Let me start by declaring, one of the most exciting and dynamic discussions in the progression of day game is the utility of direct versus indirect approach styles. More or less it is the difference between you openly asserting your sexuo-romantic desires at the beginning or doing so at a later time.
Indirect allows for more passive or stress-free socialization because it does not foist a sudden ultimatum upon the ladyfriend (i.e. either reciprocate the sexual intentionality or reject it), although at the same time it leaves you more exposed to social stagnation. In opposition, direct affords you the opportunity to foster an attractively confident portrait of yourself in the woman’s mind, but can also leave you open to the unfavorable situation of coming off aggressively arrogant, and thus losing in the short term what you may have otherwise acquired.
To properly describe the optimal day game ‘technique,’ we must make a finer distinction about the way direct/indirect approaches appear when practiced in everyday life. Therefore, we must conceptually separate, and individually evaluate, the two primary forms of human communication i.e. verbal language vs. body language, and specifically in relation to their direct and indirect manifestations in the world at large.
When dealing with the intricacy of these types of human interactions, it is imperative that we keep in mind the social context in which they occur. And for day game in casual settings such as class, or the coffee shop, or just on the plain old side-walk, it is necessary to tailor the specifics of one’s game to complement the circumstance at hand.
It breaks down like this. If your game is lacking or “unidimensional” (i.e all direct or all indirect), you are very likely to get caught losing chicks by falling into one of two pussy-repelling extremes, Wussiness or Douchebaggery. On the whole, if the girl thinks you are either weak (physically, fiscally, or socially) or conversely an unpleasantly rude or crude person to talk to, you probably ain’t getting laid. So, the question is how do we synthesize a softer (but at the same time) commanding strategy to the proverbial cold approach, which can be confidently applied, in full sun, during a majority of routine interactions?
After a very great deal of thought and an even greater amount of in the field, placebo controlled, single-blind studies spread among the 25,000 women age 17-25 who inhabit my university, I have come to the see quite clearly that employing a bipartisan policy of direct body language coupled with indirect verbal language provides the world’s most effective day game tactic. Now, you may ask why I am so confident in this particular means of attack, well, the logic goes like this…
Direct Body Language
Let me begin with the “undertones” you use to communicate, the subtle yet powerful physical actions and attributes you use to tell a women you’re ready, able, and interested. This is the bedrock of your game and therefore extremely important because it can either solidify the smooth and sultry move you just made, or it can fidget and sweat you into a lake that promptly downs all change of vaginal acquisition.
Therefore the first thing to keep in mind can be best captured from a Samuel L. Jackson line in the ending scene of Pulp Fiction, “…and when you do it, you do it cool.” Staying loose and relaxed is the starting point for all well composed communication. It shows that you are someone who is well within his comfort zone beginning, and being in conversation with new and attractive women. Without this chill you will soon be fried, but being calm, cool, and collected is not the end of the story if what you’re really seeking is maximum results.
I buy the saying, ‘add a little edge’. That is, besides standing tall, with good posture, smiling comfortably, making strong and confident eye contact, and not appearing overly excited, you should to take it one step further. That little step my friends, is the touch barrier.
It has been addressed by many before me and is a very effective means for directly confirming your physical intentions without saying a word. Of course, above all, be tactful. You need the act to communicate safety, security, and masculinity, not sleaziness (not yet anyway). Remember that first touch should be strong but mostly platonic in nature. Depending on the environment even a solid handshake is better than no touch at all. If you are overly weak or distinctly aggressive you will very likely lose the white-tail.
In short, you need to routinely hold a strong physical presence, you need to literally put yourself out there with a solid foundation of confidence and hold your ground with pride and determination, this is the first half of building yourself an optimal day game.
Indirect Verbal Language
Once again, as with game in general, and with day game in particular, it is absolutely essential to keep in mind the kind of environment in which you are operating. Let me paint the scene. You’ve out for a quick lunch at a local coffee and sandwich shop eating a BLT with delicious San Francisco sourdough, creamy Mayo, crisp lettuce, and cuts of hickory smoked bacon so thick they might as well be mini pork-chops, when you notice a knock-out. I mean a goddamn knock-out. Like, damn.
