is no way I would live there.

        6. That’s a shame. The majority of my family is from Dublin. One of these days I’ll go see if for myself.

        7. I would encourage you to get a plane ticket, but make it a two-way. There are lots of beautiful tourist sites, and a decent night life in Dublin (I never saw it as a missionary). I have some family from there, but that was like 6 or 7 generations ago.

        8. I definitely will in the next few years. There’s a lot I’ve got to get done on the home front first. Hopefully I’ll have my farm up and running well by 2025.

        9. Ive been telling myself that for 15 years now. I was even in the process of flying out this girl I taught over there. But then I met my future wife.

  15. I’ve never had any problems getting any play, I would concur with the author about this advise.
    Once bit that stood out to me was about speaking loudly. In social situation, I make my voice BOOM and many people have told me that they were able to tell where the party was if they followed the direction of my voice.
    You don’t want to shout, but you want to speak clearly and with authority.
    People,in general, are TERRIFIED of speaking in public or having everyone look and listen to them and will notice someone that is able to do so effectively.

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