Now, sadly, your first impulse may be to launch an all out social assault on her, complete with a few overzealous comments about how astoundingly beautiful she is, how you’ve never seen anyone like her before, and how you would be beyond honored to waste your hard earned money paying for her nightly booze induced debauchery. Or, you may enter the road from the other ditch. That is, sadly, your first impulse is more or less ‘shut down’, start sweating, and never get your ass up out of that seat in the first place. It does not take a prodigy of social navigation to see that both of these extremes leave you in a piss poor position to take her out.
Here is where indirect verbal language really shines. Here is where the middle way (as the Buddha would say) can reach its full potential. Now what exactly do I mean by indirect language? I mean this, probably initiating, and mostly leading, a light but interesting conversation concerning almost any topic besides your physical desire for the women at hand. Simple as that. This conversation could center around the building you’re in, the food you had, the happenings of the town, local sports teams or artists, interesting hobbies and social activities, or a hodgepodge mix of all of the above.
This last part is hard, but all you have to do is try. It’s like my old man used to say “Look where you wanna go.” It’s the same with women as with driving, as with life in general. Just take her for the ride.
Read More: Indirect Vs. Direct Game: Which Is Really Better When You Approach A Beautiful Girl?
92 thoughts on “What Happens When You Combine The Best Parts Of Direct And Indirect Day Game”
Nonverbal communication: 60% to 70% of your message.
Verbal communication: 30% to 40% of your message.
Lesson: When standing, lengthen spine, hold shoulders back, show open body language by occasionally showing the inside of one arm. Keep hands loosely at sides. Sew your pants pockets shut if you can’t resist jamming them in there. Practice seductive eye contact.
All this can be be learned.
about pockets you are right. The one hand half in leaning look can work if you pull it off right, but having your hands in your pockets is basically holding up a “Do Not Fuck” sign
When breaking down the ‘look cool and casual’ mechanics, what to do with one’s hands was always the most challenging part. I almost took up smoking just to give them something to do other than tapping, picking, pocketing….
I just continually masturbate.
And the girl that maintains eye-contact while you’re at it in public – THERE’s your keeper!
yourself, or her?
That what long pockets are for, homie!
Eye contact is a must, but the real keeper is the one who puts her hands in too…
I have 2 hands ya know.
Talking a bit with your hands works out for something to do. You don’t have to go full Eye-talian ethnic slur, but using them casually while you banter works out pretty good for me. I also tend to lean back on bars with my hands draped out on both sides, wrists resting on the edge of the bar. Another decent move is to throw that arm over her head with the lean on the wall thing that guys used to do that half-“traps” her while you talk. They love that shit.
All good stuff. That ‘lean in’ move is not for amateurs.
Being a partial eye-tie from metro NY, I am rendered mute if I cant use my hands at least partially!
But using your hands and arms a little when you’re talking is good – it subtly establishes a little spatial dominance around you.
The “lean in” does require some initial banter and clear IOI’s before you try it, you can’t just up and do it to some stranger chick that you’ve just encountered on the subway or something.
And god help you if you’re so drunk you miss the wall you were aiming to lean on……
This is where you study and learn from cats. Make any physical fuck up into “Why yes, I did in fact mean to do that”. Do it with the same level of haughtiness that a cat does it and it just may work!
Mr. Bean Game.
My wife does that, her brother is deaf, so whenever she is pissed at something, she starts flashing all these rudimentary gang (ASL) signs.
lol, not quite what I was getting at.
must be hilarious when you refer to them as “gang signs” to her!!!
I think it pays to watch some effective speakers and how they move their hands.
A lot can be learned by watching. Go out one day or night specifically for the purpose of watching people interact. Watch the body language of various guys and girls, see what seems to work and what doesn’t. It’s often easier to see a guy present himself well and emulate it rather than read a description of how you should do it.
I think it pays to keep your elbows bent, so long as you are not allowing your arms to dangle or sit in your pockets, they will be naturally be doing something while you are talking. It just shows more energy and engagement.
I tend to use my hands when I talk, but I am very conscious to not gesture with them in a feminine way. If you watch some of these cucked nu-male types using their hands while in a conversation, they have this slack-wristed womanly thing going on that just screams virgin, and women immediately notice shit like that.
Indeed. I think that it pays loads, in general, for everything, to people watch with regard to social interactions. Way too many action-only types, who would benefit, imho, from taking a day to sit in the local coffee shop or bar or public park and just….watch.
Whether or not you like Stephen Colbert, pay attention to his hands and gestures. Women like long hands in fluid, masculine expression. It’s a bit like a peacock tail.
No shit, I can’t tell you how many women have told me that male hands are one of their biggest turn ons, if you play your cards right, those same hands will eventually be firmly pulling her hips into your cock… and that is ultimately what she wants.
Everyone makes fun of me because I go for my weekly manicure and pedicure but women will check your hands out and large, strong and well manicured hands matter.
Bingo. You could be a goddamn Calvin Klein underwear model, but if a woman looks down and notices you are rocking long fingernails, all she is thinking is “do I really want those things scraping the inner wall of my vagina later tonight? Hard Pass.”
Bad hygiene is the #1 fail for most men.
+1 on hands. Just last night I hooked up with a taller woman; I’m 5′ 10″ she was 6’+ and the MOMENT she felt my hands on her bare waist it was a done deal. Her entire body reacted and she melted.
My first time with a taller girl; kinda weird but cool.
Does ROK have an article in pulling in taller women? I might be able to contribute a little.
Lol knee, you seem pretty style-aware. I’d like your opinion; my daughter’s graduation dinner is at a local, upscale-ish boating club, she is receiving several scholarships. Charcoal suit or Blazer and slacks?
Good question. For any occasion that you weren’t directly involved with, some party you were just invited to, at a boat club I’d say blazer and slacks. However; since your daughter is graduating and being honored I’d say notch up to the suit.
I second the knee… definitely suit up for that.
Much appreciated. Follow up; what are your thoughts on bow ties, self-tied of course
I preface this by saying that this is my opinion and by no means a fashion rule….for me the bow tie can only be worn with tuxedo or with formal white dinner jacket (and yes, of course self tied). There are more people out there that would disagree with me than agree with me, but unless I am in dinner jacket or tux I won’t wear a bow tie. I feel it looks contrived.
An OT funny story about this. I was in a department store and saw a white dinner jacket some years ago. It was just amazing. I bought it and a black pair of pants and a shirt. I was so excited. A few weeks later I decided to go out to a place here in NYC that is truly old world new York where a dinner jacket would be appropriate. I put on my outfit, tied my bow tie and put my red pocket square in. I felt so freaking james bond I could have lit up the whole world. My stride was cool and I was so freaking happy.
Anyway, I get to the place and I walk in with this super manly Sean Connery confidence and I get to the bar and order a martini when I realize that the entire staff, bartenders, waiters, everyone…are wearing white dinner jackets and black bow ties.
The crushing realization fell on me like a pile of bricks and hit its absolute apex when, realizing I was dressed like the staff, someone asked me for their check! Infuriated at my crushing defeat I left and went up to the Carlyle hotel as I know that in Bemelman’s the staff wears red jackets. It was such a great moment. I sat in the corner at a small table drinking martini after martini in a white dinner jacket and bow tie looking like Bogart waiting for Ingrid Bergman to walk in and little did anyone realize that the troubles I was drinking away had to do entirely with a fashion / bar faux pas.
Thanks for taking the time to respond.
Wear good quality mitts that match your scarf in cold weather. Women like that attention to detail plus your hands are not going into your pockets.
and never cross arms.
Moreover for fuck sake never walk WHILE crossing arms. Only insecure people, women and fags do that !!!
edit, and instead of putting hands in pockets while standing, adopt a cow boy stance : each hand resting near pockets but only thumbs in the pocket. spread the legs a bit and feet firmly in the ground : seems cool, masculine and authoritative posture. Bitches will notice it directly.
or legs! if you’re sitting, do NOT cross your legs. or while standing for that matter. I had to consciously overcome this faggotry…
it depends, bem.
Crossing legs like women do, of course, never do it.
But, resting one ankle on the opposite knee, leaning back and spreading arms (like if you wrap the shoulders of two girls, one on each side of you) around the (i dunno the word) “neck resting zone of your chair but far apart your body” conveys message of power and dominance. That is cool and could be used, as long as you have the adequate big chair to do that
quite an example
I’ll buy that.
Why do all the pictures in this article look like scenes from The Sims?
That guy in the last photo…gimme a break…
That guys in the last photo…
The guy in that last photo…he has absolutely no shot and he knows it…
That poor sap in that last photo…
Chick on left seems decently fuckable, but the chick on the right is just too scrawny and has absolutely no tits that I can see.
And she needs a shave….
Hey, Bem. Finally read who your pic is. I sort of thought it was you for a while. I liiked his stuff up. Carlin’s great. I’d never seen a set of his before. Thanks for that.
Yup, must be a hormone imbalance, plus that pixie cut is a definite negative.
ha! no…If I put my mug in there I’d get banned for life!
Yes, Carlin was a true master and I am hardly worthy enough to purloin his likeness…
I know its a re-run, but….
Heh…oh man that was good…
Looks like he gave up his stool like a cuck.
Wouldn’t surprise me if real life situations like that see that occur.
I’d laugh, but it’s too close to home. Girls making ‘friends’ only pisses me off now. Selfish bitches, getting only their needs met. Forget all those Tester-types. Thank God for ROK, and Red-Pill Neomasculinism. I was dead and I didn’t even know it. It was rationalist’s half-life purgatory. You know what’s funny, though? Learning the truth changed little empirically. It’s like being a prospector who found out there’s little gold in this valley, who bought a sluice machine thinking there were untapped veins; there’re almost no good women here, and, yeah, now I know why. Thing is, now that I have a dependable skill-set, I’m more wasted than ever on this lonesome place. Here’s a confession, men. I’m from Portland, Oregon, USA: Heart of Darkness. Gotta admit, I’m thankful for the Kings, and the revelations from game, but Oregon is bleak, men. Very bleak, indeed. This stuff’s hauntingly accurate. Uncle Bob, I taught a young man your money-flicking concepts, by the way. Never occurred to him that it’s ‘status at play.’ He liked that. The only upside here is that as a non-hipster, straight, conservative, theological, uninked, athletic-type, non-druggy, I stick out like a beacon. I got a couple kids full-time. Can’t take the easy way out and shed my standards. Gotta set an example. This day-game stuff’s pretty on-point.
I lived in Portland for 13 years, so I know the territory. Wish I could say it’s different somewhere else – and it is. The Midwestern region of the USA showcases women who are way different than urban slut-bags. So there is not only hope, there is paydirt if a guy is willing to spread his wings. The same holds true in small towns in Canada. But if you have to play in the urban zoo, you have to use tactics like bill-handling tricks. Every time I get the interest of some hot girl by spinning/handling bills with dexterity and speed, and she approaches me, I have disdain for her in my heart. But a guy has needs, and it’s a war my friend. Whatever you have to do to give yourself an edge, it’s fair game.
In the meantime, sticking to one’s guns is the only way to go (from a moral standpoint). Those are the things that make a man what he is, and elevate him above the common crowd. Doing so will pay off in the long run, and even though AWALT rules, there are some girls out there who are looking for a guy like you, and they will consider you as top-flight mating material if they ever land you – and they will be far less inclined to risk losing you by fooling around once they get you. So it isn’t all bad news.
Thanks, man. I really appreciate the reply. You lived in Portland? That makes me feel way less gone. Good to know there really is a difference across the way. You start to wonder if the grass is greener, or if it’s tough all over. Now I’m going to have to look into it more.
Yeah, I did live in Portland and I liked it. More strip clubs per capita than any other city in the USA (at least at the time I was there). If you have character, strength, and financial means, you are the type of male that small-town girls who were raised well – and they exist in the locales I mentioned – crave. The urban sluts, well, they are going to be what they are. But I have been continually amazed by how enthusiastic small-town girls are, when it comes to pursuing even an old man like me. GOJ knows about this, so do other guys around here. I spent about four months in Canada back in the day (circa 2003), and I had to literally fight off the good-looking young women who came after me, simply because I had frame and financial means.
Even if a guy isn’t set financially, so long as he is working towards a goal that women covet in men, he is going to get their attention. I don’t know your situation but even taking a vacation to a small town in the Midwest, let’s say – for example a college town, during the school year – might open your eyes substantially. Take no prisoners, man. Stick to your guns and your guns will get bigger. Eventually you’ll attract girls who are head and shoulders above the bitter sluts that permeate the urban areas. It’s a mathematical certainty. And even if you stick to the Portland area, in time you’ll still attract them, because they exist there, too, they just have to bury their small-town desires behind a mask of feminism and progressiveness. It’ll all work out. Look around, talk to guys about locales, spread your wings a bit…and above all else, seize the fucking day, my friend!
She has a turkey neck.
If that hipster wants the old bag, he can have her!
The is the epitome of the 4/8
She is an over the hill, turkey, neck, unbangable whore….but she is not fat so if she puts on a little black dress and heels and sits long enough in a place that serves alcohol someone will treat her like an 8 instead of the 4 that she is.
She looks like a 46 year old Ukrainian cougar looking for a Turkish dude to take her on vacation.
that is exactly what she looks like until some 30 year old guy who hasn’t gotten laid in 6 months has his 10th jameson.
What´s your obsession with big dicks, How a woman can tell by looking at him wearing pants if he have a bigus dickus? Unless is a micro penis once in bed she will open her legs after that who cares what she thinks.
Now i wonder if ROK is about American masculinity or it refer also to worldwide men, because i believe this article “may” be spot on in America only.
Now let’s see the first picture, is the same used in another article (london) where a guy could be jailed for daytime sexual harrasment just because he try to approach a woman.
On top of that, the article talks how you must abide to some sort of “game” just to entertain bitches in the hope to bang them.
imho this is a BETA tactics, why? well i look at myself, at my friends and everywhere i went in my life, and i saw that when a woman is “really” interested in you (no matter if it’s for sex, money, or she is only a dinner whore) she will litterally lend the key for her time!
on the other hand, the game promoted here aim at any men, no matter your age, body, wealth etc etc, and try to give you some advice who simply doesn’t not work for anyone and, in some situation, may put you in a direct /indirect danger to being arrested, robbed, tricked or else.
and on close of my reply, just think about what you want, do you really believe to find your wife in such society? and the follow question would be: are you sure you want to give up your freedom for an used vagina in pussyla-la-land? do you really need the trill of action and pretend to be someone who you aren’t just to be a “gamer” (aka buffon) and entertain a bitch -not a quality woman – who “may” give you sex?
Direct Body Language
Trump do not need body language, he got the power, it’s enought for any woman to get wet, every men who owns money doesn’t need body language, just show the cash and you are ready to go!
Indirect Verbal Language
refer to BOB SMITH pic (self explanatory)
Social intercurses are fine as long as you don’t act like a buffon and protect your masculine dignity.
Good build, casual aloof non-verbal (open, inviting but not as if you put any thought into it) combined with some laid back, easy banter = teh success.
As always with articles like this I like to remind the old hands that these are for the new guys in the ‘sphere who are getting down with the basics. It can seem a little like over analysis to seasoned vets, but the young bucks need to start from the beginning.
What stinks for the younger ones is that they should have had the opportunity to learn this from older brothers/fathers/messing psychologically with sisters.
Ambiguity has always worked well for me. Like touching and making sly comments alluding to the fact that I want to be deep in her slime hole, but she won’t know this for sure until I make a hard play
A place of evil that is. Strong with the Dark Side.
Slimy? Mudhole? My home, this is!
When fathers begin to give their daughters in marriage the world will start turning again.
or sell. a boy can make u money as he grows and what could be a better gift to return the favor with a wife? also the loses the other father incurred feeding and protecting the girl will be mitigated
Dowry is when the father approves of the guy so much that he’d pay him to marry his daughter. I have daughters and the idea sounds better than forking out 50 grand to send them away to some state party college where they get drunk, stoned and laid for four years. Marry them off young. Finding a power family to marry into is a bonus but red pill is a must.
Also for the wives, the west needs to implement chhaupadi. With more than one menstruating woman in the house, the douche pail overflows with festering crag and noxious vapors. The smell is emasculating and affects the men who inhale it. It’s like the male dog pee smell marking a dog’s territory only IN REVERSE.
In the west, so many homes have become bitch dominated henhouses. The ‘turf’ is marked with the powerful female pheromonal release from the ovarian discharge. The shit is chock full of hormones and stuff no man wants to breathe unless he wants his head kicked into phantom ‘lamaze’ mode.
The point of no return is when a pussywhipped beta man can’t even discern the smell in his own home. He’s used to it or doesn’t notice it. He thinks the place smells ‘homey’, but a visitor like me notices how much the inside reeks of death and pussywhippery. It’s worse than concentrated feet smell. It fucks with your manbrain and shorts your reasoning. This is because it is pheromonal.
Chhaupadi it is! Put the menstruating women out back in a tent for a week with water jugs, crackers, candles and a bible and above all avoid contact.
lol you been preaching this chhaupadi forever now. No knock on it or whatever the logic is, it’s just amusing I seen this from your posts consistently.
We lost our will to live when our daughters were “freed” T H E E N D
How The Fuck Did That Happen. Why did our culture do that I mean WHAT THE FUCKK Peaces of SHIT our recent fathers were FUCK They didn’t give a shit about us
Hey man, I agree with you 100%. That’s why many of us are here. Uncontrolled rage doesn’t do anyone any good however. You ok bro?
Ok, mystery question. Was Porcer banned? I was away for the weekend, now I’m hearing from him that he can’t post because he’s banned. He’s not one for personal attacks and provides a huge amount of very good and dry humor, I’m at a loss as to what he could have possibly done to rate a ban here? Just curious, because he apparently doesn’t know either.
I don’t know, but that long dissertation he wrote on the benefits of necrophilia-cannibalism really kind of freaked me out.
Hey, I’m not one to judge. I’m just saying.
Damn. I missed that one.
don’t know about the necro stuff but meat is meat
I pray to God that you’re being silly. Although if he wrote it I 100% assume that he meant it as satire or in jest. He’s a sound, well grounded man with a great sense of low key humor.
Yes, I was just joking.
Hey, who doesn’t want to crack open a cold one from time to time.
Well, your buddy Lolknee is certainly around so you should be happy.
And you’re around so I’m happy too.
I’m talking about a poster who has done neither you nor anybody any harm, who contributes humor along with very interesting intellectual content, whom all of us enjoy from every corner, and you take that as an opportunity to mock and sneer.
And you wonder why nobody likes you.
Agree. Porcer has a good sense of humor. I like his posts. But then again, Tom Arrow had many good and beneficial posts as well. And he’s gone too. And I liked PJC’s posts as well. He was funny as hell.
PJC, in his various incarnations, was some fun. And I admit it was a guilty pleasure to watch him and @ghostofjefferson:disqus
go at it.
don’t listen to @disqus_AtmzyNwX2l:disqus he is just tired from the side effects of the Odefsey
think he said he is from New Jersey, so that might explain it
ribs and pelvis bones do not feel sexy. I like getting bounced on and not when its bone
No game needed. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HRjxKFjxE9g
LMFAO @ all the fucking losers who run this site who can’t get a girlfriend : )
Good article. I would add don’t take it personally if things doesn’t work out the way you would have wished, take another step, forget it, and damn don’t be too confidential with girls in general (avoid it, whenever possible).